Forever
by Jocelyn Torrent
Summary: Bella meets Alice first. Think you've read them all? This one may pleasantly surprise you.
1. Chapter 1

Forever

I'd never been a fan of flying. It was always too cramped, too impersonal. I felt like an inconvenience to everyone, to the stewards, the other passengers, the plane. It made me feel dead… like I was flying into my own limbo. All of us a bunch of dead drones, tolerating one another for the sake of the hope that the plane wouldn't crash. It was quite depressing. But, it got the job done. It got me to my destination faster. My destination just happened to be Forks, Washington. Never heard of it? Unsurprising. There's nothing to hear about Forks. It's the typical town you read about in crappy clearance novels. Little population, minimal crime, nosey neighbors, the whole thing. It bored me just thinking about it. But, nevertheless, it was where I was going. And that's why I was on this plane. Forks was the home of my father, Charlie. My parents had been divorced for years and while she decided to move to sunny Phoenix afterwards, my father couldn't bear to part with the town he fell in love. When they parted, I went to live with my mother in Arizona. And we lived happily together for years. Then she met her husband, Phil. Long story short, she wanted to travel with him. And I'd taken enough of her time. So, for my dear mother, I moved to the aforesaid Forks. And here I am.

The plane landed rather smoothly. I looked out the window and saw nothing but grey skies and rain droplets. I sighed. I didn't think I would miss the sun so soon. Charlie was waiting for me at the baggage claim and I couldn't help but smile when I saw him. He looked just like I remembered. Dark moustache that was actually graying a little, stern expression but kind eyes. It was…comforting, to say the least, in this foreign place. I'd been to Forks before, but it was years ago. I hardly remembered it. He smiled back at me awkwardly before we embraced in a one armed hug.

"Hey, Bells, how ya' doing?" he asked gruffly before letting me go.

"I'm good. How've you been?" I answered as we headed over to the spinning conveyor belt.

"Oh, you know, solving crimes, dishing speeding tickets." He pointed to his police badge and I shook my head lightheartedly. He then coughed a bit loudly and there was no more conversation. I was fine with that. Charlie was never much of a talker. Neither was I, so it all worked out rather well. Because Forks was rather small, I actually landed in Port Angeles and there was still a little ways of a drive to go. As Charlie drove slowly and carefully down the rain soaked highways, I watched the images around me flash by. It was so bleak, negative, depressing. For a brief moment I wondered what the suicide rates were here. Not that I'd ever attempt anything so stupid.

After what seemed too long a time, Charlie's cruiser finally pulled into the driveway. I looked up at the old two-story and smiled softly. It hadn't changed a bit. It was just too bad that I had. After Charlie helped carry my bags up the stairs, he told me once more how happy he was that I was here and retreated downstairs. I was thankful for that. I definitely needed some alone time. Alone time to figure out what the hell I was thinking when I decided to move down here. I glanced at the clock on my bedside table. It was eight o'clock. One more hour and I could at least attempt to go to bed. I growled quietly and sat down on the ill used mattress. Well, at least it was something new. It may not be good, but it was something new. It was a fresh start from the lackluster life I'd been living. Who knew, maybe this town would be great. Or, maybe it would be a town of nosy cousin fuckers, French pardoned. I glanced over at the clock again. It had been a whole 3 minutes. Deciding it was good enough I changed and climbed into bed. Tomorrow was my official start of school and I didn't want to have rings under my eyes. I may not have been a fashionista but I wasn't completely hopeless to the point that I didn't care what I looked like. The sooner tomorrow came, the sooner it would be over so I closed my eyes and tried to drift off.

0-0-0-0-0

A light knock jolted me from my slumber. I was always an uneasy sleeper, so bolting upright in bed didn't surprise me anymore. The door creaked open as I looked over and Charlie's balding head peered through it. He looked nervous at first, but apparently after seeing I was fully clothed, he pushed the door open further and stood in the doorway. The light from behind him stung my eyes and I winced as I gazed upon him. He smiled awkwardly and kicked the doorframe.

"Mornin', Bells. I just thought I'd let you know that I'm heading off to work. I wanted to make sure you were awake before I left."

"Yeah, thanks, dad. I'm up." Charlie smiled at me and I managed to return it. He nodded once and looked over his shoulder.

"Um, well, your transportation's in the driveway. I won't wait around for you to see it just in case you hate it but it will get you to school. Keys are by the door. And the papers you need for school are on the kitchen counter. You…uh, need anything else?"

"I…uh, don't think so. Thanks, dad and I'll see you after work." He said everything too quickly for me to really ask the questions I wanted to, such as what the hell was in the driveway. But Charlie seemed discomfited enough so I decided not to bother him with it. I would see it soon anyway. Charlie opened his mouth as if to say something else but reconsidered and gave another small smile before lumbering down the steps. I listened as the stairs creaked with every step and sighed as the front door opened and slammed shut. By straining my ears I could hear the sound of his cruiser pulling onto the street. Then I was really alone. I finally made eye contact with the clock and saw that it was six o'clock. A little too early, but not enough for me to go back to sleep. Huffing, I slowly rotated and placed my feet on the carpet. It was slightly cold and I picked my feet up for a moment. They quickly got used to the feel, however and I quickly made my way to my suitcase to get out my toiletries before heading to the bathroom.

Well, I didn't look like an utter failure, but morning was definitely not my friend. However, thanks to my early start on sleep, there were no bags under my eyes. Lazily, I drug a brush through my hair and decided that a pony tail would be best. I would just tolerate that one stupid strand that always fell down my right cheek. A simple concealer and lip gloss were added and I was done. Easy part over, now came to the important stuff: what to wear. I smirked at myself in the mirror. Yeah right, like I had that many choices. T-shirt and pants, it wasn't that hard to decide. Still sort of smiling at my own good mood, I headed to my room and pulled out my clothes. I decided on the first two things that matched which happened to be a yellow shirt with blue writing and simple jeans. Thunder rumbled outside as I pulled the shirt over my head and I groaned. I'd forgotten about the constant precipitation here. No matter, I came prepared and also grabbed a light windbreaker with a hood. Thoroughly satisfied with my attire, I looked at the clock and was still about fifteen minutes ahead of schedule. This was good. If I got to school early and did all my paperwork quickly, I might not be late for first period and might also be spared from that awkward, 'look at the new kid' moment.

I headed down the stairs, noting how much I enjoyed the sound of my feet on the steps, and almost skipped into the kitchen. This light mood must have been to suppress my nerves but I wasn't complaining. I found the papers Charlie had mentioned quickly and briefly glanced at them before placing them in my messenger bag. Then I fumbled around in the kitchen in search for some breakfast, finally deciding on some Raisin Bran and non-expired milk. I'd sort of forgotten I was living with a bachelor. Nothing was in the fridge save for milk, beer and wienies. I guess it was my job to do the shopping now. I took a bite of the cereal and grimaced at the bland taste. Maybe doing the shopping wouldn't be too bad.

As I ate, I made special care not to glance down the hall and into the driveway. I couldn't really imagine what I'd gotten as a vehicle and I didn't want to know until it was time to go. That way, if I did hate it, I wouldn't have time to dwell on it. Silly fantasies ran through my mind about what the car was, be it a Mercedes, Ducati, Mustang. Maybe it was a horse. Maybe this place was hick enough that they rode horses to school. I almost choked on my cereal at the thought and toned down my cynicism as I rinsed my bowl. Then I stood in the hall, messenger bag over my shoulder, and tried to stare through the front windows. It wasn't at the correct angle to see and as I took my first step towards the door, my heart began racing. I was excited, actually excited about what was waiting for me. The key on the table gave no clue, as there was no brand on it. Shrugging, I opened the door, glanced to my left and gasped.

A red, old school Chevy. I didn't know much about cars but that was definitely what it was and I loved it. I smiled as I pressed my hands against the screen door, getting a better look. It was old, ugly and mine. And I loved it just for those reasons. Charlie could really come through for me. I'd have to remember to thank him when he got home. Closing the door behind me, I bounded down the steps and practically skipped to the front door. It creaked open and I noted the rusty, worn sides. The seatbelts only went over my lap and it was a standard with nostalgic dials and interior. "Awesome," I muttered to myself as I put the key in the ignition. Thank god my mother thought that knowing how to drive a stick was something every woman should know. The truck stalled for only a moment before roaring to life. I actually jumped at the sound, it was so deafening. Then I patted the dash and put it in gear and pulled out of the drive. Another good reason I was getting to school so early…no one would be able to laugh at my truck while I was still in it.

By the time I arrived at school, it was seven o'clock. I'd gotten out to go in, only to discover that the school didn't even open its doors until seven thirty. So, with a huff, I crawled back into my truck to sit and wait. The rain pattered lightly on my windshield and I watched as it made obscure designs on the glass. I always secretly loved the rain. It was very…pure to me. Granted, I'd always be a sun girl at heart, being born and raised in Phoenix, but I would also always hold a soft spot for rain. I let my mind wander as I watched more kids slowly pull into the parking lot. I thought about my mother, about Charlie, school and my truck and debated with myself on to what to make of it. Just as I was certain to coming to a conclusion, something caught my eye. It was a small silver Volvo and it was practically careening (but with expertise) into the parking lot. I followed it as it passed me and parked a few rows behind me. The occupants in the car just sat there for a moment before the door finally burst open. Someone stepped out of the passenger seat and just as they were about to turn around, someone came up and knocked on my window. In spite of myself, I let out a slight scream and almost flew to the other side of the truck. The boy on the other side of the window, an Asian guy with great looking hair but poor skin grinned widely at me and motioned for me to open the door.

"Sorry, you scared me," I murmured as I complied with his request and stepped out of the car.

"Oh, I'm sorry I scared you," he replied, obviously trying to be cool. "I'm Eric, Forks High newspaper editor. You're Isabella Swan, right?" I was about to answer when he nodded, answering for me and writing something on one of those cliché notepads. He had the makes for a journalist that was for sure. "I was wondering if you needed a guide for your first day?" He grinned again, a smile that I just barely trusted and pulled out a camera and taking a picture of my face.

"It's Bella. I'm sorry, am I news or something?" I asked a little too rudely as I rubbed the flash from my eyes.

"Yep," Eric replied, pocketing the camera. "A new student is huge news at Forks. I mean, who would honestly choose to come here." He laughed and I decided that I liked the way it sounded. However, I didn't like the sound of me being news. I just wanted to blend. That's what I did: blended.

"Uh, actually…Eric, could you not do a story about me? I'd rather sort of just sneak myself in, if you catch my drift?"

"Uh…sure, no story," he replied dejectedly, though I couldn't bring myself to care. "So, may I walk you to class?" I glanced at the clock, noting that it was just now seven thirty and sighed.

"Thanks, Eric. But I'm just going to the office and the school is small enough. I don't want to burden you."

"It wouldn't be a burden, honestly." He flashed me a smile and I started to feel the 'puppy' vibe from him. I needed to get away from this guy quickly. Not that he seemed all that bad, I just didn't do clingy.

"No, thank you. But I'll definitely look for you in the cafeteria, okay?" I promised, forcing what I thought was a weak smile. If it was weak, Eric didn't seem to notice and he laughed again before making me swear and running off to a tacky looking van. I shook my head after him and followed the small strands of students into the building. A few of them stared, but not long enough for me to take it as anything but an observation. Perhaps I wasn't giving this town enough credit. The office was just inside the doors and the women were nice enough and not incompetent. My paperwork was finished and filed quickly and I walked out with my new schedule in hand. Advanced English, physics, pre-calc, lunch, Economics, art and a free last period… not too bad. At least all of my harder subjects were out of the way early. As I was glancing at my schedule I accidentally bumped into someone. It rather hurt. In fact, whatever I hit was so hard I almost worried I'd tanked into a pole. However, looking up confirmed my initial thought.

The girl was a few inches taller than me, pale as snow with intense brown eyes. Her blonde hair fell in beautiful ringlets around her face and her plump lips formed a grimace that was still gorgeous. I'd just bumped into the most beautiful, scary thing I'd ever seen. And she was glaring at me. Actually, she wasn't really glaring. That just appeared to be the way her face fell. She stared at me for a good minute before I finally managed to make my brain make words. "S-sorry."

Her eyes scanned for a moment and I watched as she inhaled deeply. Then her eyes closed for a moment and she shoved past me, causing me to almost lose my balance. I turned and watched as she barged down the hall, knocking over two freshmen in her way. Note to self: stay out of her way. Deciding to shake it off (beautiful high schoolers were rude, it was common knowledge) I made my way down a short hall and entered my English class. Thankfully, the teacher didn't make a fuss about my arrival and I quickly sat down, scribbling my name in the Hamlet book she'd given me.

"Hey," a semi-sultry voice cooed at me. Resisting the urge to groan out loud I looked up into a boy's face. He had a round, prepubescent face and dirty blonde hair with blue as that weren't particularly anything. Overall he was cute but I could tell by his voice that he was going to be a pest, too. "You're Bella Swan, right?" He smiled again, then must have noticed my perplexed expression because he spoke quickly again. "E-Eric told me that's what you wanted to be called."

"Oh, hey…"

"Mike. Mike Newton."

"Hey…Mike Newton."

"Just Mike."

I sighed, not being able to help myself. "Hey, Mike."

"Hey,"

This conversation was turning out like I had expected it to so I quickly tuned out, nodding and humming when it seemed appropriate. Mike, like Eric, also seemed like a nice guy. But…they were too much too soon. It was my first day… a little breathing room would have been nice. I wasn't being shallow or anything; I just didn't know what to do with all of this attention. I mean, just by considering two people 'attention' shows how little experience I have with it. Mike seemed to catch my subtle drift after a few minutes and, while still looking hopeful, he turned back to face the teacher. Greatly relieved, I smiled at the back of his head and picked up my book to learn all about the enigmatic Hamlet.

After English, Mike offered to walk me to my next class. At first I couldn't think of a good excuse to let him down but we soon discovered my class was nowhere near his and he would be late if he took me. With promises to talk later, he ran down the hall, book-checking a freshman as he went. I rolled my eyes at him and made my way down what I assumed was the right hall. Apparently though, it was the wrong hall. I ended up having to ask someone where to go and by the time I found the right room, the late bell had rung about two minutes ago. Thankfully, I had the new student excuse. Not so thankfully, I was going to be the object of everyone's attention for at least four minutes while I got situated. The door was locked when I attempted it so I knocked twice. I could hear the room fall quiet as everyone peered through the door. My cheeks were already red. Great. The teacher, Mr. Ibarra, finally came to the door and smiled at me as I introduced myself and offered my schedule for proof I was supposed to be in here. He nodded, pushing his glasses up on his nose and led me in the room, where all fourteen kids were staring from their lab tables.

"Class, this is Isabella Swan. She's new, make her comfortable and such," he grunted before taking a seat at his desk and searching through a drawer. I quickly corrected him on my name and he insured he understood by saying my name again in his next sentence. "Bella, please sit next to Alice. Alice, raise your hand." A frail hand shot up confidently to my right and I immediately looked over. The girl known as Alice was sitting at a lab table and she gave a wincing smile as I made eye contact with her. I couldn't move. I had thought that the girl I'd bumped into this morning was beautiful but this girl…was stunning. Her skin was just as pale white but her eyes were a lighter topaz brown. Her raven hair was cut short and styled well in spikes around her pointed face. I'd never felt so ugly in my life.

"Bella?" Mr. Ibarra interrupted my thoughts. "Bella, you can take your seat now. Alice won't bite." The class giggled a bit as Alice shifted awkwardly in her chair, almost as if she were offended by his comment. I took a step forward and noticed how alertly the girl watched my movements. I almost felt like the prey to her predator. My cheeks reddened again and as I felt the burn, Alice jerked her head away. I made it to the table and sat down as Mr. Ibarra began writing formulas on the board. I watched him, while keeping an eye out for Alice in the corner of my eye. Her head was buried and turned away from me. I could see her hands grasping the purse in her lap tightly and bit down on my lip, subtle sniffing my shirt. I didn't smell, I thought. Maybe she was just antisocial? No, that didn't make sense because she seemed very welcoming at the beginning. Mr. Ibarra instructed us to take notes now and both Alice and I pulled out our notebooks at the same time. I watched as Alice flipped to her most recent note page and saw how gorgeous her handwriting was. Archaic almost but with the gentle sweeps of more modern writing. My own chicken scratch was practically screaming embarrassment from my notebook and I scoffed at it as I reached for a pencil in the cup in the middle of the table.

I hadn't noticed that Alice was already reaching for a pencil, too and our hands briefly touched before we both jerked away. Instinctively, I wrapped my hand around the other to warm it. Alice's hand was freezing, inhumanely freezing. I looked over at her and she made eye contact with me this time, giving me an embarrassed half smile before grabbing a pencil and extending it to me. I took it, taking care not to touch her and smiled back, feeling the blush return to my cheeks. Alice stiffened and exhaled very slowly as she turned her entire body away from me and began to take notes. I stared at her for a few moments more. She was polite, but straining against her etiquette. It was like she was trying to be friendly but something was holding her back. Perhaps she was possessed. An interesting thought. Knowing it was rude to stare, I picked up my pencil and began scribbling down formulas like everyone else. I'd find out more about this Alice later.


	2. Chapter 2

Certain Pale Person

The rest of class was uneventful, if you ignore my constant staring at the girl next to me. Alice was, in her own unique way, very captivating to me. Her beauty, her mannerisms, her freaking perfume; it all just drew me in. I wanted more. I almost needed more. I almost laughed out loud at my own thoughts. It was like I was back in middle school and Alice was the popular girl that everyone wanted to be friends with in hopes that it carried over to high school. Honestly, I'd never been that girl. Not even in middle school. Reading a book in the corner of the cafeteria always suited me just fine. But now, now as a seventeen year old in high school I wanted to be friends with Alice…Alice what? Casually as I could muster, I glanced at the note sheet she'd scribbled her name on. Culler. Alice Culler. I wanted to be her friend. If not her friend, then I just didn't want to be hated by her. However, I didn't seem to be doing very well at the moment. Just then, she turned her head and looked up at me. She must have sensed my staring. Our eyes met for a brief moment. Before I could recognize, however, her eyes darted down to my empty note sheet.

"Uh…" I tried to speak but the girl was staring at me. She was so pretty. I wanted to tell her how pretty she looked but knew that it would come out weird. So instead, I mooed like a freaking cow. Good job, Swan; she definitely likes you now. Alice ran her tongue over her lips and I noted the shine of them afterwards. Then she softly grinned again and held her own finished paper to me. I took it without really knowing what was going on and she gave a short laugh and shook her head before turning away again, this time leaning even closer to the open window next to her. Released from her beautiful bind, I finally gained enough sense to stare down at the paper. Oh, she gave me her paper to copy. Great, now she thought I was a slacker. Huffing just a bit too loudly to where a kid in front of me turned around, I quickly scribbled the answers down, absorbing and memorizing Alice's handwriting rather than the material I was copying. It was so pretty, too. And the work she'd done seemed effortless. No scratch outs or rewrites of the work. I worked out a problem on scratch paper quickly and indeed the answer was right. So she was smart as well. Damn, I was a loser. I finished the sheet and glanced at her name again, deducting that her name was Cullen, not Culler.

She was still looking away when I finished so I casually tapped the paper against her shoulder. She turned and grabbed it lazily, not giving eye contact. It was like it was happening in slow motion. Her motions were so fluid, so…trained almost. Like she'd been perfected in everything she did. She was the finished version of what a human could be. Pristine and…did I mention beautiful? Alice was turning around again and I realized that I didn't want to her. Panicking, I said the first thing that came to mind.

"Cullen,"

Alice glanced at me again, turning her head to the side and furrowing her brow a bit. "What?" she asked. Though somehow I knew she'd heard me. It took me a minute to answer, however because I was still in shock over the sound of her voice. High, but not annoying. Rather, it was melodic and filling. It took me at least twelve seconds before I realized that I was supposed to respond. And even that wasn't enough time for me to develop a decent response to what I'd just said.

"Y-you're last name is Cullen," I stuttered, internally punching myself in the gut…repeatedly. Alice stared at me for a few seconds more before she gave me the 'I'm not trying to take your helmet' look and nodded.

"Yes, it is."

I opened my mouth to try to make up for my slip of the tongue but the bell rang before I could utter another syllable. It was probably for the best. Alice held my gaze a few moments more and I started to blush again, utterly hating myself. As soon as I felt the heat enter my cheeks, she was gone, out the door before I could even turn my head. 'Smooth move,' I scolded myself as I gathered my books and walked out into the hall. Math was next, pre-calc to be exact. Perhaps that would take my mind off of the jackass moves I'd just pulled against an innocent teen. This class was much easier to find than the previous one as it was just upstairs. I walked in minutes before the tardy bell and did the same process with my calculus teacher, Ms. Cassidy, who looked like she could kill you with her death glare. Looks weren't everything; however, as she was completely civil with me and gave me free seating. I looked around the room, which was slowly filling and felt that same unease entering me. Nothing was more embarrassing then sitting in someone else's chair, especially if you were the new kid. A sudden movement caught my eye and I glanced over to a girl with dirty blonde hair waving me over. Thankful for any sort of help, I quickly made my way over and sat down in the chair next to her.

"You looked like you were about to pass out," she uttered shyly after I'd sat down. I looked over at her and smiled. I liked her already. She had that dirty blonde hair, hazel eyes and just a few too many freckles. But she seemed to know what to do and say and that was a hell of a lot better than what I could do at the moment.

"New kid panic attacks, you know?" I joked, feeling better about the fact that I could have a conversation. The girl smiled at me before jumping a little in her chair.

"Oh, sorry, manners… I'm Angela."

"Bella,"

"Nice to meet you,"

"And you,"

We smiled at each other again as the tardy bell rang. Ms. Cassidy stood with a manila folder in her hand and proceeded to take roll. I watched as her eyes scanned over the empty desk on the other side of the room and filled with discontent. "Has anyone seen Ms. Cullen?" she demanded, giving the death glare I knew she possessed.

"She was in physics just a second ago," a boy from my previous class with wild hair answered. Ms. Cassidy made a clicking noise with her tongue and angrily checked the absence on the paper. I stared over at the desk. So, Alice was in this class with me as well. But she wasn't here now. She couldn't have been that affected by me, could she? I scoffed, wrenching a pencil from my bag. Conceited, much? The girl was probably just in the bathroom. Or maybe she was a skipper. Either way, her absence had nothing to do with me. Something nudged my arm and I realized that Angela was handing me a spiral of recent notes to copy. I thanked her silently and she nodded. I definitely liked her. She wasn't much of a talker. I copied her notes quickly, absently comparing her handwriting to Alice's as I did so. While Angela's was neat, it wasn't as archaic or as flowing as Alice's. Of course, both were ten times better than mine. Making a note to practice my handwriting, I handed the notebook back to her. Our fingers brushed and I almost expected hers to be just as freezing as Alice's were. Obviously they weren't and that made me wondered why in the hell I cared about finger temperature.

"So, did you have a lunch partner?" Angela asked politely after the bell rang for lunch. I nodded, heaving a rather big sigh. I would much rather eat lunch with quiet little Angela then overly-hormonal Mike or prepubescent Eric. But I wasn't one to go back on my word.

"Yeah, Mike Newton and Eric someone from the newspaper has already invited me," I answered, hoping that she caught my dejection. Surprisingly, she just smiled.

"Oh, that's my group."

I grinned at her, thankful that I wouldn't be alone in the testosterone parade, and allowed her to lead the way to the lunch room. The lunch was fairly standard; questionable looking pasta, a roll, pudding and juice. Gag-worthy yet so familiar to the meal at my old school that I actually welcomed it. Angela was still in front of me and I allowed her to lead the way to where a grinning Mike and waving Eric were waiting. There was another girl at the table with them. She had dark brown hair and tanned skin which had to be fake given the cloud coverage of this town. "Bella!" she squealed as I sat down in between her and Angela. "I'm Jessica and these two have told me all about you." I smiled politely at her and stared down my pasta as she chattered on. I could already hear it in her voice. She didn't really like me. She was tolerating me because everyone else in her group did. I couldn't stand people like this. I just wanted to scream at her to get her own identity. But, that was rude. So I opted to spoon the pudding instead.

The chatter from the group continued on for a few minutes without me having to speak. Mostly Eric and Mike fought over speaking while Jessica tried to throw her two cents in now and then. Angela was absorbed in trying to finish the calculus homework we had so that she wouldn't have to do it at home. I had succeeded in turning my pudding into a volcano, a heart and a bone and was now in the process of making waves when I heard the cafeteria doors open. Casually looking up, I noticed the beautiful blonde from this morning. She was walking in with this beast of a man beside her. His hair was cut short and jet black and his neck was about the size of my thigh. His muscles were straining against the fabric of his shirt and I felt intimidated just by being in his presence.

"I see you've noticed the Cullens," Angela whispered from my side. I nodded, then glanced over at her, recognizing the name.

"The Cullens?" Angela nodded as Jessica, who had overheard, looked over at them and scoffed.

"The Cullens," she mocked under her breath, twirling her finger in sarcastic fanfare. Angela ignored her dramatics and continued on.

"The Cullens are all the adopted children of Dr. Carlisle Cullen, the new physician in town. The pretty blonde one is Rosalie Hale and the big one next to her is her boyfriend, Emmett Cullen. Jessica finds it disgusting that they're dating but they're not really related, you know?" I nodded, continuing to stare. Rosalie's eyes met mine and they formed into a scowl as she passed. Emmett smirked at me and gave Rosalie a nudge on the arm, to which she popped him in the back of the head. As they walked past, I saw another one from their group following behind. I looked up at him to find him staring intently at me. Instinctively I drew back in my chair. His eyes followed mine with that deep look until finally he had to turn away, looking slightly ill at ease. "And that was Edward Cullen," Angela said, answering my thoughts. "He's the youngest and he always looks like that. There's usually another, Alice, but I guess she's left for the day."

I nodded, still staring at the group. So, Alice belonged with them. It made sense. They all had that strange pale skin and glowing topaz eyes. And though I'd heard that they were all adopted, I would have let them pass for relation. They had the same looks and mannerisms at each other. Edward, the one with the fiery bronze hair, was leaning over the table, whispering quickly with Rosalie and Emmett. All at once, they both turned to stare at me and I immediately turned around in my seat, still feeling their eyes on me. "Well," Jessica said, noticing the exchange, "Looks like our Bella here can really turn some heads if the high and mighties themselves are noticing." Almost as if they'd heard from across the room, I could see Edward's and Emmett's faces contorting into a smug grin. Rosalie, however, appeared un-amused at whatever was so funny to the boys. Curious, I turned to Jessica.

"Why don't you like them?"

"Because they think they're too good for anyone here. It's just rude," she scoffed, flipping her hair angrily.

"Long story short, Edward turned her down and she's never really gotten over it," Angela said softly, causing a glare from Jessica. I had to laugh then. Jessica was the type that was always fun to laugh at and I took advantage of the moment. Angela joined in and we both laughed together despite the icy glares we received. When we both calmed down, I casually acted on my curiosity again.

"So, Alice is normally with them? I sat next to her in physics today," I said as I peered at their table again. For some reason I thought that if I waited long enough, the girl would magically appear. Angela nodded, closing her calculus book and sighing with relief at its completion.

"Yeah, Alice is the middle one I believe. She and Edward aren't a couple though from what I've seen. She's pretty fun to watch. She's always smiling and laughing. I wish I had her optimism sometimes."

"Optimistic?" I asked, furrowing my brow. "She was…really weird when I sat next to her. It was like, she was trying to be nice but couldn't really." I felt eyes on me and looked over my shoulder to see the Cullens all staring at me. My cheeks flushed and I put a hand to them, hoping to cool the burn.

"Well, she's really quiet in class. But when she's with her family she acts like I said. She acted weird around you?" Angela seemed genuinely curious which made me feel like less of a clown. Jessica laughed next to me and gave me a light shove.

"Maybe you stink, Bella," she half-joked. Taking Angela's stance, I just ignored her. Angela playfully rolled her eyes at the brunette and mouthed to me that I didn't stink. And truthfully, that made me feel a bit better. "Whatever, Bella," Jessica said, applying lipstick with help of her compact. "They keep to themselves so don't worry about them. They don't care about you so you shouldn't care about them." Angela shrugged at this comment, possibly agreeing, and I frowned. I wanted them to care. At least, I wanted one of them to care.

The rest of the day went by uneventfully. I saw no sign of Alice again and was actually feeling a little disheartened as I walked towards my old Chevy after school. As I climbed in and listened to the engine roar embarrassingly to life, I saw the shiny Volvo in front of me. Emmett, Rosalie and Edward all seemed to be staring me down. I watched them watch me for a few minutes before I started to feel violated. Then I quickly threw the truck into gear and pulled out of the lot, shaking the chills out of my spine.

Charlie wasn't home when I got there so I went to the kitchen. There was nothing in the refrigerator but sandwich in meat. I guessed I would just make him a sandwich when I got home and proceeded to do my homework at the kitchen table, having nothing better to do. Just when I had a few problems left on my calculus, the phone rang.

"Hey, Bells,"

"Hey, Dad, what's up?"

"I was calling to tell you that I'm gonna be late tonight. We've had some sort of…issue down here and there's a lot that still needs to be done. Are you gonna be okay for the evening?"

"Sure, no problem. Just be careful."

"Will do. How was school,"

"Oh, you know…school."

"Did you make some friends?"

"Yeah, a few. It was fine, dad. Don't worry."

"Alright…well I have to go now, sleep well when you do."

"Bye, dad."

The phone disconnected and I glanced over at the clock. By the time I finished my calculus and science homework and started on my English paper, it might be an adequate time to go to bed. Fun, fun. I was a regular partier all right. Sighing again, I sat down at the table and finished my paper. As I worked, my thoughts drifted to that certain pale person I'd been thinking about all day. The main thought was why I was thinking about her. Sure, she was super pretty and sometimes you thought about pretty people. But, this extensively seemed like overkill. And what was up with her attitude? Angela had said she seemed happy but when I saw her, she looked pained. Maybe she had some mental issues. It didn't seem all that farfetched the more I thought about it. And then there was her random and sudden departure after class. I just couldn't put my finger on what was up with that girl. Only one thing was for certain: she was definitely interesting.

After I felt I'd completed plenty on my English paper, I glanced at the clock. It was nine thirty; perfectly adequate time to go to bed to. I quickly put my stuff back in my book bag and laid it across the chair before climbing up the stairs to my room. There, I changed into a tank top and some athletic shorts. Having done all of that homework had actually made me tired and I welcomed the sleep that came easily that night.

I woke up suddenly during the night but didn't dare open my eyes. My heart was racing and it took me a few minutes to register why. A noise. There had been a noise. There had been a noise in my bedroom that had woken me up. That made my heart pound even faster. Who or what the hell was in my room. There was the sound of padded feet on the carpet. Someone was standing at the foot of my bed. I licked my lips, accidentally letting out a shuddering breath. They must have heard me. They knew I was awake now, if they didn't before. Well, there was no need in keeping my eyes closed if they knew I was awake. Slowly, I opened my eyes and glanced at the foot of my bed. Their skin was pale white and glowed in the darkness of my room. They hitched when they saw my eyes upon them and I took the opportunity to switch on my bedside lamp. There were pitch black eyes, spiked hair and red full lips. Then, the figure was gone. I looked around my bedroom, finding nothing but my open window that I couldn't for the life of me remember if it was opened or closed before I went to bed. Once I was certain that person had left, I crawled back into bed.

I had just seen Alice Cullen in my bedroom. It must have been a dream. It had to have been a dream.

I had just seen Alice Cullen. And it didn't seem like a fucking dream.


	3. Chapter 3

Lunch

Needless to say, I didn't sleep for the rest of the night. I knew that if she had in fact been there, Alice was long since gone. But her presence was still there, lingering within my room. I remember staring straight ahead at where I thought I'd seen her for the longest time. For my own personal stalker moment, I even got out of bed and went over to the spot where I'd seen her and stood facing my bed. I felt…cold standing there. It was nice though, a refreshing kind of cold that must of have come from my window. The more I thought about that window the more I was sure it was closed by the time I went to bed. However, I shook it off, thinking that it was my paranoia getting the better of me. And yet there was a part of me that wanted me to be right…wanted to think that Alice had in fact crept through my window and was watching me as I slept. What a weirdo.

I don't remember how long I stood there barefoot on the carpet, listening for anything other than my quieted breaths, but it felt like forever. By the time I'd forced myself back to bed and actually fallen asleep, the cold light of the morning was already creeping through the bottom of my window. Instantly I wished that I'd just stayed up all night because I felt as if I were hung over. Not that I even knew that feeling, but I knew it felt like crap. And I felt like crap. No…worse than crap. I crawled out of bed and stood, stretching my back. Then I headed out the door into the bathroom. I could hear Charlie downstairs, rumbling around in the kitchen. Knowing there was nothing to eat I made a mental note to go to the store today. Mom had given me some money just in case I needed it before I could get a job. Speaking of job, I made another mental note to ask around the grocery store for help wanted. But in the meantime, it would be nice to surprise Charlie with a home cooked meal. It was then that I realized I hadn't even thanked him for the truck. Wanting to catch him before he left, I checked that my attire was dad-appropriate and ran down the stairs.

"Hey, Dad?" I called as I touched the first floor.

"Yeah, Bells?" I heard the scuff of a chair in the kitchen as he scooted back to search for me. My bare feet smacked the wooden floor as I headed through the walkway. Charlie was sitting at the breakfast nook with the Daily Forks paper splayed across the small table in front of him. I noticed his cup of coffee was empty and I grabbed it as I gave him a 'round the shoulders hug.

"Thanks for the truck, Dad. I love it," I said as I refilled his cup and handed it to him. He took it, though his eyes never left mine. My smile slowly began to fade as he studied me with his eyes. It wasn't until I shuffled my feet, which were sticking to the tile that he even moved. Then his face broke into a grin and he shook his head.

"You're welcome, Bells. Sorry for that it's just…you were never such an extrovert. But, it's been a while since I've last seen you so I should have expected some changes." He smiled again and tipped his cup to me as a thank you. Since I couldn't find an appropriate response, I mumbled something about getting ready for school and ran back up the stairs to the bathroom. Once there I took a good long look in the mirror. Why was I acting so extroversive? It sure as hell wasn't like me at all. Maybe this place would be good for me after all, so long as I'm not visited every night by something it, be it fear or physical.

The hair on the back of my neck stood up as I replayed last night in my mind. It was an eerie, paranoid feeling. While I thought it had been Alice, the more I thought about it in my more lucid state, the more irrational and…well…pathetic it sounded. It was painfully obvious I had scared the color out of that girl (literally) with my idiocy so why in the world would she be in my room in the middle of the night staring at me? Furthermore, why would anyone be in my room in the middle of the night staring at me? The answer was: No one was. I was just nuts. I shrugged and rolled my eyes at my reflection. Then I grimaced. I looked like hell. Apparently, staying up all night does not do wonders for any part of your body. Dark, puffy rings were formed around my brown eyes and my skin looked paler than normal, which was really saying something. My hair, which had been washed yesterday, looked greasy. A ponytail was a must for today. Sighing, I pulled my hair into a ponytail and applied deodorant before heading back to my room. I was too tired to worry about makeup. It didn't do that much anyway. I glanced out the window in my room and noted that there was a light cloud covering. I most likely wouldn't need a jacket today. So I slipped on a clean shirt, jeans and pulled on my shoes before I headed downstairs again.

Much to my surprise, Charlie was still in the kitchen when I came down. He nodded at my entrance and watched as I poured myself some Raisin Bran. Charlie watched me until I sat down, then he flattened the paper. "So, tell me about school. I mean, I really want to know. I've missed a lot of your life, it seems." I took a bite of cereal to buy some time to get my thoughts straight about what exactly I should tell him. This town was small. Maybe by mentioning Alice's name I would get a bit more information on her. It couldn't hurt.

"Well, I found my classes okay. This girl, Angela, is really nice. I had lunch with her. And this girl, Alice Cullen, thinks I'm pretty well a freak." Charlie's brow furrowed at the mentioning of her name.

"Alice Cullen thinks you're a freak? She's the shorter one?" I nodded. "Huh, that's strange. She was extremely nice when I met her. Dr. Cullen's her father, you know. He's a real nice man. I quite like him. Like their whole family, actually. Why doesn't she like you?"

"Well…I don't know if she doesn't like me but…I don't know. She just acted strange around me." I felt my cheeks reddening. This conversation was becoming awkward for me for some reason and I really didn't like it. Charlie mulled over what I'd said for a few minutes before he shrugged and took a sip of his coffee.

"Well, I don't know what to tell you, Bells. Maybe you both just got off on the wrong foot. Try something new with her today."

I nodded blankly. The conversation had been a total bust. Charlie meant well, but this type of talk clearly wasn't his forte. The rest of my breakfast and Charlie's coffee was spent in silence. I didn't mind at all. I liked quiet. And Charlie was good at quiet. It worked out quite well. I stood up to put my bowl in the sink, taking Charlie's mug with me. He declined another refill and stood up to put on his jacket as I rinsed the dishes. "Say, do you remember the Blacks, Bella? Jacob and Billy?" I racked my brain for a moment before it came to me.

"Oh, from the Reservation?"

"Yeah, Jacob's about your age now. Anyway, Billy Black's invited us over for dinner Friday night. So, it'd be nice if you didn't make any plans. They're both dying to see you."

"Okay, sure," I answered, knowing I wouldn't have any plans. But it was nice of him to infer that I might.

"Great, great…well, I'll be gettin' on, then. How's your truck running?"

"Great, Dad thanks."

"Sure, see you this evening."

"Okay, I'll make something for dinner."

Charlie paused in the doorway and I looked over at him. He turned and gave the ceiling a hopeful look. I can't remember the last time I've had a home cooked meal. That'll be something new, Bells. Have a good day."

"You too,"

He waved lightly and headed out the door. I heard the smooth sound of his cruiser starting and compared it to the roar of my truck. They were almost too different to compare but I knew I liked the sound of mine better. By the time I finished the dishes and brushed my teeth it was time to leave for school. I grabbed my bag, double checking that all of my work was in there, and headed out the door again. Knowing how early I'd arrived the day before, I took the drive more carefully, noting the scenery. It was pretty and the foliage was so starkly different from Arizona that I found it quite interesting. By the time I'd made it to school, the parking lot was significantly more crowded than yesterday. I felt everyone's eyes on my truck and though my cheeks flushed, I forced my expression to remain proud. This was my truck, not theirs. I liked it and it shouldn't matter what they thought about it. Though it was more crowded, I had no trouble getting a decent spot and still had ten minutes to wait. I fiddled with the radio but it appeared to be stuck on a.m. and who likes a.m.? So I just sat and watched the people. They were all fairly interesting in their own way and they seemed to find me interesting as well as not a single pair of eyes escaped mine.

With about five minutes before the bell rang, I heard a roaring sound from my left. I turned just in time to note a massive burgundy jeep pulling into the spot a row in front of me. The brake lights went off instantly and three doors opened. Out popped the Cullens, looking just as vibrant in the crowd of the mediocre. Emmett had been the driver while Rosalie was in the passenger seat. They clasped hands as they headed up the stairs. Edward jerked open his door and went around to open the final door. He appeared to be quite the gentleman. Alice jumped down from the jeep and rolled her eyes playfully at Edward as if she didn't like to be waited on. Interesting. Edward gave her the queerest looking crooked grin I'd ever seen and tousled her hair in a brotherly manner. Brotherly…that meant that they weren't together like Emmett and Rosalie. Alice shoved him off and turned. As she did, her eyes met mine. It happened so quickly that I couldn't look away as if it were coincidence. So I sat there like a moron and stared back at her. A funny expression formed on Alice's pixie-like face before she turned and mouth something to Edward that I couldn't read. He glanced over at me with that same glare Angela said he always possessed. He stared me down until the bell rang, then he angrily brushed past Alice and ran up the stairs.

Alice stayed behind and continued to look at me curiously. I couldn't seem to find it within myself to move. I knew I was going to be late and I really hated being late. I just kept staring at her. It had started raining and it momentarily distorted her face through my windshield. That was when I woke up from my daze and was able to grab my bag and hop out of my truck. As soon as I closed the door, someone spoke.

"Hi,"

I jumped and squealed. Yes, I squealed at the sound and turned to the source of the noise. Alice was standing next to the truck and her eyes were widened with humor, most likely at my antics. "H-hi," I managed to mumble, my cheeks burning. "Sorry, you scared me."

"So it would seem," she answered, her voice smooth and inviting. I wanted her to speak more just so I could hear it but I couldn't come up with anything to say to further the conversation. Alice watched me for a few more seconds then turned towards the school. "Let's head to class. The late bell will sound soon." She started walking and motioned for me to follow, which I did. As we ascended the steps I glanced at my watch and sighed.

"I'm going to be late."

"Oh, I doubt that," the pixie answered in a suspicious tone. I decided it was better to think nothing of it rather than dwell on the tone of her voice. At least she was talking to me.

"So, um, I'm sorry for yesterday…and today. I sort of acted like a spaz."

Alice giggled and it officially became my favorite laugh ever. "Yes, you were quite spastic, but I seem to have that effect on people. Don't worry about it. I actually wanted to apologize as well. I know I came off as horridly rude. I'm afraid I wasn't feeling too well yesterday and I shouldn't have taken that out on you. Especially since you're a new student and such. Do you forgive me?" She looked up at me with big, hopeful eyes and I almost melted back down the steps. What was it like to be that captivating? Surely I would never know.

"Oh, n-no problem." Alice broke into a huge grin and gave me a light hug, to which I froze on the spot. She was very…hard. It wasn't at all what I expected, but I didn't say I didn't' enjoy it. The poor girl only just came to my shoulder and as I tried to make use of my arms to hug her back, I heard the minute sound of her inhaling deeply. Then there was another sound. It sounded like a moan…possibly a whimper but that couldn't have been it. Before I could place it, Alice released me and grinned contentedly.

"Well, this is your class, isn't it? I'll see you in physics, Bella. Goodbye." And she was gone before I could formulate my own farewell, skipping down the hall. I watched her go and then walked in the door just as the tardy bell rang. I wasn't late, just as Alice had said. I almost looked back out the door but thought better of it and took my seat behind Mike Newton. He turned and slapped my desk loudly. I guess that was something boys did.

"Hey, Bella," he said, before his nose wrinkled just a bit. "Hey, you smell really nice."

"Oh…um, thanks, Mike," I answered awkwardly. He nodded and turned around as the teacher began speaking. I frowned to the back of his head. I couldn't have smelled nice. I mean, surely I didn't stink but smelling nice seemed a little farfetched. I hadn't showered or applied anything but scentless deodorant this morning. As casually as I could muster, I sniffed the front of my shirt. My eyes literally rolled back into my head. I smelled damn good. But it wasn't me; it was Alice. Alice had left her amazing perfume on my shirt. Who was complaining? Thrilled, I lay back in my chair and waited for first period to end. All the while I thought about Alice, obviously. I wondered why she'd stared at me so long in the parking and then met me and walked me to class. It seemed very odd considering our encounter yesterday. Not to mention the fact that she didn't seem sick yesterday, but…possessed, as I'd contemplated before. And then there was the conversation between her and Edward that appeared to be about me and didn't seem to go all that well. Edward was a very intimidating guy; I'd hate to be on his bad side without even meeting him. But I didn't really want to meet him to find out if he liked me or not. I'd pretty much like to stay out of all of the Cullen's way, except for Alice's.

The bell rang about decades later and, ignoring Mike's comments about something or other, I bolted out the door. This infatuation with Alice was weird, but I couldn't bring myself to care at the moment. All I could think about was the fact that she'd freakin' hugged me. I was actually the first to class and Mr. Ibarra smiled at me as I took my seat. I returned it as a few other students filed in. As the kids came in, I focused intently on my notes. Or at least I pretended to. How creepy would it be if she walked in and I was just staring at her, like I'd been waiting for her? I knew that would freak me out so I kept my eyes on my notebook. The tardy bell rang a few minutes later and I looked towards the door, dejected. She hadn't come. Maybe she'd skipped this period. Huffing almost too loudly, I straightened in my seat, only to come face to face with the smaller girl.

"Hi," Alice chirped from her chair. I did a double take before my eyes narrowed like Charlie's had this morning.

"How did you get here without me noticing?" I asked, closing my notebook. Alice shrugged innocently.

"You were very absorbed in your notes. And I came through that other door." She gestured towards another entrance at the far right side of the room.

"But…you were so quiet?"

"Is there something wrong with being quiet?"

"No! I mean, of course not, it's just…that's really quiet."

"Well, if you prefer, next time I'll be sure to make a great big ruckus so you can noticed my presence." Her eyes were shining with help from the near window and she smiled calmly at her. And I felt at ease. Alice was my own personal dope. And I was an addict. I'd never been addicted to anyone like this. Of course I'd read the clichés in many a romance novel but I'd always thought that was just to spice up the novel. Nope. Here it was. Here she was, and I wanted more.

"T-that'd be good," I stuttered, managing a relaxed smile. Alice appeared to be on the verge of returning my grin but before she could, her eyes glazed over and she stood frozen in front of me. At first I panicked, but the more I watched the more I noticed that she was very much in control. Holy shit, she was possessed. And I wasn't Catholic. Just as I was about to scream for a bible, Alice came to, shaking her head and giving me an odd look from her peripherals. "Are you okay?" I whispered to avoid disturbing Mr. Ibarra, who'd just turned off the lights for notes. Alice shook her head vigorously in a nod.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine thank you. I just…do that sometimes."

"And…that's normal?"

"Very. Everyone here is used to it. Sorry if I scared you." The shine left her eyes and I felt myself growing melancholy just looking at them. They looked darker. But then again, the room was darker since the lights were off.

"I've never met someone who spoke so much with their eyes like you do," I blurted out. Dammit, dammit, dammit. My fists clenched in anger and I felt the blood radiating all over my body. Surely I looked like a giant tomato. I couldn't believe I'd just said that. I had inner monologue and it worked just fine…most of the time. Alice stared at me for a moment, a tiny crease formed in her brow at her confusion. Then she laughed and looked away shyly for a moment.

"You know, that's the most original compliment I've heard in a long time," she said. "I haven't heard that one. Thank you."

"Uh…welcome?"

"Don't be embarrassed, Bella. You get embarrassed much too easily. Your cheeks are positively fuming. Here, I'll help. My hands are freezing."

Luckily I kept my, 'I know,' from slipping out as she reached out and placed her frigid hands on my cheeks. I shivered and quickly felt my cheeks cooling. It was refreshing and during this time I noted the softness of her fingers on my skin. They were smooth but very firm, like granite or marble. Alice lifted her hands and turned to scribble the notes down. I followed her motions and tried to catch up with Mr. Ibarra's lecture. Nothing was said for the rest of the period. Mr. Ibarra finished his lesson rather quickly and gave us the last few minutes to talk or get started on the homework. I kept working, finding some difficulty in a certain problem. I'd worked it seven times and still got the wrong answer. I grumbled to myself and pushed the paper away angrily. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Alice's frail hand grab the sheet and pull it closer. I watched her eyes as they darted across the paper. I liked doing that for some reason, watching people's eyes as they read. It was a good time killer. "You're using cosine," she said finally, pushing the paper back to me. "You need to use sine."

"Oh, thanks," I answered as I worked the problem again. The answer was correct, of course and I sighed with finality as I put the paper in my notebook.

"So, Bella, what are you doing for lunch?" Alice asked as I got my bag together. I looked up at her. Her head was tilted to the side just a bit and she was looking at me curiously. I felt my heart sinking just a bit as I answered her.

"I'm afraid I'm eating with Mike Newton and his group." Alice's face fell just like I thought it would but before she could tell me it was okay I spoke up again. "Why don't you join me?" The pixie's eyes narrowed and she looked down at the table, contemplating. Her fingers were drumming lightly on her collarbone.

"Are they going to mind?" she asked?

"No, not at all. Please come and sit with us."

"Oh, well since you're twisting my arm," Alice laughed, straightening in her chair. Before I could respond, the bell rang and everyone was bolting for the door. Alice and I waited for the crowd to clear from the room before we took off down the hall. We walked side by side at a friendly pace. It didn't seem all that strange. I was strangely comfortable around Alice and while it was different from what I expected, I wasn't going to argue it. However, as we walked, I noticed a bunch of kids giving us rather strange looks. I glared back at them for a moment before Alice laughed and looped her arm through mine. "They're just curious," she stated as we turned a corner. "My family and I aren't really that social. This is a new thing for me." I thought about this for a moment and right as we entered the cafeteria I gathered the nerve to ask the question.

"So…why me, then?"

"Oh, there they are. Let's go sit." Alice ignored my question and instead sprightly dragged me over to my current lunch table of choice. They didn't really notice us until Alice stopped just behind Jessica. Mike's half eaten sandwich fell out of his mouth as Angela smiled kindly. Realizing it was time for me to speak, I cleared my throat.

"Uh, guys, this is Alice. Is it okay if she sits with us today?"

"Sure," Angela said as Jessica turned around. Like Mike, her mouth had also fallen open. Thankfully, there was no food in his mouth. I grinned at Angela and sat down across from her as Alice sat next to her.

"Hello, Angela, Mike, Eric, Jessica," Alice said politely as she nodded to each one of them. They all nodded in return and mumbled some sort of answer. All the while I began to think that maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I didn't know this group all that well. Maybe I was pushing my boundaries. Maybe there was something of a grudge I didn't know about. There was a sort of strange tension from my friends towards Alice and I didn't like it.

"So, why did you decide to eat with us?" Jessica questioned as politely as she could muster (which wasn't very much.) Alice ran her tongue across her bottom lip and shrugged.

"Bella asked me to,"

"That's it?"

"Should there be any more to it?"

"I…guess not. It's just, you guys always sit together."

"No one's asked us to sit with them before."

"You haven't asked anyone to sit with you guys."

"Touché,"

Jessica half glared at Alice who only smiled in return. Both of the boys were just staring at Alice, most likely mesmerized like I had been at her beauty and charm. Thank god for Angela. "Oh hush, Jessica, Alice is being nothing but polite. You could return the favor." All eyes focused on Angela as she shrugged and nodded, furthering her point. I couldn't help it. I burst into laughter at Angela's words and Alice soon followed. The table then joined and Jessica started to fume. However, just as she opened her mouth to say something, a violent whistle pierced the cafeteria. A few girls screamed at the noise and most people cringed, me included. Alice, however, just turned and glared. I followed her eyes and noticed the rest of her family staring back at her with that same cold look. Rosalie jerked her head to the side quickly, hinting at Alice to come over. I saw Alice shake her head and Rosalie's hand clenched on the table. She made the head gesture again and Alice sighed, standing.

"I'm so sorry, Bella, everyone. My sister's terribly rude. It was nice getting better acquainted. Enjoy your lunch." Alice's eyes met mine and I saw the dejectedness in them. "Sorry," she mouthed again before turning and heading over to the Cullen table. As soon as she got there all of them stood and headed out the door. Rosalie was the last one out and as she gripped the door, her eyes met mine. I felt my blood turn cold as she glared and shook her head slowly. Then she left, letting the door slam behind her.

"What the hell was that?" Mike asked me.

"Good question,"


	4. Chapter 4

Apparition

Alice didn't return for the rest of the day. I knew that because I'd spent any spare time I had searching for her. But she was nowhere to be found and neither were her siblings. All of them had just disappeared from sight. They were so mysterious. And I'd be a liar if I said it didn't intrigue the hell out of me. They were all gorgeous, pale and just from my experiences from Alice I'd be willing to bet that they were cold and hard as well. Hard, cold, pale, hot. Kate Moss. In spite of myself, I snickered out loud in my last class. A few people glanced over but I quickly went back to my work and they thought nothing of it. I always liked art. I wasn't very good at but I always enjoyed it. We were working with clay now. The one good thing about a small school is that they pack everything they can into classes. So this art class was also ceramics and jewelry. I couldn't complain; I liked ceramics.

My hands were running smoothly over the clay on my pottery wheel. I wasn't really making anything, just toying with the shapes my hands created. Up and down, smooth and ridged, it was so calming. Smiling to myself I imagined that scene from the movie Ghost with that song. God, what was that song? I hummed it softly as I tried to remember while the scenes from the movie replayed in my head. I loved that movie. And it was for damn certain that that scene was hot. In spite of myself, I closed my eyes and thought about someone coming up behind me, threading their fingers through mine and helping me with my project. I looked down and pictured white, petit fingers surrounding mine. They were only slightly cold due to the warmness of the clay. The hands were travelling up my wrists now, leaving trails along the way. The bell rang to dismiss my last class and I sighed as my imagination faded. And the song still had not come to me. I sighed again, feeling overall disappointed with this ceramics class, and lazily washed my hands. I didn't even have the will to get all of the clay off. I still enjoyed the texture on my hands so I left a little there and headed out to my truck.

The halls were empty quickly as I didn't have a last period and most people were still in their classes. I smiled softly as I travelled through the quiet school. It was refreshing, calming. I looked over at the cafeteria as I passed and thought about Alice…again. Why she looked so uncomfortable when she left, why Rosalie was looking oh so pissed, why Edward just sat there and glared at me. As if it weren't obvious I wasn't feeling very welcomed by the Cullens. They might as well kill me now. However, on the bright side, Alice appeared to want a friendship from me and I couldn't deny that idea was reciprocated by me.

As I headed to my car I dug into my book bag for my keys. Of course, my book bag was a bottomless pit and my keys were deciding to hide from me. I groaned to myself as I kept walking and digging. When I'd finally found them and wrapped my hand around them, I felt a hand on my shoulder, stopping me. Looking up, I realized that I was one step away from slamming into my own car. Smooth. I looked down at the pale fingers on my shoulder and smiled. "Hi, Alice,"

"Good afternoon, Bella. You really should watch where you're going. Don't want you getting hurt." She smiled softly at me and I couldn't help but return it. She was so cute. Alice gave a short exhale of a laugh and then became serious. "Listen, Bella, I wanted to apologize for my sister's and my behavior at lunch. It was quite inexcusable. She was very rude and I shouldn't have gone with her. Do you forgive me?" Her eyes widened with hope as she waited for my answer. Like I wasn't going to forgive her. It wasn't even her fault that her sister had done that at lunch. She was so compassionate, this girl.

"Oh sure, Alice, no problem. Don't blame yourself. There's nothing to be sorry for."

"Great, thanks!" she said as she enveloped me in a hug. A tight hug. In fact, it was hurting a little. Alice sighed softly into my shoulder as she hugged me and while I tried to remain quiet about it, my breathing hitched with pain. Alice released me instantly, her eyes widened in horror. Then she gasped and hung her head. If I hadn't been intently focusing on her, I wouldn't have heard her whisper, "I…hurt you. I'm so sorry." Honestly it felt like a little bit of me was dying inside. Alice looked like she was about to cry and I'd caused that torment in her. Stupid me for being weak. I shouldn't have made a sound. I didn't mind the pain, I just wanted the hug. I placed my hand on Alice's shoulder and she raised her head.

"Alice, don't worry about it. You're way too hard on yourself." She smiled just a bit but I could tell she wasn't buying it. "Seriously, Alice, you're like…" I paused, searching for the right things to say that wouldn't make me sound like a total idiot. "You're one of the coolest people I've ever met. Why are you so hard on yourself?" To my surprise, my lame lines worked and she laughed quietly, placing her frigid hand on mine. Luckily, I managed not to flinch at it.

"I'm not usually so self-conscious I just…I want you to like me. Does that sound stupid?"

"Not at all," I laughed. "I want you to like me too."

"That's great!" She seemed extremely happy for a moment before her face fell a bit again. She was so hard to read at this point that I had no idea what was going on. So I decided to try my best to ease the tension.

"So, um, I was going to go shopping at the grocery store. Did…do you want to come with me?"

"You want me to go with you?"

"Yes, if you'd like to."

"Yeah, that sounds fun!" she chirped before running over to the other side of the car. I laughed a bit as I unlocked the door and looked around the parking lot. The Volvo and the Jeep didn't appear to be anywhere in the parking lot. They wouldn't have left Alice here, would they? Maybe she had her own car. Or maybe she was planning on coming with me all along. I climbed in quickly and reached over to unlock Alice's side. She thanked me and lifted herself up more gracefully than I'd ever seen. I turned the truck on and watched as Alice's eyes widened with glee at the sound. She was so vivacious. It was definitely refreshing.

"So, where's your family?" I asked as casually as I could muster.

"Oh, they all left early today."

"Why didn't you?"

"Because I had to see you and apologize, remember?"

"Well, yes, but what about after. If I hadn't offered you to come with me what would you have done?"

Alice smiled mischievously. "Well, I thought surely you'd offer me a ride." She laughed softly and I blushed. Alice's laughing stopped and she looked over at me. Her eyes were focused on my reddened cheeks and I watched as she swiped her tongue across her bottom lip. "May I open the window? I'm afraid I'm a bit hot," she asked, her hand on the lever.

'Yeah right,' I thought, remembering her chilled skin, but nodded anyway. The window was down in an instant and Alice sighed as she stuck her head out for a moment, returning with her face and hair wet with rain. She shook it out and wiped her face with her sleeve.

"You'd think I was on menopause or something with all of the hot flashes I get. I'm either freezing or burning up, go figure," she laughed. I returned it and focused on the road. We ended up getting caught at one of the three lights in all of Forks and this one just happened to be the longest. Alice stayed quiet so I thought it best to do the same. To pass the time I kept singing that song from Ghost in my head, unable to come up with the details again. Alice looked over at me, her brow furrowed as she studied my expression. "What are you thinking about?" she asked almost hesitantly. I jerked my head over at her, embarrassed that she'd caught me.

"Oh, nothing. It's stupid."

"Still, what was it?"

"I was just thinking about a song,"

"What song?"

"A song from a movie."

"Bella, are you familiar with what humans call a conversation?"

I looked over at her, expecting her to be angry, only to see that she was grinning at me. I laughed back and ran my hand through my hair. "Sorry, it's just lame. I was thinking about that movie, Ghost, and I can't remember that famous song from it." Alice nodded and opened her mouth, singing the song I was thinking of in my head. Crap, she could sing too? Granted, it was really, really high pitched but it was pretty. I was starting to feel like an utter failure at life. "Yeah, that's the one."

"The Righteous Brothers… Unchained Melody,"

"Righteous Brothers," I muttered under my breath as it had been on the tip of my tongue for so long. Alice giggled and hummed the song for a little longer as the light finally changed.

"Do you like that movie?" she asked casually as I found a parking spot.

"Who doesn't like that movie?" I returned, glancing over at her for her reaction. She blinked and nodded understandingly.

"So, how do you feel about the supernatural then?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, do you believe in the supernatural? Ghosts, zombies, vampires oh my?"

I shrugged contemplatively. "I guess I believe until they prove 100% that none of those exist. However I would think we notice zombies and vampires walking around, don't you think?"

"Zombies, perhaps. I mean, they'd be kind of hard to miss," Alice laughed.

"Yeah they'd be all…dead and such." I laughed. "This is a strange topic."

"Strange bad or strange good?"

"Strange good,"

"Good." Alice winked at me and hopped out of the truck. I followed her quickly, grabbing my money from my book bag. Alice walked through the revolving doors and picked up a hand basket before standing and waiting for me. I picked up a basket as well, unsure of how much I was going to need and led the way down the aisles. I decided that enchiladas would be a good meal for this evening. Charlie had always liked Mexican food and they were easy enough to make. And until I could get some more money, I'd just grab a few snacks to keep me alive for the time being. The first aisle we went to was canned food so I could get some canned corn and refried beans.

"So, is there any particular reason for this shopping adventure?" Alice asked as she looked questioningly at the can of corn. I shrugged, taking the can from her and putting it in my basket. She rolled her eyes playfully at me and simply grabbed another can of beets to study.

"My father's been a bachelor for awhile so he lives strictly off of American cheese slices and Pabst Blue Ribbon. I thought it'd be nice to make him a home cooked meal while also getting some sustenance for myself."

"Men can live entirely off of beer and cheese?"

"So it would seem. That's all that's in his refrigerator. Of course, he also mentioned eating out a lot. "

"Do you prefer eating out or in?"

"It depends. I usually like eating in, I guess. It's much more personal. Plus, I don't like being waited on."

Alice looked up at me as I turned the aisle. I heard her put the can up and soon she was next to me again. We were in the chips aisle now and as I searched for a good hot sauce Alice had picked up a jar of green chili. "Why don't you like being waited on?" she asked as she read the contents. I looked over at her. She looked absolutely enamored with the food. It was as if she had no idea what the mechanics of food were. I then noticed her slender wrist and my eyes traveled to her extremely petit figure. Though I didn't want it to, anorexia popped into mind as I studied her. It would explain most of the strange things about her. Her pale skin, bags under the eyes. I didn't know anything about the hardness or coldness being associated with it however. Alice looked up at me and I realized that I had yet to give her an answer.

"Oh, sorry. I don't know. I just feel like an inconvenience to the waiters."

"But…isn't it their job to wait on people?"

"Well yeah but…I don't know. I just don't like it."

Alice giggled and put the jar back up. "You're very entertaining, Bella Swan."

"Entertaining good or entertaining bad?"

"Good…very good,"

I dropped the hot sauce in the basket and looked over at her again. She gave me a look that I didn't quite understand. Okay, I understood it; I just didn't know what to think of it. She was flirting with me. And, I didn't know how flirt. I mean, honestly, no one had ever flirted with me before. Not to be conceited, but I always thought I was pretty okay looking. Definitely not a super model but I didn't think I was bag head worthy either. Guys or girls just never seemed interested in me. And who could blame them? I was a shy, standoffish and let's not forget clumsy teenager. I was more trouble than I was worth. So, instead of retorting with some equally cute comment, I just laughed sheepishly like a six year old and took to stare intently at the chips. Alice made some kind of noise that I couldn't interpret because I didn't see her face and picked up another jar. After I'd calmed down, I looked over at Alice again. She was so petit. And though she looked fitting for her size, I still couldn't help but wonder. The few friends I did have in Phoenix were extremely normal; we had no drama in terms of eating disorders, sex or drugs. So if this girl happened to have anorexia, I would probably end up being an ass of a friend. I didn't like drama. I avoided it. Therefore, I couldn't handle it. And now, here she was.

"Um, Bella?"

I looked up quickly into Alice's dark eyes. She was staring at me inquisitively. Oh snap, I'd been caught checking her out. "Is something wrong?" she asked as she looked down at her clothes and straightened her blouse. I shook my head quickly. Too quickly…she didn't believe me. "No, really," she asked again. What could I do? Nothing would make sense other than the truth. Oh well, making an ass out of myself seemed to be my god-given talent.

"I just…you're so petit…" I began slowly, looking at the food in my basket. "And the way you've been studying the food I just…I don't know." There it was, the best I could muster. Hopefully she could catch my drift. Much to my surprise, she smiled and shook her head.

"You think I have an eating disorder, don't you?"

I didn't have an answer to that. Well, I did, but I didn't want to say it. I felt ashamed and embarrassed. I'd never been so mortified in my life. I felt like I'd just cursed in front of the Pope or something. I couldn't imagine just how much I'd offended this poor girl who'd been nothing but perfect to me. My cheeks were burning and my hands were shaking a bit. I looked down at them as Alice placed her hands over mine, soothing them. "Calm down, Bella. Honestly, do you think I haven't heard that notion before? It's quite believable. It'd be pretty rude for me to get angry over it." She looked up at me and I can only imagine what my expression must have looked like for she looked almost worried for me. "You poor thing, calm down!" She smiled. "You're poor cheeks are going to fry off." She placed her hands on my cheeks again and I shivered from her touch.

"I have an overactive metabolism. I'm on medication for it. And with all of the health stuff going on I just like to read the labels of food. My father's a doctor, Bella. I doubt he'd be the type to stand for an eating disorder, don't you think?"

"Y-yeah, that makes sense. I'm sorry,"

"Please don't apologize. There's nothing to apologize for."

"Okay,"

"Thank you. So, what are you going to make tonight?" she asked as she removed her hands.

"Um, I was thinking enchiladas. I've got all of the stuff I need. Are you ready to go? Do you need something?"

"Nope, ready when you are, boss." I laughed, thoroughly calmed now, and began to walk towards the cashier. Alice looped her arm through mine again as we walked. It was nothing more than friendly and while I normally didn't like touchy people, Alice was definitely an exception. I didn't feel like such a freak when she was around. And as the new girl in town, I needed that.

Alice helped me carry the three bags to the truck and then hopped up into the passenger seat again. "So, am I taking you home?" I asked.

"If you don't mind. It's a bit out of town so I understand if you don't want to take me," she answered, to which I told her it was not a problem. She smiled over at me. "Thanks. I'll give you directions. Just take a right down this road and stay on it for awhile." I nodded and turned onto the road.

"So, your dad is a doctor?" I asked after we'd driven in silence for a while. Alice nodded, a smile gracing her features as she thought of him.

"Yes, Carlisle…he's such a wonderful man. I mean, to adopt me like he did when I was so much older than the other children. I'm so lucky."

"Wow, it sounds like you guys get along great."

"We really do. How about your family? May I ask? Oh and you'll make a left up here."

"Sure, it's only fair. I get along really well with my mom, Renee. But she met this guy, Phil, who's a minor league baseball player. And he's a pretty nice guy but he travels a lot because of his profession. My mother always wanted to go with him but she had to stay home with me when he left. So, I figured I'd already had almost two decades with her; the least I can do is go and live with my father for awhile. And Charlie means well."

"Wow, how altruistic of you."

"I'd hardly call it altruistic."

Alice glanced over at me with a puzzling expression on her face. "You actually know what 'altruistic' means?"

"Yes?"

"That's so refreshing." She smiled and relaxed back into the seat before pointing up ahead. "It's the white house on the left up there. I followed her finger and looked up to an enormous house sitting on a hill. It was gorgeous, forest colored and covered with windows. The design looked to be modern but the more I stared at it the more I thought it was probably restored. Either way, it was beautiful and the Cullens were loaded. Of course, all doctors were loaded so that wasn't all that hard to believe.

"Wow," I muttered as Alice gathered her things and stepped out. She sighed and looked up at the house.

"Big house, isn't it? I find it a tad ostentatious but I'd be lying if I said I didn't call it home."

"You're more of a country cottage kind of girl?"

"Country cottage, quaint beach house, something of the sort." She smiled up at me.

"I could see that," I replied, running a hand through my hair. Alice nodded but continued to rest on the seat. I could tell that neither of us really wanted to leave. But I had to make dinner. Alice sighed and stood reluctantly.

"Anyway, thanks so much, Bella, for the ride and your time."

"No problem, Alice, anytime."

"I just might take you up on that."

Alice and I smiled at each other one last time before I heard a door slam. We both turned to see the blonde, Rosalie, standing on the front porch with her arms crossed? Her eyes were fixated on me and I thought I heard Alice make a growling sound. Now, I was never a fighter but I was getting pretty sick and tired of this chick glaring at me. "What's her problem with me?" I asked Alice. The blonde's eyebrows rose as Alice chuckled.

"Perpetual PMS. She's not mad at you, she's mad at me. Don't worry about her. I'll see you tomorrow, Bella, okay?" Before I could answer she slammed the door and grudgingly walked up the path to where Rosalie awaited her.

"Bitch," I muttered to myself, looking back at the blonde. It looked like she caught my glance again but I didn't care. I just shifted gears and pulled out of the driveway. I wasn't a fan of Rosalie, I decided. She was incredibly rude and…well that's all there needs to be isn't there? I felt like she was the single driving force behind whatever's been trying to sever my friendship with Alice. The drive home was too quiet with Alice out of the truck. I didn't like it so much but I felt like I needed the silence. I needed to calm down and assess my life. It was all happening too fast. This new town, new school, new friends, Alice and the Cullens all around were too much. Ultimately, I decided to ignore all of that now and think about Charlie's dinner. I had bought all of the fixings for enchiladas, some soda and some chips and hot sauce. That should be efficient for a few days.

I headed into the house and directly to the kitchen. There I focused solely on the Mexican dish at hand. It was nice to be cooking again, therapeutic almost. It was sure distracting and relaxing. While the food simmered I sat at the kitchen table and worked on some homework. Physics was a no-go for obvious reasons so I went ahead then finished my English paper. It was probably a B. I could deal with a B. As I was putting the enchiladas onto a dish, the phone rang. Attempting to manage a shoulder maneuver I continued to move the enchiladas as I spoke.

"Hello?"

"Bella? It's mom! Why haven't you called? I've been so anxious to hear from you!"

"Oh, hey, Mom…I'm sorry, things have been pretty busy here. I'm still adjusting so I haven't had much time."

"Oh, of course, honey I understand. So how's the school? Friends, boys?"

"Plenty of boys, and I've made a few friends. Look, mom, I'm cooking dinner. Can I call you back tomorrow?" I heard my mother sigh into the phone and couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"I guess, honey. Just as long as you actually call me back."

"I will. Love you, bye."

"Love you, bye"

I hung up the phone eagerly and set the plate on the table just as Charlie arrived home. He stepped in the door and stopped, lifting his nose in the air. "Wow, Bells? You made that smell? It smells awesome."

"Thanks, Dad. It's all ready when you are."

Charlie nodded and put his jacket and belt up before heading over to the table. He took four enchiladas while I stuck with two. We ate in silence for a bit other than Charlie's compliments over the meal. When he'd devoured his third, he cleaned his chin on his napkin and looked up at me. "So, did anything change at school today?"

I nodded, lowering my face to conceal my smile. "Yeah Alice Cullen and I are better. She's very nice. I guess you were right. We got off on the wrong foot."

Charlie smiled and took another bite. "That's good, Bella. I'm glad. They're a nice family that bunch. Though I'd be okay if you didn't meet Dr. Cullen at his place of business. Are you still a little…" He drifted, waving his fork from side to side,

"Clumsy?" I answered for him. "Yeah...always have been and always will I suppose."

"Oh well…that's always been part of your charm, I thought."

"Thanks, Dad."

Charlie winked at me and complimented my dinner again before we went back to eating. Afterwards he even cleaned up. I sat at the table, pretending to do my homework, and watched him. He really was a good dad. I was starting to feel sad that I'd wasted so much of my childhood without him. After dinner I retired to bed. Today had taken a lot out of me for some reason. Probably all of the time I'd spent with Alice and the time I'd spent trying not to think about Alice. It was quite a work out let me tell you. After slipping into an overly large shirt, I climbed into bed and went to sleep easily.

My eyes shot open during the middle of the night. However, otherwise I didn't move. My face was buried in my pillow. Someone was in my room, I could sense it. And for some reason they hadn't sensed me. I carefully felt for my heartbeat. It was normal…and my breathing was even. That was bizarre. I should have been flipping shit. The stranger was at the foot of my bed. I could hear slow, even breaths. I couldn't take it anymore. As quickly as I could, I shot up in bed.

She was standing there.

Alice Cullen was standing at the foot of my bed. I opened my mouth to ask an obvious question but before I could utter a sound, she was gone. My blinds were ruffling and I specifically remembered the window being shut. Alice was in my room. She'd seen me and I'd seen her. Tomorrow was sure going to be interesting.


	5. Chapter 5

News

Alice had come later than last time. Apparently she didn't have a stalking schedule. I shivered as I stared at the spot on the floor again. I was sitting upright in my bed, cross-legged and leaning over to study the floor of my room. It was 5:25 in the morning. Charlie could have been up by now. I myself could have been up by now. Why would she choose to risk that and come over? Being so early Alice must have known that I was probably not in my deepest sleep. Why was she coming anyway? Was I some wonderfully intoxicating being that Alice simply could stop being around? I snorted at that thought. 'Yeah right,' I thought to myself. 'That's a riot, Bella, dear. Here she is stalking your weak ass and you're complimenting yourself.' I followed that thought with one final chuckle and ran my hands through my hair. It felt greasy. Oh yeah, shower, hygiene. I glanced at the clock. It was now 5:27. I still had time for a shower before school. Still sort of living out of my suitcase – I hadn't really found the drive to unpack it yet- I headed over to it and grabbed my shampoo and conditioner before heading out the door.

The water heated quickly enough and I welcomed the sting as I entered the shower, turning my back to it and allowing it to wash over my dirtied hair. I sighed, feeling better and more awake already, and grabbed the bar of soap in the dish. It was an Irish Spring brand. Men's soap. I groaned but couldn't really find the will to be angry or annoyed. I'd just smell like a hunky man for the day. I lathered, rinsed, repeated and did the same with my hair products. Then came the fun part: shaving. I was always a little wary of this part. Being a klutz, I hadn't really become good friends with this guy. But he made my legs shiny and smooth so I just had to deal with his bullshit now and again. Just as I was finishing my first leg, something rattled the blurred window inside of the shower. I looked up to see a figure behind it, staring at me. In spite of myself, I screamed bloody murder, my razor jerking back to catch a clean swipe at my side. The figure moved and I lost my balance, my knees falling back over the side of the tub, taking me and the shower curtain with them. As I was falling backwards, the figure stood, stretched its languid, four-legged figure and hopped off of the windowsill outside. I landed painfully on my backside, crying out again as my side was stretched out.

I heard a crash on the other side of the door. Then another and another before Charlie finally burst through the locked door. I looked up at him and gasped, trying to cover myself. But he'd already turned away, grabbing a towel and closing his eyes as he used it to help me up. I was grateful for it and took it quickly to wrap myself. "Christ almighty, Bella, are you okay?" Charlie fretted, turning around to examine the scene of a ripped shower curtain, water stains all over the wall and the shower still running furiously. He brushed past me over to it, turning it off. As he did so, he noticed to light drops of diluted red running with the water and down the drain. "You bleeding?" he asked, out of breath.

"Let me look," I answered, turning my back to him and opening my towel. Charlie groaned, clearly not wanting to be here and I could see from my peripherals that he also turned his back to me. I looked down at my side and noticed a razor cut that resulted from my panic. It really wasn't deep, but it was long and bleeding just a bit. "I'm fine," I answered finally, closing the towel and turning to face my father. He glanced my way then turned around also, looking around again.

"So, did you tell me what happened?" The poor man was so clearly flustered. I blushed, ashamed at my actions. I didn't like to see Charlie worry. It didn't seem like his thing.

"I-I…the window... I thought I saw someone staring at me through the window."

"Did you?" Charlie's voice was threatening now, police-like.

"No, it was a cat. I'm sorry for this. I'll clean it up and get you another curtain."

"You don't have to do that, Bells. Accidents happen. Tell you the truth I probably would have jumped Jiminy Crickets also. I'm just glad you're okay…" He let the sentence linger and I inferred the question in his tone.

"Yes, dad, I'm fine. Thanks for busting through the door like you did. It was cool."

Charlie laughed and nodded, looking at the shower. "I'll have all this fixed by the time you come home from school. And, uh, sorry about the soap. I'll fix that, too. What do you like?"

"Oh, any generic brand will do. Thanks, Dad."

"No problem, Bells. I'll see you downstairs."

I watched him go almost reluctantly. The fatherless child within me longed to reach out and embrace him. I'd spent a lot of childhood without him and now, a few months away from being an adult, I was starting to realize what a mistake that had been. I closed my eyes, remembering my eleven year old self yelling at my mother not to go. Everyone at school had parental issues. I wanted one, too. Then and there I'd decided that my father was to be out of the picture. That way I'd have something to contribute at lunch with the friends I so desperately wanted. My cheeks reddened in shame and I wondered what my father must have thought when he received that call from Renee, telling him that I wasn't coming. I didn't want to come.

In spite of myself, tears filled my eyes. I'd been such a cruel, stupid kid. And this was really not the time to delve into all of these emotions. I wiped my eyes angrily. Most kids were just waking up and here I was having a physical and mental breakdown. I scoffed into the room and stepped towards the mirror, hissing as I took my first step. My butt really hurt. The mirror being defogged, I slid the towel down again to examine myself. I could already see the purple tint of a bruise forming all around my backside. The backs of my knees were also bruising. I cursed out loud at the cat that had been on the windowsill and folded back the towel and began brushing my hair. It was then that the image of Alice popped back into my head.

Realization hit then. Despite my freak out, I knew that it was Alice that had been staring at me in the shower before the cat revealed itself. I knew without a shadow of a doubt and, in that moment, I felt violated. Who did she think she was? She couldn't just sit there and disregard my privacy for her own kicks. I felt myself going angry at the stalker whom I used to be flattered by. I can't believe I was okay with her stalking me. It was weird and it was wrong. She was weird and wrong. Tears filled my eyes again. Frustration this time, at the pain in my butt and knees and the disgust I felt with myself. I felt like a slut for just brushing off Alice. Just because she was beautiful I'd allowed her into my home to watch me as I slept. Granted, I didn't really allow her but I knew about it and did nothing to stop it. I finished with my hair and angrily threw the brush down on the sink. Utterly repulsed with the bathroom, I stomped out, ignoring the pain. Today was really not looking good.

In an attempt to make it better I sifted through my bag for my favorite shirt. It was gray with a quirky design on it. It was plain, casual and comfortable. It was also not here. I could have sworn that I packed it and yet the shirt was not in my damn bag. Upset, I lifted my large suitcase and tipped it over, dumping the contents onto the floor. It still was not there. I must have forgotten it in Arizona. Deciding it best just to drop it, I grabbed another shirt and threw it over it my head. It was yellow with a picture of a jellybean on it. I hated jellybeans. I finished dressing in a daze, well aware of the foul mood I was in, and headed downstairs where Charlie was eating breakfast. He looked up at me as if to wish me good morning but my face must have told him that was a bad idea because he just shrugged and went back to his meal. I was grateful for that. I really didn't want to lose it with my father today. He didn't deserve it. I looked around the kitchen seeing the cereal but not much else and ultimately decided that I wasn't hungry.

"I'm going to go ahead and go to school, Dad. I'll see you later," I said as kindly as I could muster as I reached for my bag.

"Sure, Bella, have a good day," he answered innocently. I nodded and headed out the door. Once I was out of Charlie's sight the anger came back. I was angry at Alice. Mostly because I didn't want to be angry at her. She had the makings of being a great friend and I didn't want to ruin that. I didn't want her to ruin that. But she was. I couldn't have her crashing my room at night. It made me feel like she really didn't care. Like she really didn't want me as a friend. That thought stung a little bit and I didn't really know how to handle it. Though I was never popular in school, I was also never bullied or made fun of. People just tended not to bother with me. So, the thought that someone was intentionally being cruel to me was not pleasing.

I hopped into the truck and sighed as it roared to life, relaxing a bit at the sound. I would confront her. I just had to confront her. I'd be nice about it, of course, but I had to know what was going on. My mind became a flurry thing, addressing every little thing I had noticed with the pixie. Her paleness, coldness, hardness, quickness…all other 'nesses' - they had to be addressed. The girl was not normal. And while it wasn't a problem, an explanation seemed necessary. And while I was at it, she also needed to apologize. Apologize for everything. I had never felt so pathetic. I'd never considered myself a rock or anything, but I definitely wasn't one to take all of this. The comical thought, 'I ain't nobody's bitch,' raced through my head and I couldn't help but giggle. Feeling just a bit better, I pulled into the parking lot and waited for the bell to ring. I noticed the burgundy jeep was already here but empty. They must have already gone inside. In fact, I may have been later than I thought. Just as I looked down at my watch, I heard the bell ring. I shut off the truck, grabbed my bag and raced inside, narrowly missing the tardy bell into English.

Mike was waiting for me, as usual, and waved eagerly as I walked in. I waved back, mentally telling myself to calm down. Even if Mike was not my favorite person in the world, he also did not deserve my bad mood. "Hey, Bella, what's up?" he asked as I sat down, wincing at the stiffness of my knees.

"Oh, nothing."

"Are you in pain or something?"

"Yes, why?"

"I could just…tell. Pull a muscle? I pulled my calf muscle last year in basketball. It hurt like hell!" He laughed then and I really couldn't tell why he was. However, I did answer his question.

"I fell in the shower this morning."

"Ouch. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, thanks. However I am in a really bad mood. So if you don't want to feel the wrath of Bella Swan, you should turn around." My tone had made the line humorous and Mike understood that. But he also took the hint and turned around, still chuckling. The rest of the class was uncomfortable. With the entirety of my ass bruised, I really couldn't find a comfortable position in the chair. This day really wasn't starting out all that well. Luckily, my focus on my chair had caused the class to fly by and the bell rang in what seemed like minutes. Mike looked back at me, testing my bad mood before he spoke and I took the opportunity to ask if the teacher gave homework.

"No, but the paper's due tomorrow," Mike answered. "Well, feel better, Bella. I'll see you at lunch." He then winked and walked out the door. My eyebrows rose as I watched him go. The boy could take a hint…who would have thought? Maybe he wasn't such a bad guy after all.

I walked slowly to physics. Because of the pain and because I really didn't want to go. It seemed easier to just ignore it. Easier, but not better. I sighed as I reached the door of the classroom and headed in. Alice wasn't there. But that really didn't mean anything yet. Alice normally sleuthed herself on in the seat next to me without my knowledge. Not caring if she caught me this time, I stared at both of the doors, waiting for her to come in. The tardy bell rang and I huffed loudly before thinking that maybe she could just be behind me, waiting to scare me as I turned around. Slowly, I glanced over my shoulder. She wasn't there either. Dammit. Now I was really in a foul mood.

She was never here. She was always off doing her own thing. I stopped there. I was being too hard on Alice. She might just be sick. God today sucked. Physics dragged on for forever and Pre-calc was just the same. Angela was skilled at taking hints also and never made a peep to me all class period. Or maybe she did and I just didn't hear her. I was too absorbed. Everything that I had sort of blown off in my Cullen stupor was now coming back in full force around my head. Alice Cullen, when looked at objectively, was weird. Honestly, mega thin, super short, pale, cold…her mannerisms in physics. She was not normal. And while I wasn't being shallow, I couldn't help but wonder why I hadn't noticed or cared about all of it before. Perhaps I was too distracted by how pretty Alice was. Maybe I was just happy to have someone notice me, to have a friend. Who knew?

Someone tapped me on the shoulder and I grudgingly looked up at them. Angela, looking slightly worried, nudged her head towards the door. I looked around and noticed that everyone was gone or leaving. The bell must have rung. I thanked Angela quietly and she nodded with a small smile before leaving me on my own. I couldn't blame her. I was being completely rude. But at the time I just didn't care. As soon as I felt better, I'd make it up to my friends. I was the last one out of the classroom and just as I'd stepped out of the door, I felt a hand on my shoulder, pulling me to the side. I felt the strength of the fingers on me and for a moment my spirits lifted, thinking that it was Alice. However, when I turned around, blonde curls came into view. Shit.

"Hi," the girl known as Rosalie said. Her eyes were hard but she appeared to be straining to look pleasant. I'll be honest it threw me off a bit. Was she trying to be nice or was she forced by someone to be nice? Well, regardless, before she lost this strange nice streak I thought it best to answer her.

"Hi,"

"I'm Rosalie…Alice's sister."

"I'm Bella and I kind of noticed." Crap. Of course this ice bitch would come to talk to me when I'm in a bad mood. I couldn't catch a break today. Rosalie's eyes narrowed before she rolled them and let go of my shoulder.

"Anyway, I'm here because Alice sent me to talk to you. She's sick today, as I'm sure you've noticed." Rosalie exhaled deeply and looked down the hall. She appeared uncomfortable but not because she was talking to me. It was more like she was uncomfortable thinking of Alice. Maybe she was really sick. I watched as her eyes filled with a sort of angered sympathy. When she finally looked at me again she was glaring and this time I could tell she was faking her bitchness. She spoke again and the tone of her voice let me know that she was quoting what she'd been told to say. "Alice has…some problems. I don't know if you've picked up on any of them or not but she's really not fit to be having too many friends. And while she really, really likes you as a friend, it's best that you stop hanging out. She wishes that it could be different but it's simply not in the cards. She understands if you're angry at her and she deserves it." Rosalie finished, fluttered her eyelids and looked at me for some sort of response. What could I say?

"What kind of problems?" I asked.

"If you were meant to know I would have told you," Rosalie said, biting my head off. I blushed and she scoffed, looking away and rubbing her nose. I decided to ignore it though. I was well within my rights to ask about my ex-friend. Rosalie's comment about 'problems' were swimming so strongly through my mind I couldn't get another thought out edgewise.

"But, she is okay, right?" This time Rosalie looked at me and I watched as her eyes studied mine intently. Then the strain around them softened and she nodded, looking much calmer.

"Yeah, she's fine. Don't worry about that."

Feeling a little bit better, I nodded, watching as Rosalie did the same. "Look," she began again, "I know that it's weird and hard for you to understand. But it's for the best…for both of you."

"I'll work on it," I mumbled, my mouth feeling dry. Rosalie looked me up and down again and opened her mouth to say something else. But she changed her mind, closed her mouth and instead headed down the hall where I saw her boyfriend, Emmett, waiting. I watched her go and returned the smile that Emmett gave me before they walked away. Then I sighed and headed down to the cafeteria. By backside had gotten worse over the course of the day and as I walked into the cafeteria and saw all of the chairs, I realized I really didn't want to be there. Eric was waving me over from the usual table on the left and the Cullens were staring at me from the right. My cheeks were in a permanent state of blush, my bruises hurt and my mind was not in the correct state for high school lunch. So, I politely waved back to my table, shot a glance at the Cullens and turned to head out onto the lawn.

It was cold outside and wet. I welcomed it. I welcomed it because it was fresh and open and quiet. It soothed me deeply and I exhaled slowly, watching my breath mist into more dew. Alice didn't want to be friends with me. Simple as that. It was simple and I didn't understand it. What kind of problems did the girl have? Dozens of thoughts ran through my head: preconceived notions of anorexia, bulimia, mental disorders, bad habits, possession…anything. They were all plausible but really didn't seem to fit. Why did I care? Alice didn't care anymore apparently, so why should I? I bit my bottom lip and looked out into the woods. It was so gorgeous, so different from the flat desert I knew. I'd never really had a best friend before. Alice was on her way to becoming my one true friend and took it away. I was ashamed to admit it to myself but it hurt. Rejection hurt.

"What are you thinking about?"

I turned around quickly to see yet another Cullen standing behind me. This one was Edward. His crazy hair really made him stand out from the crowd. I looked him up and down for a minute. He was attractive, but I'd gotten used to it with the Cullens in town. He was staring at me with that glare again. I really hated that glare and wasn't in the mood for it.

"Wondering what you're doing here," I answered coldly, watching as he tilted his head just a bit to the side.

"You're thinking about Alice."

"No shit, Sherlock."

"You don't have to be rude. I'm just having a conversation with you."

I sighed. I didn't have to be rude. But this guy had horrible timing. "I'm sorry. But I'd like to be alone now please."

"Why?"

"None of your business."

"It's about my sister. It is my business."

I scoffed at him then, growing angrier as I watched him appear to enjoy it. "Look, Edward, please leave me alone."

"Why are you so hurt? You only knew her for a few days. I can help. I know how you're feeling."

"You just asked me why I was hurt. You really don't know how I'm feeling." Who was this idiot and why did he look so fascinated with me? I didn't like it. I felt like he was the one watching me from the foot of my bed and felt slightly sick to my summer. He continued to stare before he took a few steps toward me, his gaze growing to a glare.

"Why doesn't it work with you?" He suddenly shouted, grabbing my shoulders. I wrenched myself out of his grasp and slapped him across the face. It felt like I'd slapped a rock…and it hurt. But who did this guy think he was? Edward appeared stunned and I took the opportunity to leave, dashing through the cafeteria and out to the parking lot where I got into my truck and headed home. I'd had enough of the Cullens for one day.


	6. Chapter 6

Dream

It was about one o'clock by the time I finally got home. I drove slowly watching my knuckles whiten as I gripped the steering wheel. There was such a strange mix of emotions swelling within me at that moment. I was feeling desperately alone at the fact that my one real friend had just broken up with me, so to speak. Pissed off because Edward I'm-too-sexy-for-my-plastic surgeon Cullen had the audacity to confront and get physical with me. And now, the most prominent feeling was sadness. Yes it was lame and yes it was cliché but dammit I was sad. Alice didn't want to be my friend even though she stalked me in the evenings at the foot of my bed and there was no one else here save for my awkward and taciturn father that I could talk to. Thinking about my father reminded me of calling my mother back and I threw my eyes to the roof of my truck with a groan. Loved her to death, but I really didn't want to speak to my mother at the moment. She would freak out about me, talk about herself, ask about my love life, and talk about herself and so on.

But, sometimes you had to do things you just didn't want to do. Thus was my situation and that was why I slammed my car door just a little too roughly after I climbed out. Charlie's cruiser was gone and it was a little too late for him to come home for lunch so it appeared I was in the clear. I put the key in the door and, after working with it for a minute, it swung open swiftly.

I stood in the doorway for a moment, listening. Honestly, I could not be blamed for being a little bit paranoid so I felt no shame as I kept an ear open and stepped into the house, closing the door behind me. Again it was quiet. While I didn't feel a presence in the house, that really didn't mean shit. Alice was as silent as a mouse. It was honestly a wonder I'd woken up those few times to her. I couldn't recall her making a sound that would have woken me up. She was like a fox or something. Was it a fox? I couldn't remember the simile but basically she was sneaky. That was my original point.

Thoroughly satisfied that I was alone, I set my bag on top of the dining room table and headed into the kitchen. Skipping my already late lunch at school mixed with all of the drama at school had really made me hungry so I found the leftover enchiladas and put one into the microwave. I stared at the phone while it heated up, judging if my emotional stability was stable enough to call my mother. The microwave had beeped long before I made my decision but I ultimately ended up picking up the phone and calling my mother's cell phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey, mom, it's me."

"…Who?"

"Your daughter, Bella,"

"There must be some mistake. You can't be my daughter, Bella."

"Why not?"

"Because my daughter, Bella, would never call me back like she said she would."

I half-chuckled into the receiver. "Well, miracles do happen. How are you, mom? How's the travelling going?"

"Oh, it's been going great, Bella! Phil is just tickled to death. But enough about me, how about you? Have you met any friends, boyfriends? How's school?"

"School's fine," I answered automatically, twisting the phone cord around my finger lamely. "I mean, it's a small town so there's really nothing to talk about. I met a few friends and, you know I guess I'm in a group of some sort."

"That's great, honey! Found a bestie yet?"

"Mom, don't say bestie. And I had one, but she kind of pulled a 180."

"Well then she doesn't deserve your friendship. Don't worry, Bella and don't let things like that get you down."

"Yeah, Mom, thanks," I answered as I rolled my eyes. Honestly, what did my mother know about this type of friendship? This was no ordinary, 'let's sleep over' friendship. This was a 'let me make you so paranoid that your father has to save you from a shower' type of friendship. Her intentions were good, but I really couldn't use her advice. She was right about Alice not deserving my friendship; however I chose to ignore that little piece of information. Logically thinking, I knew that while Alice and I had a couple of really good moments, her constant absences and strange behavior were quite overwhelming. And we'd only been' friends' for about two days so for me to be acting like I'd lost my 'bestie' was a little overdramatic even for me. But, despite all of this logic, I knew that I'd drop any concern or suspicion if she so much as looked my way. Because that was what she did. She charmed me into forgetting about logic or reality. Yes it was lame and quite hard to believe but until Alice Cullen walks into your bedroom in the middle of the night I suggest you don't judge.

By the time I'd finally hung up with my mother my enchilada had to be reheated again. Though she'd taken up quite a bit of my time with useless knowledge I had to admit that I felt relieved after talking with my mother. Now the task could be put off for a few days to allow me to focus on more important things.

I ate in silence while I worked on my calculus homework, halfway leaning off of the chair to accommodate my bruise, and actually managed to finish my food and the homework at the same time. And, I had put only three grease stains on the entire paper from my Mexican food. Quite the feat indeed. Trying to stay on a roll, I pulled out my Physics work and started on that. I was about halfway into the worksheet before it dawned on me: today was Friday. I threw my pencil down quickly and shoved my weekend homework back into my bag. I could deal with it on Sunday. It probably wasn't the best idea in the world to come to a new town on Tuesday and start a new school on Wednesday but the flights were cheaper on Tuesday and I couldn't complain with my mother about it.

Wait, Friday night…something was happening tonight. Out of habit I snapped my fingers as it came to me. Charlie and I were heading to the Reservation tonight. I groaned loudly and made a face. I really didn't want to meet new people tonight. Granted, Jacob and Billy weren't exactly new but they were foreign enough that the visit would be awkward. The only bright side of the evening would be that I would be spending some time with my neglected father. I couldn't deny that I was somewhat happy about that. I looked at the clock again. It was 3:30 now and because I had no final period, I would have already been home. My day of truancy hadn't turned out to be that bad…not that I hoped to do it again. I smiled softly to myself and grabbed my bag, heading upstairs. On the way to my room I passed the bathroom and noticed that Charlie had indeed fixed the shower curtain and some Dove body wash was sitting on the edge of the tub. "Good choice, Charlie," I muttered truthfully as I made my way to my room.

Just as I sat my bag on the chair beside my desk the phone rang. I didn't have one in my bedroom but Charlie had one in his so I raced across the hall to his room, narrowly dodging some possibly dirty boxers on the way. Luckily, I made it on the second ring. "Hello?"

"Bells," Charlie half-shouted into the phone, "are you okay?"

"Uh, yeah, dad, I'm fine. Why?"

"Because I just got a call from the school saying you missed your last periods."

"Oh," I answered, slapping my hand to my face. I'd forgotten about that tiny detail. Well, the truth never hurt. "I left, Dad. I really wasn't feeling well and it had been a horrible day. I just couldn't stick it out. I'm sorry." I heard Charlie give a heavy sigh into the phone and I bit nervously down on my lip. Maybe he would ground me and I wouldn't have to go to the Reservation.

"Well, Bella, I can't say I'm all that happy with you. I mean, yeah I was a student once too but I always called when I left early. You scared the hell out me. I didn't know what to think or what happened to you."

"I'm sorry, Dad," I repeated, genuinely feeling low. He sighed again.

"It's fine. I'm just glad you're okay. I'll let the school know. Are you feeling well enough to go to the Reservation tonight? The guys have been dying to see you."

"No, I'm fine. I'm feeling much better." Charlie was being way too cool for me to fake a sickness on him.

"Great! So, I'll be home at around five-thirty and we'll over there at about six. I'll even be the cool dad and let you follow in your truck just in case you want to leave early."

I laughed into the receiver. "Yeah, dad, that does make you pretty cool."

"See you soon, Bells,"

"Bye,"

I hung up with Charlie feeling rather satisfied. Taking my mind off of school and certain persons at said school was really helping. That night, I made a promise to myself not to think about them once this evening and to try and enjoy myself. I just hoped I could keep it. To pass the time until it was time to leave I unpacked my luggage and put up all of my clothes. Then I stood in front of the closet doors and debated on what to wear. It was always a tougher decision in the closet than in the bag. Finally I had decided on a navy shirt with some kind of writing on it and my favorite pair of jeans. My favorite shirt was still missing and while that angered me, there was nothing I could do about it now. Just as I was lacing up my final shoe, I heard the sound of the cruiser in the driveway.

When Charlie arrived right on time, he suggested that I bring a jacket as rain was imminent and it could get cold on the beach. I really didn't have much of anything that was between my light windbreaker and my winter coat so I went for the windbreaker, hoping that it wouldn't get that cold. When I got back downstairs Charlie had changed into some casual wear and I realized that this was the first time I'd seen him out of uniform. He looked okay, for being my dad and all. He looked skeptically at my jacket but eventually shrugged and opened the door for me. "It's almost a straight drive, Bells. You'll know the way like the back of your hand after this one lesson," he said as he locked the door behind him.

"Oh, okay," I answered, not really sure why I would need to know the route to the Reservation.

"Jacob's a good kid. I figure if you guys get to being friends then you'll need to know the way to his house. Plus, it's just nice to know your way around in this wooded area," Charlie answered for me as he unlocked his car. I nodded and got into mine, laughing as Charlie jumped at the loud starting noise it made.

As Charlie had said, the drive to the Reservation was pretty easy. It was only about fifteen minutes away and after taking a left at the one stoplight in Forks you stayed on the road until you took a right at the entrance to the Reservation. A snap, basically. While following the cruiser through the Reservation I studied the place. It was so…poor. I felt bad for thinking that but it was the truth. This place was so poor and downtrodden and the people that I'd seen had sunken in, wrinkled faces, worn with years and years of work. They looked up at my Chevy sadly and I felt bad for having it. I'd once read somewhere that suicide rates among Native Americans were huge. Now I could see why. Then we got further into the Reservation and I saw more and more families. Parents were sitting on the porch while children played in the front yards, making mud pies and having mud wars. I smiled as I watched them. Maybe this place wasn't as bad as I originally thought.

Billy Black's house was away from all of the others, nestled behind a wooded area. It was a wooden cabin of sorts that was painted the same color of red as my truck. Though the paint was chipping the cabin itself looked to be kept up quite well. There was a barn to the far right of the house and if I squinted I could make out a car sitting in it. As I stepped out of the truck, the cold humidity hit me along with the salty smell of the shore. My ears also picked up on the waves crashing against the rocky coastline. I glanced over at the small grove of trees and noticed a little dirt path leading through it. The ocean couldn't have been just a few yards away. I stared at it for a few moments more before following Charlie up to the house. The door opened just as we'd climbed the last step and out came Billy Black. He was in a wheelchair; I had remembered that much. And he was smiling from ear to ear. He had long dark hair, a sort of squashed nose and squinty brown eyes. Wrinkles lined every inch of his cheerful face and I couldn't help but smile back at this sweet old man.

"Took you long enough to get here, old man!" Billy joked, extending his hand to Charlie, who shook it.

"I'm right on time. You're just too old to see the clock," Charlie returned before motioning to me. "Billy, you remember Bella." Billy turned his head to me and his features softened just a bit. He looked a little shocked and I assumed that he was surprised at how much I'd grown. I smiled to him and extended my hand, which he took in both of his.

"You did well, Charlie," he said, winking at my father. "Nice to see you again, Bella. Please, come in." With that, he let go of my hand and turned the wheelchair around and rolled into the house. Charlie motioned for me to go first and I reluctantly obliged. The front door led to a small hallway. To the right of the hallway was what looked like a bedroom and to the left there was the living room. The kitchen was directly across from the living room and the hall extended further to three more doors that I could only guess was a closet, another bedroom and a bathroom. It was very small, but also very quaint and warm. This was a place where I could imagine spending Christmas morning. It also smelled fantastic. Sort of like leather and cedar and fire.

"Jacob!" Billy called, jolting me out of my daze. "They're here, Jake! Get out of that room!" Billy then smiled and motioned for Charlie and me to sit. He winked at me as I sat down and whispered, "That boy's been in there all day trying to find the right outfit to wear for this occasion." Charlie chuckled beside me and I blushed. Was I being set up on a blind date or something? In the few short moments of spare time I had I tried to remember anything I could of Jacob Black. We were so young. I just remember him being tan with dark hair. He smiled a lot and we generally had a good time together. But that was all I had. I heard a door open down the hall and footsteps following. Charlie stood and I thought it best to do the same.

Jacob Black rounded the corner, messing with the cuffs of a black shirt he had put on. He also had dark jeans on and a pair of Doc Marten looking boots. He had jet black hair that hung down in one straight sheet just past his shoulders. His nose was squashed like Billy's but not as badly and he sort of had a large forehead. The hair helped though, framing his defined jaw nicely. All in all he was a really good looking guy. He smiled and looked back and forth from Charlie and me. "Hi, I'm Jacob. I don't know if you remember but-

"Oh, I do. It's good to see you again, Jacob," I answered, also smiling. His eyes brightened and he laughed awkwardly before telling us to sit down again. Billy called from the kitchen to say that dinner was almost ready. Charlie rose from the couch and went into the kitchen, leaving me alone with Jacob.

"So, Bella, how do you like Forks so far?" Jacob asked, sitting in a chair across from the couch with his hands clasped. I shrugged, listening to the two grown men argue playfully in the kitchen.

"It's okay. I haven't really had all that much time to experience it."

"Yeah, I hear that. Made any friends?"

"A couple…Mike Newton, Angela Webber, their group."

"Oh I know them. They're pretty nice. They come down to surf La Push often."

"And, Alice Cullen has been pretty nice to me." Dammit, broke my promise. If I knew I was going to break it before I made it, does it still count as broken? Probably. Jacob's eyes narrowed a bit and I watched as he peered into the kitchen, which had grown quiet. Then, a sort of disagreement arose in the kitchen as Jacob rolled his eyes and scoffed. Obviously, this piqued my interest.

"Is there something wrong with Alice Cullen?" I asked as innocently as I could.

"No, there's nothing wrong with Alice Cullen or any of the Cullens," Jacob answered, enunciating each word as if he were speaking to someone with a handicap. "My father just doesn't like them so he wants everyone to dislike them as well. It's really nice." He rolled his eyes again and I smiled.

"So, why doesn't he like them?"

"I don't know. He says they're just different. It's pretty hypocritical if you ask me. He just sticks to legends." I nodded but before I could pry more, Billy called us for dinner. As we sat at the table, I noticed that Charlie and Billy, if they had been arguing before, were completely fine, laughing easily and having a good time. With their impression, it didn't take long for me to follow along and soon we were all having a great time. I'd even learned that it was from them that Charlie bought my truck and spent a good fifteen minutes talking with Jacob about how it ran and how much I loved it. After the meal, Charlie and Billy wanted to check the scores of some game and Jacob offered to walk me to the ocean.

"Is that the only jacket you brought?" he asked as he closed the front door behind us. I nodded and he gave me the same skeptical look that Charlie gave me but smiled and jumped off of the steps. I followed without jumping and he led us down the same dirt path I'd seen earlier. As we walked, I could hear with wind howling above us, blocked by the trees. I could also feel mist collecting on my cheek. But I wasn't cold yet.

"So, what's this legend you mentioned earlier?" I asked as I caught up with Jacob. He smiled at me and even in the dark I could see his white teeth.

"It's just some old Quileute legend. Long story short, we are descendents of wolves and battled with these things called 'the cold ones.' Vampires, if you couldn't gather. A typical werewolf meets vampire battle royal."

"It sounds like you stole that from 'Underworld.'"

"Or 'Underworld' stole it from us."

"You should sue them."

"I just might," he laughed. "I could really use the settlement money."

"Oh yeah? For what?"

"I'm working on a car and I could use some money for parts. Also, the only way I'll get into college is by some sort of miracle. Being Native American only gets me so far."

"That's pretty commendable of you, Jacob."

"Sure, sure," he answered, waving me off with his hands. I shrugged, sighing as we entered a clearing. Once we were out of the safety of the trees, the wind hit hard. I almost fell over from the force and began shivering uncontrollably. I heard Jacob laughing next to me and felt something fall over my shoulders: his jacket.

"I told you," he sneered as he kept walking.

"You told me nothing," I retaliated. "You just looked skeptical and laughed."

"Well, everyone's gotta learn sometime."

"Here, take your jacket back. Now you're cold."

Jacob shook his head and took it from my hands, placing it back around my shoulders. "I'm fine, really. We're warm blooded. Runs in the family." I scoffed but was too cold to argue and slipped my arms through the sleeves. It really was warm. "Here, take my hand," Jacob said. I hesitated for a moment and he chuckled.

"Come on, conceited. I want to show you something without you getting hurt." Blushing, I took his hand and he led the way in the darkness. We neared the edge of what I assumed was a cliff and I could hear the sounds of the waves getting louder and louder. "Alright, stop right here and look down," he said, his grip tightening on my hand. I did as I was told and looked down. Even in the darkness of the night I could see the beautiful white caps bursting against the charcoal rocks. The sea and land looked as if they were in battle and I couldn't seem to look away.

"Nice, isn't it?" Jacob asked and I could feel him looking at me.

"It's gorgeous," I answered, looking up at him. "Thank you."

"No problem." He smiled again and I returned it as a faint whistle came through the trees. Jacob sighed. "It's my dad. I guess you guys are leaving."

"I guess so,"

"Feel free to stop by any time though. It's pretty fun down here."

"Yeah that sounds great."

Jacob smiled again and led the way back through the trees where Charlie and Billy were waiting on the front porch. We said our goodbyes there and Charlie led the way back home. "So, did you have a good time?" Charlie asked as he hung up his jacket.

"Yeah, I really did. Thanks for taking me, dad."

"No problem, Bells. Now that you know the way I bet you'll be up there all of the time. Speaking of, I'm going fishing up there tomorrow with Billy. I'll leave their number if you need me."

"Alright, dad," I said, giving him a quick round the shoulder hug. "Night,"

"Night, Bella."

I smiled once more to him and danced up the stairs to my room, tripping only once as I did so. The trip to the La Push Reservation was just what I needed. I found a normal friend with normal things to talk about. It seemed like things were finally looking up. As I made it to my room, I noticed that my suitcase was still lying on the floor. As I bent over to zip it up and stow it somewhere, I noticed something in my bag. I lifted the flap carefully and looked inside.

It was my favorite shirt, lying at the bottom of my suitcase. My breath caught in my throat as I quickly turned around, making sure no one was behind me. My room was empty. Cautiously I picked up the shirt, looking for some kind of note or something to be attached to it. There was none, but something was amiss. I slowly brought the shirt to my face and inhaled. There it was. The scent. The scent that was better than anything that could be created. The scent of Alice Cullen. I sighed, removing the shirt from my face and looked around again. I even laid down on the carpet and looked under my bed. She was not here, but my shirt was back. Feeling a little more than weirded out I jogged to my window and locked the latch. Then I ran to the other one and locked it as well. My door didn't have a lock but I wasn't too worried about it. Still extremely uneasy, I changed into my favorite shirt to sleep in and was lulled to sleep by sweet smell of Alice.

0-0-0-0-0

She was here again. I knew she was here. I could feel her presence in my room. My heart was racing but I kept my eyes shut. She shuffled her feet and I could feel her light steps on the carpet, moving towards the front of my bed, towards me. She stopped once she reached the top, and I exhaled sharply, knowing that she would soon run away if I gave too many warnings. But she didn't. Instead, I felt her ice cold hand on my temple, pushing my hair out of my face. Her hand lingered on my skin and travelled down the base of my neck and all the way down my arm, resting finally on my hand. My heart was beating even faster and my breathing was uneven. And yet she stayed. She knew I was awake and didn't care. I didn't know how to feel about that. Suddenly, I felt her breath on my ear, cool and inviting. She did nothing more but breathe for a few moments before I felt her lips on my neck. It wasn't even a kiss. It was as if she just placed them there, testing my skin. Her lips were moving now up the column of my neck and I swallowed hard, fighting the urge to open my eyes.

Even her lips were freezing and I involuntarily shivered as they found their way to my earlobe. My mind was a flurry of thoughts but the one that was most prominent in my mind kept ringing over and over in my buzzing ears. 'What are you?' Her lips were then taken from my skin and I exhaled again, my skin tingling as the warmer air hit them. I asked the question in my mind again, only to feel her breath on my ear once more.

"Vampire," she whispered in tone so heavy it could have been cut with a knife. I couldn't take it anymore then. I opened my eyes. There she was, standing over me, smiling with her eyes as dark as the night. She smiled at me, and I saw a glimpse of fangs. I blushed at the sight. Then her eyes narrowed as her smile turned into a snarl. Before I could react, she leapt upon me.

I shot up in bed screaming. Then I clenched my eyes tightly. The ill-seen sun was berating its way through my windows. I blinked a few more times and opened my eyes, staring at the clock. It was past nine o'clock. With my heart still racing, I felt my neck and ear. It was warm. I jumped out of bed and ran over to the windows. It was locked.

For the first time, Alice had not shown up. And yet I dreamed her here anyway. Closing my eyes, I laid back on the bed and tried to think about the word she'd uttered so seductively in my ear.

"Vampire."


	7. Chapter 7

Enigma

My fingers drummed angrily against the wall behind me as I stared up at my ceiling. It was almost ten now and I had yet to leave my bed. A part of me was being lazy while another part of me was fearful that if I put my feet on the ground a vampire would attack my heels from under the bed. Vampire. Yes, the word was rolling off of my thoughts easily now. The dream had been so real and while it was just a figment of my imagination, it had confirmed what I'd wanted to believe all along. Alice was a vampire.

Show me the way to the loony bin. "Urgh," I groaned aloud, throwing myself upright so quickly that it made me dizzy. I knew it was stupid. I knew it was farfetched. But it was the only thing that was making sense, the only thing that was connecting all of the tricky dots Alice possessed. My mind had been swirling between encounters with the girl and Jacob's legend trying to make sure that I wasn't forgetting anything. Of course, Jacob had given me the abridged version of the legend so I didn't have much to go on except my vague memory of the Underworld films. I closed my eyes for a moment, listening downstairs for any movement. There was none which led me to believe that Charlie had already left for the Reservation. For a brief moment I contemplated heading down there as well and asking for more information on these 'cold ones.' But soon after that I disregarded it. That seemed a little bit too forward for me after just having been there last night.

Well, no matter what I decided to do I was going to have to get out of bed sooner or later. Childish as it was, I threw my upper half over the side of the bed and cautiously lifted up the dust ruffle. There was nothing there. Of course there wasn't. Alice was too cool to hide under a bed. She was more the type to hide right behind me. The idea sent chills down my back. As quickly as I could muster I turned around. She wasn't there either. I glanced at the closed closet door for just a brief moment before looking away and shaking my head. I groaned. I was getting pretty tired of these games. Most likely Alice was not here but back in her coffin sleeping.

I grimaced at that joke and took it back in my mind. Even though she had some stalker issues, I was getting a little rude. I chuckled. She could stalk me, but I couldn't make jokes about her. Looney bin again, I ask? It's not like it mattered all that much. Nothing made much sense these days. Briefly I thought of my home in Phoenix. Things seemed so much easier there in that big, hot city. Everything moved at its own pace and just flowed together well. I never really recalled worrying much about things. Now, in this lonely little town I didn't know fiction from non and friends from bloodsuckers. My back was getting stiff from lying in bed so I sat up and dared my feet to touch the carpet. Nothing happened just as I predicted. After stretching a bit I stood and walked around, feeling the bones in my feet pop as they were worked out.

I wanted to dig some dirt today. Not literally of course but I wanted to find more information on vampires and the legends of the Quileute's. I glanced over at the decrepit computer in the corner of my room. Charlie had mentioned having one a long time ago but by the looks of the thing I didn't have too much faith in it. Being a generation Y teen, I didn't think I could handle the dial-up internet so I threw that plan out the window. If it was Saturday then the local library was probably open. Yes, the library! And they must have at least one computer. Finally, a plan that might work. Smiling to myself I headed for the door. As I passed the closet I gave it one final look.

"If you're in there, Alice, come down and join me for breakfast," I half joked. Then I headed down the steps without waiting for a response from the door. Breakfast was plain again but also nice. It felt good to sit in the silent kitchen and just mull things over for a bit. I thought about the group of friends that I'd blown off over the course of the week. It was pretty rude of me. I wasn't really in a position to lose the new and only friends I had. I'd come up with an excuse for Monday and hope they believed me. I thought about Rosalie and the strange expression she held while talking about Alice. Being an only child, I obviously knew nothing about having a sister. But the look she possessed didn't seem all that much like sisterly concern. It was just…I couldn't place it. And what the hell was with that Edward guy? I did absolutely nothing to him. I reminisced of the rude way he grabbed my arms and suddenly became angry. I wouldn't call myself a feminist but I wasn't going to be an ignorant moron. In fact, I wasn't going to waste my time thinking about him.

Dropping Edward brought me to my last major thought: Alice's complete 180. That just seemed off. And she didn't even have very good reasoning for it. Sure, being a vampire thirsting after my blood was a good reason but honestly…. I shut my eyes, taking a bite of cereal. I was really trying my hardest to dismiss the vampire theory. It was nothing but an immature waste of time…no matter how much it made sense. Well, whatever was wrong with her, I sure wasn't going to find out sitting in the kitchen in my pajamas. So I stood and put my dishes in the sink before heading back upstairs. I passed the shower on the way to my room and stopped in front of it, deciding if I needed a shower today. Slowly, I passed my hand over my backside. It was still pretty tender although the backs of my knees hadn't been giving me trouble. I ran my hand slowly through my hair and discovered that it wasn't greasy and sniffed my arm. It still had the faintest hint of Irish Springs. I didn't need a shower today, thank god. Truth be told I was still a little wary of the damn thing. But it was no matter now.

I went into my room and changed my clothes, deciding to keep wearing my favorite shirt as it still had the smallest sample of Alice on it. Not to mention that it was proving to be quite the talisman or whatever against nightly visitors. Perhaps it was my lucky shirt as well. I finished getting ready and ran a brush through my hair before I thought I looked well enough to head out into public. On the way to the truck I was hit with the realization that I didn't really know where the library was. I knew that they had one because my father used to take me there when I visited long ago. Oh well, this town had about six blocks in its entirety; I'm sure I could find it.

And I did. It sat just a few blocks behind the high school. It was a short but long building that took up about half of a block. The buildings next to it were actually homes. It was a strange design that this town had. They seemed to just improvise everything. I frowned at the size of the building. It looked much bigger when I was five but now I was beginning to wonder whether they would have any of the information I was looking for or even a computer. But, it was worth a shot. I hopped out of the truck and slipped on the concrete. Luckily, the only damage that was done was to my pride as I caught myself on my beast of a truck. Shaking it off, I headed inside.

Two double doors led the way into the library and as I entered I saw that the information desk was straight ahead while the library broke out on either side of it. To the right looked like the children's section and I smiled as I remembered sitting on the little chairs, looking at pictures of books and trying desperately to read the words. To the left was the more adult section and as I walked closer I saw about six computers arranged against the wall. Victory! There didn't appear to be anyone at the information desk so I headed over to the sign in sheets on the computer. In fact, there didn't seem to be anyone here at all. For a minute I wondered if I'd just walked into a closed library. That seemed a bit farfetched given that the doors did open for me. But being in a library all alone, closed or not gave me an uncomfortable feeling of aloneness. After some precarious leaning, however, I finally noted a few library patrons and didn't feel so alone.

I grimaced at my handwriting as I wrote my name and the date down. It hadn't gotten any better since I berated it after seeing Alice's. Not that I'd been trying all that hard to perfect it. Sighing, I headed over to a computer and shook the mouse, turning it on. I pulled up the most convenient search engine and typed in 'vampire characteristics.' I blushed as the page loaded and looked over my shoulder. It felt awkward to be searching something so…preteen. I felt like one of those sad little gothic kids that had to believe in vampires simply to feel loved or something. But, hell, I already believed that there was an entire family of them at school so why not let the world know that Bella Swan was an epic douche bag with a vampire fetish. Yeah, that sounded catchy. The page loaded mere seconds later and after a brief contemplation, I forced myself to forget about my pride.

All of the pages I searched at the same generic characteristics of vampires. Pale, cold, hard, no reflection, fangs…it all seemed so unbelievable. Who was I kidding? It was unbelievable. I laughed softly to myself. Clearly this humidity had gotten to my head. And yet, I still hadn't convinced myself to turn away. I thought for sure the humidity comment would have sent me packing but no. No, I had yet to look up Jacob's legend. Looking behind me one last time, I searched the Quileute legend. Surprisingly, there were hardly any results. Most of the links were to some books I could buy on the topic. Five pages into the topics the search engine had brought up and I still had no luck on the legend. All I had was the stupid book. So much for the internet. Still hopeful, I wrote down the name of the book and the author on my hand. Even though I was going to ask, I knew already by the size of this library that they weren't going to have this book. That would be too easy, right? Perhaps I could convince Charlie to allow me on a trip to Port Angeles by myself. Not quite as satisfied as I hoped to be, I signed off of the computer and headed to the information desk.

There still wasn't a soul behind it as I reached the desk but I did notice one of those little attention getting bells. I dinged it softly, blushing when the noise rang loudly in the quiet room. Not four seconds later, someone came out of a door that led to an office or something. It was Angela. "Hi, Bella," she said politely, though I could tell by her stance she was a bit wary of me. I couldn't say I could blame her; I'd been acting like a total freak lately.

"Hey, Angela, how are you?"

"I'm fine, thanks. Bored. How are you feeling? You seemed…not well on Friday."

I blushed, scratching the side of my neck. What was I supposed to really tell her? Well, honestly, I didn't have to tell her anything. It's not like she could understand that I was being stalked by Alice Cullen much less believe it. But I could apologize. I was good at that. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that, Angela. I was just…out of sorts all week. You know…all week…of the month." Her eyes widened for a brief moment before she nodded understandingly.

"Oh, I see. It's no problem. We were just concerned is all. And for the record, Jessica's much worse on hers. Just be thankful you haven't seen it yet." She smiled and I couldn't help but return it. Normal, pedestrian…normalcy was really what I needed right now. Thank god for Angela if I haven't already. Apparently I'd been pondering for too long because Angela looked around a bit for shaking the mouse on her own computer. "Is there something you were looking for?" she asked.

"Oh, right," I answered, shaking my head just a bit. "I was wondering if you had this book, Quileute Legends of the Northwest by this guy whose name I can't pronounce?" I tilted my hand so that Angela could read the name. She tried for a few moments to pronounce before we both laughed and dropped it. She entered it into the computer and tapped her fingers. Apparently there system was slow or at least down.

"From what our slow system is bringing up it looks fairly new. I don't think we're going to have it but I can search and see if any other places have it for you."

"Thanks,"

"Yep, just like I thought, we don't have it. However it does look like the branch in Port Angeles does. Do you want the address?"

"Yeah that'd be great. Thanks."

Angela smiled, nodding her head as she wrote the address down on a sticky note for me. "You know," she said as she handed it to me, "Jessica and I are heading out to Port Angeles tomorrow. All of the dress stores stay open Sunday just for the Forks teens to look at prom dresses. You're welcome to come with us."

"Isn't prom, like, at the end of the year?"

Angela smiled. "We're a small town, Bella. Don't squash our moments."

I laughed before making a nervous expression. "Would Jessica be okay with me coming?" Angela laughed again before waving her hand.

"Don't worry about Jessica. She likes you, she does. She just sees you as a threat."

"A threat to what?"

"Bella, come on. You're new and not a nerd or ugly. Think about it." Even Angela's tone hinted at jealously though it wasn't as obvious as Jessica's. I blushed and looked down. I'd never been the most wanted girl…ever. And I couldn't imagine why anyone would want to be. It didn't make me feel hot or anything of the sort. Rather, I felt like a slut. I didn't like it. "Eric's pretty fond of you," Angela mentioned after a short pause. I couldn't help it, I smiled. Cute and normal little Angela was crushing on Eric. Quite the 'aw' moment if I did say so myself. However, I refrained from awing and instead shook my head.

"Eric's not my type, Angela. In fact, I'm perfectly content with being single. So, if you see Jessica before I do, tell her not to worry, okay?" Angela studied my face for a moment as if to see if I was telling the truth or not. But eventually she smiled again and nodded. Just as I was about to engage in some friendly conversation, something to my right caught my eye. I glanced over and noticed a pale, short woman. Alice, of course. Angela was watching her too. Judging from her expression it would appear that Alice didn't come here often if at all. Her back was turned to us and Angela and I both looked at each other quizzically.

"It would appear that the Cullens have taken an interest in you," Angela whispered, still looking at Alice. "Everyone was noticing that you'd spoken to practically all of them already. Most of us haven't even managed a word."

"Well, let's see if I can manage more than a word today," I said before heading over to her. I was like a woman on a mission. In an instant I'd forgotten all about Angela, Port Angeles or even the book. All I cared about now was Alice, and getting her to talk to me. She noticed me when I was about three feet away and she gave me a fleeting glance before heading deeper into the aisle of books. I followed her almost on her heels. It wasn't until we'd gone into the farthest corner of the library that she stopped. It was so sudden that I almost ran into her. Thankfully I didn't, though I almost toppled backwards at the sudden action. She turned around and grasped me firmly on the shoulder, steadying me.

"You are the clumsiest thing," she said wistfully, almost as if she'd forgotten I was here. She stared at her hand on my shoulder for a moment, her grip slowly loosening. It wasn't until she'd completely let go of me and let her hand fall to the side that she rubbed her eyes and looked at me. "Rosalie gave you the message, I assume?" she said so quickly that it threw me off.

"Huh? I-uh- I mean, yeah she gave me the message. I just—

"And was there something unclear about it?"

"No, I just-

"Then why are you here?"

"If you would let me finish, I might have an answer for you," I snapped, surprised at my own confidence. Alice gave a short nod, refusing to meet my eyes. She looked…tired. Not that she didn't always look tired but today it appeared to really be taking a toll on her. I took a deep breath. I didn't actually think I'd get this far with Alice today. I thought that as soon as she saw me she'd sprint out the door. There were tons of things that I wanted to say. Why she was stalking me, why she took my shirt, why she was distancing herself from me. Why the hell she was doing all of this to me. But as I looked up at her, it just didn't seem like the right time to bring all of it up. She looked so tired and…sad. "I just…wanted to make sure that you were okay. Rosalie mentioned you had problems of some sort and while she assured me that you were fine…. I just wanted to hear it from you." I blushed, looking down at my feet. I could hear Alice sigh and forced myself to look up.

"I'm fine," she answered, though she appeared to be looking strained. "Thanks for your…concern."

I nodded and her eyes met mind for the first time. And I realized as she looked at me that I'd missed her. It had just been two and a half days, and yet I missed her. I sounded like a mega freak and I knew it but for the time being I just didn't care. She shifted from one foot to the other and looked towards the door. She was planning to make an escape. I didn't want her to. I couldn't. "Hey, a few friends are going up to Port Angeles tomorrow to look for prom dresses. Want to come?"

Her brow furrowed for a moment. "Are you…asking me to prom?"

"What? No!" I blushed again, shaking my head. "I'm asking you to Port Angeles."

In spite of the tense mood, Alice relaxed a bit and let out an embarrassed laugh. "Sorry, Bella, I misheard." Then her face fell again and she looked away. She was really forcing the negativity. I could tell it was hard for her not to engage with me. So why didn't she? This wasn't some cruel 'hard to get' thing was it? If it was…it was working. But I didn't like it.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I just can't. In fact, I need to go. Nice talking to you."

Before I could form some sort of response, she brushed past me and quickened pace out of the aisles. It was stupid to follow her, so I waited until I heard the doors open and shut before I walked out. It felt like the walk of shame. Even Angela was looking at me sympathetically as I came over to her. "How'd that go?" she asked as I stepped in front of the desk.

"Not well," I answered honestly. But at least I gave it a shot, right? Angela smiled and nodded.

"You've got guts, Bella, to talk to a Cullen. That's for sure." We laughed at that and after exchanging some information on the trip and some more small talk I headed back to the truck.

Angela had mentioned that Newton's Sporting Goods was hiring. I would have preferred a job at the library but they weren't hiring, as it was never busy enough to have more than three staff members. But a job was a job and boy did I need one. I found it easily after following Angela's directions. It wasn't very big but had a big, flashy sign that looked a little out of place in the quaint town. The woman at the front counter, while very nice, kept giving me strange looks. After a brief conversation I realized that apparently this was Mike Newton's mother and also apparently, he'd been talking about me. I couldn't help but feel just a bit smug about this one. At least I had a job nipped in the bud. Even though Ms. Newton (she gave me her first name but I didn't remember it) assured me that I had the job, I was still required to fill out an application. Deciding to give it to her tomorrow, I took it with me, vowing to do an excellent job on it so as not to seem to lackadaisical with getting a job.

From there I headed to the grocery store. We'd run low on food again and I ended up making the mistake of heading to the market with an empty stomach. It took all of the money Renee had given me but now I could stock the cabinets, refrigerator and pantry properly and we wouldn't run out in two days. By the time we'd have to go back, Charlie could either front the bill or I'd have my first paycheck so everything seemed to be working out. I headed home after that, eager to look at a fully stocked kitchen. Domestic goddess, huh?

It was about two and a half hours after I stocked the kitchen that Charlie returned. He was a bit dirty and the bottoms of his pants were soaking wet but the smile on his face was undeniable. "Hey, Bella! How was your day?" he asked excitedly, taking off his rain boots and putting up his things.

"It was fine," I answered, throwing the book I was reading on the coffee table and standing up to greet him. "It looks like you had fun." I gestured toward his smile and he nodded.

"I have a surprise for you, Bella. I'm cooking dinner tonight. You do like fish, don't you?"

"Yeah, of course. I went to the store today so you should have all the fixings."

"Oh you shouldn't have done that, Bells. I can do the grocery shopping. Did you spend your own money?"

"Yeah, but it was no problem."

"I'll pay you back then. But look at what I caught today!" He gestured towards his cooler and opened it, lifting quite a large fish from inside. I didn't know fish lingo but it looked to be a little over a foot and a half long and healthy looking and that worked for me; even though it was kind of gross to look at and I couldn't help but notice it was dripping on the floor.

"Wow, Dad that is a huge fish." His smile grew wider as he nodded approvingly at it.

"Yeah, and it's already gutted and everything. I'll fry it up for us. It won't be as good as Billy's but you know it can't be as good as Billy's."

I laughed, remembering the fish fry from the evening before. Charlie laughed as well and invited me into the kitchen to help on deciding and making a side dish or two. I chose a salad and potatoes after finding this nifty packet for mashed potatoes that only requires water at the store. While that was in the microwave I worked on cutting some vegetables for a salad. Charlie had breaded the fish, dusted them with a few seasonings he wouldn't tell me about and was now frying them in a pan. We made dinner silently and yet it was really pleasant. My father seemed so excited about his fish and it was just nice to see him so focused on it. It was nice to just see him.

Small talk finally formed around dinner after I told Charlie that his fish fry was better than Billy's. He denied it adamantly and we argued humorously for awhile. When he was almost finished I thought it best to bring up Port Angeles. "Hey, Dad, you know Angela Weber?"

"I know of her, yeah."

"Well, she invited me to Port Angeles with her tomorrow for the day. I was wondering if I could go?"

"When are you leaving?"

"At around ten I think. We're planning on having dinner there and I need to stop at the library."

"The library…have you tried the one we have here?"

"Yeah I went there today but they didn't have the book I'm looking for. Quileute Legends of the Northwest is the book. Have you heard of it?"

"No, I can't say I have. Well, I guess that's fine. And what time do you think you'll be home?"

"Angela said nine or ten at the latest."

"Sure, Bells, go and have a good time."

"Thanks, Dad! Cleanup is on me," I said as I rose from my chair to hug him again. He patted my arm and I took his plate to wash the dishes in complacency. For some reason, I thought that this book was going to have all of the answers. I thought that something in it would tell me exactly what Alice was, how to win her back as a friend and how to generally stop all of this mystery and drama. It wasn't my forte and I wanted to keep it that way. Thinking of this book with seemingly all of the answers was really calming my mind. I was so calm, in fact, that when I went to bed that night, I didn't bother locking my windows.

The first thing I noticed when I woke up was that I woke up to the alarm. I didn't wake up in the middle of the night nor did I wake up from a dream. I just woke up. Awesome! I smiled to myself as I bolted out of bed and headed to my closet. I felt like a woman reborn and I loved it. I wasn't paranoid or nervous or anything. I was just girl going on a road trip with my normal friends. It was…nice.

I got ready quickly, even working up enough confidence to take a shower, and headed downstairs for breakfast. Charlie was sitting in the kitchen as I entered, eating the leftover fish. I bid him good morning and he did the same. He was in the middle of a bite but appeared to be working it down quickly to say something. I poured myself a glass of milk and waited for him to speak. Finally he got it down and he stood, reaching into his wallet. "How much was the bill for the groceries yesterday, Bella?" I blushed, shaking my head.

"Oh, don't worry about it, Dad, I got it covered."

"How much was the bill?"

"Dad, really –

"Bells, the bill?" He was giving me a fatherly look, one that I hadn't seen yet. But even though I hadn't seen it before, I knew it was telling me to stop pushing it.

"About $175.00," I answered shortly, looking down. Charlie nodded and opened his wallet. I held out my hand as he offered it to me and saw that he'd given me two one hundred dollar bills. "Thanks, Dad," I said again, blushing. He nodded and gave me a soft smile.

"I know all about Port Angeles on Sundays. I hope that'll help you pick out a real pretty dress."

I smiled and hugged him. He returned it and I felt him jump as he pulled away, as if he remembered something. "Say, what was the title of that book you mentioned yesterday?" I told him and he smiled. "I've got another surprise then for you." He headed out into the living room and motioned for me to follow. He led me to an old bookshelf that sat kind of off to the side in the room. He picked up a brand new looking book and handed it to me. It was the novel I'd been searching for. I looked up at Charlie and he shrugged.

"I just saw it sitting there this morning when I was watching the weather. I guessed Jacob or Billy left it over here. They bring books over sometimes about legends. It's so I can tell good stories to the kids." He smiled and I returned it.

"Thanks, Dad! This saves me a trip to the library and money."

"Thought you'd like it, Bells. Now, go in there and get some breakfast before your friends get here."

I nodded and followed my father back into the kitchen. I was eager for breakfast, eager for this road trip, (even if it was dress shopping) and I was eager to finally solve this enigma that was Alice Cullen.


	8. Chapter 8

Dent

Jessica honked the car horn when I was about halfway to my house. With it being about ten o'clock in the evening, I turned around and shushed her loudly. She and Angela just laughed before speeding off in her little Toyota. I laughed along with them, watching as they drove rather quickly down the road. Jessica was a horrible driver. Though, I think she was more trying to show off. Show off what, I didn't know given that her car was quite literally a clunker. But no matter, I still had a great time. I turned slowly, noting the wet concrete beneath my flat shoes, and headed up the driveway. The bags were weighing down on my arms and I was getting tired of carrying them around. Despite the fact that we were dress shopping for prom in October, I actually bought one. It was only logical to do so, however. I mean, things in the 'romance' part of my life had gone from nonexistent to definitely maybe. I was almost certain that Mike would ask me to prom if not that one shaggy haired boy in my math class. So it was good to be prepared. To be honest, I thought the world would have ended by now. But it was staying put for the time being and I smiled to myself as I looked for the appropriate key.

Luckily though, Charlie opened the door before I had to worry about unlocking it. "Hey, Bella, right on time," he said as he allowed me through, taking the bags from my weary arms.

"Yep, toldya so," I answered, flopping myself on the couch. Charlie followed, sitting on the chair opposite me and setting the bags between his feet.

"How was Port Angeles?"

"It was really nice. Jessica and Angela can shop for hours but they were good company. And they helped me out with dresses and such. Then we ate at a local, quirky restaurant."

Charlie nodded, watching me. Then he grinned and picked up the bags at his feet. "So, this is a dress then. Can I see it?" I smiled at him but shook my head, standing up to take the bags from his hands.

"Sorry, dad, but I don't want to have to get these things out unless I have a date. So until then, you don't get to see it." Charlie frowned, flinging his hand lazily towards me.

"Aw, come on, Bells. You know you're going to have a date. Let me see it now so there's no suspense."

"Sorry, no can do, pops," I answered, hugging him quickly before bidding goodnight and racing up the stairs. I heard his faint chuckle and he wished me good night as well as I reached the top of the stairs. Shaking my head, I headed into my room and shut the door. Today had been fun. I'd forgotten what that was like. Not in a depressing way, but I just hadn't had real fun in a long time. Things had just been okay for awhile. But now, they were good. And if this book held true, things were about to get a lot better.

I took my time putting my things away and changing into my pajamas. For some reason, I enjoyed building suspense for myself. And, even if the book turned out to be a total waste, I knew I wouldn't be able to put it down until sleep made me. So it only made sense to get prepared for bed before I started. The dress put away, room neat and tidied and pajamas on, I was nearly done. I took a sideways towards my window. It was still locked from last night. I brought my hand to rest across my chest, tapping my fingers along my collarbone. My fingers tapped for a few moments before I stopped and glanced down. Why was I doing this? I mean, yes, it was slightly relaxing, the rhythm and the sound of my fingers on the bone but where did I get the idea to do that? Oh, that's right…Alice had done it before. I remember noticing it. As if I'd been caught with my hand in the cookie jar, I quickly threw my hand to my side, wiping it on the side of my shorts. Then I turned my attention to the window again. And, deciding I was a real glutton for punishment, I unlocked it.

There must have been some morbid fascination that I had with it all. Or maybe I was flattered by the fact that I was being stalked. Who knew? I sure didn't. But nevertheless I turned out the light and climbed into bed, attaching my book light to the hardcover of the novel. Six chapters in, you couldn't have torn my eyes away from the text with a crowbar. This book had all of the descriptions with a background to follow it.

The story tells of the Quileute's being attacked by beings known as Cold Ones. They were pale, hard, cold and had blood red eyes. They fed on blood and attacked the tribe often. However, they had no fangs. In fact, they looked just the opposite of a predator save for their eyes. They were described as horribly perfect and altogether charming, until the thirst overcame them. Fearful for his people, the chief called upon his gods and asked to be turned into a weapon to fight off the cold ones. He was then turned into a werewolf of sorts and killed them. That's why the werewolves are the only real known enemies of vampires.

The story then went on to talk more about the tribe and less about the vampires-er-Cold Ones. I could care less about the werewolves, so I went back up and re-read the descriptions of the Cold Ones. It was perfectly fitting, save for the eyes. The Cullens, all of them, had striking golden eyes. But why would they all have striking gold eyes? They were in no way related to each other and Rosalie had the looks of having blue eyes. And they were all pale! And they were all hard! Well…Rosalie and Alice were hard, I knew that from experience. It was so obvious now. I honestly wanted to thump the entire school and go, "Duh," but that probably wasn't the best idea. In fact, if I were the mention the idea to anyone at all, I'd lose whatever reputation I seemed to have at the school. Not that it was really that big of a deal to lose a reputation but being considered mental would probably have an impact on me. I looked over at the clock and realized that it was almost one am. There was school tomorrow and hopefully Alice would be there. If not, then the day after tomorrow. If not then…well she had to come back sometime. And when she did, I would be ready, with a bombardment of questions.

I put the book down on my bedside table, clicking off the little book light. Rolling onto my side, I faced the famous window. There was a tree just outside of it and it was swaying softly in the night wind. It would probably be pretty easy to climb up or down it. Or maybe Alice just flew up to the second story. Maybe she turned into a bat. Rolling my eyes at my own idiocy, I closed my eyes and was asleep in seconds.

The song that woke me up was rather annoying. It sounded like pop and the girl was proceeding to shout in attempts that it sounded like actual singing. I shut off my alarm in disgust, ending the radio, and sat up, rubbing my eyes. I'd gotten up early today. I didn't want to miss the Cullens if they decided to make an early arrival again at school. It was 5:30 in the morning and I could already tell that staying up to read that book, while informative, was stupid. A big part of me wanted to roll over and just head back to sleep. But the other, smaller part of me knew that I had to get up. I had to get up and get the answers. Groaning again so that the room understood my agony, I stood and stretched. I looked over at the window and noticed that it was still latched shut. Shrugging, I picked the book up off of the table and brought it with me into the bathroom. I thought about returning it to Jacob today and possibly getting a second opinion on the legend and I didn't want to forget it.

I showered quickly, not wanting to risk another escapade, and stepped out slowly. Once I was firmly on the ground, I glanced at the blurred window. There was no one, person or feline occupying it today and for that I was grateful. However, I couldn't deny the tiniest bit of worry that crept into my mind. The tiny little notion that told me that Alice wouldn't be at school today. I ignored as best as I could, brushing the knots out of my hair slowly. When all of my bathroom deeds were done, I stepped out, clad in only a towel. Charlie's door was down the hall and I could see that a light was on. He always seemed to get up early.

Once I was in my room I dropped the towel and went about the task of finding appropriate clothes. They came easily enough as I put on yet another t-shirt and some jeans. Boy, it was sure exciting. After tying my shoes I grabbed the book and stared out the window. The sun was out now, although hidden behind clouds, and I could see a light dusting of snow on the ground. I hoped there wasn't ice. My poor worn tires probably couldn't handle ice. Opting for my heavier jacket, I placed the book in it and headed downstairs. Charlie was already in the kitchen, reading the paper as always. I bet I could set my watch by him. He jumped as I walked into the kitchen and smiled with relief at me soon after. "Morning, Bella, how did that book treat you?" he asked as I sat down, waiting for the bread to become toast.

"It's just what I wanted, Dad, why?"

Charlie gave a melancholic chuckle and looked at me with a concerned expression. I raised my brow at him and he threw the paper my way.

Local College Student Attacked Near Library

Melanie Hargrove, a 20 year old student of the junior college in Port Angeles was attacked on Sunday, October 15th at approximately 9 pm just behind the Port Angeles Center Branch Library. The victim reported walking down Preview Street just after exiting the library. She was then ambushed by four men who proceeded to assault her physically and sexually. Hargrove escaped and is expected to make a full recovery and will provide police with physical descriptions of her attackers later today…

"Because it looks like finding that book saved you from a whole lot of bad shit." Charlie grimaced and looked out the window. He was positively livid, but not at me and I knew that. He was thinking of the girl and me. However I couldn't respond to him, because I was still reading the article. That was just last night. I was there and supposed to go to that very library. I felt my throat growing dry and yet my lungs filled with relief at the same time as I breathed slowly. Charlie was book. That book had saved me. I could have been the one attacked. Unconsciously, tears formed in my eyes as I read of the poor woman who might have been attacked in my place. I handed the paper back to Charlie, unable to read more and he took it from me, ripping it to shreds. Even though it was a tad scary to see him this angry, a part of me couldn't help but be proud for his compassion. It must have been where I got it from. I sighed and Charlie looked over at me, smiling again.

"I'm glad you're safe, Bells. I just…I just read that this morning and I thought of you and mentioning the library and…I hate to think of what might could have been. I mean, what happened to that young woman is horrible and I hope the bastards are punished. But I can't even imagine if it were you I was reading about." He sniffed and rubbed his mustache. I nodded understandingly and rose to give him a hug.

"I know, dad. But I'm okay."

"Yeah…you're okay."

The situation becoming just a bit awkward, we both let go. Charlie coughed and picked up the paper again, the un-ripped part, as I grabbed my toast and bag. "Hey, dad, I'm going to school early today, okay? And I thought I'd return the Black's book after school if that's okay."

"Sure, Bells…it's a bit icy but I put chains on your tires for you. And I called Billy about the book, it's not his. I must have bought it awhile ago." I tilted my head to the right just a bit, assessing his words. He couldn't have bought this awhile ago, it was brand new. And it wasn't Billy's or Jacob's. The thought of all of this put a chill down my spine but I ignored it and smiled at my father.

"Thanks, dad, I'll be home after school then, I guess," I answered as I reached for the door knob.

"Have a good day," he called. "Oh, and Bells…" I looked over and he tapped the paper with his fingers, his face becoming red. "In…in case something like this ever happens, I love you."

"I love you too, dad," I said confidently, making sure he understood every word. The article had done a number on me too but that wasn't the entire reason. I loved my father and even though I was a teenager, I wasn't ashamed to admit it. And screw every other teen that was.

He smiled and gave a short wave as I closed the door behind me. Just as Charlie had said, it was a bit icy. I knew that not only because of the ice on the ground, but because I fell twice getting to the truck and once climbing in. It must have been a skill…or a curse. A curse seemed more likely. However, despite the bumpy start I managed to get to school just fine with the Charlie's help of chaining my tires. Unsurprisingly, I was the first one in the parking lot, just like I wanted. From my experience, the Cullens always parked in the row just in front of where I parked. It was the last row before cars could park horizontally just alongside the curb of the parking lot before it merged into the street. That was where I was parked, against the curb. Trying to look as normal as possible, I stepped out, watching my step even though the school had salted the asphalt, and leaned against my truck. I pulled the Quileute Legends book out and pretended to read it, listening for signs of arriving cars.

Thirty minutes later and the parking lot was filling up. The Cullens had still not arrived. I glanced at my watch, noting that school didn't start for another twenty minutes. I really did get here early. Just as I'd returned to my book, I heard the sound. The familiar sound of a nice engine that clearly wasn't a hand-me-down. I looked up to see the silver Volvo pulling into the last available spot in the row in front of me. It was like even the students here knew where the Cullens parked and left the space for them. I watched the car as subtly as I could. They stayed in it for a few minutes and while the windows were tinted, I could tell they were all focusing on the person in the back right seat. Then, like nothing was happening, the door opened and Alice stepped out of the seat in question. She gave me a strange look and I waved her over, not really caring what she was thinking at the moment. She stared me down for a few minutes and waved me over to her. I shook my head, giving a more fervent wave. She stood there for a few seconds more before finally making her way across.

"What is it that you want, Bella?" she asked quickly, glancing over my shoulder.

"I want to talk to you," I answered, holding up the book. She read the title and her brow rose.

"Recruiting for a book club?"

"Alice, I know."

"Know what?"

I leaned in just a bit closer and flipped to the chapter where I'd highlighted its title for emphasis. It was the chapter on Cold Ones. "I know." Alice glanced at it, then scoffed a bit.

"You're being ridiculous. Let's talk about this somewhere else, please."

"No, I'm not moving from this spot until I get some answers!" I was tired of being pushed around by this little girl in every way possible. Enough was enough. Alice growled in annoyance and placed her hands on my shoulders, turning me around with enough force so that I almost lost my footing. It was a bit strange, having her tiny self move me as she did. When she finally let go of me, she'd simply reversed our order. I was more towards the end of my truck and she was at the front. Alice then stepped forward, majorly violating my personal space. I smirked at her and shook my head. "I know what you're doing. I'm not going to move. So you can either stand there and invade my personal space, or back up." Alice studied me for a few moments more before finally giving up and taking to steps back. She looked over her shoulder and then to her right. I followed her eyes and noticed that her family members were standing by, watching us. Edward was glaring very intensely at her. She watched him for a bit and while it was subtle, I saw them both give a subtle nod to each other.

"Fine, Bella, talk to me. I'm all ears," she sighed finally, resting against the truck.

"Alice, I want to know wh-

I was cut off by the sound of an earsplitting roar followed by screeching tires. I'd only managed to turn my head when I heard the sound and saw it. The ratty van that I'd seen before just careened into my truck. I screamed, along with the rest of the student body and stepped back. The van had missed me by only inches. I looked up, grasping the side of the truck for support, and saw Alice. She had one had against the side of the van and another wrapped around the side of the bed of my truck. My eyes travelled lower of their own will and I saw her petit hips wedged between both cars. Alice was leaning over, her face contorted in pain. I could hear soft whimpering. Then she looked up at me with panicked eyes and screamed. I felt my legs giving out on me but a sharp pain in my shoulder distracted me from it. I looked up into the eyes of Rosalie. She was holding me steady, although her grip was painful, and staring at her sister with a look of pure horror. A crowd had started to gather and Rosalie let me go, running closer to Alice and wedging herself between the cars to get closer to her. She cupped her face in her hands and turned to where everyone was staring.

"Move the fucking van!" she shrieked in a voice that horrified me even to hear. I couldn't imagine what she was feeling now. Emmett was on the van immediately followed by a group of boys. The van lifted with surprising ease and Alice fell limply to the ground, spared from further injury by Rosalie catching her. Rosalie then threw herself over her sister's body, almost covering her entirely. Emmett fell to Alice's other side and now she was completely restricted from view. I looked for Edward and saw him on the phone a few yards away, talking frantically. Several other kids were on cell phones, calling ambulances and their parents or friends and from the building I could see some faculty running over. I was feeling dizzy. I grabbed the truck for support and noted the indentation of Alice's hip dented in the red metal. I looked to my left and saw the same indention in the van. Before I could mutter something about that being odd, my head gave way and I fell to the pavement, unconscious.


	9. Chapter 9

Visit

I woke up long before I opened my eyes. For some reason, I just couldn't bring myself to wake up. It was like a part of me wanted to go back to sleep for about ten more days. At least until this whole ordeal had blown over. My head was throbbing. It wasn't really painful but it was annoying all the same. However, at the time I welcomed it. It distracted me from what was really going on. Like the fact that Alice Cullen had just gotten crushed between two cars. And the fact that it was my fault. My eyes started to sing and I sat up in bed quickly, welcoming the painful rush it brought to my head. The sobs came instantly and while it hurt to heave as I did, I didn't care. Was she dead? Had I killed her? Was I going to be charged? No, that was stupid. I wasn't driving. Who was driving? I tried to find the name but none came to me. Maybe I didn't know it. Everything was so confusing. Everything was so shitty. And, like always, it was all my fault.

Someone placed their hand tentatively on my head and I jerked away instinctively, looking up. Charlie had taken a step back and was looking at me worriedly. I sighed, more than relieved that it was him and relaxed, drying my tears. Charlie appeared relieved as well and he sat on the edge of my bed, putting his hand back on my head. "How are you feeling, Bells?" I groaned, stretching. It seemed like I'd been in the same position for hours. Looking around, I realized that I wasn't in a hospital like I thought, but in my room. My head, which I remembered was hurting, started to throb again and I leaned back against my pillows.

"I'm okay, I guess. What happened?"

"Some punk couldn't drive. Slipped on some ice and, uh, crashed into your truck. And…um…Alice."

I watched as his eyes filled with sorrow and instantly my chest felt heavy. The words came out quietly and I was relieved that Charlie was listening intently so I wouldn't have to try harder. "I-Is she alright?" Charlie shrugged, sharing the same expression that I held.

"I don't know, Bella. Carlisle, her dad, came to pick her up personally in the ambulance. From what I hear he won't let anyone else touch her. For now, everyone seems to be letting him take care of her but I don't know how long that'll last. They want to help, you know?" I nodded, mildly relieved that she was at least alive. Although it didn't help as much as I'd hoped. Charlie sighed and patted my knee and I smiled at him. "I'm glad you're okay, Bella. You gave me one hell of a scare."

I leaned over, taking the initiative and wrapping my arms around his neck. Charlie sighed, sinking into me just a little as he hugged me. I patted him on the back a few times and he stood, sniffing loudly and resting his hands on his gun holster. "Well, uh, I'm gonna make you something. Are you hungry, thirsty?"

"Some water would be great please."

"Okay, great." He smiled at me and left quickly. I grinned after him and listened to him head down the stairs. Even though I felt badly for him, I was sort of glad that Charlie was crying. He might have been a little embarrassed by it, but it showed me that he cared. And that really meant something. It was probably because I hadn't seen him in so long. Or maybe it was a resulting effect of the accident. The accident. I sighed again, swinging my legs off of the side of the bed. I had to get to the hospital, had to see Alice and make sure that she was okay. Though I was just a bit dizzy as a result of my fainting spell, I started to feel better as she leaned down and began to lace up my tennis shoes. Just as I finished the first, Charlie could be heard coming back up the stairs. He opened the door not a moment later and stood staring at me from the doorway, the glass of ice water gripped firmly in his hand.

"Bella, what are you doing? You need your rest and this is coming strictly from Dr. Cullen."

"Yeah, I'm sure he doesn't want me interfering," I muttered under her breath before looking up at her father. "Dad, I have to get to the hospital. Alice…Alice was hurt right in front of me, pinned between my truck and another. I just…I feel guilty." I let my head fall and heard Charlie step further into the room. He set the glass down next to me and I grabbed for it, feeling my extreme thirst return. He watched me as I downed it and then took the cup from me, holding it in his lap.

"Bella, it's not your fault. You need to know that. It was that asshole driving the van. If he wasn't speeding, the crash never would have happened. The fact that it was your truck was just an unfortunate coincidence. And I know this is going to sound horrible but, I'm glad it wasn't you that was hit." He looked up at me with a strange wounded puppy look and I nodded, turning away. I knew what Charlie meant and his sincerity had hit me hard, but it didn't really do much to extinguish the guilt. If I hadn't asked to see Alice, if I had just kept my nose out of other people's businesses, no one would have been hurt. We all would have gone into class and he just would have crashed into my truck, nothing more.

"Thanks, dad, but it's just something that I have to do. Please, may I go to the hospital?" Charlie studied me for a moment, his eyes searching around my injured head. Then he sighed and stepped into the hall.

"At least let me make sure you're okay to drive," he called. I quickly laced up my other shoe and stepped into the hall, feeling much less disoriented once I was standing. Charlie was standing in front of his door and he pointed to the wooden floor I was standing on. "See that line?" He ran his foot over a certain overlaying of wood that created a straight line. "I need you to walk it." I gave him a skeptical look but he merely motioned his hands in a manner that told me to continue. Sighing, I put my foot on the small line and began to walk it, one foot right in front of the other, until I was just a few steps away from him. He nodded and looked me over again. "Say the alphabet backwards."

"Dad, come-

"Bella, you're not drunk. If you're in the right state of mind you can do it. I have to know."

"Z, Y, X, W, V…U, T," I paused, running through the alphabet the correct way in my mind. "Uh…S, R, Q, P…" Charlie held up a hand to stop me and nodded approvingly.

"That's good enough. You did better than I did the first time I had to run through that. Though…I might have been in a different state of mind. Alright, Bella, you're free to go. But please, please be careful. If you feel dizzy or anything, pull over and if you can't make it you give me a call. Do you understand?" I nodded slowly and Charlie exhaled emphatically, shaking his head. "Okay, I'm heading back to work. If I work through lunch I should be home a few hours earlier. I'm gonna see if Mike Shepherd can cover the rest of my shift."

"That's really not necessary, Dad."

"Like hell it is. Don't argue with me on that, Bella." His eyes became hard again and I nodded obediently, keeping my mouth shut as I followed him down the stairs. He climbed into his cruiser at the same time I climbed into my truck. I waited for him to pull out first but he waved his hand, motioning for me to go. I rolled my eyes. So maybe the cop dad could be a little overprotective. But at least his intentions were good. As smoothly as I could in an attempt to impress my father I eased out of the driveway. Then I slowly hit the gas and headed down the road. Charlie followed me for a couple of blocks in the completely wrong direction before I finally saw him turn down a residential street to get back to the station. I rolled my eyes again; somehow glad to be out of his watchful eye. It must have been the usually dormant rebellious teenager within me. Still feeling well, I increased my speed, certain that I was fine. The truck groaned but eventually smoothed out as it reached 40 mph.

The hospital was towards the city limits of town and while the sign outside said Forks Community Hospital, I was skeptical. It was a pretty small building for a hospital and I wondered briefly if it could even accommodate someone in Alice's condition. Maybe she'd been flown to Tacoma. Well, this used to be a logging town; perhaps it was pretty advanced for such a small sight as logging was so dangerous. The guilt inside of me was welling up again but I pushed it back down as I parked and stepped out of my truck. Despite my clumsiness, my accidents never really resulted in the need to go to a hospital, so all of this was fairly new to me. Not really having a clue, I went inside and up to the front desk. She ignored me for a few seconds and then gave me a semi-fake smile when she lifted her head. "Hi, I was wondering if Alice Cullen was here?" The receptionist looked at me for a few minutes before fluttering her eyelids.

"Only family can see her at this moment."

"What about Dr. Cullen?"

"He's family. He's seeing her at this moment."

"Ma'am, really, this is a special case. I was involved in Alice's accident. I need to make sure that she's okay."

"There's nothing I can do."

By this time her attitude was really starting to get to me. She really had no reason to be all high and mighty. I tapped my fingers angrily along the counter and sighed. She appeared to roll her eyes at me and I scoffed, gaining her attention once again. "Look, ma'am, you can either let me see Dr. Cullen, or I can give myself a reason to. I've just been in a traumatizing accident and I'm capable of anything at this point."

"Nice try, honey," she answered, looking back to her computer. I grimaced and turned away. Just as I was about to take my first step out of the door, I heard others open behind me. I looked back, merely out of interest, and quickly thanked my lucky stars. Dr. Cullen was coming out of the doors. Well, I assumed it was Dr. Cullen. He was tall, thin and deathly pale. He had thick blonde hair and the most wonderful golden eyes. He looked just like Alice and the others. It had to be him. And he appeared to be walking towards me. He smiled at me when I met his eyes and I returned it, unable to help myself.

"I thought I told you to inform me if Miss Swan came in, Brenda," Carlisle said to the receptionist as I walked over. Feeling more than proud of myself, I glared at her. She paid me no mind, but it still felt good to do so.

"She…uh…she never gave me a name. I didn't know," she stammered out. I watched her eyes rake over the doctor's striking features and smirked. The poor thing was simply dazzled by him. What a geek. Then again, I made an ass of myself the first time I saw Alice. Perhaps I shouldn't talk.

"Well, maybe next time it would be best to ask." Carlisle smiled at the girl softly and, dare I say it, sincerely. She returned it like a girl my age, practically swooning at his feet. I rolled my eyes, a common habit for today, and noticed the doctor watching me. "Bella, perhaps you'd like to come with me?" he asked in a smooth tone. I nodded and he turned swiftly, pushing a button to open the double doors leading into the actual hospital. "How are you feeling, Bella? Just a simple knock to the noggin, right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Charlie, Chief Swan, made me walk a straight line before he allowed me to come here." Carlisle chuckled at that and shrugged, turning down another hallway.

"Well, his intentions were good, I'll give him that." Carlisle stopped at an empty station and turned to face me. I looked around and noticed that no one was here. It quite literally gave me the creeps. However, Carlisle's eyes were kind and that eased me just a bit, even though serial killers used the same façade. "Alice has been asking about you, Bella, though not really for you," he began, studying me intently. I straightened my posture and made sure to look him in the eyes and focus. "And I'm going to allow you in there. I can only hope that you'll keep your composure."

"Does she…look bad or something?"

Carlisle grinned, shaking his head in a knowing manner. "That's all I ask, okay?" Still just a bit confused, I nodded and he led me down the hall and to the right before stopping in front of a door. I almost ran into him at first and before he opened the door, I glanced down the hall. The rest of the family, presumably, was waiting in a private waiting room. I recognized everyone I had seen from school. The only different person I saw there was another woman, who I assumed was Mrs. Cullen. All at once they seemed to notice me and their strange eyes fell on me. Mrs. Cullen gave me a short smile as Edward glared. Emmett appeared to be looking through me rather than at me and Rosalie…. I couldn't quite read Rosalie's expression. "Take your time," Carlisle said quietly, opening the door. I nodded and headed into the room, hearing the door click shut behind me.

The room was pretty big for a hospital room. It only held one bed and there was no window, so the entire room was pretty dark. However, light from the hallway was filtering in through the blinds on the door and when I stepped out of the way it lit the room a little more. I could see Alice's petite frame shifting slowly under the pale blue covers. Slowly, I stepped closer to the bed. I could see her sitting up and I knew she was looking right at me but her face was shadowed by the room. "Hey, Alice…" I muttered as I stepped to the side of her bed. Her face was clearer to me now and I could see she was looking incredulously at me.

"Why did you come here?" she asked, shifting in the bed restlessly. I looked down at her actions, noticing her hips moving with ease.

"I came to see you. How the hell are you doing that?" I pointed to her waist and she stopped moving instantly, relaxing slowly back into her pillows. "You…you can't be doing that." I was in a sudden state of disbelief. In all of the commotion, I'd completely forgotten about my theories and suspicions. I'd only thought of Alice's well being. But now, it was all flooding back at a remarkable pace and I grabbed the siding of Alice's bed to steady myself. Alice still hadn't said anything and the silence was producing a humming noise in my ears. "Alice, forgive me but, for all intents and purposes you should be dead."

"It wasn't as bad as it looked," she answered quickly and shyly. Very well acted.

"Bullshit,"

"Are you questioning my injuries, Bella? I still can't get up and move. I am healing." Her tone was becoming harder now and I watched her brow furrow. I looked down at her hips again and then back at her face. I just couldn't get a break. Not that I was always right, but I was getting pretty sick and tired of everyone doubting everything I'd been doing the past few days. I looked around the room and noticed that Alice wasn't hooked up to a monitor. There wasn't an IV in her arm either. She was just…lying in a bed.

"How the hell are you getting away with this!" I shouted, motioning towards the imaginary machinery that should have been there. Alice looked at me like I was stupid and that quite literally blew a gasket in my patience. Alice's grip tightened on her sheets and she challenged me with her look. I had the intention of ripping her covers off and exposing her unharmed body but her recent grip prevented me from doing so. Instead, I stared her down and moved to the end of the bed. "Can you really not move, Alice?"

"I can a little. It still hurts."

"Then, you shouldn't be able to stop me from doing this," I said as I untucked the sheets at the end of the bed. In the back of my mind I could have sworn I'd heard her growl, but she made no attempts to move. Once the sheets were freed, I threw them off the side of the bed, exposing Alice in her little hospital gown. I studied her pale legs. There wasn't a single scratch on them.

"Bella, don't. You aren't going to like what you see," Alice warned, bringing her legs closer to her. I shook my head, a woman on a mission, and reached for the hem of her gown. In an instant, Alice's hand was closed around my wrist, squeezing it with enough force to get my attention but not to hurt. "Don't," she growled again, her eyes cold and hard. For the first time since I'd seen Alice Cullen, I actually felt fear. And I sure as hell didn't like it. Alice gave my wrist another squeeze and threw it back at me before covering herself back up. I took a step back and she scoffed, crossing her arms. "Honestly, what more could I have done? Yes, it was a mistake for me to get so close to you in the first place but I broke it off. I broke it off, Bella, and tried my best to stay away from you. You don't have any right to be here given all of the circumstances."

"You call staying away from me watching me while I sleep? You've got some warped views, Alice," I responded, angry that she was treating me this way. Alice sighed, shaking her head as she looked to the door. Then she let her crossed arms fall to her lap and looked up at me again.

"Bella, if you leave now with no questions asked, I promise that I'll give you all of the answers."

"When?"

"This evening,"

"I can't come back up here this evening."

"I'll meet up with you. But please leave me alone."

I sighed, looking towards the door. "Do you really promise, Alice? Because I'm getting really sick of being the town idiot." Tears filled my eyes, more out of anger than anything else and I wiped them quickly. However the change in Alice's expression led me to believe that she'd seen the shine in my eyes. Her face fell slightly and filled with compassion. Then she nodded, playing with her hands.

"I promise. I'll meet up with you tonight."

I nodded, not really having enough will power to stay in there any longer without making a huge scene of some sort and bolted out the door. I didn't even look back to see if the rest of the Cullens were behind me as I left. I couldn't see any of them right now. The receptionist said something to me as I left but I ignored her as she'd done me. I definitely didn't want to see her. That would probably result in bloodshed. I was in a sort of daze as I drove home. I could see the road and drove fine but my mind was sort of in a state of shock. My mind kept replaying everything from the wreck and the hospital of its own accord. I couldn't block it out no matter how many times I tried to fill my head with 'Yankee Doodle.' Yes, I had suspected Alice of being a vampire. And yes, it still seemed plausible. But honestly, a vampire? Seriously? No…the back of my mind had always challenged that notion. And it was that part of my mind that I suspected was keeping me sane. But now the doubt was fading and that worried me. It worried me greatly.

When I finally made it home, I was mentally exhausted. I just barely managed to crawl up to my bed where I took a much needed nap to clear my mind. As if someone or something understood, I wasn't plagued by dreams as I slept. It was just dark. Charlie accidentally woke me up at around four when he opened my door to check on me. He spoke softly, knowing I wanted to go back to sleep and quickly made me a grilled cheese sandwich. I was able to eat about half of it before I started to think again. Once that happened I fell back asleep and was disturbed no more.

"Bella, Bella wake up," said the voice belonging to the person nudging my shoulder. I groaned some sort of response and sat up quickly, rubbing my eyes. By the time they focused, the creature was sitting on my bed. I realized instantly that it was Alice. She was dressed in normal clothes and appeared to be sitting cross legged just fine.

"Alice…what are you doing here?" I asked, still waking up from my slumber. The window to my left was dark and I looked at my clock. It was a little after ten. Alice smiled, standing up off of the bed and heading over to the window to open it again.

"Do you still want answers?" she asked, straddling the windowsill.

"Uh-huh,"

"Well then come on." And with that, she let go of the sill and allowed herself to fall out of the window.


	10. Chapter 10

Answers

I didn't scream when she fell and I don't know why. Perhaps I was still waking up or perhaps I was just used to all of the antics. Either way, I did not scream but rather gasped and darted to the window. My hands gripped the rail, making tiny squeaking sounds on the smooth paint, and I leaned outside. It took a few moments and some serious squinting for me to finally adjust to the darkness but finally my vision cleared and I could see Alice standing at the base of the tree, looking up at me. She waved for me to come down and I almost shouted down at her but remembered Charlie was in the house. Alice must have noticed my hesitation for she smiled and pointed towards the back door. I nodded and she started walking away. As soon as she disappeared around the house I turned to race down the stairs, only to notice that my shoes were off. They weren't far, just a few feet from my bed but I couldn't remember taking them off. Maybe Charlie had at some point. I sat back down on my bed and as I began to lace up my sneakers, I felt a strange feeling creep over me.

Memories of Alice growling and grabbing my wrist were suddenly thrown into view. The feeling sent a shiver up my spine and I quickly straightened to make it go away. Alice wasn't a cruel person and I knew that. Or I knew that as of now. But, there was definitely something different, something more primal about her. And that was…intimidating to say the least. If we were going with my previous theory I was about to go gallivanting off with a vampire into the woods. I was the B horror movie slut that everyone loved to scream at for being an idiot. I knew it, and I was going to head out that door anyway. The allure of answers was all too appealing… especially since I'd been feeling so ignored lately in my questioning. I stepped lightly down the stairs, my ears tuned to any noise coming from upstairs. Thankfully there was none and I grabbed my jacket off of the kitchen chair before heading outside. Rather than waiting in the shadows to jump out and scare me like I half-expected, Alice was standing in plain sight when I came out. She smiled nervously at me and I returned it before shutting the door behind me.

"Is that jacket going to be enough?" she asked softly as I turned to her. I looked down at my windbreaker and shrugged.

"I'm fine right now."

Alice nodded with wide eyes and shoved her hands in the pockets of her own jacket. "Well…let's get a move on then. My car's just through this path here." She motioned with her hand and began walking. I followed with a quickened pace and was able to catch up with her easily. Though we were walking side by side, we weren't really walking together. Alice was very clearly off in her own head and I was completely absorbed in my own thoughts. This whole ordeal seemed a bit off to me. Sort of like I was in a dream but I knew I was dreaming or something. I didn't even know how to put all of this into words so I just walked, listening to our feet crunch beneath us.

Before too long the small path we were walking down opened up and revealed to us a stretch of highway. I looked behind me as we came upon it, wondering how I had never known of this path just behind my house. Perhaps it had been made since I'd last been here. It made sense, as it had been years. Either way I'd definitely have to explore said path more thoroughly later. A small tinkling of metal brought my attention back forward and I looked back just in time to see headlights flash in front of me. Had the headlights of this car not flashed I probably would have walked smack dab into the thing. It was a sleek black that blended perfectly with the evening. I tried to make out the subtle silver making of the car but it was too dark.

A hand was placed on the small of my back and I jumped as Alice quickly pulled away. "S-sorry," I gasped as I quickly worked at calming myself down. Alice shook it off and motioned to the car.

"Let's just get in. It's, you know, cold out."

I nodded and felt my way around to the passenger side. The door opened silently and I slid in, noting the comfort of the seats. This car was mega nice. The dashboard lights were on and I knew that one glance to the steering wheel would let me know just how nice the car was. Even as I slowly began to peek over there, a part of me didn't want to look. I knew it was because of my own slight jealousy but I couldn't help it. Chicks and cars or something…. Ah, an Infinite, not too shabby of a car at all. I scoffed to myself as Alice slid into the driver's seat and sat cross-legged. She glanced at me and ran a hand through her short hair to scratch the back of her neck.

"Is something wrong?" she asked, sending me a nervous look. I shook my head quickly.

"No, I was just…scoffing."

"Usually, people scoff at something."

"Yeah…well…I just scoff randomly."

Alice blinked a few times, then shrugged incredulously. "Good to know, I suppose. Speaking of," she paused and turned to face me, her tiny frame easily fitting in the luxury seat, "what would you like to know?" I glared at her for a moment, trying to see if she was lying. But, like always, I couldn't read the girl. So I settled for trusting her word, which probably wasn't the best idea but it was all I had.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Okay…um, who are you?"

"Alice Cullen," she laughed. I smiled in spite of myself and quickly tried to keep my not so intimidating scowl. Alice seemed to have noticed for her grin widened just a bit.

"Um…what, are you?"

"What do you think I am?"

"You didn't say you'd be asking questions."

"Quid pro quo, Clarice," Alice answered in a voice that was way too convincing as Hannibal Lector.

"Okay…that's just scary," I said, looking over my shoulder and half expecting a severed head to face me. Alice laughed again and shrugged.

"It's just…I've never really been open before. It's kind of hard for me to say, you know? But, I think it'll be easier if you just give me your guess."

I opened my mouth to protest her. In all honesty I was a little embarrassed too. 'Hey, Alice, I totes think you're a vampire' didn't seem like it would go over well except in a mental institution. But just as I was about to speak, Alice shook her head, as if I'd been thinking aloud.

"You're not wrong, Bella. Just say it."

I sighed, feeling the color rush to my cheeks. "Fine, I might maybe think that you have…vampire tendencies or something." Out of habit I shut my eyes, looking away. I could feel Alice's eyes on me but couldn't hear anything. My heart began to beat loudly and I was going to scoff at myself but decided against it due to our previous conversation. Alice still had not said anything. This was really fucking painful. I should learn to keep stupid admissions to myself. I should learn to just not be an idiot also but that just didn't seem to be in the cards.

"Your cheeks are fuming again," Alice said finally. "They do that a lot." I laughed nervously and placed my hands on my cheeks.

"Thanks for noticing."

"I didn't say it was a bad thing. Well…it's kind of a bad thing, but that's not the point."

"What are you talking about, Alice?" I looked up, rather angry now and was met with sympathetic eyes. Alice gave a nervous laugh of her own and shrugged.

"Yeah…I'm a vampire."

"No you're not."

"Excuse me?"

"No you're not."

"I think I'd know."

"Come on, Alice! It's not cool to mess with people like this. Don't you think I'm embarrassed enough?" I shouted, slapping my hands against my legs. Either logic or denial had taken over my thoughts and while I thought uttering the words would make me feel better, they just made everything worse. I could feel my self confidence, what I had left of it, dwindling away and images of what the next day at school would be like. I'd be classified as that freaky chick that was way too into Asian stuff and thought I was a fairy from Narnia or something. It scared me. I was used to being an outcast, but not necessarily a freak.

A pale hand appeared on my leg and gave it a gentle squeeze. I forced myself to look at Alice and when I did, she made no reaction to my attention. She simply looked at me. At first, I didn't know what to make of it. It was her turn to respond according to the basic rules of conversation, or in this case, accusation. But no…she was just staring at me. "You know, it would really help my sanity if you said something," I muttered finally, sick of all of this Kubrick shit.

"I'm trying to think of what to say actually. I'm usually pretty good with words but…" Alice drifted off, looking out the window into the ill-lit road. "I mean, I can't contradict what you say. I don't know what you want to hear that won't result in me lying." She looked back at me and I compared her ashen skin to the dark interior of the car. They were so starkly opposite that Alice appeared almost fluorescent in front of me. It was strange and even hurt my eyes a bit. I focused on the odd looking bags under her eyes to keep my vision from blurring.

"So…you mean to tell me that I am right. You're a vampire?"

"Yes. We, my family, have never disclosed this secret to anyone before so I'm sorry if it's not going well."

"Your whole family consists of vampires?"

"Yes, every one of them."

"So…what's your definition of vampire? Is this some weird religion like Wiccan or something?" Alice laughed, the sound filling the car and I relaxed a bit at the sound.

"If only it was that easy. We are the standard Nosferatu and Dracula type vampires, save for a few differences."

"So you…drink blood."

"Yes." Alice's voice was lower than a whisper but in the silent car I heard it perfectly. So, assuming that she wasn't pulling my leg, this girl was a predator. And I was sitting in her car. Smart move, Bella, really. I licked my lips, unsure of what to do or say next? I mean, what did someone do in this situation? Run, scream, ask more questions? Well, I was filled with questions and skepticism…might as well wear both of them out.

"Is there any way…without causing harm to anyone, that you can prove it to me?"

"Prove what?"

"Prove that you're…what you say you are."

Alice looked at me sideways and motioned to her lap. "You need more proof than the mere fact that I'm walking?" I took a deep breath and studied her hips. Alice must have noticed for she proceeded to swivel them in her seat, as if to show me how functional they were. I watched them, feeling a strange sensation enter me as I did so. And yes, that movement was crazy…crazy. But it wasn't enough. I had a feeling it was going to take a bit of effort before I was completely sold on this vampire thing. So I nodded to her and she sighed, looking around the car for something to prove her point. She ended up pulling out a pen from the center console and clicked it open. She held the pen up for me to focus on, then, faster than I could even hope to see, drove the pen into her other hand. I gasped, my hands flying to my mouth. But Alice merely shook her head and opened her hand. Inside lay the pen. The opening was cracked into a few pieces and the ink tube was completely bent. Alice held up her hand and I noticed that there wasn't a single blemish on it.

"When we die…our body hardens after death. Lack of oxygen or liquids or something, I don't know. I've never really asked. That's why the trucks, while painful, weren't really threatening. It was sort of the equivalent of being sandwiched between to varsity footballers running at full speed. We also heal wonderfully quickly. I don't know why either. One of the mythical traits I guess."

"Shouldn't you…like, know what's going on with your body?" I asked, somewhat incredulously at the vague answers. Alice shrugged, tracing the steering wheel of the car with one finger.

"Probably, but do you know why your skin is squishy and loose? Or why your body heals so slowly or how it heals?"

"Not off the top of my head."

"Exactly."

"But…you weren't always…this way. Wouldn't you, like, wake up with one big 'what the fuck?'"

Alice giggled again and when she smiled I studied her mouth. No fangs. But in some stories and such that I'd read, they were retractable, such as a snake. "Personally, I don't remember anything from my human life. This is all I've known. And like I said, we've never had to explain this sort of thing before. You're taking this very calmly. Are you still skeptical?"

"I'm just…in a sort of shock, I guess. And probably still skeptical, yeah. Course, I probably will be for a while. Do you have fangs?"

"Sadly, no. I've seen them in movies and they look like they'd make things easier but no. Our strength and canines are what break the skin generally."

"So where did the fang thing come from then?"

"I don't know. Like I said it makes perfect sense. We're just poorly designed."

"Quite. You're hardly a vampire at all." The both of us laughed at that and I felt another wave of ease washing over me. This…all around weirdness was becoming more and more bearable. Alice was right, I was taking this calmly. In spite of myself, I felt just a little bit proud of myself at that admission. Alice took a bit of a deep breath and I watched her torso rise in the intake.

"So…you can breathe." Alice exhaled, nodding.

"Yes, though we don't have to. No circulation or anything. It helps to look more normal and such and it's a bit of a habit."

"Ah, cool,"

It was quiet for a moment after that. Both of us were clearly struggling in the silence. But I wasn't sure of what else to say. Alice kept glancing at me expectantly and I met her eyes with question. A car passed by on the lonely street and I squinted into the headlights. Alice reached over and pulled down the visor which helped significantly and I thanked her.

"So, are you not going to ask me the most basic question?"

"Which is?" I asked, playing with my hands.

"How we…satiate ourselves?"

The blood rushed to my cheeks again, followed quickly by my palms. Alice looked as if she either wanted to smile or cry but I couldn't tell which. It was starting to get eerie again. The dark highway in a nice car in the middle of the woods. It was just like in the movies. I was going to ask what she ate, she would respond with 'me' and then leap on me and take my life. Perhaps that's why I'd refrained from asking. I didn't want to give her the buildup to the kill. I glanced over at her one more and she seemed innocent enough. Not that that meant anything at all. Innocence was probably all part of her plan. But either way, I was already stupid enough to come out here. Might as well get the answers before I met my death.

"Okay…how do you satiate yourself?"

Much to my surprise, Alice looked extremely relieved and leaned in a bit closer to me. "We don't prey on humans. Like you, we only eat animals."

"Humans are animals."

"Fine, technical, we only feast on animals of the non homo sapiens species."

"Oh, well, that's cool then. Glad I'm not going to be eaten."

"Did you think I was going to eat you?" Alice's face fell after her question and I kicked myself in the head, mentally of course. All of this was clearly a sensitive topic and I was just slandering it. Way to go.

"I…no, I didn't. I'm sorry, Alice. I didn't mean it like that," I said quietly, looking down at my jeans.

"Well, if you didn't mean it, don't look so forlorn." I looked over and she gave me a comforting smile before adjusting her shirt. It was a cute shirt, I noticed. Hugged her nicely and showed off her cleavage. Not that I was looking, mind you. "So," she began, breaking my staring, "do you have any more questions?"

"Well, I'm sort of going to take this in stride, if that's okay with you. But I do have one more question."

"Shoot."

"Why did you decide to tell me?"

Alice's eyes narrowed at this and she furrowed her brow curiously. "Because you're a persistent little thing. The family was starting to worry that you'd lose it if we didn't come up with something better than the little white lies we'd been feeding you. And…I might perhaps enjoy your company too much to push you away forever." I smiled at that but couldn't dwell on the comment for too long. Because soon after she spoke her expression to one of dire seriousness. It was a little bit intimidating actually and I felt myself leaning away from her as she spoke again. "But, Bella, this is serious. If we're found out, we'll have to move and no one wants to do that until necessary. So, if you could keep this under wraps, it'd be appreciated. Not so much as writing it in your journal, if you keep one."

I nodded, then gained a mischievous look of my own. "You should know if I keep a journal, Alice."

"I should?" I blinked once slowly and she got my meaning. Her eyes darted from side to side nervously and she crossed her arms.

"You don't keep a journal. I'm…sorry about that, Bella. It was dreadfully intrusive and if you feel the need to berate me or something, I accept it fully."

"No, there's no need for that. But, why did you allow yourself to get caught? You're obviously sleuth and speedy."

Alice licked her lips and smiled as if she held a precious secret. It was a smile that I didn't altogether trust yet didn't fear. It was…fun. "I suppose that there was a part of me, the bad girl part of me, that wanted to be caught by you. I know that sounds horribly perverse and I probably am horribly perverse but that's the best explanation I've got. I'm sorry…again. And I'll continue to apologize until…ever."

"It's okay, Alice. I'm glad you told me. Though…I still don't get why?"

Alice sighed, throwing her eyes to the ceiling as if it held the answers. Then she leaned forward to where we were just a few inches apart. And when she spoke, she spoke in a whisper like an excited child. "There's something…fascinating about watching you, or any other human I imagine, sleep. You're so…uninhibited and beautiful and so completely human. I mean, you, for instance, stretch very languidly, mumble and make the most glorious facial expressions. It's a beautiful thing to watch.

I blushed at the mentioning of the adjective and Alice laughed once more, placing her own hands on my cheeks. "Now, you do have to work on that. While we don't prey on you, that doesn't mean that you're not appetizing. And all of this blood rushing does not help cravings." I nodded and she smiled, rubbing my cheeks slowly until I felt the heat disappear. When she let her hands drop, her face stayed in the same spot just inches away. I made sure to breathe through my nose, we were that close. Alice seemed to be studying my eyes and I tried my best to hold contact with hers. Not that it was hard, they were so stunningly golden. And she really was so pretty. Looking at her wasn't all that much of a problem, even if I felt a little weird doing so. This whole ordeal was just off. I didn't like it. But I liked being with her. Lesser of two evils, I supposed.

"You're very interesting, Bella Swan," Alice said after a few more seconds. I took this opportunity to lean back a ways and scoffed.

"Yeah…I'm the interesting one. Says the vampire."


	11. Chapter 11

Deal

Alice laughed at the comment, further revealing her splendidly white teeth and I sighed, not feeling guilty for watching her this time. When she relaxed a few moments later she shook her head, seemingly at my previous comment. "You are interesting, Bella. I mean, granted, I've never told a human that I was a vampire but I have a feeling others would handle it differently." I shrugged, not really having an answer to give and she turned to face forward again. While she wasn't looking directly at her I roamed my eyes over her body. Not in a perverted way…it was more like I was just trying to further figure her out and I somehow thought I could achieve that with staring. What can I say, logic was pretty well failing me at this moment. Alice absently let her right hand fall onto the gearshift and I studied it as it laid there. Her fingers were long and slender, well fitting for her figure, and her nails were a good length and looked manicured. Of course, I doubted that they were. Her being, you know, cold to the touch and hard and stuff. I studied the porcelain skin of the top of her hand and noted where the pen should have driven through. It was untouched. Remembering the pen reminded me of her speed and I inhaled to speak, causing Alice to look over at me again.

"So, why do you have super speed? I noticed when you stabbed yourself with the pen." Alice nodded as if super speed was the most appropriate topic in the world.

"It's one of our predatory skills. We have the speed to catch whatever we're hunting. It especially comes in handy for those of us that don't feed on humans because obviously, the game we hunt are faster than you." She pointed a slender finger at me smiled sweetly. It seemed like the wrong action to do but I smiled anyway and nodded.

"So, what other super special skills do you have? Can you fly?"

"No, no flying. Nor can we turn into bats, sadly. We can jump fairly high and…we're strong and…hard and cold and deadly. Some of us have miscellaneous powers. Though we should smell like decay, we have a very intoxicating scent to lure in our prey." I quirked my brow at Alice's last words and she tilted her head to the side. "You haven't really smelled it?" she asked.

I shook my head. "Not really, just once or twice but I wouldn't call it intoxicating. No offense." Alice shook her head and murmured that none was taking. Then she shifted in her seat and leaned towards me with her neck outstretched. By this time the column of her throat was a few mere inches away from my nose.

"How about now? It's not supposed to be all that potent." I blinked for a few moments, holding my breath out of some subconscious spite or something. But after a few moments I inhaled. Oh, it did smell nice. I breathed in again and closed my eyes. The scent could not have a name and I would do it an injustice to try to compare it to something like vanilla or oranges. But it was delicious and I felt myself wanting more. However, much to my dismay, Alice pulled away at that moment and relaxed back into her seat.

"Okay, I smelled it then," I said shyly.

"What did you think of it?"

"I kind of wanted to drink it in."

"That's how we feel with human blood." I opened my mouth to agree but stopped myself. Alice was looking intently at me, studying my reaction. I mulled her words over in my mind and finally formulated the right response.

"So, blood smells to you what you smell to me?" Alice nodded.

"Pretty much, but far more potent. When we're full and not craving, it's about the equivalent of what you just experienced. When we're, you know, deprived of satiation for long periods it becomes dangerously heady." She paused for a moment to study my expression again and then quickly added, "I'm fine, by the way. I would never get close to you or any other human if I couldn't handle myself." The girl then looked down ashamedly and began to play with her hands. Before I really thought about what I was doing, I reached out and placed both of my hands on hers. She looked up quickly and we almost bumped foreheads so I leaned back a bit but kept my hands in place.

"I know, Alice. I really do. I mean, even when my survival instincts are pleading me to be afraid, I can't. I just know you wouldn't harm me." Alice smiled and mouthed a thank you to me before pulling her hands away. They slid out of my palms quickly and made me think I did something wrong, so I slunk back into my seat. Alice watched me to do and sighed.

"I'm sorry. It's not you, really. We…" she drifted and looked up, trying to think of the right words. "We are dead for all intents and purposes, right? So, in the technical sense we are just hardened and functioning corpses. And while we definitely have more stamina than a regular corpse, we still have to take care of ourselves. Heat…sunlight…anything too warm causes a sort of decay on our body. It's a slow moving process and it is generally reversible when we're brought back into the cold but…it gets gross. So, we can experience it, it's just not wise." She sighed again and muttered to herself to quickly for me to understand. "I'm sorry, I'm not explaining this very well."

"I think I get it." I interjected, hoping to help her out. "Going out into the sun or exposing the body to heat does what a corpse does. It rots, decays and gets gross. That's why you…pulled away. I'm…warm, right?" Alice nodded, kneading her bottom lip in her teeth.

"That's right. I just…I just hope you know of how badly I didn't want to pull away." Her lip fell from between her teeth and formed into a small pout. I felt a blush coming on and looked away for a moment to keep it from coming on strong. Had Alice not said that, not looked at me the way she had, I wouldn't have known how badly she didn't want to pull away. That admission made me feel so much better than I thought it would have, but I wasn't rejecting it.

"That's, uh…really good to know," I responded finally, smiling at her. She returned it and went back to playing with her hands. "How…how old are you?"

"19,"

"How old are you?"

"About 108,"

"Woah, that's cool."

"I really didn't see cool coming as the appropriate word." Alice paused for a moment and eyed me strangely. Then she sighed and let her hands fall to her lap. "I kind of left out an important detail. Thanks for bearing with me."

"Hey, I think it's going well."

"Thanks for that. But, remember when I mentioned that some of us have certain powers? Well, I sort of have one."

"You have a…power? Like, like what?"

"Like, I sort of have premonitions. I can see the future, lamely put." I furrowed my brow at her, contemplating what she'd just said. Honestly, was there anything this chick couldn't do? Being a vampire was sounding pretty damn cool.

"Are they correct, your visions?"

"They're subjective. They change in accordance with someone changing their mind. But at the time that I see them, they are correct."

"And can you see them about anything?"

"Well, I mainly see them about people I'm close to or am going to be close to. For instance…I see them about you…." If Alice could, I had a feeling she would have been blushing at that moment and I fought to keep mine down. I knew what she was saying. I wasn't stupid. It was just hard to digest in one sitting of finding out your friend was a vampire. Was she even my friend? Apparently she was going to be. And maybe possibly more? Before I could dwell on that notion I was reminded that I had to respond.

"What have you seen?"

"If it's okay, I'd rather wait and see how this," she waved her hand between the two of us, "goes before I say anything." I nodded, slightly disappointed but her logic made sense.

"So long as I'm not going to die any time soon I guess that's okay," I muttered, hoping to lighten the mood. Alice smiled at me but it seemed off. However, before I could ask her about it she changed the subject.

"So, the reason I told you about that is because I see us…being close, you know? But as I said my visions are subject to people changing their minds. So before we get too close I just wanted to make sure that…I don't know, that you were aware of who- what I was. What I am."

"How close do you see us getting?" I asked quietly, knowing it was selfish but being unable to let it go. Alice sighed and shook her head and I imagined her eyes watering at this point. Perhaps she couldn't cry either. It made sense. The vampire sighed and I was pulled from my thoughts to stare at her again.

"Premonitions aren't so much a gift as they are a curse," she said quietly. In fact, it was so quiet that had I not been focusing on her mouth I wouldn't have heard it. Deciding that it was best to leave the subject at that, I went back to Alice's previous comment.

"Alice, I like you. I think it'd be awesome if we could be friends. And I'm…flexible to your…I don't know, vampirism or what you'd like to call it. I'm sure that it'll all just work itself out if we just take it as it comes, you know?" Alice nodded and her smile grew wider as she did.

"That's really great to hear, Bella. While I would have respected your decision otherwise, I would have been a little disappointed."

"I think I would have too but, if I may, why do you want to be my friend? I mean, I see all of you at lunch and you don't seem to have any human friends. What's different about me?" Alice's eyes widened a bit and she leaned in closer to me, resting her arm on the center console of the car.

"A lot is different about you, Bella. For one, your scent is one of the most powerful that any of us have ever encountered. Another is that my brother, Edward, can read minds. He can't read yours. That's why he's always glaring at you if you were wondering. He hates not being in control. And I've…seen us together. That's a new one as well. Not to mention the way you've handled this entire conversation is very impressive. I'd say there's a lot more to you then there are to other humans such as, say, Jessica Stanley." I laughed at that and Alice quickly followed. Once it had calmed down it was quiet for a few minutes. I spent my time trying to think of loopholes to Alice's story or look for hidden cameras in the car or anything to talk me out of the fact that I was believing what this girl was saying to me. However, I simply couldn't make myself do it. She had been too kind, too considerate and too nervous for me to really think that she was messing with me. And if it turned out that this was some spoof, I'd just deal with it and nominate Alice for a best actress Oscar. No one could really blame me then. I yawned then, and leaned back into the cushioned seat of the luxury car. Alice looked over at me and switched the car on to illuminate the clock. It was past one o'clock. My eyes widened at the sight of the time and I rose in my seat.

"I guess we should probably head back," Alice said with a hint of reluctance in her voice that I fully understood.

"I guess. I'm pretty sure I don't want to go to school tomorrow."

"I don't think you have to go to school, Bella. You've been through a trauma and I'm sure your father would understand. I myself don't have to go back for a few months or so. Hip therapy, you know?" I giggled and Alice swiveled her hips again to add to the mockery.

"Thanks for that. I think I will stay home tomorrow. I just don't want to deal with anyone from school. Except for maybe you." Alice grinned at that and I couldn't help it, but I blushed. She laughed at that and placed her finger on my cheek, running it down and cooling it with its touch. I sighed and her finger travelled lower to my neck. The chill of her hand was refreshing and I found my breaths becoming deeper, as if I was sort of in an alternate state of mind. Alice's other hand went to trace the exposed skin of my hand and wrist. Her touch was so soft and so cold. It was wonderful. Before closing my eyes, I stole a glance at Alice. She was staring almost longingly at my neck. That image probably should have scared the holy hell out of me but it didn't. Instead, I sort of felt, well, flattered by the action.

"What the hell am I doing with you?" the pixie whispered ever so quietly. I didn't respond but merely opened my mouth to exhale. I'd never been touched by anyone like this. Never so exploratory. It was a strange, albeit enticing feeling. I didn't want her to stop.

"Would you…stay the night tonight?" I murmured, the words coming out slowly due to my concentration on other matters. Alice's hands stopped their exploring and were soon removed from my skin. I sighed sadly and opened my eyes. She was looking intently at me with an expression I couldn't understand. Just as I was about to get nervous in the silence, she spoke.

"You want me to stay the night?"

I nodded, feeling my throat becoming dry. "Is that…is that too much to ask? I mean, I know about the heat thing but you don't seem to sleep anyway." I gestured to the bags beneath her eyes and she nodded. "And, you seem to like watching me sleep. I guess I'm inviting you to watch me sleep. That sounds super bad but that's what I'm doing. If you want to, though." I sighed again, trying to figure out why I wasn't so totally weirded out by what I'd just asked this essential stranger to do. But no idea came to me. No idea except for the fact that I trusted this vampire. I trusted this girl.

"I-I do want to, Bella. Are you sure that's what you want? I know this is a lot to take in and-

"It's what I want. I don't want you to go yet."

"Okay then, I'll stay," Alice answered with a nod. "But, on the condition that you meet my family tomorrow?" I swallowed hard and looked at her intently.

"Your…family?" I asked as images of the glowering Rosalie and Edward came into my mind. Alice nodded and grasped my hands this time and holding them tightly.

"They're nice, Bella, really they are. They just have a sort of…image to uphold at the school. They'll love you, really. And I'll be with you the entire time."

My mouth opened and closed for a few minutes as I wagered the deal in my head. On the whole it didn't seem too bad. Especially if Alice was going to be there with me. And from what I'd experienced Carlisle had never been particularly cruel or malicious to me. "That…seems fair," I said finally, relieved that I was finally able to master the art of closing my mouth. The pixie smiled at me and released my hands to embrace me. I felt the tiny pricks of her spiked hair on my cheek and could smell the hair gel mixed her own scent and sighed, hugging her back. Alice was the first to let go and she laughed as she brushed my hair behind my ear.

"Thank you, Bella. You won't regret it. I know they're going to love you, really." She started the car and I listened to the smooth and easy sound that came with it. I really need to be able to afford a car like this eventually. Alice looked behind her once and then threw the car into the highway with an amazing ease. She seemed to know everything about the car and could do exactly what it took to make it run perfectly. Of course, she was about seven when the first car was even invented so it made sense. As we headed down the highway towards my house Alice drastically increased speed. When the trees were flying by in blurs I finally dared myself to look at the speedometer. 115. Holy shit. "I'll drop you off at your front door and then I'll run the car home and head back, okay? I shouldn't be more than fifteen minutes. Just leave your window unlocked." Alice said after a bit, turning to wink at me. I nodded, thankful that she had taken my mind off of her driving.

"I always leave my window unlocked," I muttered.

"I know." Alice's eyes met mine for a moment and we both giggled like little schoolgirls. It was…nice. I had never really had a friend like this before. Granted, Alice was quite a new friend but I felt comfortable around her. And while I'd had friends, I'd never really shared anything deep with them. With Alice I felt like I could should the time arise. And that feeling was…comforting. The rest of the drive was silent, but comfortable and Alice killed the lights as she pulled the car into the driveway. As I was about to say goodbye, she closed her eyes and rested her head against the seat. Before I could work up the courage to ask her what she was doing, she opened her eyes and smiled. "Charlie's not going to wake up. You left the back door unlocked so head through there."

"That's too cool," I said as I opened the car door.

"It comes in handy sometimes. I'll see you in a minute."

"In a minute," I repeated before returning her smile and shutting the door quietly. Alice waited in the driveway until I'd made it to the back of the house. Then she threw her hand out the window and waved. I returned it and watched as she reversed out of the driveway before I finally headed inside. Though I trusted Alice's word I still watched my step as I headed up the stairs. As she predicted, I made it to my room safe and sound and closed the door behind me. In the short time I had before Alice arrived I changed into a softer long sleeved shirt and sweat pants. Okay, so maybe I was hoping that Alice would be near enough to make me cold. Sue me. Once I was changed I checked the window and climbed into bed.

As soon as my head made contact with the pillow I heaved a huge sigh. My brain finally felt at ease. There was no more real confusion or doubt and that was more relieving than I ever thought it could have been. Alice didn't hate me, I wasn't crazy and it looked like I was getting a new friend out of the deal. I couldn't complain with that.

A tapping noise could be heard at my window but by the time I'd turned to see it, it was already opened and the blinds were blowing in the wind. I frowned and turned to look around my room, only to discover that Alice was already at the foot of my bed. I gasped, then put a hand over my mouth to muffle my laughter. Alice smiled and her white teeth practically glowed in the dark. I sat up on my elbows and shrugged. "What do you usually do when I sleep?" I whispered. Alice smiled again and gestured to the small desk chair before she turned it to face the bed.

"You just sit there and watch all night?" She nodded and I smiled before patting my bed. "You can sleep here, on top of the covers so it doesn't get so hot." Alice twitched just a bit and paused before she slowly made her way over to the left side of my bed. Instead of getting on the bed like I thought, she crouched down beside it and rested her elbows on the mattress.

"Are you sure, Bella? It probably won't be very comfortable with me on top of the covers."

"I'm sure, Alice. I don't think I'll be sleeping much tonight anyway." Alice furrowed her brow for a moment, in thought, before she finally sighed and laid herself on the bed. We faced each other for a moment and I could feel the coolness radiating from her and the open window combined. Alice frowned as she stared at me and brushed her thumb on my lip.

"Are you sure you're not too cold? I can get up and close the window." I shook my head and motioned to my long sleeves before turning around to where my back was pressed against her front.

"I like you just where you are," I murmured, my eyes heavy with a sleep I thought wouldn't come tonight. Alice exhaled softly from behind me and I felt a tentative arm cross over my torso and rest itself against me. I smiled, knowing Alice couldn't see it, and placed a hand over hers before sleep finally overtook me.


	12. Chapter 12

Virgin Sacrifice

I couldn't breathe. My mouth was agape, gasping, but no air was coming in. In an instant my eyes flew open and I sat up, instinctively ripping the sweatshirt off of my soaked body. The air from the open window hit my skin immediately and I welcomed the goosebumps that rippled over my body. I breathed again and this time my lungs were filled with fresh, dry air. Finally coming out of my asphyxiated stupor, I ran a hand through my hair and groaned as it was sticky with sweat. It was at this time that I noticed just how sweaty I was and groaned again. While my torso had dried thanks to the fresh air from the window, my hair felt like I'd just stepped out of the shower and I could feel drops of perspiration dripping down into the crease of my knee. If there was one thing I hated, it was being sweaty. Perhaps that was why I hated physical recreation. However, at the moment I couldn't bring myself to care about physical recreation. All I could focus on was the fact that my legs were still sweating and I tore my sweatpants off also. Finally exposed, drying and cold, my mind was cleared entirely. And then only one thought could occupy it.

Alice.

Where was she? Given my recent struggle with sheets and covers she was not on my bed and I didn't hear a thud that indicated I had thrown her to the floor. She didn't leave did she? Just before I was about to panic, a voice whispered to me from the corner of the room.

"I'm here, Bella."

I quickly whipped my head to the left and my eyes focused on the shadowy figure resting in my desk chair. The window was opened only a crack now and she looked to have taken her jacket off as well, sitting by the wind in nothing but a tank top. Golden eyes seemed to glow at me and made me a bit nervous. Her skin was painfully pale and I stared at it for a moment, noting that she didn't seem to have a single blemish on her body. It made sense of course, but it was still kind of hard to grasp. I glanced down on my own arm and in about 2 seconds counted seven freckles. They looked so normal; I liked it. Not that I didn't like Alice's skin but it, like her, was simply different.

"Why are you over there?" I asked, leaning over to be closer to her, even if by only a few inches. Her teeth appeared to me in the night as she smiled before speaking.

"I sort of got paranoid and thought you were freezing, so I came over here and closed the window a bit." She paused then and inhaled before giving me a look I couldn't quite decipher in the darkness. "Though, judging by your recent actions I'd say that was a bad idea." Her bright eyes travelled lower and I blushed, pulling the sheets over me out of instinct. Alice grasped the point quickly and looked at me again. "Maybe I should go, for real."

"No, Alice, don't go," I urged, the covers falling as I swung my legs over to the side of the bed. I really shouldn't have been this comfortable half naked and with a vampire/succubus thing but my modesty seemed to be worth sacrificing in order to keep her to stay. Alice's eyes hastily looked me over before she turned away, covering her mouth with her hand in thought. I found my sweatshirt on the floor and pulled it on as I headed over to the shorter girl, crouching by the chair she was sitting in. Saying these next few words without sounding like a total creeper was going to be a difficult task. But Alice looked so forlorn that I didn't know what else to do in the current situation. Honesty always seemed to be the best policy with her, so I let her have it.

"I might have…sort of, put on these hot clothes on the off chance that you would sleep with me tonight. I mean, like, sleep next to. Not like…" I drifted, fuming from head to toe in embarrassment, and ran a hand through my hair. Alice smiled and nodded.

"Truth be told, I was kind of hoping that was a factor but…" she too, drifted and looked down to watch her hands entwine with themselves. I waited for a bit to see if she would continue and when she didn't, I leaned forward and gently rested my head on her thigh, making sure that my hair was between the two. I didn't know if my hair would do anything to deter my body heat but it couldn't hurt. I felt the weight of her hand on my head a few moments later and smiled and how comfortable I was. We sat like that for a few moments in silence before Alice finally removed her hand, causing me to look up at her. When I did I noticed that she was staring at me with hard eyes and a furrowed brow.

"Bella I…I feel like I need to know what's happening here."

"Shouldn't you know what's happening here? Or what's going to be happening here?" I touched my head and she blinked a few times. There was silence again and this was one I did not want to break. While I had an inkling of what she was talking about, I wasn't about to further the conversation. Alice brought it up, she could finish it. At least, I hoped she'd finish it. The vampire took a deep breath and rolled her eyes before facing me again.

"It's strange for everything to be so new. Things have been a functional cycle for so long that it's a hard habit to break, or something. Most likely I'm being cowardly." She laughed awkwardly and I smiled as best as I could at her, wanting to take her hand but resisting. "Okay," Alice blurted finally, seemingly coming up with what she wanted to say. Instead of speaking, however, she stood up and took my hands, lifting me up into an embrace. I smiled as I felt the pixie's arms around me and sighed into her shoulder. Alice let her hands linger for a few moments more before she pulled away, bringing one hand back to rest on the back of her neck.

"I'm going to let you decide," she said finally and with a single nod. "I'm just going to say that I know that this is new for you. And either we can just ease into it, take it as it comes…or you can decide to talk about it, and we'll have an entire Dr. Phil special about it." She smiled and reached for my hands again, waiting patiently for my response.

Truthfully, I would have been satisfied if this talk had never happened. It was always my intention to just take things with this girl as they came. I was always a better kinesthetic learner anyway. Talking never did much for me. But, it also seemed like I was in a bit of denial as well. Deep down, I knew I'd been dreading this talk, no matter how vague Alice had made it. And even though I knew what she felt for me (because I reciprocated it) it didn't deny the fact that I was having feelings towards another woman. Not that I hadn't felt these feelings for other women before. But this, if it progressed, was going to be the first relationship I'd ever had. Ever. Man or woman.

I'd been raised primarily by my mother, who had a couple of gay friends and sometimes I would listen to them talk about rights and freedom and love and I agreed with it all. And I knew that almost all of my generation were accepting or at the very least tolerant of same sex relationships. But even then, this was a big, strikingly new step for me, for anyone to take. I sighed, wondering how my small town father would take it and if my mother would still accept it if it was her own child that was gay. Alice smiled at me, still being patient and I returned it as her words rang through my head. Just take it as it comes. Eventually, I thought, it would all have to work itself out. And if it ended for better or for worse, it was a risk I was willing to take for the woman standing in front of me.

"I'd like to just go with the flow, Alice. Slowly, if you don't mind." Her grin widened and she bit the corner of her bottom lip in her teeth in the most adorable fashion.

"That's great. Perfect, even."

She then leaned in and hugged me again. And while I still enjoyed it, I felt, from her movements, that this was simply a friendly hug and embraced her thankfully. It was weird, feeling that with a vampire around that you were safe. But new things were happening right and left in this backward town and it probably did me no good to sit and dwell on them. Alice released me a few moments later and gestured to the clock on my bedside table.

"It's still early, Bella. Why don't you try for a little more sleep?"she asked me as she headed over to the sheets and placed them back on the bed, folded over for me to climb into. I nodded, the mentioning of sleep awaking the fatigue within me and crawled eagerly into bed. Though I was going to ask her to join me, Alice climbed on the bed after me without hesitation. We got in the same position as before, with her arm draped lazily over me and before I could really note just how content I was, I was asleep.

0-0-0-0-0

"Bella? Hey, Bells?"

I woke up suddenly, and instantly noticed that I was alone in my bed. The voice that I heard wasn't Alice's and I rubbed my eyes to help them focus on the figure in my doorway. Charlie was looking down at me with a sympathetic smile on his face. "Morning, Bells. I was just wondering if you felt up for school this morning?" I returned his smile and stretched under the covers. Alice must have been hiding from my father. It was kind of humorous.

"I don't think so, dad, if that's okay. I'm still feeling a little out of it."

"That's fine. I already called the school," he answered with a chuckle. "They seemed to understand too. The kid driving the van isn't coming in either and of course Alice is out for a while. Say, did you get to see her yesterday? How's she doing?" Charlie's eyes widened a bit as he took another step inside of the door. I shrugged, trying to figure out what kind of reaction would be most appealing and less fishy.

"Well, she was sleeping when I went to see her but Dr. Cullen said that she was out of surgery and would be released soon. He said if I wanted to I could come back and see her. I might do that later today." Charlie nodded.

"That'd be nice of you, Bells. I'll give the doctor a call today and see if he needs anything. Now, I don't want to hear that you were playing hooky and goofing around somewhere, okay? You can leave this house only to visit Alice or head to school. Understand?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. Do you need anything before I go?"

"No, I'm fine. Have a good day at work."

"Thanks, Bells. Feel better." He then gave me a single nod and closed the door behind him. I listened for his footsteps down the stairs and a moment later the front door opened and closed. Not a second after the front door shut, my closet opened and out stepped Alice. She appeared to be in new clothes from last night and was smiling from ear to ear.

"Good morning, Bella. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, thanks, Alice. Did you?"

"We don't sleep."

"Oh, my bad."

She shrugged and turned to face my closet. I studied her cute designer jeans and top and smirked as I could practically see her scowling at my own meager supply of cheap, comfortable clothes. "Well, I was going to pick an outfit out for you but…they're all the same. So, I'll leave you to get changed. See you downstairs, yeah?"

"Sure, but I think I'm gonna have a quick shower."

"No problem. I'll be waiting." She smiled again and touched my reddened cheeks before heading out of the door. After grabbing a change of clothes I headed into the bathroom and jumped into the shower. I spent a lot of time scrubbing without soap and washed my hair twice. If my scent was super alluring, it'd be best to try and make it as subtle as possible for my first meeting with a family of vampires. Once out of the shower I quickly ran a brush through my hair and tried to make myself look as presentable as possible. And while my calm reflection fooled even me, I was a nervous wreck on the inside. I was meeting a family of super beautiful, super inhuman vampires. That was intimidation for you. When I finally looked as best as I possibly could I headed down the stairs where Alice, as she'd said, was waiting for me on the couch. She lifted her nose in the air as I entered and smiled.

"You don't smell as strongly. Was that your intent?"

"Maybe,"

Alice laughed and rose from the couch. "Well, that's probably a nice idea. Though, when I say as strongly, that doesn't mean that it's still not strong." She then headed around the couch and came to stand near me. "While you were in the shower I called my family and they're thrilled that you're coming. In fact, Esme, my mother, would like to cook lunch for you. Is that alright?"

"You guys can cook?"

"Well…no, but she wants to cook for you. Or she wants to use the kitchen. Probably a little bit of both."

"Sure, that'd be fine. Wait, would I eat it alone?"

Alice thought for a moment, then her face changed expressions as she realized my meaning. "Yes, you would. I know! I'll call her back and ask her to make it to go. No, better idea: Let's head over now and you can help her cook to go." She turned to head to the phone then stopped, shaking her head and turning back to me. "I'm so sorry, Bella. Would that be okay with you? I didn't think to ask and that's horrible of me."

I smiled, shaking my head. "It's fine, Alice. I like cooking. And it would be a bonding experience…or something." Alice grinned and bounded to the phone. I watched as she dialed the number with astonishing speed. When the other end of the line picked up she began speaking so quickly that I from where I stood it sounded like a muffled mumble. It was interesting to watch. When she hung up the phone she bounded over ecstatically to me.

"Esme loves the idea. Are you ready to leave now?"

"Sure, I guess."

"Great. May I drive your truck?"

"So long as you don't force the speed. It's not an Infinite, you know?"

"I know," Alice said with a wink before grabbing the keys, my hand, and pulling me out the door. She opened the passenger door for me and helped me up, which was strange but nice at the same time. Then she bounded over to the driver's side and leaped in effortlessly, starting up the truck. "I like this truck," she said absently as she pulled out of the driveway. "It's…antique. Reminds me of the time of when this truck was in style, not nostalgically so."

"You remember that?"

"The fifties and sixties? Sure. I remember everything since I've been changed. I guess being a vampire also gives you a wonderful memory."

"I could sure use one of those," I muttered, thinking of my own sloppy memory. Alice didn't respond and when I looked over at her she looked like I'd just told an offensive joke.

"Did I say something wrong?" I asked softly. Alice turned to me quickly and shook her head.

"Oh, no of course not, Bella. I was just thinking about something." She smiled and shifted gears in the truck. It groaned as it sped up and I watched the excitement in her eyes and knew that she was serious about me not saying anything wrong. It was nice to be with someone as expressive as her. We drove in silence for a bit and I noticed that Alice kept the truck at a smooth 45 mph. While it was taking a little long to get to her house, it was worth it because she'd listened to what I said about the speed.

"So, is there anything I need to expect?" I asked as Alice turned down the road that headed to their house. We were about five minutes away now. Alice sighed and licked her lips for a moment as she thought.

"Well, you do smell very intoxicating. And while there is no danger," she looked right at me as she said it to emphasize her point, "they might be a bit hesitant around you. Except for Carlisle. Carlisle's as human as it comes when it comes to blood. And Esme will probably smother you. She's the sweetest person, Bella. Rosalie…" She sighed, looking up at the roof of my truck. "Rosalie is not as she seems to you. It's not my place to tell you why but just know that she means well. She does. And Edward will scowl. He scowls because he reads minds, but cannot read yours. And that frustrates him, much to my amusement.

"And Emmett, Rose's husband, is just a big friendly bear. He might play a prank on your or joke around with you and while he can take things a bit too far, he's just trying to be nice. Does that sound alright, still? If you're not comfortable, I can take you back," Alice offered as we pulled up at the house. She kept it running to prove her point and looked over at me. And while I could tell that she was serious, a part of me kind of wanted to meet the family. If nothing else, that they were a part of Alice's life.

"No, I'm fine. A part of me might be looking forward to it." Alice broke into a large grin again and laughed.

"Great! Let the virgin sacrifice begin!" she shouted as she jumped out of the car and ran over to my side.

"That was a joke, right?" I asked as she helped me down.

Alice said nothing but merely winked as she led me to the door, which opened and revealed 5 hungry-looking vampires.


	13. Chapter 13

Simple Spaghetti

Okay, so maybe they weren't hungry looking but still, they were very intimidating. I mean, they were all gorgeous, smart and rich. And I was Bella freaking Swan. Alice must have noticed the deep breath that I took because she put her arm around my shoulders and gave them a squeeze before leading me up the steps to where they awaited. I recognized them all instantly, although Alice's mother, Esme was the most foreign. Surprisingly, however, her face was also the most welcoming. Her grin seemed to widen with every step I took that brought me closer and when I was finally close enough she lunged forward and embraced me. I thought it would hurt but Esme seemed to know what she was doing and I smiled as I felt some of my nerves dissipating. Esme, like Alice, smelled wonderful and her while some parents tried too hard to be appeasing, the task seemed to come naturally to her.

"It's great to meet you, Bella. I've been waiting for this day, when we could have a human over for lunch."

It was then that Emmett guffawed. Alice's giggling could be heard next to my ear and I smiled politely, reinforcing my mind of what Esme really meant. Or at least, what I thought she meant. Emmett was still laughing too hard in my opinion and I glanced over at him. He was even bigger this close up and I could see the well defined muscles under his tight shirt and the veins that braided his arms. It was impressive, I had to admit. But he was a bit too muscular for me and I turned back to Esme who had seemed to realize the error of her wording. Her face fell for a moment and I felt the nerves coming back, along with the desire to hug this woman who was practically a stranger.

"I didn't mean that, Bella," she said, regaining the smile although it was much duller than before. I shook my head at her and shrugged.

"I got what you meant, ma'am. Alice has told me things, and I'm not worried. I've been looking forward to meeting you," I answered coolly, surprising even myself at how much I believed them. It was then that Esme brightened to her old self and took my arm to lead me into the house. It was cold. I mean, I should have expected that but I didn't expect for it to be that cold. It couldn't have been fifty degrees in the home and I felt goosebumps arise on my arm as I followed Esme. She must have noticed something changed for she stopped and looked at my bumpy arm. Then she 'tsk'-ed in a motherly manner and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Bella. Alice should have told you to bring a jacket."

Before I could respond Alice was by my side again. She smiled up at me and pushed my jacket that I didn't know that I'd brought into my waist. "I've got it covered, mom," she said endearingly as I put the jacket on, feeling better instantly. Esme said something that I didn't catch in the ruffle of the fabric and when I'd finally zipped up the jacket and was able to look around, I realized I was the center of attention. Even if Esme was a joy, it was still daunting to see all of them standing there, staring at me, although Edward seemed to have disappeared. Alice was by my side so I could only see her from my peripheral and Rosalie was dead across from me. Her expression was something like curious anger. Maybe she just liked to scowl. Maybe she didn't give a damn about me and I was being conceited. Judging by the way things were going between her and me I would probably never know. Emmett was next to her, relaxed, and appeared to be off in another world. Carlisle and Esme were off to the side, looking at me rather endearingly. It was a bit too much to handle. My cheeks reddened but due to the cold it wasn't severe and I sighed in relief as I gathered my voice back.

"Um, you were kidding about the virgin sacrifice, right, Alice?" I half-joked before turning to the pixie. Before she could answer, Emmett guffawed again. I say guffaw because laugh just doesn't cut it. Emmett was the guy that liked to bust a gut on any and every occasion it seemed. When he finished, he straightened from his doubled over position and stepped forward, extending his hand.

"Yeah, we might be kind of new at this. I'm Emmett," he said, taking my hand. I have expected there to be a joy buzzer attached to it but there was none and he took my hand gently. "I enjoy long walks on the beach and a cool pint of O negative on a regular basis. When I'm not sleeping in my coffin I like to-

"Emmett!" Esme hushed in a tone that any child would recognize. It was an honest to goodness warning that she was serious about. Emmett shrugged, his cocky demeanor falling to his mother's rule and he mumbled some sort of apology. It was quiet again and Alice sighed next to me.

"I'm sorry, Bella. This is too much for you, isn't it?" she asked, lowering her head. Everyone seemed to do an awkward shuffle and I felt the nerves creeping back. Why was this blood thing such a big deal? I knew about it. They weren't going to kill me. Couldn't we just move on? And why the hell wasn't I saying this out loud?

"No, Alice, this is fine. But, if I may say something…" I ventured, looking to the parents. They nodded almost too eagerly and I took a deep breath, rubbing my still cold hands together. "Okay, so if I can just be blunt here, I know what you are. I know what you are capable of. I also know that you don't drink human blood and that you've no intention to hurt me. I've pretty much accepted that. And if it's easier for everyone, I'd like to take this whole vampire thing like Emmett did. Can we just be casual and lighthearted about it?"

It was quiet for a few seconds after that and for a moment I worried that I had crossed some line. Then Alice appeared next to me and gave me a quick hug. "You're the coolest human ever," she whispered as she released me. Esme and Carlisle laughed as Emmett clapped.

"Bella for president!" he shouted, raising his fist. Rosalie rolled her eyes and pulled him back to her. I watched as subtly as I could as she spoke to him too quickly for me to understand. He seemed to understand what she was saying and while he still appeared eager, there was something different about him. Before I could dwell on it, her eyes met mine and I quickly looked away, laying my eyes on Carlisle again. He was standing before me with that same sincere smile.

"Are you hungry, Bella? Esme would like to get started on cooking if that's okay."

"Oh, sure," I answered before following him into the kitchen. Rosalie and Emmett followed behind me and took a seat at the bar. It was an extremely nice kitchen with white marble countertops and black shelves and stainless steel appliances. The counters went around the side of the house while there was a large island in the middle of the kitchen that appeared to have the stove and another working station near it. It was very modern and very clean and beautiful. It was like it was my dream kitchen. Alice bounded past me and grabbed a loaf of bread that was sitting on the counter.

"I want to do the bread," she said with a grin as she began working on the twine of the loaf. Esme nodded at her and then looked to me.

"Where should we start?" she asked, before motioning to the groceries that she'd purchased. I headed over to them and noticed spaghetti noodles, instant pasta sauce, a pound of hamburger meat, butter, garlic and assorted vegetables. Simple spaghetti. Even I couldn't mess this up. I nodded at the food and then turned to see that all of the Cullens were staring at me. They were waiting for my commands. Now this was a strange feeling: Being the boss of a bunch of vampires, even if it was just cooking simple spaghetti.

"Okay, someone needs to cook the beef while someone needs to boil the noodles. Someone needs to chop the vegetables for the salad and someone else, Alice, rather, needs to butter the bread. Looks like there's a job for everyone. Esme, do you have a pot for the spaghetti?" The mother nodded and reached under the sink to pull out a good sized pot. I turned on the stove and filled the pot with water and washed my hands as the stove heated up. After showing Esme how to break the noodles I set her to work watching them boiling and stirring. Carlisle had gotten a skillet out and as it was heating I gave him instructions for the meat. Alice was already at work buttering bread so I merely turned on the oven before heading over to the bar where Rosalie and Emmett were waiting. Emmett was holding a large carving knife and I noticed that a smaller knife also sat next to Rosalie.

"Would you, um, like to chop vegetables? If not, I can…" I said awkwardly, because Rosalie had that effect on me. She raised her brow at me and picked up the knife, absently jabbing it into her thumb.

"I don't think we can risk you cutting yourself. Then we'd have to add our own special sauce to the pasta," she murmured, her eyes running across mine as she said so. Before I had time to guess if she was serious or not, Emmett chuckled and nudged her. She appeared to be holding back her smile but looked over at him endearingly. It was…sweet to see, even if I still wasn't sure if Rosalie was serious or not. I smiled at the both of them and passed out the tomatoes, cucumbers and carrots, instructing them the best way to chop them for a salad. They set to work meticulously, as if they'd never done this before. Surely they'd taken a home economics course over the years.

"Oh this is so fun!" Esme called as she stirred the bubbling pasta. The bubbles began to rise and her eyes widened in surprise as she looked to me for help. I couldn't help but giggle as I headed over to her and blew on the bubbles, causing them to disappear.

"That's kind of the fun part of spaghetti," I said as she nodded and looked back to the pot. After that it was quiet for a bit. Everyone seemed content in their job and it was…nice. I couldn't help but enjoy myself just in sitting there watching them all. After a few minutes of silence, I began to get restless and headed over to Alice who was absolutely fixated on the bread.

"So, where's Edward?" I asked as casually as I could muster. I knew that I'd seen him in the doorway when I first came in but soon after he was gone. It was a bit disconcerting. It made me feel like he was watching somehow, in a way that wasn't flattering. Alice rolled her eyes but then flashed me a smile as she turned to grab the garlic.

"Oh Edward…. He enjoys the dramatics. He says you smell too powerfully for him to be around you. I'm supposed to give you his apologies but it must have slipped my mind." Her eyes then darted to her sister and they shared similar looks of interest. As if on cue, a piano started playing somewhere, and there could only be one culprit. I watched as Alice shrugged and gestured towards the sound. "I guess he's going to serenade us instead," she laughed before going back to the bread. I glanced to the hallway and saw nothing, though the sound was coming through clearly. There was something super weird about Edward and while I was hopeful to meeting him and maybe starting anew, I couldn't help but like the fact that he wasn't here. I decided to drop the subject and Carlisle picked one up for me.

"So, Bella, how is it down there in Arizona? I'm sorry to say we've never been," he asked as he began to open the pasta sauce and pour it in the skillet.

"Oh, you're not missing much," I answered, heading over to check the meat, which looked to be finely cooked. "It's hot, dry, dead and inhabited by Mormons." Emmett could be heard chuckling behind me and I smirked over at him as Carlisle stirred the skillet.

"I thought the Mormons had picked Utah as the holy land."

"Well, Arizonians like to consider our state 'Little Utah.' I don't have anything against them personally; it's just kind of boring with all of them there."

"You like to party and swear and such?"

"No, but I'd like to be able to without getting preached at." Carlisle nodded understandingly.

"What about you guys, if I may? I mean, I know that the cover is that you're adopted. Is that the real story?"

"Yes and no," Alice called as she began placing the bread on an oven sheet. I grabbed some aluminum that Esme had bought and helped her cover the oven sheet first. "We're not blood related, but we do consider ourselves a family, as is also the cover. Carlisle found us all some way or another and we became a part of his family. We're not a cult, I swear." She smiled at me and while I wanted her to elaborate, something told me that that discussion was best left for a later day.

It was then that Esme called to me that she thought the noodles were done. She grabbed a colander and followed me over to the sink. I poured the noodles out as she watched and felt the steam running into my face. As it did so, I began to feel a little bit dizzy. All of the heat coming from the kitchen mixed with my jacket and this face full of steam was too much even for the chilling home. Something I was doing must have caught the Cullen's attention for the pot was taken from my hands and Alice's arm was around my waist, steadying me. The music had stopped.

"What's the matter, Bella?" she whispered, placing her hands on my cheeks. I welcomed the rush of cool that they brought to me and began working on removing my jacket. Alice helped my arms out of the sleeves and cradled the jacket close to her, as if she didn't know what to do. I placed a hand on my throbbing head.

"I'm just a bit too hot, I think. Do you mind if I step outside for a minute?" I asked as politely as I could. Alice nodded and I slowly untangled myself from her grasp and headed towards the door that looked like it led to a balcony of some sort.

"Do you need me to go with you?" I heard the pixie calling from behind me. And while I did want her to come with me, I didn't want anyone to worry by my accepting her offer. I also didn't want to come across as super weak. There was nothing to do but decline.

"No, thank you. I'll just be a second. You'll need to put the bread in the oven for a few minutes. You might want to watch it and see when it browns a bit." She nodded at me and I crossed behind the bar to where the door was. I felt everyone's eyes on me as I went but did my best to ignore them. The most prominent, probably because I was right next to her, was Rosalie. I didn't like it when she looked at me like that. Mostly because I couldn't read it. My feet tangled momentarily as I made it to the door and I fell forward a bit before I caught myself. as I reached for the doorknob I dared a glance back at Rosalie and noticed that she was turned to face me, one hand gripping the bar as if any moment she would leap at me. I definitely didn't like that so I opened the door without any more hesitation and stepped outside.

The moment that the cool mountain air hit me I sighed and stepped towards the railing. It was a dark colored metal and was cool on my hands. Goosebumps fell upon my skin and I relished them as I my head began to clear. A light mist was falling and contradicted the sweat that had formed on my body. A bird chirped somewhere in the distance and the leaves shifted in the wind. And as of that moment, I was completely at ease.

"Good afternoon, Bella."

Dammit.

I turned, slapped awake from my ease and came face to face with the famous Edward. He was in a long black sleeved shirt and dark denim jeans. European shoes looked to be on his feet and his hair still defied gravity in a not cool way. "Hi, Edward," I answered, closing my eyes to try to find my happy place again. But the grouchy male Cullen seemed to have other ideas.

"I'm sorry for not introducing myself properly. And for acting like a royal ass." He ran a hand through his hair and it all swooped to the side like a gnarly version of Willy Wonka. It would have been funnier were I not so scared and annoyed with him at the same time. He extended his hand to me and I took it cautiously. His grip was tighter than Emmett's, which surprised me, but it still didn't hurt. "I'm Edward, Alice's brother."

"I'm…well, you know who I am."

"Yes, I do." He flashed a crooked smile and I decided I didn't like it. Crooked smiles were awkward and weird. It was quiet for a few minutes and since my happy place was nowhere to be found anymore I took to staring straight ahead. Though I could feel his eyes upon me. These people sure liked to stare. When it finally became too much to bear, I turned back to face him.

"I thought my blood was too much to handle. Why are you here?"

"It's better outside. And I thought I should come and apologize."

"You've done that."

"You didn't really accept it."

"A handshake doesn't constitute acceptation?"

"Oh, well I guess so."

I nodded, feeling somewhat prideful that he'd actually relinquished to me. Since I seemed to have the upper hand on the conversation I might as well continue. "So, Alice tells me you can't read my mind…"

"That's true."

"Why is that?"

"I wish I knew. It's been bothering me ever since I've laid eyes on you." He paused and I watched as his eyes scanned my face. "You really are beautiful."

"Woah," I answered instantly, stepping back. Talk about coming out of left field. My cheeks reddened as they usually did and I looked to the ground, mumbling some sort of awkward thanks. He nodded and stepped towards me.

"I didn't mean to upset you. I just seem to be sort of overcome in your presence." He stepped forward again and I felt a cold presence on my cheek that better have been his hand and nothing else. I jumped back instantly and shook my head. He was trying to be nice. And he appeared to have a crush on me. I got that. But I didn't want him touching me. The only person that could touch me like that was in the kitchen making garlic bread. And something told me that Edward knew that, but persisted anyway. I hated that.

"I'd prefer if you didn't do that," I mumbled, knowing that he'd hear. "And if you don't mind, I'm going to head back inside. I need to help Alice." I enunciated the name, meeting his eyes as I said it. He formed that famous glower and grabbed the railing next to him tightly.

"Look, Bella, I know that you and Alice are friends or something. But she's not telling you the whole story. She's my sister, and a good person, but I don't want this to progress without you knowing the truth." He placed his hand on my arm and I jerked away, my patience lost.

"My friendship with Alice isn't your business. If she's got something to tell me, she'll tell me in good time. I don't need you telling me something that's not your place and acting like a creeper. Now I'm going to make spaghetti and if you're not going to eat some, don't follow me." Before waiting for a response, I went to the door and pulled it open, heading inside. When I shut it behind me I saw him walking away and smirked to myself before turning back to the family. Esme was grinning broadly at me and next to her was a giant plate of spaghetti. Steaming garlic bread was next to it along with a glorious looking salad. It looked and smelled wonderful and my stomach growled at the sight.

"Now Alice has informed us that you'd rather not eat here, which is understandable but we just thought we'd make it look presentable before we packed it up for you," Esme said, putting on a Vanna White routine by presenting the food with her hands. I returned the smile and headed over to her, feeling more than comfortable by hugging her.

"Thank you, Esme. It looks better than anything I've ever made." She laughed humbly and Carlisle patted me on the back. Emmett sat staring at the salad like it was the greatest creation he'd ever made and even Rosalie looked a little happy with herself. And just as I noticed that Alice wasn't in the room, she came up behind me and threw her arms around me.

"I'm so thrilled that you like it!" she squealed a little too loudly in my ear. I laughed, thankful that I'd kept my balance during her actions. She then let go of me and ran to the table, grabbing a piece of bread from the plate and handing it to me. "Just one taste, to make sure it's not poisoned or something."

"Wouldn't you know if it was poisoned, Alice?" She winked at me and I took a bite of the bread. There was a bit too much butter on it for my tastes but it in no way was bad tasting and when I told her so she hugged me again. I finished the piece of bread, which calmed my ravenous stomach for the time being and helped them pack everything into Tupperware. In the end there was so much food that Esme had to give me a bag to carry it all in. From there Alice and I were led to the door. Esme embraced me again and I noticed her inhale strongly as she did so. While it felt harmless enough, it was still very predatory and made me thankful that I was leaving. The last thing I wanted to do was overstay my welcome in a house full of vampires. Carlisle also gave me a hug and Emmett swooped me up in an all too fitting bear hug. I didn't expect much from Rosalie and wasn't given much, but she didn't seem to be all that bitter anymore. She gave me a simple nod and I smiled back at her. Edward had not returned and I was okay with that.

Alice carried the bag for me out to my truck, despite my protests, and loaded them up for me as I climbed into the driver's seat. Once she was finished she headed around to my side where I had the window already rolled down. She had to stand on her toes to be even close to eye level with me and I grinned at how cute it all looked. "Don't forget your jacket," she said softly, handing it through the window. I grabbed it and threw it absently next to me.

"Thanks. I really liked this visit."

"I'm glad you did. Feel free to stop by any time."

"Good to know. Of course, now, it's your turn to officially meet Charlie."

"I've already met Charlie, silly."

"But not as my friend you haven't."

"Very true," Alice laughed, resting her chin on her forearms.

"Are you going to visit tonight?" I asked, not so shyly anymore. She smiled and tilted her head to the side.

"Believe me, Bella, I want to. But more than that I want you to get a good night's sleep. So I think I'll stay here tonight. But maybe tomorrow."

"Yeah, that's good. Give me a call, maybe?"

She nodded and her eyes glanced past me. I turned to find that the rest of the Cullens had gone inside the house. By the time I turned back around, Alice was somehow taller, eye level with me, and before I could figure out how, she was kissing me. It was short. Chaste and cold, but just enough… for now, anyway. Alice pulled away and left with the both of us smiling. She watched as I pulled out of the driveway and while I felt giddy as hell, I couldn't shake the thought of Edward's words and what Alice could possibly be hiding from me.


	14. Chapter 14

High Score

My thoughts had slowed by the time I turned onto my block. However that didn't mean that they were any less jumbled than before. Alice's kiss was awesome and I rather enjoyed replaying that in my mind, though Edward's voice over began just as our lips met…every time. I kept trying to remind myself that I didn't care about what he said. Whatever he was trying to be cryptic about wasn't getting to me. While it had taken some persuasion, Alice had been extremely honest to me. It wouldn't be fair to doubt her over a brooding and, not to be conceited but, jealous brother. Was it really conceited if it was true? I shrugged absently in my seat, pulling the groaning truck into the driveway. I had to stop short, however, as there was another truck in my way. It looked vaguely familiar, this beaten down thing, but I couldn't quite place it. As I looked down to undo my seatbelt I heard the screen door slam and looked up to see Charlie bounding towards me. He must have read the strange expression I held for he smiled and opened my door for me.

"I came home for lunch to check on you. Hadn't even gotten halfway up the stairs before I heard your truck in the drive. Feeling dizzy or anything?"

"No," I answered, grabbing the sack of food and extending it to him. "I went to Alice's. She's at home now, healing, and her mom made us some lunch. I hope you haven't eaten yet."

Charlie looked in the bag and shifted the Tupperware around a little, gaining a better look at their contents. Then he nodded approvingly and offered a free hand to help me down, which I took. "Well, I doubt this will be as good as your cooking but it certainly can't be bad. The Black's are here, too, Bella. They heard about the car accident and they came to check up on you. Are you feeling well enough to see them?"

"Of course, dad. Seriously, I'm not hurt. It's all fine." Charlie nodded though I could tell he wasn't convinced and lead the way into the house. Jacob and his father, Billy, were sitting on the couch as I entered and Jacob stood before the door had even closed behind me. He smiled, looking me over as if he expected me to look terrible. Then he stepped forward almost awkwardly, extending his arms. I accepted his hug with equal awkwardness, feeling the warmth of his chest beneath his shirt.

"I heard about the accident, Bella. I'm really glad you're okay," he said as he pulled away, nodding in assurance as he did so. I gave a light chuckle, pushing my hair behind my ears.

"Yeah, I was pretty lucky, I guess."

"Yeah, it's a shame about the Cullen girl though."

Out of an almost instinctual manner my eyes shot to Jacob's father, studying the expression he held. He wasn't focusing on me but was rather focusing on his son. His eyes were narrow, like a wary skepticism and I didn't like them so I looked away. "She's doing well. She's lucky." Jacob's father snorted and his son turned to glare at him. It seemed like a private moment so I pretended not to notice it. Charlie's voice then called us to the dining room. When all of us entered, Jacob behind me as he pushed his father over the divides in the floor, I noticed that Charlie had opened all of the Tupperware and placed it along the counter. Plates were at the beginning of the line resulting in a buffet. I smiled as the smell of the Cullen's spaghetti wafted warmly through the kitchen and stepped aside to allow the guests a meal first. Jacob smiled nervously after he grabbed a plate for his father and I returned it. Awkwardness seemed to follow me around but I couldn't really tell what was up with Jacob. Though he was nervous during our prior meeting it seemed to dissipate as the night wore on. This bout of nerves didn't seem to be going anywhere so I thought it best to ignore him until he could relax.

We all sat in the dining room, which was rarely used but Charlie and Billy could both see the game from their chairs so it didn't seem to bother them any. However, their placement to see the TV had also forced Jacob and me to sit together. It didn't seem too out of the ordinary and yet he was still giving me that strange look. Strange looks seemed to follow me and I was growing to hate them. So I slurped up my last bite of spaghetti and wiped my face before I turned to him. "Jacob, is there something wrong?" He looked at me quickly, as if my question caught him off guard, then sat up to wipe his mouth.

"No, no nothing's wrong. Why?"

"You're…looking at me strangely."

He smirked then, flashing me a look I'd seen in movies. "Am I? I'm sorry. I'll try to look at you not so strangely from now on." I rolled my eyes at him and he chuckled. While immature, his response seemed to relax him a bit and while he still held that strange look, he tried desperately to keep it away from me and for that I was grateful. Pretty soon we were just two friends having lunch together. Then it hit me.

"Hey, why are you out of school today?" I asked, glaring at him with a motherly expression. He chuckled and shrugged, eyeing me the same way.

"Why are you out of school today?"

"I'm traumatized."

"Really?"

"Yes. What's your excuse?"

"I'm traumatized too."

"Oh really? Why's that?"

"Well, a friend of mine, this brunette klutz of a girl almost got slammed between two cars yesterday. It was traumatizing." He pretended to wipe a tear away and I punched him in the shoulder. He chuckled again before shaking his head. "Nah, for some reason dad wanted to come and check up on you."

"Well, that's nice of him."

"Yeah, so long as that's his real reason." I narrowed my eyes at him and he glared ahead towards his father, who had his back turned to us as he faced the TV. "I mean, he's just been acting really weird since the Cullens came to down, even though none of them have done anything wrong that I know of. Do you know Sam Uley?"

"I don't think so."

Jacob growled a bit, rolling his eyes as he continued to speak. "He's sort of like a cult leader or something in my opinion. He's rounded up my friend Quil and now Quil won't talk to me really and he doesn't come to school as much. But anyway, Sam doesn't like them either. And my dad sides with him even though he seems crazy. It just pisses me off. They seem like good people, you know?"

I nodded and gave him a pat on the shoulder. "You're a good person, Jake." He rolled his eyes again and chuckled. We looked at each other for a few moments before I could feel other pairs of eyes on us. Turning around, Jacob and I saw our fathers staring us with a typical fatherly expression. I quickly took my hand off of Jacob's shoulder and he hunkered down in his chair, shoving another bite of food into his mouth. Charlie and Billy stared at us for a few minutes more before heading back to their game. Billy winked at his son before he did so. The both of us grimaced and Jacob nudged me before taking my plate into the kitchen. I followed him, not wanting to be left alone with our fathers. Jacob turned on the water and grabbed a sponge before I reached out and stopped him.

"Don't wash our dishes. Just leave them to soak. It's better that way anyway." Jacob shrugged and did as he was told. It was quiet for a few minutes and I glanced out into the front yard, noticing my truck. "Hey, wanna take a look at the damage to my Chevy?" Jacob's eyes seemed to light up at the thought of anything car related and he nodded as we headed out the front door and into the driveway. Jacob took the lead as soon as the truck was in view, dashing past me and heading over to the left side where the damage was. This was the first time that I'd really looked at it too. I leaned against the bed of the truck as I stared at that perfect indentation of Alice's hips. Even though she was fine it still bothered me to look at and I focused on the other assorted scratches that lined the dull paint. Alice and I were merely in a budding relationship, if that, but the image of her wedged between those two cars hurt me too much to bear. I wasn't being overly emotional, it just seemed best not to dwell on something like that.

Jacob was looking intently at the car and I could tell the indention had him rather confused. "So, the van sort of slammed into the side?" he asked, running his hand across where Alice's hip used to sit. I looked away, turning to see if I could look into the house. He was staring at me, waiting for me to answer and I chose to nod. He stared at me for a few minutes more before looking back at it. "It's just a little odd, this indent." He looked back and forth between my truck and me expecting another answer. I opened my mouth before I could find the words to say and must have looked like a moron. But he merely waited for my answer.

"I…I don't know. Alice was, you know…in there. It might have, I don't know." I stopped, running a hand through my hair as my throat went dry. It seemed all the more prevalent and disturbing now, reliving the accident that I thought would have cost me Alice Cullen's life. I took a deep breath, leaning against my steady Chevy. Jacob's brow furrowed and he came towards me, placing a large palm on my shoulder.

"Bella, are you okay?"

It seemed like a stupid question to ask and yet I found myself at a loss of words. All I could see was the crash, the swerving van, Rosalie screaming and Alice's face contorted in pain as she gripped the sides of the cars that were stressing her hips to a breaking point. Things were spinning but they weren't and my ears were throbbing and hot. I felt Jacob's arm around my waist and felt my hip pushing against his as he held me up, helping me to walk back to the house. They must have seen what was going on through the window because Charlie opened the door and came around my other side, lifting me to where I didn't have to walk at all. Billy was standing by the door and from the strange angle I was at it looked like he was standing. It was a strange sight and I had to look away. I heard Jacob mumbling something about my condition but I was more focused on trying to decide if my feet were touching the floor or not. By the time I'd figured out that they were touching the floor but dragging, I was already in my bed. Charlie had shut the door behind me and I could hear murmurs on the first floor of the house. Something like Charlie had expected this from me. Carlisle said it might have happened. I glared at my door as that information would have been handy to know.

I laid there for a bit, drifting in and out of sleep until I'd finally woken up from my stupor. Deciding to stay in bed rather than brave the stairs in my condition, I instead pondered what the hell just happened to me. Post traumatic stress disorder seemed plausible, but I hadn't really noticed any symptoms before today. Perhaps I was just overwhelmed. That seemed to fit better. Relaxing on my bed I pondered all of the events that had happened recently. My best friend got into a car accident. My best friend turned out to be fine because she was a vampire. I had my first kiss and it was with a girl. Yeah, that seemed like a lot to take in. Looking back, it was kind of sad that I hadn't really thought a lot of this over, except for Alice being a vampire. It was strange, yet relaxing. After calming myself down a bit I relived the car accident again. It was still difficult, but I didn't feel as wary as I had before. Perhaps that weird episode I had was a conscious nightmare, waking me up from what I was repressing. I should have been a psychologist. Smirking to myself I sat up and swung my feet over the side of the bed. I felt pretty okay. Then I stood up and walked around the room to my door. I still felt okay. Opening the door, I glanced down at the stairs and while I felt okay, I didn't want to brave them. I was awkward enough as it was without throwing dizziness and stairs into the picture.

I turned around to head back to bed when something to my left caught my eye. A tiny, familiar pixie was staring into my room with a rather perplexed look on her face. I laughed at the fact that this did not cause a panic within me at all and waved her in. She nodded, the windowsill rising silently in her firm grasp and stepped with catlike grace onto the carpet. "I'm sorry to bother you it's just, I didn't see you." She pointed to her head almost unconsciously and then shrugged. "I usually see you all the time but after you left I didn't get a single one. It worried me. I hope you're not creeped out."

"No, I'm not creeped out," I laughed, pulling her into a hug. "I don't know why you couldn't see me. I've been here the whole time. Everyone loved your spaghetti, by the way." Alice giggled, motioning towards the door.

"The Blacks are here, yes? Billy Black would have a fit if he knew I was here."

"You've heard what he thinks about you?"

Alice tapped her noggin again and I told her I forgot. She shrugged, still smiling and sat on my bed. "You looked a little pale when you first stood up. Are you okay?" The wreck ran through my mind again and I blinked it away. Then I nodded and sat next to her.

"Yeah, I just got a bit dizzy."

"You got dizzy again? Bella, are you sure you're alright? Maybe we should talk to Carlisle. He probably—

"Yeah, he talked to my dad. Apparently this is normal. It's a result of the…you know, accident." I waved my hand in the air as if those would magically make the words come out easier. Alice nodded, lowering my hand with hers and then keeping it there. Then she grinned broadly and turned to me, her eyes fluttering in excitement.

"So guess what, Bella? I talked to Carlisle and as it turns out this whole heat difference between us isn't as big of a deal as I thought. I mean, when you're red and sweaty it's best not to cuddle with you but other than that it's fine." She giggled as she held up our clasped hands and I returned it easily.

"I didn't realize the physical part of this meant so much to you," I said, blushing as I did so. Alice smiled and reached up to cup my cheek, moving her hand back to push the hair out of my face as she did so.

"It's a good part of a relationship. I mean, they all feed into the whole spectrum."

"Oh…well, I wouldn't know." I blushed again and looked away. Alice's eyes were on me and I didn't mind that so much. What I minded was the question she would ask that I knew I would answer honestly. She had that effect on me.

"Is this your first relationship ever?" she asked quietly, still staring at me. I nodded and then saw her smile out of the corner of my eyes. "That's great, really. Shame on the others that didn't pick you up beforehand but I can't be bothered to worry about them too much. So, that was your first kiss then?" she asked, biting on her bottom lip as she did though. My entire body was blushing and I pushed the sleeves up on my heated arms before I nodded again. It was almost embarrassing really. I'd never really considered me never having a significant other to be a bad thing but now that I had someone to talk about it with, I could definitely feel the pinch of loneliness that I always felt before Alice showed up.

"Bella, need I mention your cheeks again?"

"No,"

"Good." She giggled again and I scratched at my neck, finally gaining enough courage to look up at her. She had a strange look in her eye that I could decide if I wanted to trust or not. Then her eyes went up to the ceiling as she seemed to mull over something. "You know, I don't think that was a good first kiss. I mean, it was kind of short. And kind of chaste. I can do better. I want you to know that." She looked at me and while I thought she was joking, there was no hint of humor in her face. Despite that fact I still laughed and shook my head.

"Yeah, I'm sure, Alice. I didn't think it was bad. It was short but I liked it just the same." She nodded, reflecting on my words before she took her bottom lip in her teeth again.

"Do you mind if I…better my score, so to speak?"

"That sounds awfully piggish."

"Well, oink, oink and such."

I laughed as Alice leaned into me. I could see it in her eyes what she was about to do and she was so close to me, leaning further. For a brief moment I considered turning away, but I knew that would be stupid. And I didn't really want to anyway. Alice's eyes held mine until I felt her lips against mine. It sort of felt like kissing a movable marble statue, if those existed. Her lips were wonderfully smooth but hard and cold. They moved against mine and I felt her mouth open a little, which prompted me to do the same. Instinct took over as we each sought out a lip and pretty soon, at least to my knowledge, we had gotten the technique down. Alice was a pro, I was sure, and while I had no idea what I was doing she wasn't laughing into my mouth, which was probably a good sign. Her hand travelled up my arm and past my shoulder, resting on my neck as it pulled me closer. My hands ran across the tops of her thighs, coming to rest on her waist. It felt way too good and yet a part of me wanted to stop. It was spur of the moment but the minute that idea flashed into my head, I pulled away. Alice's eyes stayed shut for just a second more before she opened them. I tried to think of something to say to cover for what I'd done but she laughed before I could do so, blocking my brain function once again.

"Sorry, that was a bit much. We'll take it slower. That's what you want, I think. But, I think I bettered my score." She flashed me a flirtatious look and I laughed, nudging her a bit.

"Yeah, I guess I'd have to agree."

She nodded, then shrugged innocently, looking my way as she did so. "However, I think you're the high score, Bella."

"Me?"

"You're very good. At least, in my opinion you are. And that's all that matters, isn't it?"

"Of course."

She grinned and then grabbed me, pulling me towards her as she laid down on the bed. My head rested on her chest and I could feel her lungs rising and falling with each breath. It was so normal, yet I couldn't get over the missing heartbeat. Alice ran her hand over my hair, almost petting me, and played with it's long length. I wondered if she could grow her hair out. I wondered where she came from, who she was. I wondered about her entire family. Alice sighed contentedly and I decided there wasn't a better time to ask.

"Alice, may I ask you something?"

"Ask away, Bella, dear."


	15. Chapter 15

Cool

"What were you…like, who were you before you were a vampire?" Alice was quiet for a minute and I wondered if I'd crossed some sort of line. Then Alice resumed petting my hair and sighed.

"I apologize, I had a vision," she said softly, though there was something off with her voice. "Most vampires do have memories of their past lives. Every member of my family does, except for me." I raised my head up, propping it up on my arm so that I could look her in the eyes. She nodded at my questioning expression and flitted her hand as if it was nothing. "I've done some research. It's not all that happy really."

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"No, I do." She smiled and caressed my cheek before continuing. "Apparently, I'm from Mississippi around the beginning of the 1900's. And I'm just theorizing here but I'm assuming I had premonitions as human as well, because I was committed to an asylum, which I can imagine wasn't all that pleasant. Somehow I was turned into a vampire and when I woke up that's who I was. Almost instantly, I had a vision of Carlisle and what he was doing and I wanted to follow in those footsteps too, so I found him."

"What about your parents?"

Alice shrugged, moving her lips around like she was nervous. "I don't know. The commitment date to the asylum is the same date as my death on my tombstone." She looked down, toying with her hands and shrugging again. "I guess it wasn't really all that grand to have a crazy daughter."

"You're not crazy, Alice," I said quickly, sitting up and resting next to her. She smiled at me and it seemed like she believed me. It made me feel better.

"Anyway, I also found out I have a sister. Had…a sister. She has a daughter, my niece who still lives in Mississippi." Alice smiled sadly and I returned it. It would definitely take a toll on you to not be able to see the last living member of your family. Alice looked down again and I could tell that this conversation had saddened her greatly. Sad Alice meant Sad Bella and I wasn't really down for being sad right now.

"Will you say, 'Mississippi' again?"

"Mississippi,"

"You totally have an accent."

"I do not!" Alice's retort came out with a massive southern twang and I couldn't help but laugh as she threw her hands to her mouth. "I can't believe you bring out the hick in me," she laughed as I tried to regain my composure.

"It's not hick, Alice, it's cute! Say something else."

"No," she answered with a smile, running her hand through her short hair. I rolled my eyes at her and she tossed a pillow at me. Despite my lack of coordination I managed to catch it and she growled as I placed it smugly behind my head. "Anyway, that's the story."

"What about the others? Can I ask about them?"

Alice then proceeded to tell me the long and descriptive stories of her family. She told them wonderful and at times I imagined I looked like a little girl, sitting with my knees pulled to my chest, listening with wide eyed wonder as she carried on. It was as if she was living vicariously through everyone else's pasts and if that worked for her then who was I to judge? She told me about Edward in Chicago and the Spanish influenza. She positively gushed about Carlisle, at how he had never bitten a human for a meal. Then she swooned over how he and Esme met and continued to swoon about Emmett and how he was found by Rosalie. Suicides and being mauled by a bear didn't really strike me as romantic but I let it slide. She was so adorable when she swooned. When she finished she sighed and collapsed next to me. "I will now open the floor to questions," she grinned. I raised my hand and she pretended to search for a bit before finally pointing at me. "Yes, the lovely brunette in front."

"Please, call me Bella. What about Rosalie's past?"

"Rosalie's very private. She'll tell you her past in due time, or not at all. Next question."

"So Carlisle's the only one that hasn't killed a human for food?"

"No, I haven't and Rosalie hasn't either. We're awesome like that."

"Clearly." I smiled and raised my hand again. She laughed and called on me. "So, of anything pertaining to Dracula, Elizabeth Bathory, horror movies and all that, what of it is true?"

Alice furrowed her brow, digging within the deep confines of her mind to pull up all of the information she needed. "Let's see…garlic makes us sick, as does any food other than blood but it's not really a deterrent. The only, only way a vampire can die is by getting our heads ripped off and limbs for good measure and burning us. Remember that Bella, should I someday become rabid." I expected her to be joking however her expression told me otherwise and I nodded, although the idea made me sick. "Um…I told you about the sun thing. Crosses don't work because, in my speculative opinion, we are not damned. Carlisle or Edward might think otherwise but they're both total Jesus freaks so I don't even know."

"Works for me."

Alice laughed again, shaking her head at me. "You're so strange. I'd like to think that if I were in your position I'd be grilling me."

"Well, no need to rush things. There's time, right?"

"Plenty of time," Alice sighed, leaning in and kissing me again. I was really enjoying this kissing thing. And this was like, three in one day, which seemed pretty good to me. Alice went at just the right pace for me and I liked that. Then again, Alice seemed to have no flaws, save for that whole bloodsucking thing. I pulled away with a soft hum and Alice giggled. "You seem to enjoy those."

"Yes, I think I can say with confidence that I like kissing."

"Congratulations,"

"Thank you."

"I don't recall ever having such nonsensical conversations," Alice said after a few moments. We had switched around now to where I was sitting up and Alice was lying along my lap, her feet dangling a few inches above the floor. "I mean, that's not to say that my family and I don't have fun it's just…I don't know. You're so new to me in every way." She smiled, looking up into my eyes.

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"As you should." Alice sighed loudly and around the same time I inhaled. Now, generally speaking, breathing someone else's breath is really weird, even if it's not smelly. But Alice's breath didn't even smell like breath, you know? And technically, I guess it wasn't. Her lungs weren't functioning, so they weren't turning that air into carbon dioxide. They were just exhaling the same air with Alice's scent on it. It was the strangest feeling ever. I would have no problem living with my nose in Alice's mouth for the rest of my life, and I think there's something very wrong with that. Alice looked quizzically up at me. "Is something wrong?"

Her voice woke me from my daze and I shook my head down at her. Doing so caused my hair to fall from behind my ears and into her face. She laughed as I assume my hair tickled her marble skin, and began patting it like a kitten. I really wanted to hug her, but thought it best to answer her question instead. "I was just wondering how I smelled to you? Like, literally. What do I smell like?"

Alice sat up slowly, careful not to hit me as she did so, and sat on my lap. Now, the girl couldn't have even weighed triple digits so this was no problem. I just couldn't help but smile at how comical we were. Alice shimmied around on top of my knees and broke them apart. I lifted them to where my knees came up around her. She nodded and wrapped her legs around my back. Surprisingly comfortable, I was learning new things every day. Alice reached behind her, pushing my knees together again. She then used them as a backrest as she leaned against them, facing me.

"It's hard to explain to you, since you're human. I mean, you've got a plethora of assorted foods thrown at you daily. As far as I know you've ever experienced starvation or severe dehydration." She paused for a minute, thinking, before she sat up and leaned into my neck. I felt her nose against my skin and I felt the sensation on my skin of her breathing in. Goosebumps arose along my neck and as she smiled I could feel her lips against my neck, just like my dream. If it was supposed to be foreboding, it wasn't and I watched as Alice pulled away with her eyes clasped shut. She stayed like that for a few moments before opening them again with an excited expression.

"Okay, so you're from the desert, right? So imagine, if you will, walking the desert for two days in July with no water. Imagine that you've never had real water either. You've just had, I don't know, cactus juice or something. And then suddenly there's an oasis and you just dive headfirst into it. And the water is cool around you but you don't drink yet. You come out of the water and breathe for the first time. It's like that, but of course the smell of water is intensified by two hundred or so."

I thought about this for a moment, remembering the deadly sun and how dehydration was common but I still couldn't grasp it. However, for Alice's sake, I pretended like I did, widening my eyes and exhaling. "That's hardcore, chick. How do you resist?"

"It's just something you have to do. It gets easier every day that I'm with you though. That doesn't mean that sometimes…" she drifted and I nodded as she rested back against my legs again.

"I trust you, Alice."

"Good to know. Are you going back to school tomorrow?"

"What is tomorrow?"

"Wednesday,"

I groaned, making a face that in turn made Alice giggle. I was kind of thinking of lying on this bed with Alice for the next eighty years of my life but clearly that was out of the cards. I had been neglecting my other friends lately. Granted, I kind of had an excuse but still, it really wasn't all that cool of me to do. At least I'd gone to Port Angeles with Angela and Jessica. That probably toned down any rage they might have against me. Yeah, right. "I wish you were going to be there," I mumbled, still kind of pouting. Alice rolled her eyes and shook her head sadly.

"There is nowhere I'd rather be than wherever you are. But my hips are broken. I can go nowhere for a few good weeks. However, you have not repeated your junior multiple times and have much to learn."

"So…you want me to go."

"If there's nothing holding you back besides me, yes. If you're still dizzy or anything, please stay home." She smiled at me and I returned it, but just a bit as I was still pouting. Alice, in turn, pouted back, her bottom lip quivering in a way that made me melt. It was so unfair. In spite of myself I 'aww-ed' and leaned forward to embrace her. She laughed as she hugged me back. "Don't try to have a pouting war with me. I will win. I always do."

"That so wasn't fair."

"All's fair in love and war. And pouting matches are war."

"Fine then, it's time for negotiations," I said, pulling away. Alice gave me a strange look and quirked her brow, listening. I licked my lips, rubbing my hands together maliciously and smirking as her expression looked a little bit nervous.

"I will go to school tomorrow if…you stay the night tonight." Alice breathed a sort of sigh of relief and shook her head.

"You don't seem to sleep well when I stay over."

"Oh, but that was one time! And it was your fault for getting up. I swear I'll sleep." I pouted again, though it was more pleading this time, and leaned closer to Alice. She took a deep breath and threw her hands in the air in defeat.

"Fine, fine…whatever. It's not like I hate it or anything," she said, smirking at me. "I do need to tend to something before I stay, okay?" I considered nodding for a moment, but a more prominent reaction was gnawing at the back of my mind. Well, since we were being honest….

"Are you…going hunting?" Alice looked over at me, like she couldn't believe I'd just asked that question. But it wasn't in a mean way; it was like she was sad about having to answer it, which saddened me.

"Yes, I am."

"What's on the menu tonight?" I asked, hoping she would catch the humor. Thankfully she did and she giggled a bit before shrugging and bounding to the window in one leap where she straddled the windowsill again. Once there she closed her eyes and rocked back and forth as the vision came to her.

"It looks like it will be deer. I'll be back soon." Before I good tell her goodbye she was gone, having plummeted out of the window again. I leaned my head against the bed and closed my eyes, imagining Alice in those cute pants she was wearing, racing with more grace than the deer. She would catch up to it and catch it easily, grabbing it and pinning it to the floor. Before the deer could even recognize it had stopped falling, she would crack its neck, putting it out of any suffering, and continue her meal as civilly as possible. That thought should have horrified me but in my overly dramatic mind it was beautiful, poetic even. I considered for a moment telling Alice this when she got back but judging by her reactions to hunting, it probably wasn't the best of ideas.

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock and as I looked over I saw Charlie standing in the doorway, a plate of spaghetti and milk in his hands. "Hey, Bella, you're awake," he said cheerfully, coming inside the room and placing my dinner on my bedside table. I nodded, turning to face him. He was giving me dinner? How long had Alice been here with me? For the first time in awhile I glanced at my clock, noting that it was almost staring. I guess our comfortable silence moments had gone on longer than moments.

"Yeah. I'm sorry about that scare. I don't know what came over me." He shrugged my comment off, sitting on the bed next to me and petting my knee.

"I called Dr. Cullen and he said it was perfectly normal. I mean, he told me that in the beginning but I called him again to make sure. He said you were suffering a sort of delayed repercussion from the accident. He says it should go away after a day or so but if it doesn't to give him a call. So will you let me know if you get dizzy again?" He gave me a look that said he doubted what my answer was going to be even though I hadn't given it yet.

"Sure, no problem, but I'm feeling good now. I was thinking I would go to school tomorrow."

"You're a quick healer, just like your father," Charlie said with a chuckle. I rolled my eyes at him and he shrugged again, standing from the bed. "Well, Jacob was worried sick about you. It might be good to call him tomorrow and let him know you're okay." Once he was standing he looked around, his face turning into a sort of grimace as he looked towards my window. I panicked and followed his glance, knowing that Alice was just sitting on that windowsill. However, there was nothing there and I watched curiously as Charlie headed over to the window.

"Are you leaving this opened?"

"Yeah…it gets hot sometimes and I open it for air."

"Hmm," Charlie answered, investigating the window latch. "I'll get you a fan or something. I don't like this being open at night. You never know who might get in."

"Right, dad, someone's gonna climb the tree and leap the three feet to my windowsill," I said, laughing at the fact that my father had no clue. It was adorable." Charlie harrumphed then latched the window before heading to the door.

"Just promise me you'll keep it closed, Bells. Don't want any creatures of the night getting in." Oh, the irony. No seriously, oh the irony.

"Okay. Night, dad."

"Goodnight, Bella," he answered with a wink before closing the door. I sighed as the door shut after him and unlocked the window before I sat down again and shimmied over to my bedside table. It had been a few good hours since I last ate and I was famished. It would seem that with Alice things were a muted blur. I hoped that would blow over soon. It wasn't cool to be so enraptured with someone. Alice still hadn't returned by the time I finished my meal so I took this opportunity to take my dishes to the sink and enjoy a hot shower. The water felt nice and I made sure to scrub hard to make my scent less appealing. Yeah I'd already done that this morning but surely I'd…done stuff since then to increase the smell. I didn't know. The point was: I took a shower. By the time I was finished I was certain that Alice would be back on my bed, waiting for me. It was nice…having someone waiting for me.

And she was, just as I'd thought, her golden eyes vibrant in my dim room. "Another shower?" she asked, raising a brow at me. I shrugged, running the towel through my hair again and she smiled. She had changed and was wearing a tank top and thin sweat pants. Well, if she was going for comfort I was too.

"Would you mind, um, turning around?" I asked, blushing as I reached into my drawer for some of my warmer sweat pants. Alice said nothing but did as I asked, rolling over on the bed to where her back was facing me. Okay, so I'm not a pervert and I didn't think that I was into that kind of stuff, but Alice had the cutest butt I'd ever seen…or noticed. I blushed again and quickly changed into my sweatpants and a long sleeved shirt. As soon as I'd pulled the shirt over my head Alice rolled back over and watched me lazily from her position on the bed. She moved over as I made my way over and laid the covers over for me. I thanked her and crawled in, turning to face her.

"So, Charlie told me to lock my window, lest I want creatures of the night getting in," I told her, smirking as I did so. Alice feigned surprise then smiled, snuggling closer to me.

"Smart man, I'd say."

"But where's the fun in a closed window?"

"Now that logic, I could argue with, but I won't," Alice said, laughing quietly as she did so. "I'll be honest though, I do lock it when I come in. And I'd like it very much if you locked it when I left. I'd like to be the only creature that visits you through the window."

"Sure, I'll do that. I want you to be the only person that visits me through that window, too." Alice flashed me a thankful smile and reached out to caress my cheek.

"You're sweet."

"I try. Will you be here when I wake up?"

"Of course, unless Charlie comes in. But other than that I'll be here to make sure you get to school."

I snarled a little bit and Alice giggled before tucking me in a bit more. "Now, please get some sleep? Pretty please with sugar on top?" I groaned playfully but nodded, turning around and relaxing into her. As expected, Alice's arm came over me, this time threading our fingers together. I sighed contentedly and as I expected, was asleep in no time flat.

When I woke up in the morning it was to something pretty damn freezing on my cheek. I recognized it within an instant and smiled, opening my eyes to find Alice staring down at me. "Good morning, Bella," she whispered, kissing me on the lips this time. I only smiled, fearful of morning breath and she stood, pulling the covers off of me. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes. I don't think I even moved, did I?"

"No, not much." She sighed, lifting me out of bed and throwing a pair of clothes into my arms. "I hope you don't mind, I raided your closet. I think this outfit is cute, but of course wear what you want. I nodded, still sort of asleep and stared at the clothing. Alice closed her eyes and opened them sadly. "Charlie's coming to wake you. This is where I leave you." I leaned forward and she knew exactly what to do, wrapping her arms around me. When she tried to pull away I resisted and she scoffed playfully.

"Bella, it's eight hours, hardly tortuous."

"Says you,"

"Yes, says me."

"Fine," I grumbled, letting her go. She caressed my cheek again, her finger dipping under my chin and over my lips before she raced to the window. By the time my human self could turn around, she was already in the tree. She winked at me and motioned for me to lock the window before she leapt down and was gone. I heard Charlie's footsteps nearing my door and I smiled, rubbing my eyes. "I'm awake, dad," I called, not wanting to bother him and not really wanting small talk this early. He mumbled something cheery and I heard him creep down the stairs. Wanting to get this day over with as soon as possible, I got dressed as fast as I could. Yeah, I wanted to see Alice and wanting to so fervently didn't make me a creeper. I had thought about this thoroughly last night. Alice was merely my first relationship and this was normal. Also, what was normalcy in vampire terms? I was pretty darn sure that after a few days or so I would be over this obsessive gig. As I'd said, it just wasn't cool.

The drive to school was fairly quick and I ignored it, focusing on my own thoughts rather than the road. However by the time I pulled into a parking lot at school I could no longer ignore what was going on. Everyone, literally everyone was staring at me. I checked my face in the mirror and it looked fine. Maybe they were still a bit shocked about the accident. Today was going to suck, that was for sure. Before I got out of my car, something caught my eye and I looked over to see the silver Volvo pulling up. My heart jumped as I watched the Cullens get out of the car, then fell as Alice was not with them. I scoffed, I knew she wouldn't be. I was acting like an asshole. I needed to get out of the car.

As soon as I opened the door, I was bombarded with balloons.

"Bella!" Angela shouted, embracing me out of nowhere. "We're all so thrilled that you're okay!" she said, stepping back so that Mike could come in out of nowhere and hug me. Eric was next and Jessica chose not to hug me but instead hold the big balloon bouquet that was apparently for me. I think we were both okay with not hugging. A few more students gathered around with cards and candies and such and I had to open my truck and place it all inside before I could make it to class. Questions were coming from everywhere and I answered them as best as I could. I was in a whirlwind of people I didn't know, reliving the accident over and over with each question. By the time I'd finally gotten to first period, I was sure I looked like hell. And this continued throughout the day.

"How did you feel? Is Alice alive? Did you push her into the crash? Were you guys having a suicide pact? Why hasn't Tyler come back? Did you know it was his van? Are you having his baby or something?"

I swear, those were the exact questions. And there were so many that after awhile everything just became a blur of yeses and no's Never in my life had I been more thankful for calculus and Angela. She shooed people away for me and acted normally all through class, finally allowing me to catch my breath. "Don't worry about these guys," she said at the end of the period. "It's a small town, news comes and goes quickly. Are you hungry?" I nodded, then shook my head. I was starting to lose my grasp on how to answer a question. The halls were getting crowded again and I could see people coming at me with their stupid questions.

"I, um, actually, I think I'm gonna go home for lunch today," I told Angela, unsure if that was a lie or not. "I made a lunch today and forgot it. I don't want it to spoil." Angela nodded understandingly and pushed me out a side door. I nearly stumbled on my way out and as I looked back I could see Angela with her arms spread in front of the doors, blocking everyone from getting out to me. Angela was so cool. And while there was no one following me, I still didn't feel like I could breathe. My truck was practically screaming to me from the parking lot and I raced to it, finally feeling relief when it started. I drove it slowly out of the parking lot and down a few residential streets before I found a large median off of the main road. It was on a long stretch with nothing but trees surrounding it. This was what I needed. I turned the engine off and rolled the windows down, feeling the cool mist come in and rest on my cheeks. "That was fucking murder," I murmured to my dashboard.

"I'll say so," came a voice to my left. I totally screamed like a six year old and flew to the other side of the cab. Alice watched me do so with a 'my bad' expression on her face. I breathed a sigh of relief upon recognizing her and waved her in. She climbed into the driver's side and I fell into her.

"Today sucked," I mumbled, comfortable for the first time since I woke up.

"I know. I saw it. I'm sorry. They were being sweet with the cards and stuff."

"Yeah, they were. You got a few. They're in the floorboard." I pointed to the floor and Alice smiled.

"That's sweet of them."

I nodded, looking up at her. "Hey, how'd you get here? What are you doing here?"

Alice laughed, tracing her fingers along my dashboard. "Those are wonderful, if not delayed questions. I kept getting visions of you of school and I felt sort of terrible, as it's my fault, kind of. So I thought I might come and offer my apologies. I also thought that I'd make you feel better somehow."

"Just you being here makes me feel better," I whispered, leaning up to kiss her. She smiled against my lips for a moment before kissing me back. Her lips parted and I found myself craving more of them. Out of some strange instinct I didn't know I possessed, I dared my tongue across her bottom lip before I quickly pulled it back in, blushing violently. Alice stopped kissing me then, but began talking with our lips brushing against each other.

"No, it's fine. Do it again," she half-growled into my mouth before kissing me again. Doing as I was told, I slid my tongue back out and was pleasantly met with hers. Oh…so this was how it worked. I could get used to this too. Alice's hands were wrapped around my neck as I dug my own into her hair, pushing her back against the car door and laying on top of her. She giggled as she made contact with the door and pulled away for a moment longer than I wanted. "Is this make-out lane or something?" she asked.

"Maybe," I answered, shrugging as innocently as I could muster whilst on top of her.

Alice nodded, then made an approving face. "I guess I could get used to this during lunchtime."

"Cool," I answered hastily before capturing her lips again.


	16. Chapter 16

See Shep Shred Part I

So, it had been two months since the spaghetti dinner at Alice's house. Semester tests were coming up, as was Christmas and Alice would be coming back to school soon. A few days after Alice had surprised me in my truck, I brought Charlie over to the Cullen's to formally introduce Alice as my friend. Surprisingly, my shy father was more than friendly with the Cullens, and they in return were wonderful to him. Even Rosalie smiled at him. I was pretty sure she had yet to smile at me so I couldn't help but feel a twinge of pride at my father as she did so. The Cullens were also pretty accepting of me. It was normal for them to find me at the house and I liked to think they liked me. Rosalie was the odd exception but she mainly stayed out of my way and that suited us both just fine. I couldn't complain much. Also, I was pretty sure I was falling in love with Alice. So things were going fairly well for me.

Especially right at this moment, because Alice and I were in my truck again. We had pulled over on that same stretch of road and had proceeded with our proceedings. It was the same almost every day at lunch when I didn't have a request from Angela or something. The story Alice had suggested I use was that I went to visit her every day, which technically wasn't a lie at all. I guess when you're out and about among humans for a hundred or so years you get fairly good at lying. Anyway, we were in my truck thoroughly enjoying things with both windows down so that Alice could stay cool. I couldn't complain in my thick jacket. On this particular day, snow was filtering in, making the whole scene oddly romantic to me. Okay and I should probably explain this too. Alice and I never did anything besides make out. I mean, we both had morals and such, me more so than her but she never complained. And yeah, maybe there was some fondling involved but it was over the shirt. I just felt the need to clarify that. We weren't innocent, but we weren't those lesbian sluts you could watch videos of on YouTube.

Alice was on top this time and she commented on my heated skin as she trailed kisses down my neck. I couldn't really respond at the moment so I responded by pulling her closer by means of her ass. She giggled as she rolled us both on our sides, pushing into me with her pelvis as she did so. I returned the motions, trying not to laugh with delight at how awesome this whole thing was. When Alice pushed a bit too hard, my back was sent into the gear shift and I groaned, breaking us apart. Alice sat up, helping me up as well. "Are you okay?" she asked, reaching around with lithe similar to a cat to lift my shirt and examine my back.

"I'm totally fine. Pissed that you stopped but other than that," I joked, feeling her cool lips on the skin of my back as she kissed it better. After that she lowered my shirt and sat up to face me, rolling her eyes.

"Forgive me please for caring about your well being."

"You're forgiven, but only because I'm such a great person."

"Clearly,"

"Clearly," I giggled as Alice shook her head and straightened my jacket.

"We've got about ten minutes left. I guess it's okay that we stopped when we did. I was getting a bit too hot anyway."

"Sorry," I said, blushing. Alice shook her head again, ruffling my hair.

"Don't be sorry. It's not our fault," she returned, leaning in to kiss me again. "Your lips are just kind of addictive or something less cliché."

"I like addictive. It suits you fairly well, I'd say."

"Well, thank you darlin'," Alice added with her southern drawl. I'd coaxed her to where she would bring it out at times. It was just as adorable as it was hot, if that made any sense.

"Have you ever thought of going to Mississippi?"

"No. It's generally too hot."

"Oh, I'm sorry,"

"Don't be. You're sorry too much as it is." Alice flicked my nose and put her jacket on, opening the door to step out. I sighed and scooted over to the driver's side when she hopped out. Snowflakes were landing in her spiked hair and I brushed them away softly. She mouthed a thank you to me then leaned up on her toes to give me one final kiss. When she pulled away she rested on the door for a minute. "So, today is Friday. Tomorrow, my family and I are heading to this clearing in the woods to enjoy the snow. Because it's going to snow a lot tonight." She tapped her head and continued on. "And I was wondering if you'd like to come? It's just gonna be the usual snowball fights, snow angels and snowmen. It's sort of a tradition we have. I'd like to share it with you."

"Yeah, that'd be great! I'm sure Charlie will say yes."

"I'm sure he will too," Alice added confidently before stepping away from the truck. "I'll pick you up at around ten tomorrow morning. Go on, get to school," she waved, grinning ear to ear. I nodded and started the truck. Alice waved to me before sprinting off into the woods and I sighed happily as I made my way back to school. The school day after lunch was always sort of a blur. I mean, I did my work and such but my thoughts were always elsewhere. For instance, today they were on playing in the snow. And they were still on playing in the snow when I arrived home and only stopped when I realized that my father was home earlier than usual. Thinking it was something serious I parked quickly and raced in the door to find my father sitting on the couch, his head buried in his hands. Oh god, someone had died. I knew it. Charlie looked up as I entered and I noticed no tears, which was a good sign. He turned a bright red and harrumphed, motioning me to the couch. I went tentatively, watching him as I sat. He gave me a strange look that I couldn't quite identify and sat next to me.

"Dad, is everything okay?" I asked, placing a hand over his. He jumped at my touch but nodded quickly, as if he was embarrassed.

"Yeah, yeah everything's fine, Bells. I'm just trying to think about how to say what I want to say here." He paused, his moustache twitching as he moved his lip around. I smiled at him and he threw his hands in the air. "Well, I guess I'll just come right out and say it. Victor Harrison, a buddy of mine, said he was driving down the road and he saw your truck pulled off to the side. So he slowed to see if you were okay. And then your head popped up. And then another head popped up. He said it was some spiky-headed emo punk."

"Spiky-headed emo punk?"I repeated, trying desperately to maintain control. Charlie nodded and stood pacing.

"Mhmm, spiky-headed emo punk. SHEP, if you want to shorten it. And I've been thinking of every guy I know that's around your age and I can't spot him. And Billy Black's been telling me that he's worried about you and you mentioned Jacob not returning your calls and dammit I don't know what to think. Bella, what are you doing with Shep? Don't tell me his real name either; I might put a warrant out on him. I blushed at the thought of having this talk with my father. My mother had already given me the talk years ago and of course there were those silly Sex Ed classes in middle school. But really, I never imagined having this talk with him, no matter how hilariously it was going.

"Alright, dad, Shep and I have been seeing each other for a few months now. We're getting fairly serious, I'd say."

"Does he treat you well?"

"Very well…the best."

"And…and what goes on in the truck…"

"Shep's never even rounded second."

Charlie made a face, turning away from me. Okay, so I was being totally unfair to him, but it was funny. I couldn't help it. He sighed, regaining his composure and turned to me, grabbing a plastic sack from the armchair. "I called your mother, told her what I knew. She told me to get you these and that she'd call you later tonight. And…she says I should meet him." I took the bag and peered as casually as I could into them. Condoms. Jesus. I chuckled into the bag to relieve the strain on my stomach and then stood, hiding the bag behind my back.

"Thanks, dad. How about I bring Shep over tomorrow? I was planning on hanging out with Shep tomorrow anyway. Does that sound fine?"

"Yeah…yeah sure."

"And, dad, do you even know what 'emo' means?"

He looked over at me as if the question had never been posed to him before. Then he paused, rubbing his moustache as he mouthed the word over and over again. "It means…emotional," he said weakly. Rather than responding I merely giggled and raced up the stairs. Poor Charlie, he wasn't very equipped to handle all of this. When I made it to my room I threw the condoms on my bed and went over to unlatch the window. Alice wasn't scheduled to come because she wanted me to get a good night's sleep for tomorrow. But I always left it unlatched until I went to bed just to be sure. When I headed back to my bed, a familiar vibration pattern filled my pocket and I dug it out, looking at the number. I stared at it for one more ring, unable to answer. Unless I was vastly mistaken, the number was Jacob's. He hadn't called me for weeks and we used to hang out regularly. In fact, we'd gotten really close. Close enough that I felt that I could tell him about Alice. He'd gotten really pissed. And since then he hadn't called. Taking a deep breath I pressed the answer button and put the phone to my ear.

"Jacob?"

"I heard you're going to the field with Alice tomorrow."

"How'd you hear about that?"

"Don't go."

"What? Why?"

"Because it's not safe, Bella. I don't trust you with her and her family."

"You've never even met Alice, Jake. Don't you think it's a bit presumptuous to be so rude before you've even met the girl?"

"Don't doubt me, Bella! I know you're not safe with them!"

"Don't ever yell at me like that. Goodbye," I said, snapping the phone shut. If that didn't ruin my bright and easily amused mood. My phone vibrated again and I ignored it, knowing that it was Jacob. When it called a third time I glanced at the number and recognized my mother. Even though I wasn't up for chatting with her, I answered the phone.

"Hey, mom,"

"Hello, Bella. Now spill it. Your father tells me there's someone new in your life."

"You could say that."

"Oh, honey, I'm so happy for you! Tell me, what's he like?" Okay, I loved my mom. I was open with my mom. But I definitely wasn't prepared to tell her that he was a she. It didn't seem right to do so over the phone. So I played along.

"Dark spiky hair, a bit on the short side, skinny, wonderful." My mother sighed dreamily into the phone.

"Sounds like you really like him. It reminds me of when I met Phil. Of course, Phil is very muscular, you know. Did your father give you the condoms?"

"Yeah…thanks for that. I think he's stuck in that embarrassed blush now."

"Well, I just want you to be safe. So tell me what's new. I haven't spoken to you in three days!"

I carried on with my mother, speaking to her on speaker phone as I worked on homework. I told her about working on my truck and the snow that was expected tomorrow. She told me about Phil and how they're worried his sore shoulder might be something worse. It was a nice casual chat. I liked it. By the time I finally hung up with her, my homework was almost finished and it was time to start dinner. Charlie was distracted by a football game and pretty soon the awkwardness from before was gone. The game was still on when we finished dinner so I excused myself quietly and headed upstairs. If I timed it right, by the time I finished it would be time to go to bed. The subjects I was lacking in were the same subjects that followed lunch and subsequently were the classes I wasn't doing so well in. I focused hard on economics and drew an outline for my art project. By that time it was about ten o'clock and I was more than tired. Yawning, I headed over to the window, prepared to lock it when I suddenly drew back.

The window was already latched. I turned around quickly, expecting something, anything to be behind me. But there wasn't. I knew for a fact I had unlatched before I went downstairs. My spine began to tingle, something I thought only happened in horror movies and I felt the tendons in my palm tightening. Taking a deep breath, I crouched down to the floor, looking under my bed. There was nothing there either. And my closet door was open. Feeling much calmer, but not entirely so, I headed over to the closet door and shut it with a satisfying click of the lock. Then I unlocked and latched the window again, for my own peace of mind. I wasn't sure exactly how well I'd sleep tonight, but it wasn't looking too good.

At nine o'clock my alarm went off and I groaned as I reached over and hit the snooze. I hadn't managed to actually fall asleep until about four in the morning and five hours of sleep, while not terrible, still didn't feel like enough. However, the idea of seeing Alice and having family fun snow time was definitely enough initiative to get out of bed. I sat up slowly, rubbing the sleep for my eyes and turned the snooze off. I didn't need it anyway, clearly. I took a quick shower and dressed in my warmest clothes. With vampires, who knows what I might be enduring. It was best to play it safe, I thought. I looked to the floor as I finished zipping up my jacket and noticed the box of condoms. Alice would be here any minute. She'd be meeting my father…as my girlfriend. Maybe a little humor would be good for the both of us. I grabbed the box, stuffing a condom in my pocket just as I heard a car pull up outside. Wanting to beat my father to the door, I raced down the stairs, tripping twice and rounded the hall into the front walkway. As I did I could see Charlie getting up from his chair in the kitchen, heading over. He paused as he saw me and waited in the living room, where the front door was out of sight.

I smiled to myself, opening the door as Alice was lifting her hand to knock. She smiled at me and I returned it, pulling out the condom and stuffing it into her hand. "Dad says you need to use this," I said, taking her hand. Alice held it up, furrowing her brow.

"Um…" was all she could say before I dragged her into the hallway.

"Dad," I said, partly out of breath as I neared him with Alice on my arm. "This…is Shep." Alice was still very obviously holding the condom in her hand and she looked at me in confusion before looking to my father, registering his expression, and stuffing the rubber deeply within her pocket. Charlie's look? Priceless. It was confused, embarrassed and overwhelmed at the same time. He looked back and forth between me and Alice a few times before he awkwardly extended his hand.

"Alice…pleasure to see you again," he said awkwardly, paying special attention to Alice's spiked hair. Alice shook it, giving him an equally confused expression.

"And you, Charlie. I think I'm missing something. Shep?" She looked to me and I shrugged innocently.

"It's short for spiky-headed emo punk. One of dad's friends said he saw me in the car with one spiky-headed emo punk. And Charlie wanted to meet him. In this case her…which is you." I smiled at her and she returned it hesitantly before looking to Charlie. Charlie was clicking his tongue on the roof of his mouth, still unsure of what to do.

"I…uh, Bella? Does your mother know?"

"I'm not telling her."

"I'm not either."

"Then for now, she doesn't know. Look, dad, I'm trying to be casual about this. It should be the same as if you were meeting my boyfriend."

"Bells, I'm just…trying to process here. It's a lot to spring on someone," he replied a little bit angrily. I could see Alice nodding in my peripheral and felt myself panicking.

"Do you…uh, need to think about this? Alone?"

"Yeah, yeah I do. You kids are going to hang out today, right? Call me if you're going to be late, Bella. And Alice, take care of her."

"Yes, sir," Alice answered, taking the initiative to pull me out the door. I watched Charlie as I was dragged out of the room. He ran a hand over his face and sat down on the couch, looking as if he'd seen a ghost. The screen door slammed behind me and I felt my feet crunch on freshly fallen snow. Looking around I realized that at least two feet had fallen over night. Alice was right, but who doubted her, really? Alice had chosen Emmett's burgundy Jeep for this trip, most likely because it did well in snow and she pulled the door open for me wordlessly before climbing in the driver's side. I watched her do so, a foreboding feeling in my stomach, and climbed in, buckling my seat belt.

When Alice was inside and buckled, she looked over at me, very obviously displeased. "What the hell was that, Bella?" she asked in disbelief. I shrugged, feeling a burn rush to my cheeks.

"I thought it'd be funny."

"You thought it'd be funny to spring something like that on your father? Your father whom as far as I know has been nothing but wonderful to you? Is this some kind of rebellion thing? Because it's generally a faux pas to bring an outsider in on family relations." She glared at me and I looked down. Charlie had been sweet to me. And I was grateful. But I wasn't doing a very good job of showing it. Alice shook her head, turning on the Jeep and pulling it out of the driveway with ease. We drove for a few minutes in silence and I watched the trees rush by, a mix of evergreen and snow flurries. When I couldn't take the silence anymore, I finally willed up the courage to apologize.

"I'm sorry, Alice," I whispered, knowing that she would hear. She glanced over at me but said nothing and I took a deep breath. "I just…I just don't want to make a big deal out of things. Especially us. I mean, what does it matter if we're both female? And I just tend to…downplay things."

"Bella, your father is not Generation Y. He can't handle something as cavalierly as your generation can. That's not to say that he can't come around but you've got to ease him into it. And I didn't appreciate going in there blind. Though, I'm rather mad at myself for not seeing it."

"I'm sorry," I whispered again. "Were you…planning on keeping us a secret from him?"

"Of course not. A little warning would have been nice, though. Maybe you could remember that, should there be a next time?"

"Yes, ma'am,"

Alice giggled then, shaking her head at me. "Don't call me ma'am," she said, still laughing. I nodded and asked if we were okay. She responded by grabbing my gloved hand and kissing it, her lips lingering before she nodded. We drove in silence again, but it was much more peaceful this time, and I enjoyed it. I guess technically speaking you could call that our first 'fight.' Not a bad one to start off with. I smirked at my reflection in the mirror as Alice parked the car along a dirt road and hopped out. In an instant, my side of the door was opened and she helped me down. "We have to walk a ways. Rather, I have to walk a ways," she said, winking at me. Before I could ask her what she meant, I was on her back. I gripped her shoulders for a moment, gaining my bearings, before I let out an amused chuckle.

"I'm sure this looks comical," I whispered into her ear. She nodded and told me to hold on tight. In seconds we were off. I'd never been on a horse before, but something told me that this is what riding a champion racehorse would feel like. I was moving with Alice, feeling like I was a part and factor of the speed we were gaining. The cold air was singeing my cheeks and it was hard to breathe but I didn't feel like oxygen was necessary at the moment. It was a wonderful experience, one that ended all too soon as I felt her slowing.

"Here we are, milady," Alice said, gently letting me slide off of her back. We were at the edge of a large field, one that was covered in pure, untouched snow. I looked out and in the middle of the field I could see the rest of the Cullen family milling about. Alice grasped my hand and we began heading towards them. Though they seemed far away the walk only took us a few minutes. Esme and Carlisle, who were merely standing in the snow, watching everyone else, smiled as we neared.

"Good morning, Bella. Is it cold enough for you?" Esme asked, her smile growing with every word. I nodded, rubbing my hands together for added effect. Looking around, I noticed that Edward and Emmett were engaged in what looked like a serious snowball fight. White balls were flitting before my eyes with remarkable speed and I smiled as I watched them. Rosalie was a few feet away to my left. She was concentrating hard on a snowman, the body of him literally perfect spheres as she smoothed and refined them to perfection comparable to her own. When I looked back to Carlisle, I noticed that he was turned away to the snowball fight. I followed his eyes and discovered Alice creeping up on Emmett. In her hands was the condom I'd given her. In mere moments she had filled it ten times its size with snow and was now in the process of lifting it over her head. Edward paused, seeing what she was about to do and the action caused Emmett to turn around. Alice squealed with surprise and hurled the frozen water balloon at him. It hit him square in the face, exploding like a firework of confetti all over him. Edward fell behind his makeshift fort, laughing as Emmett chased after Alice, the both of them mere blurs to my human eyes.

A tap on the shoulder disrupted me from my thoughts. Esme smiled at me and reached for my hand, placing something in it. "I think Rosalie would like this," she said quietly, gesturing to the blonde. I gulped, looking down to examine the article in my hand. There were two articles actually. Two brightly violet buttons rested in my palm. They were shiny and reflected off of the sun like polished stones. Esme nodded, pushing me a bit towards Rosalie's direction and I began to move my feet. The walk towards her was slow, agonizing, and I felt like I was walking to my death. Rosalie's back was turned to me and while she didn't acknowledge my presence, I knew she knew I was coming. I crouched down, making sure I had my bearings. God help me if I fell onto Rosalie's snowman. My knees hit the snow with a crunch and she finally turned around, taking me in with her beautiful eyes. I stared, not knowing what else to do, and extended my hand. Rosalie stared at it as if it was garbage and my cheeks reddened as I opened my palm.

"Esme said that you might, um, like these," I offered, amazed that I could find my words. Rosalie's eyes stayed locked on mine for a moment too long before they finally drifted to the buttons. She took them quickly and I didn't even feel her touch my hand. I watched as she placed them, from what I could tell, perfectly symmetrically apart. And they looked beautiful. Rosalie sighed, staring almost longingly at the violet buttons, then turned her head, just barely looking my way.

"Thank you," she said. And while I appreciated it, I could tell it was nothing but her upbringing that made her say that. She said it because it was the polite thing to do. I could bet she'd rather stuff my gloves down my throat. I nodded, stepping cautiously away until I was out of falling-on-snowman range. Once I was free, I looked around, finding no sight of Alice. Just when I was about to turn around, she collided with my back, sending me face first into the snow.

My head shot up, burning from the cold and I shook my head, trying to get the snow out of…everywhere. Alice was laughing hysterically on top of me and I tried to roll over in an attempt to get her back, but it was to no avail. "Sorry, Bella," Alice laughed into my ear. "Looks like I got you pinned." Just as I was about to retort, a snowball pelted the pixie square in the nose. I looked in front of me to see Emmett charging us with a pile of snowballs in his arms. Edward was close behind.

"Don't worry, Bella! We're coming to the rescue!" Emmett bellowed, chucking another snowball at Alice. Alice muttered an obscenity and rolled off of me, running to hide behind Esme as she gathered her own firepower. Esme glared at Emmett, daring him to throw a snowball and Emmett lowered his hand, momentarily defeated by the mom look. Edward was busy staring at Alice as well and I took the opportunity to pick up a handful of snow. I chunked it as hard as I could at Edward, watching as it sailed over his tall hair... and landing on the back of Rosalie's head. My eyes burst out of their sockets as she slowly turned around, her eyes falling directly on me alone. I tried to form an apology but fear overtook my vocal cords. My knees were giving so maybe it would have been a good idea to fall on them and beg for mercy. She stood like an angel of death, grabbing a handful of snow as she did so. Her eyes held nothing but loathing and I knew that surely there was a rock mixed in with that snowball. This was not fun. This was going to be guilt-free pain infliction for her. She glowered further and pulled her arm back and I cringed, covering my face with my arms and preparing for the worst snowball fight of my life.

But no snowball came. Curious, I peeked one eye out and looked around. Rosalie was no longer staring at me and the snowball she was holding had dropped to the ground. I lowered my hands, noticing that everyone was focused on Alice, who looked utterly terrified and in the middle of a vision. When she came out of it, Carlisle stepped closer, urging her to speak. "Three of them are coming out of the woods. They're hungry. They heard us," she said, eyeing Carlisle.

"How close are they?"

"Thirty seconds," she whispered, closing her eyes. "I don't know why I didn't see them sooner. They're coming out of Quileute territory." Her eyes then turned to me, and everyone else's followed. I didn't know what to think until I heard a rustling from the trees, a scattering of birds, and an unfamiliar cackle coming my way.


	17. Chapter 17

See Shep Shred Part II

By the time I turned my head, they were already midfield and coming quickly towards us. Alice was by my side, and she pulled my hood up, arranging my hair around my face. Rosalie snorted and Alice shot her a glare. "Don't speak, okay? I'm not going to let anything happen to you," she whispered in a tone that I couldn't help but believe. I nodded, feeling Esme come to my left side with Emmett came at my right. They were standing kind of next to me but more so in front of me. Carlisle was in front of everyone and though these newcomers wouldn't know it, he looked a bit nervous. These new three were very clearly vampires, but there was nothing about them that I liked. They were deathly pale and even from a distance I could see that their eyes were a deep red. They looked like real death and acted like it too. The one in the front was blonde, shirtless and had a cocky look on his face that made me want to cringe. There was an African American man to his left with long dred locks and a sort of uneasy expression that appeared permanent on his face. On the other side was a redhead. I couldn't bring myself to look at her for too long.

"It sounded like you guys were having fun," the blonde said as he approached us. "I was wondering if we could join you?"

"We were just finishing up," Carlisle said perhaps a bit too quickly. However the field is at your bidding. Please, enjoy yourselves." He waved his arm across the field and the man nodded.

"We were just looking for something to eat," he said casually and Carlisle's eyelids flickered.

"Would you mind terribly heading a few miles up to do your hunting? We have a permanent residence here, and would not like to be found out." The doctor said, more than polite. The man looked intrigued and he glanced between his two partners.

"Permanently? How to do you manage—

He stopped then, his eyes falling on Alice. The redhead looked back and forth between him and Alice then took a step forward, as if she was going to protect him. His eyes raked over Alice's face, then her body, and her face again. All the while his grin grew more and more sinister. "Hello, Alice," he said finally, her name sounding foreign on his tongue. "It's been so long. Who would have thought that I would see you again? The only one that ever got away." Emmett snarled, protective of his sister, and I watched as Rosalie sought out his hand, which seemed to calm him instantly. Alice's eyes narrowed as she distanced herself from us, taking a step closer to him.

"Have we met?" she asked, her eyes darting to the redhead, smirking at her, daring her to make a move. It was a look that made my stomach fall and I felt myself wavering between running and collapsing to the floor. Deciding not to draw attention, I subtly leaned against Esme, who stood strong against me, supporting me. The foreigner chuckled, opening his arms as if he expected her to fall into them.

"Don't you remember? The asylum? I was the one that woke you from your sleep almost every night. I was the one that snuck into your room, whispering terrible things to encourage the nightmares." He smirked again and my throat became dry as the pieces of the puzzle were falling together. Alice, much more practiced that I was, didn't change her expression at all.

"Who are you?" she asked, her hands clenching and unclenching. The man bowed, looking up at her as he did so.

"James, at your service. And this is Victoria, my mate and Laurent, an old friend." He gestured to the other two. Neither of them looking very satisfied with the situation.

"And it was you that was at the asylum. What did you want with me?" she asked, her eyes darting to Edward. He made no motion that I saw, but she seemed satisfied and looked back at James. He scoffed as if she'd asked the most ridiculous question in the world and reached out to stroke her cheek. Alice allowed him to do so and I felt a fire burning somewhere in my core.

"I wanted to catch you, Alice. I wanted to catch you at your most vulnerable state and drink your blood and turn you into one of us. You were exceptional, even as a human. Any moron could see that. And I wanted you. I wanted you all for myself. But you were strong. It took time. And when you were almost ready, someone else took my prize from me." He gave a somber chuckle, one that I could tell none of us liked. "You know, I am quite the sore loser. I wish there was some way I could feel a little bit better about losing you." He dipped his hand under her chin, lifting her face up to meet his eyes. The redhead glared at Alice, her claws bearing and I exhaled, realizing that I'd been holding my breath for the entire time. It must have been too loud, for James looked over at me. His eyes met mine and I watched his nostrils flare. He grinned at me, then went back to Alice.

"Is this a present? For me? Did you see me coming, Alice? Were you aware of how hurt I was at losing you to someone else? Did you bring a snack to welcome me back into your life?" He made a step towards me and Emmett growled again, daring him to come closer. Rosalie made no attempt to rein him in this time.

"You will not touch her," Alice snarled, her full lips rising over her shining teeth. James made a pouting face.

"Oh, come now; is this any way to treat a guest? She smells delicious. Just one bite, Alice. She smells divine." My body began to shake and before I think anyone could realize it, he was just behind me. I felt his arms around my waist and I could feel his cold breath on my neck and the sticky feeling of his teeth on my skin. And that was all. Because in the instant it took to feel all of those things, he was off of me, and Alice was on top of him. She growled in a tone so feral that had I not witnessed myself I would have never thought it coming from her.

"You…will…not…touch…her!" she repeated, slicing at his face with each word. Esme grabbed my wrist, hurling me back and I landed a few feet away from everyone. Emmett had Laurent in a chokehold and the redhead and Rosalie were merely two blurs at the other end of the field. Alice howled again and I looked over to see her…to see her rip his head off.

Alice ripped a man's head off. Alice. I felt dizzy and placed my hands on the cool snow, bringing some up to my heated cheeks. Carlisle was by Emmett's side and I watched as he grabbed Laurent's neck, jerking it violently. My head starting swimming even more and couldn't help myself as I turned over and vomited. Something cold was running down my arm and I pulled up my sleeve. Esme's nail had caught my skin, and there was a small wound, bleeding just a bit. The blood woke me from my daze. In an instant my wrist was to my mouth, my lips clasped firmly over the wound, sucking it dry. This was probably the worst time ever to be bleeding and I could only hope that it stopped before anyone could notice.

Alice was now concerned with ripping James' limbs apart and in my shock I watched her. It was so feral, so violent. It was not Alice. It was not Alice. It was not Alice. Her eyes were black as night, her teeth, while having no fangs, glimmered sharp as razors in the blinding winter sun. Esme was by her side, helping her and I could see Carlisle and Emmett doing the same with Laurent. Edward, Rosalie and the redhead were nowhere to be found and I found myself shaking, the wound having been sucked dry and falling from my chapped lips. Rosalie came out of nowhere, standing by Esme's side. She handed something to her mother, then proceeded over to Carlisle. Flames arose and I didn't know how. Then there were two flames. They were warm. I wanted to go near them but found that I couldn't use my legs, or any part of my body. Then, as quickly as the flames disappeared, they were gone. And there was no smoke, there was no ash. There were only two patches of yellowed soggy grass, looking horribly out of place.

None of the Cullens made any attempt to move after that. They stayed watching the grass as if at any moment, James or Laurent would come popping out of the ground, like some sick horror film. Another scattering of birds and Edward was by Carlisle's side. "I chased her about a hundred or so miles away," he said, running a hand through his hair. I don't think she'll be coming back." Carlisle nodded and patted his son on the shoulder as if he were proud of him. It seemed an odd thing to do. I don't know if I made a noise or not but suddenly everyone's eyes were on me, Alice's included. She was the first to reach me and she knelt down tentatively, extending her hand towards me. All the while I looked at her eyes. They were still pitch black and scary as hell but I could tell that some of her restraint had come back. And the person looking at me now was the Alice Cullen that I knew. I took her hand and pulled her into an embrace, squeezing her tightly. She mumbled a slew of apologies but I could pay no mind to any of them. I was just glad that she was in my arms. When she finally pulled away, she smiled at me. I returned it, breathing a sigh of relief as I did so.

And then the look came back.

And then she was not Alice anymore.

It took only an instant for me to feel the metallic taste of my own blood on my tongue. And it took even less time to realize exactly what I'd done. But even that time was not fast enough to stop Alice from changing, to get her away from me. She growled, low and guttural like alley dog, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as she inhaled. I gasped, opening my mouth again and Alice lunged. I was on my back and Alice's teeth were on my neck. It would be less than a second, some pain, and I would be dead. Or I would be a vampire like them. I thought about screaming but by voice had long since gone. Pressure was being applied and I heard the first layer of my skin tear as I thought about the last conversation I'd had with my father.

And then Alice was off of me. And someone was pulling me away. I looked up at the black sleeve dragging me, up the arm and into the eyes of Edward. He was pulling me away. Pulling me away from Alice. I resisted then, surprising the vampire and turned my eyes back towards where she was. But it still was not her. Alice was now in Rosalie's unrelenting arms, fighting to get out. She was mad, snarling and growling like a rabid beast, though it hurt to compare to such. Her long nails dragged themselves along Rosalie's beautiful arms, ripping her shirt, and I saw the marks they were leaving. She was marring Rosalie. She was marring what most would consider perfection. And perfection was letting it happen. Rosalie stood, still as a statue, and held Alice. Emmett had reached them now and he had grabbed a hold of Alice's hands, stopping the torture. Esme was by Alice's side, pulling her face towards her, whispering words that no one could hear. Carlisle was making his way towards me and Edward had started dragging me again. I fought against his pull but it was to no use. When Alice was merely a mirage in the snow, Edward stopped, dropping me to the ground

My first instinct was to run. Get up and run to Alice. But Carlisle was blocking my way. "Bella, you need to stay," he commanded, using a tone that would intimidate even Rosalie. I stopped obediently, choosing instead to stare past his shoulder. He sighed, looking more than pissed off me, and rubbed his hands together. "Bella, I think it's time we took you home now."

"No…no, I don't…" My voice had returned but it still wasn't sure of what to say. I looked back and forth from the yellowed grass to the mirages to Edward and Carlisle. Nothing was making any sense. This dream was taking a cruel turn in my demented mind and I didn't like it.

"Your life almost ended," Carlisle said tersely, looking at me as if I was petulant. "We've all got a lot of things to think about." Carlisle then spoke to Edward, the words coming out at such speeds that they sounded like a hum to me. Edward nodded, helping me to my feet again, keeping one hand firmly clamped on my arm. He started to pull away and I resisted again. "No," I said through gritted teeth, my feet losing traction in the snow. "I won't leave until I know she's okay."

Carlisle sighed, holding up a hand to Edward, who stopped pulling. We stared each other down for a few moments as his eyes searched mine. Neither of us could reach each other. Of that I was certain. The doctor opened his mouth to speak, only to recoil and turn around as Rosalie suddenly came into view. "She's calm. She's devastated," she said slowly, looking to me as she did. I stared lazily at her arms. The woods looked deep, but there was no blood. I wondered if vampires could get scars. Carlisle nodded and they all looked to me. I had gotten what I wanted. Alice was fine. And while that wasn't all that I wanted, it would seem that it was what I had to settle for. I let my head fall dejectedly as Edward began taking me away again. No, I couldn't leave. I couldn't leave like this.

"Rosalie," I called, causing the blonde to turn and stare at me. "Thank you."

She looked confused for a moment, then angry. Her arms crossed across her chest and she looked me up and down. "I didn't do it for you," was all she said. And that was enough. Edward was silent as he drove the Jeep wildly down the street. I couldn't find myself to care at the dangerous speeds. My hands were shaking, I felt like I was going to be sick again, and I didn't dare open my mouth. My shock was wearing off, and the reality of what had just taken place was becoming all too clear for me. The images replayed over and over in my mind as I tried to work some kind of reason into them.

Alice had ripped James' head off. Alice had ripped James to pieces. Both James and Laurent had been set on fire. Alice had attacked me. Rosalie had saved me. Rosalie's intent was not to save me. Nausea built up in my throat and I tried desperately to swallow it back down. Edward was glowering and he screeched the car to a stop as he pulled up in front of my house. He leaned back in the seat, exhaling, staring straight ahead and down the road. I couldn't find the strength to open the door. There was a foreboding feeling that came with leaving this car. I didn't like it. I didn't like the way this was all working out. I wanted to see Alice. I wanted to see her right now. And at the same time I didn't. At the same time I was scared. I was scared of her, and that was hard to admit but it was the truth. Edward exhaled again and I knew that I was supposed to take my leave. But I couldn't let it all end here. I had to know. I had to know what was going on. But all I could manage to do was squeak out his name. "Edward?"

He looked at me, studying my eyes. I knew that my mouth was quivering and I was crying and I probably looked like hell. Who knew if the smell of blood was still in my mouth. But at this moment I didn't care. He looked me over once more, then turned his head back to the road. "You're a danger to us," he said finally, his hand gripping the steering wheel. "You put my family in danger. Today proved that. It proved what I've always though. We're vampires. We're different. You're a human. No matter how much one wants it to be, sometimes things just don't work out. This is one of those cases, Bella." He glanced at me longingly, as if he regretted the speech he was giving.

"What's going to happen?" I asked, my throat croaking with dryness. He shrugged, reaching over me to open my door.

"Get some rest Bella. I need to get back to my family." He emphasized the last two words, and never in my life had I felt so unwanted. I felt like retaliating, but there was no point. So I climbed slowly out of the car, slammed the door shut and watched as Edward took off down the street. My knees began to shake as I wondered if that was the last time I would ever see the Cullens.


	18. Chapter 18

Marked

My father was not home. I knew that from the lack of car in the driveway, but I didn't really want to believe it until I got in the door and felt the quiet of the house. It was disappointing. I wasn't up for talking with my father right now, but it would have been nice if he'd just been here. I saw a note on the kitchen table and glanced at it. He went to help with frozen pipes at the Black's house. He'd be out all day. This probably wasn't the best time for me to go on suicide risk.

I managed a weak laugh despite my slowly developing depression. I'd never, never do something as stupid as suicide. Especially over a lost love, no matter how powerful I thought that love might have been. Please. But, that didn't deny the fact that I was feeling sick to my stomach, and empty, and alone. Oh, and I was cold. My fingers were turning into that stinging pain as a result from being too cold and I sighed as I ripped my non-waterproof gloves off. They were red and the heated house made them tingle in an unpleasant way. I could use a hot shower in more ways than one. The hike up the stairs was slow. I really didn't want to be dealing with them at this moment, but couldn't bring myself to care enough to do anything otherwise. I was sort of robotic. And, this would have been a very interesting 'me' study were I not on the verge of some sort of breakdown. I just had to make it to the shower.

And I did. The water was hot, probably too hot. But then again…apathy. I stood in the shower, feeling my cold toes burn as they tried to adjust to the temperature. I didn't realize that I was so tense but when the water hit my back it instantly released and I felt like I could really breathe. Of course, this newly found breath wasn't all that great when it turned into a heaving sob. I knew it was lame and weak but I couldn't really control myself. No, it wasn't lame and weak. I had a right to be sad about my girlfriend right now! I had not one but two different pairs of teeth on my neck! I was going to cry and be proud of my tears! So I did. I cried until the water turned cold. By then I'd run out of tears and was trying to desperately buck myself up.

I mean, no one had really said anything about leaving. No one had said goodbye in that certain tone that indicated it was for forever. For all I knew, Alice might be waiting for me on my bed. The thought made my heart leap with hope and I tried to push it back down in my chest cavity. I didn't see the point in creating new tears so easily. But wallowing in a cold shower wasn't really helping my point, so I climbed out and put my jeans and shirt back on. My entire body felt lethargic as I headed to my room. I tried to account it to the lost adrenaline but it could have been a multitude of things. A multitude of things I didn't really want to think about right now. Reminding myself that I didn't know if someone awaited me on the other side, I opened my door.

My window was shut, and there was no one on my bed. However there was someone standing in my room. Someone big. I watched their large shoulders rise and fall with each angered breath. The room smelled unfamiliar and it was hot in here. It was never hot in my room. I turned on the lights slowly. What was left of my adrenaline came racing back to my heart and I backed away as the light filled the room, only to breathe a sigh of semi-relief. Of course, as quickly as that came it was replaced with anger

"What the hell, Jacob? What are you doing in my room?" I asked weakly, my eyes raking over his strange attire. Cut off sweat pants and nothing else. No shirt, no shoes, who knew about underwear. He glared at me and I returned it, my eyes falling to his very, very muscular midsection. "Steroids?" I commented, walking over to my bed and laying down. I didn't enjoy this whole lethargic apathy but it was better than the alternative. Under no circumstances was I going to cry in front of Jacob. Neither of us deserved that right now, though he was definitely working on it with that glare he was giving me. He stalked over to my bed, his chest still heaving from his angered breaths. He was shaking and he crouched down, eye level with me.

"I told you not to go with Alice," he growled, causing the throes of my chest to increase. "I told you not to go with her and look what happened!" He began shaking again and I crawled to the edge of my bed. I was really attracting the violence today. Jacob growled then, something low and guttural in the pit of his gut. He stood quickly, pacing away from my bed and after a few minutes he seemed calmer, although still angry. I found myself unable to speak. Jacob couldn't know. There was no way that Jacob was in that field. The Cullens were too careful to risk getting caught, right? Jacob was by my bed again and I didn't even see him move.

"Bella, did they hurt you?" he asked, reaching out to brush the hair from my face. I pulled away but his hand stayed in the air, lingering on where my cheek would have been.

"No, I'm not hurt. In fact, what are you talking about, Jacob?" I asked, pulling my knees to my chest. He looked away, running a hand through his long hair.

"Bella, I know, okay? Let's not beat around the bush here. I know about the Cullens, I know about those other…people that showed up. I know that there was a fight and I definitely know that there were only two fires when there should have been three. You need to tell me what happened."

My mouth fell open and I didn't even dare pulling it back up. There was no way in hell he knew what was going on. He couldn't have known. He was just messing with me. Alice didn't say anything about Jacob, ever. No, I wasn't going to give into what he wanted. I wasn't going to ruin the Cullen's secret and ensure them leaving. I looked into Jacob's dark brown eyes and I could tell that he was concerned. Despite him not returning my calls for awhile, I still considered him a good friend. Lying to him was not something I would enjoy, but I had to protect Alice. "Nothing happened." Jacob glared and was preparing to demand something else of me when I interrupted him. "How about you tell me what's going on with you. You never answered my steroids question."

"I'm not on steroids. There, now tell me the truth."

"Then what the hell, Jake? You're ripped!" I reached out to push his shoulder and felt it practically singe against my palm. "And you're hotter than hell. Are you sick?" Jacob sniffed, wiping his nose as he stood and looked away from me.

"Something like that."

I stood up from the bed, my knees wobbling and Jacob reached out to steady me. Even through my shirt I could feel his heat and I stepped out of his grasp, pulling my shirt off of my shoulder to cool it. The window must have been opened because while it was warm at first, it was now chilly and fresh in my room. He looked down at his hands and sighed. He tried to pocket them but there were none in his ripped sweats so he settled for glaring at my carpet. He muttered some form of apology and I nodded.

"So, uh, how's your truck running?"

"Great, thanks. Thanks for taking out the dent. It looks really good."

"No problem. Look, I'm sorry I haven't called, or socialized or anything. It's just that some things have come up that I needed to tend to."

"Like what?"

Jacob looked up at me and looked like a wounded puppy. It was strange that that image was so clear to me but I couldn't help it. Then his eyes grew hard and he looked away, shrugging. "Just stuff…I don't have to tell you."

"No, you don't. But do you really have to be such an asshole right now? If you knew what happened today you should know that maybe I'm a bit fragile." The words came out angry and bitter and I was glad that they did. Jacob was making it really difficult for me to not fall into a pit of despair. I heard Jacob sigh and by the time I looked up he was by my side. He placed his arm over my shoulder, rubbing softly on my back.

"I'm sorry. You're right. I just can't help but be nervous sometimes. It's dangerous, you know, hanging out with them."

I pulled away, his arm rubbing against my neck as I did so. It burned, like the skin was tender and I tried to ignore it and focus on my guest. "I don't want to talk about them."

"Yeah well I do, Bella. They're—

"Did you not hear me?" I shouted, turning my neck with such force that it stung the side of it again. "I don't want to talk about them, Jake! I don't care about your opinions of them because they're not your friends! Want me to talk trash about Quil or Embry? About how they left you to hang out with Sam?" Jacob growled, taking a large step towards me so that he was right in my face. He seemed to tower over me and I could feel the heat radiating from his exposed chest.

"Don't say anything about Sam. You don't know what he does for us."

I blinked a few times, looking around the room as he stepped back, calming himself down. I turned around, unable to look at him and threw my hands to the ceiling. "Does anyone else but Bella see the hypocrisy? Anyone at all?" I shouted to my wall, exasperated. I then turned to Jacob, gesturing with my hand to his body. "So, I must tell you about the Cullens right? I must hang off of your every word. But god forbid you have to answer a question! This isn't the twenties, Jacob, and I will not be treated like this by you! I thought we were friends."

"We are friends," he answered with a finality that made me feel a little bit better.

"Then why won't you tell me anything? Where have you been? I've missed you, Jake."

He sighed, moving over to the window and placing his large arms on it. As I thought, it was opened and he breathed deeply. He was struggling and while a part of me wanted to go over and comfort him, I refrained. After a few moments he turned back around and sat on my bed, gesturing for me to do the same. When I was sitting by his side he spoke again.

"Okay, remember what I said about Sam?" I nodded. "Well, it turns out I was wrong. He's really helping Quil and Embry and now me. See, we've got this thing that we have to learn to control and he's helping us do that."

"What sort of thing?"

"Okay, now I really can't tell you that, Bella. I'm sworn to secrecy by my brothers."

"Are…are you in a cult?"

"No, it's nothing like that." Jacob laughed and I had forgotten how it sounded. It was loud and strong. I liked it a lot. I missed it a lot.

"I miss you, Jake," I said quietly, taking his heated hand in mine. "I miss my best friend."

"I thought Alice was your best friend." He said the words bitterly, but I ignored them.

"Alice is my girlfriend. You are my best friend."

Jacob stiffened next to me and before I could react he was off the bed. And he was shaking again. "She's your girlfriend? That fucking inhuman leech is your girlfriend?" I gasped at his language and stood up to retaliate, only to have him grab my shoulders. He shook me once before I could break free and as I stepped back from him he screamed again. "Bella, you can't be serious!"

"I am serious, Jacob Black!" I shouted back, taking another step towards him. "You've no right to talk about what you don't understand! Alice is wonderful and damn you if you say another thing about her." Jacob was about to scream again when I reached out and slapped him hard across the face. He took a step back, putting his palm to his cheek. I felt my own hand throbbing and raw with the force of the slap. But it felt good. It felt like victory. Jacob had made it known that he knew more than he should have. But I'd be damned if I let him say one bad thing about Alice and get away with it. I smirked a bit, thinking about how she would, and did, the exact same thing for me. Jacob clutched at his hair, his knuckles turning white as he pulled on it. He looked like he was seizing as he fell to the floor, his muscles rippling as they tried to control the convulsions. I wanted to reach out and help him, but I was too scared. And I didn't know what would set him off again. He started making strange noises that accompanied his groans of agony. I couldn't take it anymore. I reached out and placed my hand to his shoulder.

He jumped back, catlike almost with his reflexes and glared at me. But it wasn't really at me. He was glaring at whatever he was thinking about and something in his eyes told me that it wasn't me. He took several large breaths, his eyes never leaving mine. Then he came forward and reached out to me. I wanted to pull back, but I was standing against my bed and there was nowhere to go. So I let him touch me, let his hand fall down my cheek. I could feel his calloused fingertips against my skin and couldn't control the blush that arose. "I'm sorry," he whispered, his hand travelling to push the hair past my shoulder. His fingers grazed the tenderness on my neck and I hissed. His eyes fell to the wound and he stepped back like there was something horrible on my body. I grabbed at my neck in paranoia, feeling nothing but the small wound and watched as he began to shake his head madly.

"Those fucking leeches. They won't get away with this," he muttered. Before I could get a word in, he looked to me. His eyes were filled with disappointment. I felt my knees go weak as Jacob began to shake again. He raced towards the window and leapt over it like it was a short fence. I screamed and raced over to the window, only to find that he had landed and was in the process of running into the woods. I watched him until he disappeared from sight. Then I closed the window and locked it. I was done with people sneaking in tonight. My room was too quiet now and I focused on the sound of my erratic breathing to drown my thoughts. My feet were heavy as I made my way to the small mirror I'd taped to my wall. My fingers felt numb against my desk lamp but somehow I managed to turn it on. I grabbed my hair, pulling it away from my neck. I had to crane a bit to get it out of the shadow but when the light of the lamp finally shone on the wound, I sighed sadly and let my hair fall.

Teeth Marks.


	19. Chapter 19

Messenger

I slept last night, which was a surprise. That didn't mean that I slept well, however. I knew that I had a lot of dreams and that most of them were nightmares. However, every time I woke up in the night, covered in sweat and my throat dry, whatever it was that had frightened me was gone from my memory. That, and my neck was aching all night. I laid in bed for two hours, feeling the pain and the pulsing in my neck and wondering if when I woke up I would be a vampire. The thought should have terrified me but it didn't. Alice didn't like to talk about transformations much and as a result I didn't really know what it pertained. Maybe it was just this: a dull pain and when you woke up you were a vampire. It was a nice thought, but something told me that it wasn't that easy. Alice had mentioned venom a few times, and that was what had to be causing the pain. Maybe it wasn't enough to change me. Maybe it just hurt like hell to piss me off. That seemed like a vampire-y thing to do.

Even though I woke up early, I decided to lie in bed. I didn't really feel like doing anything. Waiting for Alice or any of the Cullens seemed like a better idea than doing anything else. Charlie hadn't bothered me all morning either. Probably because it was the weekend. I was grateful for that. I didn't really like this feeling. It was like dread and heartache and hope. And the hope part was annoying me because it made me feel like a loser. I was hoping that Alice wouldn't be mad and hoping that the Cullen's wouldn't leave and hoping that Jacob wasn't going to do anything stupid and I just felt way too much like a Disney movie. Lazily, I looked out the window. It didn't look as cold as it was yesterday and it didn't look like any new snow had fallen. Standing up for the first time this morning I headed over and looked out the window. The snow was in fact, melting. So much for that. A part of me had been hoping that we would get enough snow to cancel school. Fat chance of that now. I sighed heavily, pursing my lips together so that they made a funny noise and headed to my closet. I pulled on my favorite shirt that still smelled just a bit like Alice and some new jeans. Still feeling a bit cold, I headed over to my bed and swiped the comforter off of it, wrapping it around my shoulders. Completely mummified in my comforter, I awkwardly fell back on the bed. I'd never wanted someone as desperately as I wanted Alice to be here now. Was this pathetic, or was this love? I didn't know. I just knew that the comforter held her scent like a prized perfume and I inhaled deeply, convincing myself that those weren't tears in my eyes.

And then there was a tap on my window. I literally felt my heart clench as my eyes raced to the window. A vampire was standing on the tree outside, waiting for me. It wasn't the one I wanted, however. In fact, it was probably the last one on the list that I wanted to see. Rosalie's reflection glared back at her from the window and she raised a brow impatiently at me. I swallowed, feeling fear enter me as I unwrapped myself from the comforter. She appeared to get more impatient with each step and by the time I'd actually reached the window I was jogging. I unlatched the window and opened it, stepping back so that she could come in. However, she didn't move. Instead, she crouched on the tree limb she was standing on and extended a long arm out towards me. Her beautiful hand unfolded and one long finger reached out, curling and beckoning me towards her. Now here was the fear I was supposed to be feeling in the presence of a vampire.

She was sent here to kill me. I knew it. The family had probably decided on it. I knew too much and had seen too much. And of course Rosalie was the one that would be more than happy to do the job. My body began to tremble and I couldn't look away from her golden eyes. She appeared to be amused, although her face was stoic and she watched my legs as I stepped back to the window. The chill of the morning hit me, but not as hard as her glare and I swallowed hard, feeling like my heart would palpitate out of my chest. When I finally reached the window, I placed my hands on the sill to steady myself, exhaling into the wind. Rosalie closed her eyes at that and I noticed her chest rising and falling slowly. When she finally looked up at me again, her face was just maybe a hair softer than before. Or I was saying that for my own peace of mind.

"Alice wishes to speak to you. I've been sent on her behalf." She looked unhappy about that burden but I couldn't be more relieved. I wasn't going to die…yet. That helped my nerves for like two seconds.

"Why didn't Alice come herself?" I asked as politely as I could, not wanting this girl to take anything I said the wrong way. Rosalie didn't answer for a moment and I turned around to grab my jacket, beckoning her in out of instinct as I did so. The moment my back was turned, I regretted it. Because I knew the minute I turned around she would be right behind me. I would scream and she would rip out my throat to shut me up. I put my jacket on, listening intently for any clue of Rosalie's presence. But I would only hear her if she wanted me to hear her so it was futile. Taking a deep breath, I turned around quickly…and saw that she was still outside, crouching on the tree limb. Clearly I had taken too long, judging by her expression and I looked down as I headed back to the window.

"Alice isn't fit for tree climbing or driving at the moment," she said quickly and disgustedly, as if the words were acid in her mouth. She really hated this job. And it was because she really hated me. I looked down again, feeling ashamed in her regal presence, and heard the tree limb shake. When I looked up again Rose was about two feet closer to me. For a split second that I most likely imagined, her eyes held concern. However, the moment passed all too quickly and she was stoic once more. She jerked her head, urging me to hurry and I nodded pointing downstairs. She returned the nod once and I shut the window. She was gone before I even noticed, and I was looking at her the entire time. Not wanting to make her even angrier, I threw my shoes on, not bothering to lace them and bounded down the stairs. Clearly the wrath of Rosalie was great because I didn't trip once down the stairs in unlaced shoes. My body must have gone in survival mode. Charlie was nowhere to be found but there was another note on the table. I could read it later.

Rosalie was waiting in some kind of black Mercedes and I ran out to her, slipping on the ice. I flailed around like a moron for a second before my feet caught themselves. My cheeks began to fume and as I looked back up at the vampire, I noticed that she was out of the car, one foot extended in front of the other. She could not have been running to save me. No, no, no. And really, I didn't think she could look more pissed than before but here she was, absolutely seething. I nodded to her and reached the car door without any further mishaps. I climbed in the car and shut the door, getting to work on my shoes. When I was halfway done with tying the first one, I realized we weren't moving. Taking a deep breath, I looked up at the vampire and noticed that she was staring at me with a raised eyebrow. I raised both of my eyebrows innocently and she jerked her head to the left.

"Seatbelt…please," she said between gritted teeth. I contemplated saying 'yes, ma'am,' as that was what I was taught when I was being polite. But something told me that Rosalie would take that the wrong way so I simply nodded and clicked it into place. My cheeks began to blush again. Because I always put my seatbelt on. The one time when someone notices and the one time I had to forget, it would be in the car with Rosalie. However, the seatbelt seemed to please her as her face relaxed and she pulled the car out of the driveway with ease. When my shoes were tied I sat back up, crossing my arms over my chest. It was cold in the car. I glanced at the dials and noticed that Rosalie had the air conditioner cranked up to the max. Christ. I exhaled and watched my breath swirl in the air. This was insane. And I was really scared. I know that was a mean thing to say about my girlfriend's sister but she was scary! And the silence was killing me. I had to speak, even if it was to Rosalie.

"You know, um, having the air conditioner on wastes gas. If you wanted you could, um, roll the window down." Rosalie looked at me, her eyes darting back and forth from my eyes to the switches on the car. My heart started to race again and suddenly I was very, very hot. She scoffed and it almost sounded like a laugh before she went back to glaring at the road.

"You're teaching me about cars," she said in disbelief. There went my cheeks again, and there went my head as I felt my chin resting on my chest. I tried to apologize but I couldn't find the words. It was probably futile anyway. She'd think I was being sarcastic or something. Rosalie made a turn, using the ice for extra push as she did so. Rosalie was probably the only person that headed for ice on the road. But despite that, her driving was very smooth, I noticed. Perhaps that came with being a vampire. I looked to her and her eyes met mine. She sighed heavily then glanced at me once more. "Rolling the window down puts drag on the car. The fuel consumed by that overcompensation, depending on the speed, is greater than using the air conditioner. Tell your friends." Was that humor? Shit, I didn't know. I just smiled at her and she obviously didn't return it. "Though, modern cars and nicer cars are so aerodynamic it doesn't matter much anymore."

She looked like she was in a daze. A…a happy daze. She must be fond of cars. I stored that away in my mind and focused on the road. We were surrounded by trees and the road, while covered in snow, felt like it was dirt or something. So, she could indeed be driving me to my death. My heart was beginning to ache from all of the throbbing it was doing but it distracted me from the situation. Rosalie could be driving me to my death, or she could be driving me to Alice, which could be just as bad. These people were such an enigma. And I didn't want to think too heavily on one option only to get proven otherwise. Rosalie gave an exasperated sigh after a few moments of my pondering and I felt her eyes on me.

"Do you have a heart problem?" she asked, her tone shockingly polite. I swallowed hard and shook my head, watching as the politeness withered away. "Then, could you possibly calm down? It's like a herd of elephants are running over my head." She glared at the road again and I placed a hand to my chest. It was beating pretty fast but a herd of elephants? That super hearing must have been more super than I thought. I took deep breaths and looked out the window, watching the blurred trees and pretty soon my heart rate went down to normal. We'd been driving for about five minutes. It seemed a little extensive in my opinion and boredom finally compelled me to talk to Rosalie again.

"Um, Rosalie, do you know how much longer it is?"

"About three minutes,"

"Thank you,"

"You're welcome." It was as if the woman bled etiquette. It was almost shocking to see her so angry but then hear her so polite. Forgive my crudeness but this girl was the epitome of a mind-fuck. But she was speaking to me. And she was speaking to me civilly and maybe this was the only chance I would get at some information before being thrown into Alice's god knows what conversation.

"Rosalie?" She didn't respond but I saw her eye flicker toward me. "I was wondering if you knew what you were driving me to. Like really, really driving me to." She sighed, her hands firmly placed at ten and two on the steering wheel. I felt the leather of the wheel screech after a moment and figured she must have been squeezing it pretty tightly.

"It's not my place to tell you what Alice wants to talk about with you. I'm just the messenger…and the delivery boy, it would seem." I chuckled at that, praying to whomever that she was using humor. There was no response and I took that as good enough.

"Don't take this the wrong way but why did you of all people come and get me?" Rosalie's lips contorted it what could almost possibly be a smirk. But not quite. It was probably Rosalie's equivalent of a smirk and I felt wonderfully proud that I had caused it.

"Everyone thought that you'd put up less of an argument if I came to get you."

"That's probably true," I answered, thinking back on how I'd almost robotically followed each of her commands. God, that was scary. However, I couldn't dwell on that for too long because Rosalie came to a stop. The scenery hadn't changed. There were still trees surrounding us and a long road leading to that same scenery. I sighed, unbuckling the seatbelt, and stepped out of the car. Rosalie did not follow and I felt the cool air singe my cheeks. A flash of movement caught my eye and I turned towards it. Alice was standing by a tree, smiling at me. I returned it and made my way over. She was too far away for me to tell anything other than she was smiling. Each step I took seemed more and more foreboding though and as I finally reached her and saw the fake smile that was plastered to her face, I felt like dying. This wasn't going to turn out well. I could see it. I could feel it.

Without a word, Alice took my hand and pulled me further into the forest. I looked back to the black Mercedes, idling in the snow and wished I could run back to it, wished I could stay in my ignorance. I didn't want this. I didn't want to deal with this. A few more feet into the forest, Alice let me go, turning around to face me. She smiled, and while it was sad, it was genuine. However, I couldn't find the will to return it. I just stared at her, waiting for her to speak the words I didn't want to hear. Her eyes were shining in the snow and she was so pale and looked so pure. I couldn't look at her so I shut my eyes. Her cold fingers touched my cheek and I opened my eyes again, watching her as she watched her hand. It caressed my cheek and then went to my throat. Her fingers grazed over the wound and though her expression was blank I knew that she saw it and I knew that she felt it beneath her fingertips. They lingered on the bite for a moment and while it usually hurt with her touch it felt good. Perhaps because she was so cold.

Alice had been lost in thought. She looked frozen in the snow, a statue. I placed my hand over the one on my neck and pulled her hand to my chest. Alice's eyes met mine and they darted to our locked hands. Undeniable tears were pressing on my eyes and rolling down my cheeks. My voice was cracked and whispered, but I knew she'd hear it. "Please, Alice, don't…." I couldn't finish. I broke down. Everything that I'd suppressed came pouring out into her golden eyes, into her touch, into that goddamned saddened smile. She pulled me to her, standing on her toes to rest her head on my shoulder. I squeezed her as tightly as I could and I felt her shudder against me.

"Bella," she whispered into my ear. She said nothing more than that, she just held me there, consoling me with her presence until I could regain some control. I felt right in her arms. I felt complete, and she was pulling away. I could feel it and I shook my head against her gelled hair, picking her up to hold her as tightly as I wanted. She didn't deny me this and I began crying all over again. Her hands ran up and down my back a few more times before I felt her release me. I sniffled and reluctantly let her go. She didn't even break the fallen snow when she landed on it. I knew that vampires couldn't cry, and yet one look at Alice would have told me otherwise. The sheen of my tears was resting on her left cheek, shining in the sun and looking like her own. It was enough to make my knees quake and Alice must have sensed it for she reached out and took my hands, holding them firmly.

"Bella, I…can't trust myself to be around you. What happened yesterday was my worst nightmare. Had I pulled you off to the side or... who knows what would have happened? I can't do that, Bella. I can't." Her head fell and I placed my hands on her cheeks, lifting her face up to meet my eyes.

"But nothing happened! I'm fine."

Alice shook her head and looked up at me with the saddest eyes I could ever hope to see. "My teeth were in your skin. They felt your flesh, tore your flesh. One more moment and you would have been mine, Bella. I can't risk losing you again."

"So you're leaving me?" I was in hysterics now. My knees finally gave from underneath me and I fell to the ground. Alice was by my side instantly, her hand on my back.

"Bella, I'm your first love. And I almost took your life away. I almost took away your right to live."

"But I don't want to live if you're not here with me!"

"Please, Bella… please try to understand."

"No! No, I don't understand! I want you, Alice. I want you and only you forever!" I was sobbing again, the tears falling onto the snow and melting it away before my eyes. Alice placed her forehead against mine and rocked us for a minute, allowing me to calm down again.

"Bella, I want you too. But I know what I want. I've lived and lived and lived. You're seventeen. I just want you to make sure you know what you want."

"But I do. You're not going to come back if you leave me," I answered, tearing away from her so quickly that I had to put my arms out to catch myself. I must have looked pitiful. I felt pitiful. I felt like throwing up and crawling into a ball and just letting the snow consume me. Alice touched my face and lifted me gently, bringing me next to her. I watched her eyes look me over before she placed her lips to mine. We stayed like that for a long time, neither of us moving, just our lips pressed together. It was the most intimate I had ever been with her, and it broke my heart.

She pulled away just a bit, though our lips were still touching, and I felt my lips chill as she took a breath. "I would always come back. If even if you didn't want me," she murmured. My cheeks warmed with new tears and I pressed my lips to hers again. I didn't understand. My mind was a blur. There was only Alice and there was only now and I was going to try my damndest to keep her here as long as I could. When she pulled away I followed her.

"I'll always want you," I said. She just smiled.

"Take care of yourself, Bella. Live your life; the one that was intended for you."

"When will you come back?"

She bit her bottom lip with her teeth and looked down. I felt the strength leave me as another flash appeared over her left shoulder. Edward. Edward was standing about twenty yards away, standing, watching. I glared at him but couldn't make out if he returned it or not. Alice was still looking down and I brought her face to mine again. "Did he put you up to this? Did he tell you that it was a good idea?" I was almost frantic. Her head was shaking in my grasp with the force of my words.

"No…he's here to protect you."

"Protect me?"

"In case I slip again."

"Alice!" I shouted so loudly that it shocked the both of us. I embraced her, nuzzling the wounded side of my neck against her cheek. "Alice, it wasn't your fault! You were still in attack mode. I was stupid and opened my mouth. It's my fault. Please, Alice, don't listen to him."

"I have to go now, Bella," Alice whispered, standing and taking me with her. "Please, please take care of yourself. If not for me then for the family that loves you."

"You're my family! I love you! Why can't you see that?"

Alice closed her eyes, keeping together what little composure she had left, and opened her eyes to meet mine. "I love you, too. But your safety is worth more than my selfishness. I have to go, Bella. Take care of yourself." She reached up then and kissed my eyelid. Then she kissed my other. And when she kissed my lips one last time it was just a whisper of a touch. I opened my eyes, ready to cling to her again, only to find that she was gone. She was gone. Edward was gone.

I fell to the snow, beating on it with my numbed fists and listening as my sobs echoed through the trees. When I'd beaten through the snow and started hitting the ground I didn't stop. I was pretty sure I'd broken something and was definitely getting frostbitten, but I didn't care. I didn't care. I just wanted…

Warmth fell to my side. Heat surrounded my shoulders and lifted me up in its arms. I clutched onto it, feeling the burn against my torn fingers. A steady heartbeat was hammering in my head as we broke through the clearing. My faithful red Chevy was sitting there and the dent was gone. I couldn't look at it. I felt sick. I turned away and nestled into the warmth, focused on the warmth. With its strength it lifted me into the truck and continued to hold me as it started the engine and took off down the road. I shivered against it, feeling everything and succumbing to it. My eyelids felt heavy and the warmth held me tighter. I was slipping. I was slipping and I didn't know if I was ever going to be able to come back.

"Thank you, Jacob."


	20. Chapter 20

New

One month.

It had been one month since Alice had left, since the entire family left. And I still missed them all terribly. Hell, I even missed Rosalie…but just a little. But, despite the fact that I was still horribly sad over it all, I couldn't deny that I was a little bit proud of myself. I had holed myself up in my room for a few days after Alice left, crying and not eating and all that jazz. Charlie had left me alone then with absolutely no idea of what to do. My mother had called multiple times and I resorted to turning off my phone, alienating myself from the outside world. When Charlie had finally put his foot down and forced me to go to school, I thought it was the end.

I thought that I was going to be a terrible wreck all day. That people would hug me and constantly ask how I was doing. The rumors of the Cullens' disappearances would be all over the school and I didn't want to hear of it.

Much to my surprise, however, it was all handled well. Sure, Angela and Mike and Eric asked about me and I told them, convincingly so, that I was fine. Angela was the only one that didn't seem to believe me and that made me respect her even more. I ended up telling her about Alice and myself just to get it off of my chest. She seemed skeptical at first, and who would blame her? But after some more talking she made it clear that she was here for me and I realized that she would be. Angela was a true friend and I spent the next weeks making up my absences to her. She helped a lot. She took my mind of it, at least on the surface.

Jacob was there too. And Jacob really helped with everything that was beneath the surface. When I had holed myself up in my room, Jacob skipped school to see me. I was too out of it to really talk to him, but his hand always found mine. And while his hand did not provide the icy chill that I wanted, it was there. And I couldn't help but be grateful for that. Jacob also took it upon himself to spend the night sometimes, as the nightmares would still cause me to wake up in a panic. I'd like to think that I told him to leave, but I couldn't. I was too scared of waking up to an empty room. But Jacob was always there, and the nightmares had started to ease. As the time passed and I became less of a shut in, we hung out even more. He listened to me talk and I would have listened to him…if he'd said anything at all.

Now, don't get me wrong. I adored Jacob's company. But he seemed so aloof all of the time. We had never actually gotten around to talking about that day. I mean, it still hurt to think about so why add insult to injury? And Jacob didn't seem to want to talk about it either. But the more I thought about it and the more that I woke up from my dreams with that strange inkling, the more I felt compelled to ask him. We were sitting in my living room with a checkerboard in between us. Jacob was glaring intently at the board as I pondered my next move. Jacob picked up a piece and jumped two of my reds while muttering, "King me," with the smallest hint of pride.

I took one of my nabbed black pieces and set it on top of his. He smiled at his little achievement and I returned it. "Jacob?"

"Yeah?"

"How are Quil and Embry?"

"They're fine."

"What about Sam?"

"He's fine." The words came out in a half growl and I raised my brow at him. He challenged my look, daring me to continue and I was more than happy to accept that challenge.

"You know, we never did talk about what happened those days."

"I didn't think you wanted to talk about it."

"I didn't. But I do now." Jacob looked like a wounded puppy…an angered wounded puppy, but a puppy nonetheless. I sighed, toying with the checker pieces. "Let's start with the day before…that day. You were so angry and heated, Jake. And you're still angry and heated. I know that you said that Sam wasn't who I thought he was but…. I just would like some clarity on at least one thing that was going on in my life, Jake," I sighed. I didn't mean to play the poor me card, but I'd gotten really good at it lately. And it seemed to get me what I wanted. Call it selfish, but it worked most of the time.

Jacob toyed with a checker piece in his hand, flipping it casually in and out from between his fingers. Then he slowly placed it back on the board and looked up at me. "Bella, I want to tell you. I always wanted to tell you. But I already said that I was sworn to secrecy."

"Well…help me to guess it, then."

Jacob thought for a moment, then developed a small smirk. "You'll think of it instantly. Remember your first visit to La Push?"

"Yeah,"

"Remember when we talked about on the cliffs? About the legend of my people?"

I did remember, but I didn't answer. Jacob was sort of short on the subject. I do remember him talking about the Underworld films and…

Oh, come on.

"Jacob…if you're a werewolf…" I started, skepticism dripping off of my chin. Jacob pointed at me and winked.

"Bingo,"

I sat there for a moment, not really sure of what to do. Jacob was known to kid and there was no doubt that I was skeptical. But then again, I was also getting over my ex…who was a vampire. Jacob must have noticed my expression for he stood up and offered his hand. "It looks like I'll have to show you," he said with just a hint of pride. I took his hand slowly and he led me out the back door and into the woods just behind my house. We walked in silence for a bit before finally coming to what you could call a small clearing. Jacob let go of my hand and then told me to stand right there. He then started to walk away from me.

And I didn't mean to, but it brought me back to the day when Alice left. He was walking away from me just like she did. I whimpered, and he turned suddenly, running back. I wiped my eyes and he stood by me. I could feel the heat coming off of him and it made me feel better, knowing that he was there beside me. "I'm sorry," I said finally. "It's just…that looked really familiar."

He placed his hand on my shoulder. "I know. I understand. It's just," he paused to chuckle and I looked up at him. He put his thumbs in the loops of his jeans and tugged on them. "These have to come off, if I'm gonna show you. I was going to do that in private. Unless you want to see?" He wiggled his eyebrows and I shoved him away, now more than eager that he was momentarily getting out of my sight. He chuckled all the way past the trees and it stopped as soon as he disappeared. I tried looking out for him but it was to no avail. It was a cold day and I pulled my jacket tightly around me, watching the mist that developed on the dead grass. Then I heard something snap.

My head whipped up just in time to see a giant ass russet wolf coming out of the clearing. I screamed slightly before I was able to stop myself and the wolf hitched. Its eyes found mine and while I knew in my mind that this was Jacob, it was still hard to wrap my head around. I felt the bark of the tree behind me and fell against it out of fear of my legs giving. The wolf's ears lay back against his head and I heard the faint sound of a whimper. He got down on his stomach and then sort of crawled to me. If he were about ten times smaller, I would have found this cute. Now, it was just less threatening. He mad e his way all the way up to me and yet I still hadn't moved. It wasn't until I felt his cold nose on my palm that I really registered what was going on.

Then it felt like I was in the same sort of shock that I got in after the car accident at school. Emotionless, sort of void, unable to really register what was happening. My hand followed his nose and traced up his snout, over his head to scratch his ears. He made some sort of sound that told me that he liked it and I continued, my eyes pouring into his. They were Jacob's, I think. I mean, of course they were different but the way they looked at me was the same as Jacob Black's. My friend. My werewolf friend.

Shit.

"Am I the only one that doesn't have a super power of some sort?" I asked him. "Because, really, given all of this I should be able to fly or something." The wolf smiled at me, if that was possible, and raced off into the woods. I thought about trailing after him, then remembered the whole naked thing and stood firmly where I was. Jacob was attractive, yeah, but…no. My time would have been wasted anyway for almost instantly he was racing back out to me in nothing but those sweat pants again.

"Trust me, Bella; I think I can speak for the vampires you know and the werewolves that there definitely is something super powerful about you."

I opened my mouth to ask what he was talking about but he spoke first, shuffling his feet as he did so. "So, would you like to see Quil and Embry and Sam again?"

"They're, um, werepeople too?"

"Werewolves, yeah. Sam's the oldest and has been one the longest. He helps us deal with our transformations as we're still a little new to the whole thing. Do you want to meet him? I think his fiancée, Emily, is making lunch as we speak and she's a great cook. Always cooks too much." He looked fairly eager to get to La Push and since I was already stoned with shock, I nodded. His grin broadened and he led the way out of the woods and to my truck. I allowed him to drive and we weren't even out of the driveway before I managed to think of some new questions.

"So, would you mind explaining to me the details of your kind to me now? Because I read a book on it, but focused more on the 'cold ones,' and would really like some information."

Jacob chuckled and shifted gears, keeping his eyes on the road as he spoke. "Okay, so the legend goes that a long time ago there was a Quileute chief. He was a good chief and his people were prosperous. Then one day, while hunting, some members of his tribe were found murdered. They went out on a search to find this strange creature that killed with only one bite and did not devour his kill. It wasn't until nightfall that they came across one of them. He was pale white and his eyes were blood red. He looked to be out of his mind. Trying to be peaceful, the chief tried to speak to it. The creature only charged with lightning speed and strength. It killed two more of his people before the search party ran him off.

"Fearful for his people, the good chief prayed to the gods to help him get rid of these creatures. And the gods responded by turning the chief into a werewolf. With his own super strength and speed, he was able to catch the cold one and kill it and spare the rest of his people. Ever since then, those with the gene are sworn to protect La Push and surrounding areas from the cold ones. That's how legend has it that we are the way we are. The actual genetics of it are unknown."

"Thank you, Jacob. But, if you protect this area, how come the Cullens were allowed to live here?"

Jacob sighed, his grip tightening on the steering wheel. "A long time ago, my ancestors were out searching for the cold ones. We can smell them, sense them, you see. When they finally came across them, the vampires were feasting off of a dead animal, not a human. They also had yellow eyes, contrary to the red most Quileute hunters saw. Carlisle struck up a conversation with them, explained who he and his family were and told them of how they didn't eat humans." He scoffed at that and I glared but he didn't see it and continued. "Anyway, they formed a treaty of sorts. If the Cullen family promised not to breach the La Push border or kill any humans, they could stay and live in peace in Forks."

"Oh," was all I could say. I didn't want to talk about the Cullens anymore. It was starting to hurt in my chest and stomach again and lord knew I was tired of crying. However, there was no time to speak about it anymore for Jacob turned down a little road and stopped in front of a dilapidated looking house, putting the truck in park. I looked the house over noting that it needed a new coating of paint and would probably look a little better if random junk wasn't scattered around the front lawn. But who was I to judge? Jacob hopped out and I followed him as he raced up the steps and threw open the door, not bothering to knock.

"Knock knock!" he shouted, holding the door open for me. I walked in and felt the warmth of a fire hit me. It smelled like awesome inside of the house. Some kind of meat and potatoes and also some cinnamon wafted through the air. My stomach growled at all of the sensations and I blushed as a woman came into view from the hall. She was beautifully tan and had long dark hair that was pulled back into a loose ponytail.

"Thanks for knocking," she said with a smirk as she gestured for us to sit down. Jacob pushed me towards her and out of instinct I stuck out my hand.

"Emily, this is Bella Swan, the vampire girl."

"Nice to meet you," she said, sticking out her hand. As she did, the light of the fire caught her face and I could see three distinct scars travelling down the right side of her face. However, I managed to keep my eyes locked on hers.

"Nice to meet you."

"So, you're the vampire girl. Of course, I guess you're also a werewolf girl too."

"I'll just stick to you calling me Bella, if that's okay."

She laughed and motioned for me to sit. I took a chair next to Jacob and she opened the oven, the smell even more potent than before. Jacob commented on her cooking and she ignored him playfully as she basted what looked like a roast in some sort of sauce. "Could I interest either of you in some cinnamon tea while we wait on the meat and the others? I made it myself so I don't know how it'll turn out."

The both of us accepted and she grinned, placing two steaming cups in front of us. I took a sip and noticed that it was very sweet, very good. Jacob made a sound that said that he liked it as well and we both smirked at each other as the sound of pounding footsteps was heard. I turned just as the door opened, revealing two boys about Jacob's age and an older man that must have been Sam. Their eyes fell on me, then Jacob, then me, then back to Jacob before they all broke out into a grin.

What happened next was sort of blur that had to have been induced by the cinnamon tea. I was being passed around and introduced and hugged and asked loads of questions and eating and the fire was hot and dammit if I wasn't as comfortable as hell. It was all sort of fuzzy in memory now. I think it was because I was so content. And I hadn't been really content for a long time since Alice left. I was better, sure, but actually calm and happy was a new thing that I thought I'd forgotten how to be. But here I was, enjoying myself. And I had to admit that I liked it. Emily began taking the dishes from us and I stood to help, only to have her motion me to sit back down. There was a very motherly look about her and I wasn't one to disobey. I started to sit but noticed that Jacob stood and motioned for me to follow him out the door. I did so, bidding farewell to the table, who politely returned it.

The door shut behind us and I was hit with cold air for the first time in hours. I didn't realize how hot I'd gotten in there but as the air surrounded me I exhaled and opened my jacket, allowing it to waft under my shirt. Jacob watched me patiently and when I was finally cooled off, he motioned to the woods. We made it to a clearing much more quickly now and he stopped, turning around and smiling at me. "This means a lot, Bella, you knowing so much about me. I hated keeping it locked away from you."

"I like being in the loop as well. And they're great, really. I had a lot of fun today."

"That's good."

"Can I ask a personal question?"

"You already know everything about me, but sure."

"How did Emily get the…" I stopped and gestured to my face, noting how his eyes darkened. He kicked some foliage angrily and then looked up at me.

"She and Sam were having a fight. And he made the mistake of being too close to her when he transformed. Our transformations, until controlled, are brought out by anger. You may have noticed me shaking? Well, that's the first sign that I'm changing. Sam's teaching us how to control it, stabilize it, so that we don't have another Emily incident." I hadn't been looking at him so I didn't notice how close he was until I saw his feet next to mine. I looked up and noticed that he was only inches away from my face.

"Sam has to look at his mistake every day and live with it. Emily forgives him but the scars are still there. I couldn't imagine what I would do if I hurt the person I loved."

His hand reached out and brushed my hair behind my ear. From there it travelled downward and over the scar of Alice's teeth on my neck. It didn't hurt anymore physically but when he touched it I couldn't stop the tears in my eyes. I pulled away from taking a few steps to clear my head. I could feel him right behind me but as long as he wasn't touching me, I could focus better. He knew something. He had to know something. That was why he was pressing all of this. I turned around suddenly, taking Jacob by surprise.

"I need you to tell me everything you know about the day the Cullens left."


	21. Chapter 21

Return

"You were there, Bella. You know what happened."

"You know that's not true. I was blind to the whole thing. I need to know, Jake, for clarity's sake."

Jacob looked me over and groaned. He apparently didn't want to be here doing this right now. My assumptions were that he brought me to these woods for other frivolous activities but that wasn't going to happen. He should have known that by now. I reached up and placed my hand over the scar on my neck. It was therapeutic almost, feeling her there…permanently and forever. Jacob ran a hand through his hair and his eyes met mine. This was taking too long for me so I spoke again.

"Look, all that I know was that after our little escapade in my room, you cursed the Cullens and ran off. Mere hours later, Alice and the entire family are leaving me! Don't tell me you didn't have a part to play in that." I pointed a finger at him and he glared at it. Then he heaved a great breath and I watched his shoulders fall.

"I'm afraid that if I tell you, you won't speak to me again," he said softly. That was definitely a foreboding comment. And I couldn't tell him what he wanted to hear. Because I might just not want to speak to him ever again after hearing his testimony. So I merely looked at him and waited. He waited too and after a few more moments he finally started speaking, turning around so that I didn't have to see him.

"We, the pack, knew that you guys were going to the field tomorrow. Beyond the south side of the trees is Quileute territory so we scouted to make sure that it wouldn't be breached and that you would be safe. I saw the intruders. They came from the north or we would have stopped them before they reached you. However, your precious Cullens seemed to have taken care of it. Then I saw Alice leap at you and it took Quil and Embry to hold me back." He looked at me then as if he expected some sort of reaction. I didn't give him the satisfaction of one and he glowered before continuing.

"Alice leapt at you and the blonde one pulled her back. Then one of them was dragging you away. And you were protesting to go back to her. That's when I couldn't watch anymore. I left Quil and Embry to make sure you would stay safe and headed to your room to wait for you. I didn't mean to get so angry but, Bella, you have to see my side of the story!" I gave him an expectant look. Because I didn't see his side of the story. The Cullens didn't want Alice to attack me and Alice sure as hell didn't mean to attack me. Rosalie grabbing her was proof alone that they didn't want that. Otherwise they would have let her continue to ravage me.

Jacob began breathing heavily, getting angry and I found myself a tree to lean against. He came just a bit closer but stopped when he was still what I would consider a safe distance away. "I don't know what happened to make Alice jump at you but the point was that she did. And it was simple. How can you be with someone that can change like that?" He snapped his fingers violently and I flinched. He looked at me as if he'd said something profound. When it hit me that he was serious, I couldn't help but laugh out loud a bit.

"Are you serious, Jacob? If I got you mad enough I'd end up just like Emily or worse." He flinched at my words but I knew he deserved them. The realizations of his ignorance hit me wave after wave and I grew angrier with each thought. "You rag on them all the time, Jacob, but what's the difference between the two of you save for hair and body temperature? Blood to them is your rage. Hell, I'm the only one without murderous tendencies but you don't see me throwing my judgment around, do you? You're just like them!"

Jacob was in front of me in a moment, shaking violently. His fist raised and I shielded my eyes to hear him pounding at the tree behind me. It shuddered against my back with his force and I fell to my knees. Jacob hit the tree a few times more and I heard him stepping away. When I finally looked up I saw his palm reaching out to me. His eyes were pained and his breathing returned to normal so I took it and he helped me up. We stood in silence for a few moments and despite my best efforts, he couldn't look me in the eye. So I turned my eyes to the ground, letting him make the next move, whatever it was going to be.

"I'm sorry," he said finally. I looked up at him and he repeated it, stepping closer. "You…you may be right. But when I saw her attack you. And then what happened in your room. I just…I saw red. And I hated them. I still do…despite what you say."

"Why were you there? How did you know about what was going to happen in the woods?"

Jacob licked his lips and paced around in a circle for a moment. Then he ran a hand through his hair again and shrugged. "I saw that Alice had…" he gestured to my neck, "and like I said I saw red. I went to tell Sam and he got mad too and called a meeting with them. We met in a neutral zone with the head Cullen, Carlisle. Sam told him about our concerns but Carlisle cut him off, informing us that he was already leaving. He told us that Alice would speak with you and that right after they would leave. He requested one of us take you home. I volunteered."

"Did you hear what Alice and I talked about?"

"No, I stayed in your truck and had a glare-down with the blonde in the Mercedes."

That image instantly filled my head and I giggled at the thought of the two biggest glarers I knew battling it out. It was comical. "Who won?" He rolled his eyes and that gave me my answer that Rosalie had indeed won like I thought she did. I laughed and Jacob returned it slightly. "She even followed me all the way to your house."

I stopped then, eyeing him. "Wait, Rosalie followed you to my house?"

Jacob nodded. "Then she followed me up the stairs. She…well, all of them smell terrible but I thought I was gonna pass out carrying you up the stairs with those fumes. And she wouldn't leave until my dad came to pick me up. If you weren't upstairs sleeping, I think I would have kicked her ass." Jacob glowered but it seemed only reminiscent which made me feel slightly better. However, Rosalie's behavior was beyond strange. I thought about asking Jacob, but he knew far less than I did on the topic so there was no point. In fact, there was no point to dwell on her anyway, she wasn't coming back. Alice wasn't coming back. None of them were. My eyes began to burn again and I brushed them away after a soft laugh.

"Something tells me she'd give you a run for your money."

"I'm better than her," Jacob said quickly, taking me by surprise. I looked over at him and he was giving me a strange look. My instincts told me that it was not a good look but I held my ground. He came closer to me and placed his hands on my shoulders. "I'm better than all of them, Bella." Knowing this had taken a turn for the worse I opened my mouth to tell Jacob to back off. But he cut me off by placing his lips on mine.

Again, my instinct kicked in and I wrenched out of his grasp. He looked at me like he was surprised at my actions and I slapped him hard across the face. I was doing that a lot lately, it seemed, but dammit if it didn't seem necessary all of a sudden. Jacob placed his hand on his reddening cheek and looked over at me. He looked hurt and it hurt me to see him that way, but we both knew he had taken advantage. Thoughts of Alice swarmed my thoughts and I allowed the tears in my eyes to fall. "You know, for once, I'd like to be in charge of all of this shit," I muttered as I turned around. I could hear the sounds of the beach nearby and instructed Jacob not to follow me as I headed for it.

The beach was just a few minutes away and as I stepped away from the trees I took a deep breath of the humid air. It was pure and salty and relaxed me. A perfect day had been ruined by…everything. Everything that I hadn't really dealt with. I headed over to the edge of a cliff and sat down, letting my feet dangle over the waves. It looked like a storm was coming and the waves crashed angrily against any obstacles. I laid my hands on the ground and closed my eyes. Alice was gone…she wasn't coming back. And would I take her back if she did? Surely I deserved better than that, right? But Alice was the best. Jacob…Jacob would always be a friend. How could I get that through to him?

I sighed, wiping the tears from my eyes and rubbing my chest, which always seemed to ache nowadays. It was lame, but at least I wasn't moping around all of the time. I wanted some normalcy right about now. I wondered if Angela was busy tomorrow. Maybe we could catch a movie together. It seemed like a nice idea and I smiled into the misty breeze. There was that hope again. The silver lining that I always looked for never failed to catch the sun and show itself to me. If there was one trait that I liked about myself, it was that I always saw the glass half full. I could get through this. I would get through this. It wouldn't be easy, but eventually it would happen. That thought comforted me more than I thought it would but I welcomed the relief that washed over me.

Footsteps were heard behind me and my mood was instantly broken as I stood up and dusted myself off. I told Jacob not to bother me but when did anyone listen to what Bella Swan had to say? I ran through a list of the most recent times that people had actually listened to me and save for my father, I came up short on a lot of options. Still dusting myself off, I muttered, "Jacob, I told you not to follow me." The footsteps came closer and I turned around only to feel him grab my shoulders.

Fingernails pierced my skin through my jacket and I winced. I looked up into Jacob's face and it only took a moment before the flash of red told me that this was not my friend. The red headed vampire from the field was standing before me. She looked pissed and amused and that did not seem like a good sign to me. I screamed, only to have her hand slap over my mouth. It was a hard motion and my mouth stung as I felt her other arm reach behind my neck and grab my hair. She pulled it out of the way and sniffed my neck sensually. She pulled away with an emphatic exhale and rolled her eyes before finally looking at me. Being this close to her I realized that her eyes were a deep red color. The color of what would be my blood soon.

"Well, isn't it a good thing Jacob listened to you?" she said with a smirk and I felt my knees go weak.


	22. Chapter 22

Return Part II

She maneuvered me quicker than I could register and I felt her press against my back. Her arm encircled my neck and pushed just enough for me to be uncomfortable. I started to cry but didn't dare make a show. The redhead inhaled again and I could see her smile in my peripheral. "Oh, you're crying. Don't tell me you're scared. You should be used to my kind by now." She laughed and I felt something cold and wet on my cheek, lapping up my fallen tears. I tried to wrench away from her but it was like fighting against an iron bar. And she was pushing too tightly on my neck for me to speak. I felt her tongue on my other cheek, catching those tears as well and while she was distracted I caught my footing and managed to land a swift kick to her shin.

I thought my foot was broken. I really should have known better. She only laughed again and I felt her teeth against my ear. "Do you even remember my name? You probably don't. All you remember is your mate. Alice, was it? All you remember is that she saved you. But what you probably didn't think about was that your mate murdered mine!" Her grip tightened on me and it was a wonder that I could breathe at all.

"Did you think that I was going to just let that slide? That I was just going to run off to Canada and cry a bit and get over it? Hate to break it to you, sweetie, but I'm quite the vindictive bitch. However, I do have one flaw." She whirled me around and I was facing her now. I tried to scream but my voice wouldn't come. She smiled at me and ran her tongue across her vibrant teeth.

"I like to play with my food."

With that, she threw me to the ground. I tried to scream again but that function of my brain wasn't working. My body started working of its own accord, survival instinct having kicked in. I didn't want to give her the satisfaction of running away. It was futile anyway, but I was no longer in control. The other part of me definitely did not want to die and was trying very hard to prevent it. My eyes were burning with rage and fear and it was hard to see. I didn't hear the howling of a wolf and I knew that I was going to die. This was the first time I really didn't want my death. With Alice it seemed…nice. Like we'd be together forever. She wouldn't let me die. I'd just be a vampire with her and we would watch eternity together. But this? This was pretty much death.

I continued to scramble away as she watched me. Her eyes were feral and made my heart race. She must have heard it for she took a slow step towards me. I heard myself whimper and my eyes widened. Before I could really think, I had whipped my head around to the trees and screamed for Jake as loudly as I could. My voice was shrill, loud and echoed over the trees. He'd be coming now. He had to be. She was over me in an instant and I felt a pain on my shoulder. Then I was flying through the air. I tried to soften my landing but ended up slamming my back down hard on the ground. I slid for a few feet, grasping at the loose gravel. When I finally stopped, my foot was hanging over the edge of the cliff.

The redhead allowed me to make it entirely back onto land before she grabbed me again. She held my tightly in her grasp and I felt her teeth graze my neck. She pulled back suddenly and I felt her fingers caress the scar of Alice's teeth. "Well, perhaps your mate isn't who you thought she was. Is that why there's no one coming to your rescue? Did she bite and run? What a tramp. But don't worry. I plan to finish this…and then I'm gonna find her and finish her." Again I was whirled around and she pressed her forehead against mine, smiling in a way that made me want to vomit.

"My name is Victoria. And I'm going to rip your throat out and drink the screams."

Her cold hand was on my neck and I felt her nails pressing harder and harder. I closed my eyes, trying to think of something, anything to take me away from what was going to happen. Alice's image crossed my mind and I held it there with all of my might, focusing on her laughter in my ears. And then suddenly the laughter was replaced with a howl. The hand loosened for only a moment and I turned my head to see a giant russet wolf racing towards me. "Jake!" I managed to scream, though it was horse. Another wolf ran out from Jacob's left and then three more showed up. It was the whole pack, or so I thought.

Jacob growled and let out a harsh roaring sound. Victoria winced at it and I felt for the first time that maybe I wouldn't die yet. Victoria turned me around and then placed her claws on my neck. I felt them burning into my skin but not breaking it yet and Jacob charged forward. "Come on over, Rover! Get front row seats to me tearing her to shreds!" she shouted, holding me out in front of Jacob and pulling my hair back. It made me wince in pain, my head pulling back towards her and exposing my neck to Jacob, who stopped in his tracks. The other wolves started to growl and come forward and she smiled, looking me over.

"My, you've been a busy girl since your first mate left you. One, two…five dogs are coming to your rescue. Now really, there's slutty and then there's pathetic. What do you think, Fido?" She reached out to pet Jacob on the nose and he snapped, just missing her. She rolled her eyes at him, tightening her grip on me.

"Well, he's certainly no fun, is he?" she said to me as she took a few steps back. I could hear the rush of the ocean just behind us. It was cold and the wind started to blow. I began to shiver and that appeared to be the wrong thing to do. For Victoria smiled again and pulled my tightly to her.

"Did you see that, Fido? She's cold. What are you going to do about it?" Jacob snapped and she grew angrier. "Look, this is a personal matter, okay? Don't go sticking your big old nose in other people's businesses." She reached out to pet him again, tauntingly. But this time, Jacob was expecting it. She was still fast, but he managed to grab her by the wrist. She screamed and Jacob jerked his head away. Victoria's hand came with it. I screamed as Victoria lunged for Jacob. One of the other wolfs pushed her away and her grasp on me loosened. Survival mode kicked in again and I wrenched myself out of her arm and ran. However, somehow in all of that, I must have lost my direction. Before I could catch myself, I went toppling over the cliff. I heard a wolf howl and Victoria's insane cackle, and then I hit the water.

It was like hitting concrete and I groaned as water rushed over my head. I tried to swim to the surface but the waves were churning. I felt myself being pulled back and then rushed against the side of the cliff. My body was growing weak, running out of adrenaline and I didn't know where the surface was anymore. I closed my eyes in hopes of calming myself down to be able to function in the chill of the water. When I opened them, I didn't have time to brace myself for the cliff. My head slapped into it and even in the water I could hear the crack. Strange blurs of red came into view and then everything was black.

It was peaceful. Dark, but peaceful. I tried to breathe but there didn't seem to be a need. I just sat there and let the waves rock me back and forth to its strange lullaby. The cold was gone and I was very, very warm. My entire body was tingling and I felt like laughing. Was this what being high was like? I could have definitely gotten used to that, if I didn't care so much about my lungs and brain cells. But suddenly, the darkness broke and it was bright. It was too bright, like my eyelids had been ripped open. And shouts were heard and they hurt my ears. But what hurt the most was my torso. It felt like my lungs were on fire. Maybe they were. Maybe I was in hell. Then a pressure was applied and I felt the water rush up and out of my throat. A hot hand turned my face to the side and water poured it. It was like it never ended, like my mouth was the gully.

When the water ran dry my throat began to scream at me. It was painfully violent along with the dry heaves. And my head was splitting and yep, this had to be hell. "Bella, Bella!" A dark face came into view and blocked the sun from my eyes. My eyes were able to clear then and I saw Jacob. I broke into a smile and he returned it, pulling me up to embrace me. That action just about killed my head, but I couldn't help but hug him back. There were other people surrounding us but at the moment I really didn't care. I just held onto Jacob and tried make myself believe that I was actually alive. When he finally let me go I was helped to my feet by Quil and Embry. Sam smiled at me and opened a water bottle, offering it to me. I reached out to it and noticed my shaking fingers. Jacob must have noticed them too for he grabbed the bottle and held it to my lips. It burned my throat but also felt wonderful and cool. I downed half of the bottle and Jacob cupped my freezing cheeks in his hands.

"You're so lucky, Bella. Victoria went flighty again. Sam and Embry chased her all the way to the Canadian border this time but we're still going to be extra careful. There will be someone to watch your house day and night until we find that bitch." I managed to nod and he lifted his hand to my head. He touched it and I winced, jerking away from him. That hurt almost as much as his touch but I couldn't handle the former. Jacob winced along with me and sighed. "I think she needs a doctor."

Doctor?

Carlisle.

Cullen.

Alice.

No.

"No, no, no doctors," I said, trying to fight the two men that held me. But I was weak, and they were strong, and my head hurt and overall it was to no avail. Jacob pulled his infamous glare on me and I returned it.

"You need a doctor, Bella."

"I need a bed, a Band-Aid and maybe some hot tea. Please, Jake, I just want to go home."

"But your dad's not there, Bells. He's out fishing with my dad somewhere up north for the weekend. You know that."

"I don't need my father to be able to sleep in my bed. I don't want to talk anymore, Jake. My throat hurts. Please, take me home." I didn't want to be anywhere that associated me with the Cullens. I wasn't in the mood to have questions asked, to have my father panicking. None of that. I just wanted to go home and remind myself that I was alone and single…in the most non-emo way possible of course.

Thankfully, Jacob complied with my request and after the pack wrapped me tightly in blankets and placed me in the passenger seat of my truck we started for home. The blankets seemed to do nothing for my frozen temperatures and after a few minutes I resorted to falling over in my mummified state and resting on Jacob's way too hot skin. It helped a bit, but I still couldn't control the shakes. Jacob stared straight ahead, completely ignoring me and my shivering. I couldn't blame him. Only after the initial shock of everything died down did we remember what happened just minutes before Victoria showed up. He had kissed me. I had slapped him. It was a failed friendship brought back together by a pissed off redhead. Who knew how long this civility would last.

By the time he'd turned down my street I thought I was going to die. My body was just starting to warm up and it began to ache all over like cold toes in the shower. And my head had never stopped again. My breathing hurt a bit but thankfully the not talking helped my throat. As Jacob slowed to turn in my driveway, my eyes caught something in the trees to the right of my house. It was shiny, black and expensive.

It was a Cullen car.

Faster than I could have imagined I was out of those blankets and having an out of body experience as I raced up my steps and threw open the door. My head didn't hurt, my lungs were fine and I was suddenly warm inside and outside. I could hear Jacob's steps behind me and I closed my eyes, inhaling that familiar scent.


	23. Chapter 23

Aid

"Alice!" I shouted, racing towards the figure that loomed at the end of the hallway. She smelled just like I remembered and it got stronger as I neared. When I made contact with her it was like hitting a brick wall and I wouldn't have it another way. I wrapped my arms around her, my body shivering from a mix of surprise and cold. Jacob could be heard far off somewhere, panting in the doorway and I could practically feel his eyes burning holes into my back.

Then Alice stiffened. Her arms stayed firmly at her sides and I realized that my arms were wrapped around her waist. My arms should have been around her back. Her chest was pushing into mine, almost even with me but just a bit taller. I was 5'6.

This was not Alice.

My heart began to race and the figure stiffened even more, which I didn't think was possible. Slowly, I undid my grasp on her, (chest to chest, I figured out that she was indeed female) and lifted my head.

Blackened eyes stared down at me and her downturned head allowed her blonde hair to fall around her pale face like a strange sort of halo. I swallowed hard and she blinked the most intimidating slow blink I had ever witnessed. I tried taking a step back from her but my foot caught the rug I had upturned in my run. I started to stumble backwards but soon felt a cold sensation on my hand. Rosalie had grabbed my fingers in a most gentile manner. I found my balance again only to notice that Rosalie hadn't let go of my hand. In fact, she took my hand and turned it over to where my palm was facing up. I noticed a few fresh cuts from being thrown around today. For a moment I thought that they were too fresh for her to handle but she seemed completely reserved. In fact, she looked to ignore the cuts entirely as she placed two fingers to my wrist. She held it there for a moment then finally allowed my hand to drop. Her eyes shot over my shoulder to Jacob, who had since joined this strange meeting.

"What happened to her? Why is she so weak?" Rosalie demanded, definitely not in the mood for bullshit. I really hoped that Jacob could sense that. But she was also right; I was feeling really weak. Especially since she had mentioned it. My knees started to wobble and all I wanted to do was collapse. I heard him growl a bit as he stepped forward.

"What are you doing in Bella's house, leech?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes and suddenly I didn't feel the ground anymore. I lifted my head, which had somehow lolled to gawk at the floor and found that I was on the couch now. It was nice and soft and warm and I closed my eyes, listening to the conversation that carried on above me.

"I asked you a question, boy. It would do you well to answer it."

"Or what?"

I heard a strange noise. It was something like a growl but much more…Rosalie-like. Rosalie would never growl. "Look, her pulse is frighteningly low, she's pale and her hair is wet. Are you aware that it's below freezing outside? Please, what happened?" I really wanted to get up and tell her, but my body would have none of that. In fact, my brain seemed to be the only thing awake at the moment as I realized I couldn't really feel my body. That probably wasn't a good thing. Jacob heaved one of his sighs and I could picture the both of them glaring at each other, as they like to do.

"The redheaded vampire came back. She roughed Bella up on the cliff and when we showed up Bella tried to run and ending up tripping off of the edge of the cliff. But we saved her and she's fine."

"Yes, she looks fit for a marathon. Why was she alone on your territory?"

"If you must know she was distraught over your leaving. So don't act like we're the ones to blame."

"But you clearly are. Bella should not have been alone with another vampire about. We told you all of this before we left. It's a good thing I came back."

"Why did you come back? Wanted to add a little salt to her wounds? Just get out of here, okay? I'll take care of Bella."

My eyes shot open at that. Rosalie? Leave? Even if we weren't on the best of terms she was the closest link I had to Alice. No, she couldn't leave, no. Their fighting continued as I fought with my exhausted body to sit up.

"You'll take care of her, will you? You've been doing a bang-up job, really. Are you sure she really wants your help?"

"Bella always wants my help."

"The last time I checked, Jacob, she didn't want any part of you except your friendship. But you can't seem to even give her that. I saw the way you looked at us when she embraced me."

Jacob growled and right at that moment the muscles in my arm seemed to burst out some effort. I shot up and found that my head was right in between the two of them. There was a slapping sound and Rosalie allowed an evil smile to grace her lips. Jacob's eyes widened in horror and only when I turned my head to get a better look at him did I see what had just happened. Jacob's arm was extended outward and now hung limply in Rosalie's perfect palm. I swallowed hard, looking over at him. His eyes fell to the floor when I faced him. "Jake, were you about to hit her?"

Rosalie nodded as Jacob made no attempt to answer or even move. "Yes, your 'protector' seemed to lose his cool. Good thing I was here to protect you, Bella, else this muscular fist would have landed on the back of your head." His hand was released as she finished and he pulled it meekly to his side. She wasn't really talking to me. I knew this. She was talking to Jacob through me. I could see his cheeks flaming even through his dark skin and I reached out to him, placing my hand on his shoulder. He looked up at me and I smiled at him before turning to Rosalie.

"He knows what he did," was all I could work up the courage to say. I wanted Rosalie to stop but the minute her hard eyes fell on mine, it was hard to stand up to her. Now I was feeling weak physically and emotionally and in every other way I could feel weak. But it seemed that Rosalie had that effect on people because Jacob still wasn't doing much. Rosalie's eyes glided slowly over my face, studying me, judging me. I blushed, mortified, and she hitched just a bit.

"One of us has to leave, Bella. I'd like you to pick either me or him. And if it's possible, I'd like for you to choose quickly." She put her hand to her nose and sort of grimaced. I didn't think anyone smelled but apparently Rosalie thought otherwise. Jacob glared at her but did nothing more. I could tell that he was still laden with guilt. And while I didn't want him to leave, Rosalie meant Alice and there was no denying that for me. I looked at Jacob and he seemed to read my expression for he grew angry.

"Bella, you can't be serious!" he shouted, taking an angered step back.

"I'm sorry. I just…Alice…." My thought process was diminishing and the weakness was overcoming me again. I really didn't like it but it felt so good to close my eyes. Jacob made a motion to speak again but Rosalie interrupted him by somehow appearing by the front door and opening it.

"Come on, boy, she told you to leave and it would be gentlemanly of you to respect her wishes. I'm sure there's a tree in your territory that still needs marking." She smiled at him and while she looked beyond beautiful doing so, it was still pretty bitchy. Jacob looked once more at me and I lowered my eyes. He made a sort of huffing noise and I heard him trod out the door. Something was mumbled by him as he passed Rosalie and she appeared to make no response that I heard. The door shut and all was silent in the house. I tried to lift my head and when I did, Rosalie had disappeared. Just as I was about to panic, I felt a hand on my shoulder. It pulled me back down onto the couch and when I was lying on my back, her face appeared over me. Now, at this point and given my current state, it did not seem cliché at all to compare her to looking like an angel. She disappeared for a moment again and when she returned, I felt a blanket being draped over me. It was big and fluffy and warm and I nuzzled it as she tucked me in around the sides.

I opened my mouth to speak to her when she finished tucking me in but she shook her head to stop me. "You're exhausted. You need to sleep now. When is your father coming home?"

"Monday morning."

"Good. Get some sleep."

She stood to do god knows what and I realized that I couldn't allow her to go again. Alice had slipped far too easily between my fingers last time and this one was not going to get away. I made a sort of scream, though it was weakened by my throat, and lunged out to her, grasping her arm. She stiffened and looked down at me and I felt like her eyes were going to burn right through me. But they didn't and she didn't pull her arm away, though she looked like she really wanted to. After a few moments her eyebrow rose and I realized that it was my turn to speak.

"C-could you…I mean, would it be too much trouble if you just…stayed right here while I slept?" Her eyebrow then fell as her brow creased and I blushed. The darkness of Rosalie's eyes was all too clear to me now but I didn't care. She, like Alice, wouldn't hurt me. And even if she did I was beyond caring at this point. "Please, I just…every time you disappear from my sight my chest starts to ache and I remember that day in the woods. I don't know, maybe I'm in shock. But if you stayed right here with me, I'd be able to sleep and be out of your hair more quickly." I took my bottom lip in my teeth as she studied me again. Why couldn't she just answer a request or question? No, she had to look at you, really look at you before she ever did anything. It was enough to cause ulcers. After looking me over for a few more moments she finally came back to me, sitting on the coffee table across from the couch I was on.

"Thank you," I muttered, my hand travelling down her arm, not wanting to let go. She nodded and then lifted the hand that I was having trouble letting go of.

"Do you need this to be able to sleep?"

"It would help, I think. Unless you want me to wake up in a panic."

"Have you been waking up in panics?"

"Sometimes."

"For how long?"

"Since Alice left."

Rosalie made no response then but I felt her hand go limp in mine. I opened my mouth to thank her but she glared at me, motioning for me to sleep. I complied, holding her hand lazily as I adjusted myself. As soon as I was comfortable, I was out.

0-0-0-0-0

I woke up freezing. I woke up freezing and also to music. Someone was humming from far away. And I was still exhausted but the chill of my body was much more. I cradled the blanket around me but while it was warm it appeared to do no good. My teeth began to chatter as I looked around the room. Rosalie had left me but the humming from the kitchen sounded like it might have been her voice. I looked behind me and could just make out the wisps of her blond hair in the light. That relaxed me greatly and I went back to shivering as the humming in the kitchen stopped. I turned around again and saw Rosalie heading towards me with a bowl in her hand. She placed it on the coffee table in front of me then placed her chilled on my forehead. Normally, I would have jumped at the sudden change in temperature but it felt as if our skins were about even now.

She made a sort of scoff at the temperature she felt and lowered her hand, sitting on the coffee table again. "I made you some sort of soup. Would you like it?" Her voice held no real sincerity in it. It was as if she was a professional. A professional what, I didn't know, but she sounded professional. I looked to the soup and saw the familiar sight of chicken noodle. It was steaming in the bowl and the warmth called out to me. I nodded and she took it in her hands and held it to me. It was hot in my hands and that resulted in the strange tingling feeling but I welcomed it. I ate silently for a few minutes and she watched me all the while.

When I finally felt like I had had enough, I looked up at her. "I didn't know you knew how to make soup."

"Well, I don't. Neither do humans, apparently, as the directions are placed conveniently on the can."

"Oh," I whispered as I blushed. I knew that. Rosalie just had the effect on me. The effect that made me an asshole. She nodded at me and then straightened her already straight posture.

"Forgive me for letting go of your hand, but I figured if I made some kind of noise while I was away, you'd subconsciously know I was there."

"It must have worked. Thank you for doing that."

She nodded at me then looked to the clock. "You didn't get much sleep. A few hours. Is something wrong?"

"I'm freezing."

Rosalie gave me a rather blank stare, then looked to be confused as her eyes darted to the blanket that was on me. Clearly, she didn't seem to understand. And who could blame her. "I feel cold everywhere. Sometimes the blanket isn't enough. But I think a hot shower will do the trick," I said to her with a smile. She nodded hesitantly and then stood up.

"Do you need help?"

Honestly? I didn't know. I shrugged to her and unwrapped myself from the sheets and attempted to stand. That seemed to work okay. Then I tried to take a step. I fell upon my right foot and cringed in pain, throwing myself back on the couch. Rosalie kneeled to the floor and picked up my foot, gently sliding my pant leg up. The ankle was swollen and bruised, as was the top of my foot. That must have been the one I used to kick Victoria with. Just how much was my adrenaline raging last night that I didn't feel it? Rosalie gave a contemplative hum before standing and offering me her arm. I took it and felt myself being lifted. The woman was carrying me up the stairs. This would have been comical if I wasn't so scared of laughing in her presence. We reached the top of the stairs and I pointed to the left and Rosalie carried me into the bathroom.

She sat me down on the toilet and got the water going, pulling up her sleeves to test the water. When she got it to where she thought it was appropriate, she looked over at me. I hopped over next to her and reached into the tub. It was nice. It could probably be a smidge hotter but I could adjust that when she left. Rosalie stood and then reached out to flip the faucet and turn the bath into a shower and as she reached out, I noticed her exposed arms.

They were littered with little silver scars. And they were all over the front of both of her arms. I swallowed hard, unable to tear my eyes away from them. Rosalie must have noticed for her sleeves were pulled down in half a second. I gulped and looked up at her. She was glaring down at me and I looked away. "Where did those come from?" I dared. Rosalie sighed and headed towards the door. For a moment I thought she was going to ignore my question but as she went out the door and started to close it behind her, I heard her mutter something.

"Alice,"

The door shut behind me and I felt even number than before. That day came washing back over me. Alice's teeth on my neck, the feeling of leaving her, watching her struggle in Rosalie's arms. It was like I was living it all over again. Tears started to fall down my cheeks as I wrenched off my clothes and eased my way into the shower. Standing on my good leg, I accepted the warm needles that entered my adjusting skin. It temporarily shut my mind off as my body struggled to retain the heat that was pouring over it. I reached down and turned the heat up a little, smiling as everything seemed to fog around me. After awhile, it didn't sting anymore, and I started to feel like my old self. And with this old self, returned my logical brain

Rosalie was downstairs. What the hell was she doing here? Surely she must have known where Alice was, but why would she come instead of Alice. Maybe this wasn't about Alice at all. But if it wasn't about her, then what could it be about? Now that I was coherent, it was definitely time for some answers. I finished washing and hopped to my room to put on some fresh clothes. Given my recent state, I chose overly warm clothes and ran a brush through my hair. From there I hobbled to my door. Before I could even open it all the way, Rosalie was at the top of the stairs. She extended her arm again and I took it and in no time we were at the bottom of the stairs. She let me go then and allowed me to make my own way to the couch. I sat down in the same spot that I'd slept in and Rosalie took a seat on the same couch, but a cushion apart. Looking at her now, I noticed that her eyes were a much brighter shade. She must have gone hunting while I was showering. Nice of her.

"So, what's your first question?" she said suddenly, brining me out of my daze of staring at her face. She was looking intently but openly at me and I sighed with relief at the fact that this didn't seem like it was going to be too hard. Maybe Rosalie wouldn't be so difficult after all.

"Why are you here?"

"Why do you think?"

Damn it.


	24. Chapter 24

Q & A

"Is Alice okay?" I decided to counter with another question, hoping she would sense that I wasn't in the mood for these games. Rosalie looked me over and I watched as one of her hands ran itself slowly up her covered arm.

"As far as it goes,"

"What does that mean, Rosalie?" My voice squeaked out her name as I started to shiver. I didn't want to think of Alice in any way other than 'fine' or a synonym of the word. Normally, crying in front of Rosalie was one big no-no, but I couldn't seem to stop them. I didn't even know what was causing them as they started to trail down my cheeks. Fear and concern and what? Patheticness? Was that a word? Well, screw it. It fit, so I was going to use it.

Rosalie threw her eyes to the ceiling in annoyance, letting out a slow exhale. I glared at her but she either didn't notice or didn't point it out. When she looked back at me, her eyes were holding a strange look. It was one that I couldn't place but she looked away before I could really focus on it. "May I ask you a question?" she said finally. I shrugged, not really understanding her words and focusing more on Alice. She glared at me, which woke me from my thoughts. "Was that a 'yes?'"

"Yes. Yes you may ask me a question," I clarified tiredly.

Rosalie nodded, pleased with herself that she got a better answer out of me and I sighed. She brushed her hair off of her shoulders and leaned in just a bit, though she was still a ways away. "What exactly did you and Edward talk about after he dropped you off that day?"

I was quiet for a moment as I tried to remember. I remembered the parts with Alice quite clearly but everything after? Slowly I relived the second worst day of my life and finally came across the part where Edward had dropped me off. "He said that he needed to be with his family," I repeated, putting emphasis on the same word that Edward had. Rosalie gave a contemplative nod.

"And then Jacob visited, yes? What did you talk about?"

"He told me I shouldn't have gone with Alice, we tried to make peace, he saw these," I pulled my hair back and watched her eyes briefly gloss over my bite mark, "he got angry and then he left."

"What did you say about Alice, about my family?" she asked and I couldn't help but smile a bit. There was no emphasis on the 'my' when Rosalie said it and as lame as it may have been, I accepted that as a little bit of hope.

"Jake started talking trash about you, I told him I didn't want to hear it, that the Cullens were my friends and not his and that he had to right to say anything about Alice. Why?"

Rosalie's eyes darkened as she sat up and straightened her posture. She folded her hands across her lap and watched them for a moment before she lifted her head and found my eyes again. "Because that's not what I—what we heard."

"From who?"

"Edward,"

I couldn't really help the gasp that I let out. Rosalie seemed to be expecting it, for she didn't move at all. My mind suddenly grew into a flurry as I tried to imagine just what Edward had said to all of them. And how could Alice have believed him? It just didn't seem like her. Sensing my silence, Rosalie continued on.

"When Edward returned from dropping you off, Alice was a nervous wreck. She was inconsolable and weak and positively guilt ridden. Then my dearest brother shows up and informs her that he could hear yours and Jacob's conversation in Jacob's mind and decided to stick around. He told Alice that you had mentioned being afraid of her, and unsure about you wanting to continue your relationship with her. Needless to say, Alice didn't take it well.

"She ran from Esme's arms, almost knocking me over as she passed." Rosalie stopped then and just barely smiled. "Of course, being Alice, she did turn around to make sure I was okay." I couldn't help but smile at that either as Rosalie continued.

"But Alice ran to her room, and the…well, sounds of anguish could be heard. After an hour or so, Edward finally decided to talk to her. He asked us all to leave so that there would be no distractions and so that Alice would be more comfortable with him. When we returned, Alice was out of her room, still disconsolate, but now determined. We had to leave. She couldn't risk your life again and with all of the vampires in the territory gone and with a wolf taking a protective interest in you, it was best to leave. So we did."

I looked away from her then, sniffling and trying desperately to keep my tears from falling. I was surprised I had any left, truth be told. My hands started shaking with rage at the thought of Edward. What had he told her in private? What other lies was he feeding her? Rosalie sat patiently, diverting her eyes and waiting for me to make the next response. I took one more deep breath, feeling how staccato it was, but managed to find my words.

"Why…what about my actions in the woods? I mean, surely that was enough to tell her that Edward was lying."

Rosalie shook her head in a more pristine form of 'I don't know.' "The decision was made. She seemed dead set in keeping up the plan. She and Edward also have a strange sort of telepathy with each other. He could have been feeding her more lies in the woods for all I know. Alice was vulnerable, and Edward took advantage of that."

"Why? What have I done to Edward?"

"You rejected him." Rosalie's answer was quick and filled with a heavy tone. I noticed that her hands gripped each other when she said it. There was something behind those words.

"What's wrong, Rosalie?" I asked, scooting into the center couch cushion so that we were closer. She appeared to be hesitant at my move but made no effort to shove me back. I watched her eyes as they scanned mine. So beautiful and so positively angry. Perhaps even a little sad, too? Finally, after a moment, she exhaled and spoke airily.

"No one rejects Edward," she began "but Edward can reject all." She looked me hard in the eyes and I connected the dots.

"Edward rejected you?" I asked quietly, hoping I was right. Rosalie gave a single nod.

"Not that I wanted him in the first place, but rejection, for someone like me, is quite offensive to come by." She waved her hand to her face, her lovely face, and I nodded in understanding.

"Well, safe to say he's an idiot. Plus, you have Emmett and he has no one, right?" I added, hoping to lighten the situation. Rosalie's face did brighten just a bit at the mentioning of her husband but it disappeared quickly. But my thoughts were already elsewhere. They had been elsewhere this entire time. They had been on Edward, and Alice and the Cullens in general. Rosalie seemed pretty informed on the matter and, yes, she was here. But why now? Why wait a month? Why wait at all? Why didn't she confront Edward on all of this?

"Rosalie, why didn't you challenge Edward before you all left?"

"Who was I to challenge my brother? Besides, until tonight I wasn't sure if he was lying or not. None of us knew. And Alice is a big girl, with her own logic and reasoning. It would seem that it failed her this time, but I think she'll have learned her lesson."

"Is Alice going to come back?"

"Are you hungry? Thirsty?"

"Rosalie…"

Rosalie glared at me then brushed the hair off of her shoulders again. "Alice has put herself in a strange state. I don't know what's going to become of it."

"What is it? Please, tell me."

The blonde huffed, irritated that she wasn't leading this conversation, but continued to speak. "When we left, we left for Russia. We've been there for the past month in a town located a few miles above Norilsk the largest northernmost city. The minute we arrived, Alice found herself a spot, sat down, and waited. She waited for visions of you. There were times when she would smile with her eyes still glazed over and there were times when she would look like she was about to cry. Then something happened, and she couldn't see as much of you anymore.

"Alice took that as a sign that you were slipping away from her. She tried to accept it, but ended up searching harder. As of now she's in a strange sort of catatonia. No one can wake her. She just sits and stares. She hasn't even fed in weeks." She looked as if she was about to say something else, but then stopped herself. I slowly digested Rosalie's words, running over them and over them in my mind. Alice was safe, but catatonic. The Cullens were in Russia in the largest northernmost and probably coldest town ever. Alice had everything wrong and the only ones who knew what was right were sitting in my living room.

I stood quickly, balancing on my good leg and Rosalie stood as well, surprise evident on her face. She held her arm out, should I need it to balance, but I was doing well so far. "We have to go to Russia, Rosalie. We have to tell Alice. She should be here with me right now! All of you should. This is crazy! Will you help me up the stairs? I've got to pack." I started to hobble towards the staircase, only to feel that familiar hand on my arm. I turned around to face Rosalie who for once didn't look so angry.

"You cannot go to where Alice is," she said softly.

"Why not?"

"They'll kill you. They'll kill all of us."

"Who?"

"The Sangvinicheski Regentoi,"

"Huh?" Rosalie totally just spoke another language, one that I knew I would never learn. She rolled her 'r' sound and the last little thing sounded like 'regent' except with a hard 'g' sound. I waited for her to explain and or translate, but she only flashed me a quizzical look.

"Alice never mentioned the Sangvinicheski Regentoi?"

"I…guess not. What is that?"

Rosalie gently tugged on my arm, gesturing to the couch again. I tugged back but her grip, as well as her look, remained firm. Heaving a great sigh so that she knew how displeased I was, I sat back down. Rosalie also sat, seemingly relieved that I wasn't balancing on one foot anymore. "The Sangvinicheski Regentoi—Sanguine Regents, if you didn't catch that- are the leaders of the vampires, so to speak. They've been around longer than any of us, thousands of years, and have deemed themselves the supreme authority. The town that we're staying in has no real name. We call it 'Sangvine' merely to give it a name. The town's only inhabitants are vampires."

She paused for a moment, reading my expression, then continued on. "Only vampires live in Sangvine because they are the only ones who could tolerate the cold winters. No human would dare travel to where it's located and if they did, they would promptly be killed by the Regentoi. No human is allowed because the Sangvinicheski Regentoi forbade it so. Allowing a human to witness us without killing them is grounds for murder. Just about everything you do wrongly are grounds for murder. You cannot kill your own kind, you cannot consort with humans, you must keep the vampire world a secret. You see, my family and I are already on death row, for you." She pointed a long finger at me and I swallowed nervously. However, Rosalie cast her hand away and shook her head at me.

"There's no cause for worry, as they know nothing about you. However, if you were to, say, run into Sangvine where you would instantly be detected, you, along with all of us, would be slaughtered at the hands of the Regentoi. They take pride in their lack of mercy. If you wish, I can go and explain all of this to Alice. Though I don't know if it will wake her up."

"That's why I have to go, Rosalie! If Alice could…sense me or something, she might wake up. You have to take me with you!"

"What part of 'slaughter' did you not understand?" Rosalie demanded, standing up and flinging her arm outward. "If we were to go, you wouldn't even make it out of the car before they caught a whiff of that scent of yours. It's ridiculous, Bella! Do you ever think things through?" She was fuming now and I watched as she paced around the room. It was scary when she lost her temper like that. But I knew it would die down soon.

"What if we just bundled me up in thick winter clothes? I'm pale, Rosalie. Maybe in a tinted car I could pass for one of you. Surely there's a way to do this!" Rosalie's eyes met mine and I heard a slight crack as she clenched her jaw and held it there.

"I will not risk my life for you," she said through her teeth.

"You already have, Rosalie. Why are you here? Did you ever answer that question? Why are you, of all people, here in my living room? Does anyone even know you're here?"

Rosalie looked away angrily, shaking her head, and I couldn't help but smile a little. I was winning this argument. I would go and see Alice. Everything would be okay. It just had to be. Rosalie looked to have calmed down and I softened my tone as I repeated the question. "Why are you here, Rosalie?"

"Because my family is suffering," she said just as quietly as she sat back down. "My family is suffering and it's because of you. Alice was always our little beacon of hope. It was probably wrong of us to rely on her as much as we did but now that she's gone, I've found that I have no hope anymore. There is no Alice in my life and I just can't settle for that. If you're a part of Alice, if you're what completes her, brings her back, then you're family to me."

She looked up at me and while I could tell she was regretting speaking so easily, a part of her seemed relieved that I knew. It sort of hit me then. And when it hit me I realized that it should have hit me sooner, but it didn't. Rosalie cared for me. Not out of necessity, though it may have started out that way, but because I was family. Rosalie cared for me. And as I looked her over now, I knew that I cared for her too.

In a moment of some kind of overwhelming feeling, I reached out for her. My arms found their way across the back of her neck and I held her tightly. Rosalie hitched again, but not as much as before and I smiled as my arms moved across her back, hugging her again. Just as I was about to let go, I felt her hands on my back. They were very light and if this had been anyone else I would have thought that they were faking this hug. But this was just simple, unsure Rosalie, hugging me back. When I finally let go her hands fell quickly to her sides. She looked hard into my eyes and I tried as best as I could to return that look. Her breaths rose and fell easily and I could practically see her mind ticking away underneath that blonde hair.

Finally, she let out a large sigh and shook her head. "Am I to assume that you have a passport?" she questioned as she stood up and pulled out her cell phone. It just so happened that I did have a passport for when my mother and Phil and I vacationed in Costa Rica one summer and I nodded at her. She seemed just a bit impressed as she dialed the number. Someone answered after a few moments and she smiled, making her voice cheerful for whoever was on the other end of the line.

"Hello, I was wondering when your next flight to Norilsk, Russia was? What about Moscow? May I purchase tickets over the phone? Great," she smiled into the receiver then looked down at me. I couldn't help the fact that I was beaming but she didn't seem to appreciate it much for she jerked her head to the stairs. Oh, right…packing. I hobbled past her, shaking my head when she offered to help. "Pack only a few outfits, but make them as warm as you can," she called as I reached the stairs. I nodded and gently made my way up the steps, putting slight pressure on my hurt foot as I did so.

I finally made it up the stairs and pulled out one of my suitcases. Then I searched my closet and found that I had only two wool sweaters. Good enough. I also had one pair of ski pants and the others were jeans. Good enough. I packed them quickly, then went to grab my toiletries. As I headed back into my room, I found that Rosalie was in there, looking over what I'd packed. "You're sure this is the warmest you have?" she asked, gesturing to the suitcase. I nodded and she looked warily at me for a moment before shaking her head, grabbing my back of toiletries and stuffing it in, zipping up the sides. "We'll just have to go shopping in the Domodedovo terminal. There were no flights from here to Norilsk, so I'm just going to find one when we get there. Do you have your passport?" I nodded, holding it up along with my driver's license. She nodded at me, then picked up my bag.

"What about your father?"

"I'll write him a note."

"He's not going to be happy."

I nodded again, thinking of Charlie. I loved him, and I didn't want to hurt him. But this was something that I just had to do. He would get over it, I'm sure. He loved me after all. Rosalie shrugged, indifferent towards family matters that didn't concern her and walked past me with the suitcase, heading downstairs. I looked around my room, checking to see if I needed anything else before grabbing my ski jacket and heading out the door where Rosalie had the car waiting.


	25. Chapter 25

Heat

Rosalie had purchased first class tickets. It made sense that someone like her would always travel as easily as possible. But I had never flown first class before and I really couldn't believe that the seats reclined all of the way back and didn't bother the person behind me. But since this was a strange flight, no one was behind me anyway. In fact, there were only three other people in first class with us. Rosalie ignored me as I toyed with all of the buttons and free stuff I was given when the plane took off. Occasionally she would give me the 'stop looking so bourgeois' look but I could only smile in return. She was taking me to Alice. I was going to see Alice again and I was certain that she would come back with me. Once I had grown bored with the gadgets, I fell asleep. It was a red eye flight after all. When I woke up, I found that Rosalie was in the same position she had been in the entire time. This time, though, her eyes were closed. Pretending to sleep, maybe? I glanced at my watch. It was about ten a.m. our time.

"Rosalie?" I whispered to her. Her eyes shot open and she turned her head to the right to face me, quirking a brow.

"If it's ten in the morning our time, what time is it in Moscow?"

"Nine in the evening."

"Of the same day?"

"Yes,"

"How much longer is the flight?"

"We're due to land at 3 in the morning, Moscow time."

I sighed, thanking her, to which she responded with a nod. I opened the window a crack and glanced outside. It was growing dark, but I could still see the ocean beneath us. I bet it was freezing and I momentarily shivered at the thought of being submerged in it. "Ah, the joys of feeling cold," Rosalie commented. I turned to her and noticed that she was watching me. She must have seen me shiver. I nodded awkwardly.

"You don't feel cold?"

"No, though we can feel heat. Disgusting feeling."

"What about another vampire? What do they feel like to you, temperature wise?"

"The same another human feels to you. Completely normal."

I nodded and studied her face for a moment. It really was something to behold. Alice was beautiful, yes, just as beautiful as Rosalie in my opinion. But Rosalie was…there was no point in describing her because you'd just have to see her to understand. So I decided to let it drop as best as I could and focus on the tactic at hand. Allotting time for customs, we had a small layover in Moscow where Rosalie hoped to get me more efficient clothes. From Moscow we would fly to Norilsk on a small commercial liner and in Norilsk Rosalie had a car waiting for us. From there it would be about a two hour drive to Sangvine. If all went according to plan we would arrive in Sangvine, undetected, in the morning.

Then came the dangerous part: Sneaking me through Sangvine aka Vampire Village. Rosalie had closed her eyes again and I brought my arm up to my nose. I pulled the sleeve back and placed my skin directly on my nose, inhaling deeply. The faintest smell of the soap I use in the shower…and nothing else. I smelled like Dove. Hardly the cause for a vampire losing their cool. Of course, I knew that it was the blood pumping beneath this skin that was the real cause of all of this trouble. Stupid blood.

"Everything would just be easier if I was a vampire," I said dramatically, resting my head against my chair. Rosalie shot up then, glaring at me so intensely that I jumped when I saw it. She looked me over for a moment, as if she were calculating my words in her mind. Then she shook her head slowly at me, as if I was a small child.

"No, things would not be easier," she said slowly.

"But the thing that has been causing all of this trouble is this!" I threw my wrist in her face and she jumped back, giving a quiet hiss. I lifted my head and looked at the other passengers. All three of them looked to be asleep. Thank God.

"You really are something," Rosalie said in shock. "I could have ripped your wrist in half just then. Do you realize that?"

"I trust you, Rosalie. Just like I trust all of the Cullens. Except perhaps Edward now. But honestly, you're super strong and super fast and super gorgeous and you get to live forever. What's so bad about that?"

Rosalie shook her head slowly and looked at me disappointedly. I gulped, feeling guilty and not even knowing why. Rosalie looked so sad as she sat back in her chair and looked straight ahead. "There is so much more to us than superhuman. A lot of what we are is in fact subhuman. You will never understand the tortures we have to face daily and you should be thankful for that."

"Like what?"

Rosalie turned her head to me and shrugged. "Every move we make around you, any human, is stinted. When I do this," she reached out and cupped my cheek in her hand, "You cannot possibly understand how gentle I am right now. One misplaced tap of my finger," I felt her fingers drum along my skin just as tenderly as her touch, "would result in a broken jaw if not more severe damage. And that doesn't even include how you smell.

"The blood flowing beneath your skin isn't necessary. We are immortal, after all. But it keeps us healthy looking in the long run. But blood smells the equivalent of water's vitality." She looked to me again to make sure I understood and I nodded. However, she only scoffed in return. "You cannot possibly understand how much it burns to be in your presence."

"Burns?"

"The scent of your blood, especially, is like inhaling smoke, but more intense. But the smoke smells so good, you tease yourself and allow the burn." She absently ran her long fingers down the column of her throat and I watched her do so for a moment before looking away. Everything Rosalie did was beautiful, sensual, and it made me feel uncomfortable watching her. Like I was a voyeur or something. "There's also that," Rosalie said, breaking me from my thoughts. I looked into her eyes and noticed that she was staring at me, possibly amused.

"There's also what?"

"The fact that we're so alluring to you humans. You can hardly stay away from us as we can you."

I blushed, lowering my head. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault." She looked to be sincere when she said it and I smiled at her, more than surprised that she returned it…but just a little bit. "But," she continued, "back to my point, your humanity is so much more worthwhile than this." She drifted her hand casually along her torso and then flung it away as if she was a piece of garbage. I didn't like that but I didn't really know how to address it, so I let it go.

"So, everyone in Sangvine thrives on human blood?"

"Everyone in Sangvine survives on whatever they can get. As you could guess, there are not many people in Siberia. When unbelievably cold storms hit, the Sangvinicheski Regentoi send out hunters to collect people from the nearest towns. It's easier for the townsfolk to assume they were caught in the storm and froze that way. They are brought back alive and most are consumed by the Regentoi themselves. What is not consumed is released into the town and then it's first come first serve."

"That's terrible!"

"It's very Russian. But let's not talk politics. So, if a Sangvine vampire were to come across anything that still produced blood, they would probably drink it. Which makes our predicament all the more ridiculous…not to mention suicidal."

"Well, it's not like we can turn back now."

"Very true." Rosalie shook her head at me but her eyes never left mine. "Alice always talked about how you were something else. I could see why now."

"I'm going to take that as a compliment."

"As you should. Now, it would be best if you tried to get a bit more sleep." With that, she reached up and turned my little light off. Then she reached over me and held down the button that reclined my seat. I glared at her as I relaxed with my chair but as soon as my head hit the pillow, I was out again.

"Domodedovo,"

"Domedomomo,"

"Domo…ded…ovo,"

"Domonednovo,"

"Where did you hear an 'n'?"

"I don't know, Rosalie, languages aren't my forte."

"Wonderful, you know Italian but can't repeat a word. You know, two year olds can do this." Rosalie sighed and ran a hand through her hair. The plane was about forty five minutes from landing. It was dark outside and I adjusted my watch to what the flight attendant had stated as Russian time. She figured it would be good if I knew a few words in Russian but so far, I couldn't even name the airport. It wasn't my fault it was long and weird. Rosalie sighed again. "Fine, we'll learn something else. Thankfully for you, the Russians are culturally closemouthed, unlike Americans."

"Are you Russian?"

"No, I'm from New York."

"The Russia of the United States."

Rosalie shot me a look to tell me she didn't understand I told her to never mind. She shrugged it off and then taught me the word for thank you, excuse me, and a word that could mean almost whatever I wanted it to. She also told me how to say that I was American and didn't speak Russian. I repeated them over and over in my head, mouthing them as I did so just in case I'd have to use it. "Do you speak fluent Russian?"

"Yes,"

"That's impressive,"

"You've got nothing but eternity, might as well learn a language or two to pass the time." She shrugged as if it was nothing and looked away for a moment. When she looked back at me, she proceeded to inform me on a few Russian customs.

When the plane finally landed it was still dark out, unsurprisingly. However, I could make out the wind, which was blowing rather violently and see the white snow that was caked on the ground. It looked…cold. I grabbed for my ski jacket and put it on, looking over at Rosalie. She was in a thin long sleeved shirt, with one of those down vests on top of it. She was wearing super tight jeans and those big Eskimo looking boots. They were called Uglies or something. I thought it was a rather fitting name, but Rosalie, as with everything, managed to pull the boots off.

Rosalie not having any luggage and mine just being a carryon, we were one of the first off the flight. The airport looked like an airport, but an old airport. It worried me a bit but with Rosalie next to me there was really nothing to fear. Rosalie vs. a Russian? I'd put my money on Rosalie. When we headed out of the gateway into the terminal, my arm instinctively looped through Rosalie's. I didn't know if it was culture shock or if the reality of our situation had gotten to me but I was suddenly very, very intimidated.

Everything was in a different language and the terminal was huge. It was huge and broad and really hot and while there weren't many people, everyone was staring at me. Okay, so they were probably all staring at Rosalie and the other girl that was clinging to her arm like a moron. But either way, I was out of my comfort zone. Rosalie seemed to understand that for she allowed me to hang onto her arm, despite the heat. With all of the people it was also humid. Honestly, it had to have been 80 degrees in there, but Rosalie and I seemed to be the only ones who noticed. She quickly pulled me into a clothing store. I couldn't read the sign but it appeared to sell sport-like clothes. I let go of her arm when we went in so that I could take my jacket off. It was stifling in this place. Of course, it was probably below freezing outside but still…. I pulled my jacket off and rolled my sleeves up, looking to Rosalie. She had done the same with her vest and rolled up her sleeves. She looked uneasy and I offered to take her vest. She shook her head and proceeded to the racks of jackets.

"We need to make this really quick," she whispered, throwing a jacket my way. I threw it on and it fit. When I told her so she grabbed one more then asked for my jean size. I gave it to her and she flitted through the racks at vampire speed. I looked around as she did so, noting that thankfully no one was paying us any mind. Finding two pairs of what looked like warm pants, she stood up and handed all of the clothes to me. Then she dug in her pocket and pulled out an American Express card. Her fingers brushed mine as she handed it to me and I felt something wet on them. I looked to my fingers and then to Rosalie who was looking very, very worried. "You need to finish this. I have to go. I'll be in that bathroom." She pointed and I followed her finger. When I saw the bathroom I turned back around and found that she was already gone. Panic came over me again but I didn't let it show as I made my way up to the counter.

I smiled at the woman and she didn't return it as she rang up the clothes. She must have known that I was American for when she told me the amount it was in English and in US currency. I handed her the card and she looked for a moment. She opened her mouth to say something but decided against it, shrugging me off as another American, I assumed. The card was swiped and I signed Rosalie's name on the electronic pad. "Spicy-ba," I said to her as she gave me the bag. She looked at me for a moment, then seemed pleased.

"Pazhalooysta," she answered. I smiled at her, immensely proud of my Russian skills, and darted for the bathroom. Rosalie had taken my carryon so I just had the bags as I headed for the door. It opened and I ran in, looking for her. It was even hotter in this bathroom and I was starting to sweat. I didn't see her. In fact, the bathroom looked empty with the exception of one woman who was drying her hands. As casually as I could I looked under the stalls. I made out Rosalie's boots in a far stall. The woman moved past me and as the door behind me opened, Rosalie shouted at me to lock the door behind me. I lunged for the door and locked the deadbolt into place.

"Is there anyone else in here?" Rosalie asked. I got down on my knees and examined the stalls more thoroughly.

"Just us, Rosalie."

The stall opened and Rosalie stepped out. Her head was kept down, her hair blocking my view of her. I watched as she headed over to a window made entirely of privacy glass. In an instant her hand was through the window, the glass shattering around her. I jumped and watched as she broke the entire window out, letting the Russian wind rush through. It was freezing and I could see flecks of snow falling in. For a moment it felt good in the heated bathroom but soon I was cold and I pulled my jacket on again. That helped a lot and as I zipped up the zipper I looked to Rosalie, only to gasp.

She had taken off all of her clothes with the exception of her underwear and was now standing in front of the window with her back to me. The wind was rushing in, blowing her hair behind her in waves but she stood solid against it, allowing the cold to hit her dead on. It was silent as she stood there with the exception of the howling wind. I couldn't think of what to say. There didn't seem to be much to say. The bathroom was large and she was about fifteen feet away from me as she stood there. Someone knocked on the door and she made no response to it. "Hello?" Thank god they were English.

"Maintenance!" I shouted back. The woman made no response and it was safe to assume that she left. Rosalie still had not moved and I was growing cold. I stood up, taking a deep breath, and headed over to her. When I was halfway there I noticed that her skin was…sagging. It was, it looked like cellulite but it was all over her body, which was starting to droop and turn a strange color of yellow. I took another step closer and Rosalie hitched. Her head turned to the side but I still couldn't see her face.

"You don't want to come any closer," she urged. I stopped for a moment but took another step. She took a deep breath and lowered her head. "Don't come any closer!" she shouted.

I stopped then, not daring to move one inch closer. Rosalie didn't say anything else but turned to face the wind again. After about five minutes she spoke again. "You should go shopping. You'll want to get some food and water for yourself because Sangvine won't have any."

"I don't want to leave you here alone."

"What can you possibly do for me right now?" she was angry now. I could hear it, but it didn't deter me as much as it would have before this trip. She was so much more open on the plane…what happened? Was something this simple going to bring us back to square one? I couldn't let that happen.

"I can…be here for you, Rosalie."

"How? Are you going to tell me how you understand? 'Yes, Rosalie, the feeling of flesh rotting off your body does indeed suck. Does yours turn yellow too?'" She mocked my voice all too well and I blushed. I didn't mean like that…but how could I explain it to her? I looked at her skin again and in the chill of the bathroom it did look to be tightening up again. It still had that strange yellow haze but improvement was happening.

"Alice said that heat didn't bother you guys as much as she thought," I murmured, staring at the curves of her waist. Rosalie scoffed and I watched her hair sway as she shook her head.

"Alice has a way of downplaying things. After her little lunches with you she would always have to come home and ice herself down."

"Why would she do that?"

"I guess touching you was worth it." Rosalie gave a long, sad sigh and lowered her head. "Do you still want to be a vampire?" She turned around then to expose her back to the cold and I gasped as her face appeared to me.

The skin around Rosalie's face had fallen. It looked like wet tissue paper and just as frail. The yellow look was prominent in her cheeks but just around her chin and eyes there was a disgusting green color. Her whole body was glistening, wet with something and as it ran off of her body it looked like it was taking pieces of skin with it, it was happening so quickly. The wind blew fiercely in and I was hit with Rosalie's scent. It smelled of rotting flowers. It smelled of rot in general. She was still beautiful, because Rosalie couldn't not be beautiful. But it was hard for me to look at her right now. Not because of the way she looked, but because of how sad she was. The most beautiful woman in the world was rotting. And while the chill was slowly reverting her body back to normal, it was still flawed.

She looked at me but couldn't hold my glance for too long. I took a few more steps forward, her stench becoming stronger. She closed her eyes as I neared, that infamous proud glare overtaking her features. My hand was chilled to the bone, so I took the risk of reaching out and touching her cheek. She winced, but upon feeling the temperature of it, relaxing, exhaling and opening her eyes. I smiled at her, in awe at the feeling of her skin tightening beneath my palm. "You are so beautiful," I whispered to her. She closed her eyes and pushed against my hand. I didn't know that someone like Rosalie would need to hear someone say that to her and mean it, but I could tell she was grateful for my words. We stood there in the cold until Rosalie had returned to her normal self. When she felt that she was okay, she checked her watch and nodded, pulling her clothes back on.

"We still have about five minutes. We need to get you food."

I nodded and she pulled on her final boot, looking over at me. She opened her mouth to say something, looked me over, then let whatever she was going to say go. I didn't push her on the subject and opened the door. A security officer was standing in front of the door. He grunted in Russian at me and I squeaked a little. In an instant Rosalie was in front of me. She smiled at the guard and responded it what sounded to me like fluent Russian. He grinned at her and as she spoke, she waved me on from behind her back. I managed to sneak past the officer and ran to the nearest food store. I piled up a whole bag of food and grabbed a few water bottles and by the time I made it to the right gate, Rosalie was waiting for me with the bags. We were the last to get on the plane, but we were on the plane. And we were going to see Alice.


	26. Chapter 26

Tell Me

The flight to Norilsk was relatively short compared to the flight to Russia. It wasn't surprising. I slept the entire way, which apparently was a good idea because by the time we landed it was early morning. That meant I wouldn't have to worry about adjusting to the time change. Rosalie made no real attempt to speak to me as we de-boarded once more in the tiny Norilsk airport. Customs wasn't necessary this time and Rosalie carried the carryon bag of mine as I shivered in my clothes. The wind was blowing terribly and the morning had a strange orange glow, like a jack-o-lantern candle against a porch. It looked strangely against the ice covered walkway and I stayed close to my guardian. The wind dried out my face almost instantly and I felt like it was cracking. So I kept my head down, focusing on my feet that were struggling in the ice. I lost my footing twice in four steps and she sighed heavily, extending her arm to me. I gripped it happily and stuck close to her. She didn't seem to mind and for that I was grateful. With her help I only stumbled once more. It didn't even throw the vampire off balance but as I looked up at her, thoroughly embarrassed, I could have sworn that she was smiling just a bit. However, in the dim light I couldn't be too sure.

On the way off the runway, I noticed that we had gotten in some kind of line. We were in a line, outside…in Siberia. This place was nuts. I shivered as we waited but the line moved rather quickly as there were few people on the flight. When we neared the end of the line I noticed two Russian officials with flashlights. Their coats were big and black and heavy and I found that I was immensely jealous of them. However the closer I got the more I noticed just how red their cheeks were in the light. Perhaps they were just as miserable as I was. In that case, it was perfectly okay with me for them to be in a sour mood. Lord knew that I was. They were looking at everyone's papers, be it passports or licenses or something. The gaurds looked to be annoyed at everyone, but polite, as far as it went. The flashlights were turned on my face and I winced. Apparently, we were next. Rosalie handed an official her papers and what happened next was a series of long Russian words by him.

He sounded like he was angry but Rosalie appeared unfazed. She waited until he had finished ranting to her before she pulled out another piece of paper and showed it to him, explaining something. She sounded just as angry but appeared to be making a good point. The other official looked at the papers and they looked back and forth at each other, seemingly unsure of what to do. Rosalie huffed loudly to show her anger and pointed to me. Lights were shined on me again and she pushed them out of my face, growing angrier. One of them looked at me and asked me something in Russian. I looked to Rosalie in a panic but she was quick to answer me. "Your passport." I nodded to her, pulling it out of my pocket and handing it to the guard. He took it brusquely from me and shined the light on my eyes again. I could have sworn that I heard Rosalie growl but before I could dwell on it she slammed the officer's hand down again, taking the light from my eyes. He appeared to glare at her, but it was obvious who won that battle for he merely mumbled something and shined the light on my passport again. While he was looking, Rosalie stared straight ahead at the city. I looked to the guard that didn't have my passport and noticed that his eyes were roving over Rosalie's figure. It made me angry and I coughed loudly, bringing Rosalie's eyes down on me. However when she did I paid her no mind and instead looked to the guard. He glared at me but then turned his eyes to his partner. He flipped through my passport a time or two, then handed it back to me before turning to talk with his partner.

When they still looked confused, she looked disappointedly at them and reached into her pocket, pulling out two one hundred dollar bills. The held the money in their hands as if it was something they'd never had before. It was hard to look at. However, they soon smiled at her and stepped out of the way. She thanked them coldly and soon enough I was being pulled away from the guards, watching as they studied Rosalie's backside. Jerks. It made me angry, but she didn't seem aware of it, so there was no point in pushing it.

With her help I only slipped once more to the car she'd rented. The car turned out to be something that looked almost like a Hummer. I suppose it made sense to have one of these things in Siberia, but I still didn't like those cars, name brand or not. Rosalie helped me up into the beast of a car and threw the carryon in the back before she climbed in and started the engine. She turned the heater on to full blast and shut off the vents on her side and rolled down her window a bit. I sat there for a few moments, shivering in my seat and Rosalie floored the accelerator, making the car roar, even though we were still in park. It must have helped with the heat though because soon enough I felt the car warming, on my side at least.

"Rosalie?" I asked as she pulled the car down the road. "What was up with those guards?"

"Norilsk is extremely polluted. Because of the pollution they've closed the city to foreigners. I had to do a bit of explaining to get them from throwing us right back on that plane. Forgive me but I also made you out as the victim shivering in the cold. Your lips are blue. I hope the heater turns up quickly."

I decided to ignore the part about being weak, since it was the truth. "And the deciding point was American dollars?"

She nodded, seemingly proud of herself. "It almost always is. Especially in this sadly destitute country. So much potential…"

"Rosalie for president," I offered, genuinely surprised when she smiled a bit.

"Da," she answered. I laughed and we didn't talk anymore. Rosalie drove quickly and unsurprisingly. Occasionally, the car would stall and Rosalie would mutter something quickly at it. If the car stalled under Rosalie's pristine driving then it definitely had to be a hunk of junk. Perhaps Russian cars were? I didn't know and now didn't seem to be the time to ask.

By the time we reached the border of the city the sun was shining brightly and people were bustling about in their overly large but necessary clothing. I watched them as I passed and noted the way that they stared at the car. Then I looked at the few cars that passed us and realized just how nice of a car this was. It made me feel uncomfortable so I took to looking at the buildings instead.

They all looked exactly the same. The same color, build, design, everything. It must have been Communist influence if these buildings weren't built in the communist era. It was very depressing. The few people that were walking around were crouched as if their bodies had grown that way to brace the severe weather. They all looked deathly pale with dark rings under their eyes. For a moment I wondered if we were in Sangvine, because they all looked so much like vampires. Then I noticed large tubes sticking out of the sky. Smoke was pouring out of them and it didn't look at all sanitary. That must have been due to the city being closed.

Thankfully we only drove for a few more minutes before Rosalie pulled up in front of a store. Again, and of course, I couldn't read the sign. But I did look in the window and see a much broader range of clothing. My chattering teeth looked to Rosalie for thanks but she was already on the other side of the car, opening my door for me and helping me to climb down. We had entered the shop, which had just barely opened and Rosalie greeted the clerk, who didn't smile. Russians didn't smile. It was a cultural thing…one that I was having trouble getting used to.

I didn't need to dwell on it much, however, because Rosalie quickly pulled me away from the clerk and down an aisle. For me she chose a large white jacket, white ski pants, a white hat, white face cover and white boots and white gloves. When I held up the seventh white article of clothing she shrugged. "It's best if you're as unnoticed as possible in Sangvine. Snow is white, if you haven't noticed."

"Oh ha, ha," I answered her, though I had to admit I liked the way she thought. Rosalie made no response to that. In fact, she was glaring rather intently at a pair of socks. "Rosalie?" I asked softly, reaching out to her. She turned before I could reach her and clutched onto my shoulders.

"Do you know how serious this is?" she urged in a hushed tone. "The Regentoi will rip you apart appendage by appendage and drink you like wine. And that's only after you'll get to watch each and every one of us die at their hands. So don't you 'ha ha' me like you're not taking this seriously, Bella! Because it is very, very serious." She glared at me, giving me one final shake and my eyes widened. Rosalie was…afraid. Rosalie, the most intimidating woman in the world, was scared to death. Her methods worked, however, for the thought of them all being ripped apart suddenly became a very real notion to me. I began to shiver, and Rosalie seemed pleased, for she let me go. She ripped the tags off of everything and told me to go put them on. I did as I was told and emerged, a swollen marshmallow, to find Rosalie finished paying. She opened the door for me and I thought I heard the distinct sound of the clerk laughing at me but couldn't be sure.

The wind was still blowing terribly and clouds were overhead, looking rather ominous. With all of my clothes Rosalie turned off the heater and drove quickly out of town. The drive was bumpy and every so often Rosalie would sigh or scoff at the car as if she was disappointed in it. I felt sorry for the car after awhile. The drive went on for a long time. I didn't know how long exactly but I did know that despite the fear I had for the Regentoi I was starting to grow bored. Rosalie still wasn't talking much and she had rolled her sleeves up. I glanced over at them and looked at the scars again. It made my chest hurt again to look at them. "Will those ever go away?" I asked, not having to tell her what I was talking about.

"No, bites and scratches inflicted by other vampires stay."

"I'm sorry,"

"For what?"

"For…evoking all of that. For all of this."

"Don't apologize, Bella. Things happen. I did what was necessary to protect my family. A few scars here and there are well worth it."

I nodded at what she said but didn't really believe it. So instead I turned away and looked out the window. The car lurched to a stop then and I jumped, looking over at Rosalie. She had pulled the car over and was now in the process of glaring at me, like she usually did. "Let's get something straight, Bella. We just travelled halfway across the world to satisfy your little Snow White story. We are both facing death upon discovery and you've seen me in a less than healthy state. Do you think that I would endure all of this if you were merely a meal I couldn't have? I told you that you were family. You'd better believe it."

"Yes, ma'am."

Rosalie looked slightly confused at my response but let it slide, throwing the car back in gear and travelling back down the road. I watched her as she drove, thinking about what she'd said. And after a while, it started to sink in. All that Rosalie had really done for me, she didn't have to. She was doing this out of…out of love? I smiled at her and she paid no mind to it if she saw it, which I'm certain she did. We drove for a bit more and I reached into the back seat for some food. I found a granola bar and offered it lightheartedly to Rosalie. She rolled her eyes at me and I thought that was a pretty good reaction all things considered. It was about three in the afternoon and I couldn't see a thing. The sun was blinding against the white snow, even through the overcast. I pulled the visor down and my hood over my eyes, which helped somewhat. Rosalie looked over at me struggling and pulled the car off the road, veering it to the right and taking the sun out of my eyes.

"Thank you," I said, my eyes readjusting to the normalcy. She nodded at me, then looked at the clock on the car.

"We're about three hours away from Sangvine. It'd be best to wait here for an hour or two, that way it will be darker by the time we get there. I'm going to drive around the city and we'll walk to the cabin. This car will draw unwanted attention."

"Other vampires don't have cars?"

"They've no real need for a car. Most of them never leave the city. It's suicide to try."

"You did,"

"I had a car."

"Oh. What happens if they do?"

"Even with their speed, with no car they get too hungry by the time they reach civilization. They go on sort of a hunting spree on the town, drawing immense attention, of course. If they choose to act out, a member of the Regentoi is sent out to kill them. A vampire hasn't dared leave the city in hundreds of years."

"Was your departure noticed?"

"I was careful. I don't think anyone was really aware. My assumption is that if someone had been following me, I'd already be dead."

"But someone could be out there?" I looked nervously around the car and saw nothing but the burning snow. Rosalie appeared to look behind us as well, but she seemed much calmer than me.

"If there was someone close enough for us to be worried, I'd sense them."

"Oh, well that's good again. If they're human deprived as you say they are."

Rosalie nodded, then looked over to me. Her eyes hardened and she faced the windshield for a moment, her hands gripping on the steering wheel. "Bella, chances are that my family hasn't fed for some time. They don't feed on humans, you know. And there aren't many if at all animals this far north. They're going to be hungry."

"I trust—

"It has nothing to do with trust, Bella. There is a part of us that isn't human. No matter how much we love you or you trust us, the hunger doesn't care. If I tell you to run, don't stand there and trust. Run. Do you understand me?"

"Yes," I said sadly. The thought of Alice attacking me was all too real. Because she'd done it before, and would have succeeded in hurting me if her family had not intervened. But even then I wasn't all that afraid. Everyone had been there and everyone had good intentions. Picturing them all attacking me, wanting my blood, made me want to vomit. Rosalie looked me over, then sighed.

"That's not to say that they will attack you. I'm just telling you to be warned. I will most likely be the vampire in the most control aside from Carlisle, maybe. I am the one to listen to. Talking of trust, you are going to have to trust me."

"I do trust you." Rosalie looked in my eyes, daring me to take that comment back. But I had no reason to. I shook my head, repeating, "I do trust you."

She nodded, then relaxed against her seat. "And another thing. When we enter Sangvine there will be loads of vampires roaming about. Do not pay them any mind. With any luck, they won't notice us at all, because we'll be on the outskirts of town. But I want you to stick close to me and keep your head down. Make sure that every piece of hair is tucked into that cap up yours and cover your face entirely. Even your eyes. I'll guide you. If they so much as catch a whiff of you there will be no hope of survival."

"I understand.

"The clothes do help though, with you being bundled up. It's very faint. Almost as if your blood were leftover traces on my blouse." I looked over at her, gulping. This whole eating thing was becoming very prevalent to me. Perhaps I really should have cared more about my survival during this whole ordeal. Not that Rosalie hadn't tried to tell me. I shivered a bit in my chair and looked out the window at the vastness of Siberia. The clouds were growing darker farther out. Maybe it would be storming by the time we got there. I couldn't decide if that was a good thing or not.

"I should just become a vampire. It'd make everything so much easier."

"No it wouldn't."

"Yes it would!" I shouted. "You said that it wouldn't but really, there would be no problem at all if I was a vampire! None!"

"That's where you're wrong!" Rosalie shouted back, causing me to jump just a bit. "You know nothing but your own complacency as a human! Don't speak about what you don't understand!"

"Then explain it to me! I'm all ears and we've got nothing but time!"

"I've already explained it to you! Just how violently my throat aches for your blood every moment, like my touches have to be featherlike just so I don't kill you—

"Because I'm a human! A weak, pathetic human!" My voice cracked and I could feel the tears in my eyes. Rosalie sighed slowly and turned to stare out the windshield .

"You act like your humanity is so worthless. Do you know how much I would…" she stopped, drifting from her words. She then glared at her reflection in the windshield, as if she was scolding herself for mentioning it. I wiped my eyes and scooted closer to her, as far as the center console would allow. Her hand was resting on the gearshift and I placed my hand upon hers.

"How much what?"

"Nothing. This conversation is over." Rosalie attempted to pull her hand from mine but she clearly wasn't using all of her strength, because I held it firmly. I felt her fingers pull and relax in my palm, the tendons on the top of her hand flexing with each moment. It was beautiful to see a body as perfect as hers in motion. I had often looked at Alice this way, when she moved, completely in awe of what the body could do, superhuman or not.

"How much, what, Rosalie? Talk to me." I looked to her and smiled softly. "I mean, we've both seen each other at our weakest moments. We've got literally nothing else to hide from each other."

"You don't know that."

"You should tell me."

"Why should I?"

"Because you want to."

Rosalie looked over at me, then looked at the hand that was covered by mine. She took a deep breath and though it was too quick for me to see, I felt her other hand on top of mine. I looked down at them and then looked up to see that she was staring intently at me. She looked determined. Determined and scared. "I've never really told anyone this. Well, not all of it. But it didn't seem to matter as much as it does now. Probably because a life is at stake. A human life." She looked at me and I found that I didn't have the words to say. I didn't know what she wanted me to say nor did I know of anything to say. I just knew that looking at her now, she was so incredibly beautiful. In fact, she was so beautiful that the only thing I could find myself doing was to smile at her. Much to my surprise, she returned it, though her eyes were still sad beyond all measure.

"Okay," she said slowly, her voice quivering just barely. "I'll tell you."


	27. Chapter 27

Wretch

"I was born in Rochester in 1915. My father had a secure job at a bank and as a result we were upper middle class. It was very important back then, class. And rest assured that we had plenty of it. From the time I could walk I learned posture, balancing books on my heads. My mother was strict and not a kind woman. I'm not entirely sure if she loved me or not but it doesn't matter now. She raised me to be a lady and she succeeded. For I grew into the stately grace and my looks followed suit. I may not have been the most beautiful woman in the world back then, but I was a head-turner. Mere fact, not conceit. Men came from all over it seemed, meeting with my father and mother and then grazing their eyes over the beautiful Hale daughter. It made father proud and at the time, I was happy to oblige. Anything to get a glance from the man.

"If I may be blunt, my family wasn't loving. I'm sure they did love me somewhat, but back then it was just understood. And love didn't make the family, wealth did. Wealth and class made the love, happiness and security that everyone wanted. The Hales were no different. Every day was a constant struggle to be better. You'd think it would have taken its toll on us, but we were strong. We were Hales.

"Father decided to use my looks to his advantage. He'd often parade me around at parties, asking wealthy men if they'd met his lovely daughter, Rosalie. I was only eighteen at the time but I would smile and curtsy and look just as innocent as I could be. I'd gotten several offers, but father denied them all, thinking that he could do better. He said that he could do better and that I wasn't trying hard enough. I asked him once just how he expected me to become more beautiful for his wishes. He merely scowled and headed into his office. I can still hear the ice tinkling in his nightly drink that lasted well into the morning.

"Then one morning, I was awakened by mother. She stood over me, standing tall, and looking down her nose at me, instructing me to get dressed. Father had forgotten his lunch and I was to take it to him. In all of my eighteen years, I'd never once heard of my father forgetting his lunch. Then again, I suppose if he had forgotten it, a servant would be instructed to take it to him. Mother hauled me out of bed and ripped my nightclothes off of me. I remembered that my gown snagged on my hair and pulled it. I called out in pain and she just looked at me. I absolutely hate the memory of that look. You might have thought me cold, or still do, but I am nothing compared to my mother. Or if I am, then I apologize to you here and now.

"She tore off my clothes and then threw new ones over my head. I'd never seen them before and they were a rich crimson color. I told her that I loved it and she nodded, buttoning my dress and telling me to suck in my stomach, which was as flat as it is today, by the way. After the dress she allowed a servant to handle my hair, brushing it in loving strokes. Normally I would engage the servant girl in conversation, simply out of boredom. But today, with my mother's eyes on me, neither of us felt like saying anything. To this day I still can't remember that girl's name. Perhaps I never learned it in the first place.

"From there I was plastered with makeup of my mother's doing. All the while she did my face there was an expression of contempt. It burned to see it so prevalently in her eyes and yet I couldn't look away. My own expression of unhappiness tried to rival hers. She won that day. And I was sent out the door with a lunch pail in my hands. I entered the bank, flashing a grand smile to the doorman who blushed in my presence. Father was standing a few feet away with some men, chatting idly with them. I made my way over, placing my arm on his shoulder and curtsying my apology for interrupting the conversation. 'Father,' I said as sweetly as I could muster, 'you've forgotten your lunch this morning. Mother instructed me to bring it to you. Where would you like it?' I asked sweetly, my eyes darting to the men that had encircled around us.

"Then, for the first time, my father smiled proudly at me. I felt my body tense as I saw that look in his eyes and I realized that I despised it. But I kept that smile on my face as any determined Hale would and listened as he gestured to the men. 'Gents, this is my lovely daughter, Rosalie.' There was a brief introduction and I extended my hand to all of them, which they took. When I thought I was done I started to lower my hand, only to have another shoot out from the side and grasp it. The first thing I noticed was that this hand was warm, soft, and almost tentative in the way it sought out for mine.

"I looked up into his eyes, listening as my father introduced him as Royce King. King, of the Kings who owned the very bank I was standing in. And then it all became clear, and I knew of what my job was. I smiled bashfully at him, watching as his eyes widened at my beauty. 'Rosalie, if you would be so kind as to take that to my office,' my father mentioned. He looked to Royce and Royce stood there ignorantly for a moment, still clutching onto my hand. In fact, it took so long that I had to mention that I didn't know where it was for Royce to realize he was to escort me. I looped my arm through his and he took the pail from me and we walked slowly, proudly down the center of the bank. I could feel everyone's eyes on us, measuring my beauty and his wealth and doing the calculations in her head. Back then I told myself it was admiration, and perhaps it was. The only thing that mattered to me then was that I was receiving all of the attention. Attention I never received from those closest to me.

"Just as my father had hoped, Royce took on an interest in me. He sent me various gifts, the most interesting a bouquet of violets. He said they matched my eyes. I must admit I was flattered a bit by that one. We courted only briefly before he proposed to me. I accepted on my father's behalf. Royce was attractive and wealthy and just the class that my father wanted. And he was good to me, he spoiled me. No harm done in getting married. And Royce had just the right genes for me to produce excellent children.

"All I ever wanted were children. That might come as a shock to you but my world revolved around them, even if they were just fantasies. I wanted a child to call my own. I would raise it to be strong and proud, like I was. But above all, I would raise it to know that it was loved. Sure, I might not have shown it, but my child would know. First and foremost. I didn't even know how badly I wanted one until my friend, Vera, became pregnant.

"Vera was my best and only friend. She seemed so things within me that I didn't even see in myself. And she was a lovely girl, in my class. But she did something I never could have imagined doing. She left her family to marry some impoverished carpenter. I think he was a carpenter…I didn't pay too much mind to him. He was kind to Vera and while I knew that she could have chosen someone better, she was happy. She was happy and she was with child. His name was Henry and he looked just like Emmett. Rather, Emmett looks just like he did.

"I remember when I first held him in my arms. He was so small but with such a full head of hair. And he had those glassy, beautiful newborn blue eyes. And he looked up at me, and I panicked. Would he cry or scream or form some face of disgust? My heart rocked in my chest as he observed my face. And I wondered if he could really see me or if I was a fuzzy version of his mother. But it didn't matter because he smiled at me. A grand smile that forced him to close his eyes. And I returned it. Then he yawned, and fell asleep in my cradled arms. I looked up to see Vera smiling at me, looking deeply into my eyes like she always did, seeing things that I didn't. And her husband came up behind her and placed his warm, calloused hand on her back. And they both smiled at me as I held their child.

"And I realized that my life was a façade. I saw that poor man next to my Vera, but I saw the happiness in his eyes. And I saw how that was reflected in hers. And it was the same happiness that was embedded in little Henry whom I cradled in my arms still. And I thought about how I was with Royce. I thought about how rarely he looked me in the eyes, and how rarely I looked in his. I realized how often his eyes roved my body and just how often I noticed other people's admiring stares. I was unloved, unhappy and soon to be married.

"This revelation came one winter's night. I stayed with Vera much longer than I had thought and by the time I took my leave, it was very late. Her husband offered to escort me home but I didn't think it necessary. I was such a foolish child. The streets of Rochester were cold, slightly icy and snow was falling from the sky. It was quite beautiful but I couldn't be bothered to be awed. I simply walked with my head down, wondering just what would become of my life. All I ever wanted was to be normal. Upper class, yes, but normal. And now it seemed as if that very simplistic dream was crumbling around me.

"As I turned a corner I came across a bar where the local riffraff were capping of the night. I looked at it in disgust and kept walking, quickening my pace as I heard the door opened. Men were stumbling out, laughing and shoving. I could smell the alcohol all the way across the street and wished that I could move faster. But then one of them called to me. Called to me by name, and I recognized his voice. Royce was waving me over. Every inch of me wanted to turn and continue on home. But I had already stopped, and there was nothing more that could have been done.

"I made my way over to him and smiled as he continued to play with his friends. Scotch, his favorite drink, was strong on him and reached out and caressed my cheek with his sweaty palm. I turned away in disgust, telling him that he was drunk. But he clutched onto my arm, ignoring me otherwise. 'Isn't she lovely, gents?' he asked to his friends, his speech slurred with drool dripping from his chin. 'Isn't she the most beautiful girl you've ever seen? And she's all mine. Every part of her come wedding night.'

"They all laughed and I gasped in abhorrence of them. One of them reached out to stroke my hair and I shook him away, tearing from Royce's grasp. They looked at me, shocked in their drunken stupor and I straightened my coat, informing Royce that I would see him at home when he sobered up. From the moment I turned around I knew that it was too easy. I felt someone's hands on me and before I could think I was thrown into the alley behind the bar. I opened my mouth to scream, and received a quick kick to the jaw. Needless to say it shut me up for the moment. And as I writhed on the cold Rochester ground I heard one of them say: 'Who said you had to wait until the wedding night, Roy?'

"The next thing I knew I was being picked up. My coat was thrown to the ground and I felt the winter air bursting against my shoulders. They threw me into a wall, delivering kicks or punches whenever I made too much noise, and robbed me of my innocence…three times over. And I let them. Beaten and bruised I let them inside of me, my screams muffled by all the blood in my throat. Royce was the last to go, and the most forceful. By the time he finished I somehow knew consciously, in spite of all my pain, that I would never be able to bear children after this. He turned me around, kissed me on my swollen and bleeding lip, and allowed me to fall to the floor.

"I heard them walking away. I could feel the cold air upon my heated body and I smelled the stench of Scotch and sweat in my hair. My insides were burning with fire and I tried to count the number of bones that were broken to keep me from passing out. It didn't help and I was so tired. I closed my eyes, filling my thoughts of Henry in hopes that my last vision alive would not be the attack I had just encountered.

"But then I awoke. I awoke to more pain than I thought imaginable. A real fire, coursing through my veins. It took weeks, but finally I met Carlisle without pain blinding my eyes. He explained the situation to me and were it not for appearance, I wouldn't have believed him. I didn't want to believe him. Living forever was never an option for me, unless it was in the kingdom of heaven. And I didn't want it. But it was too late. I was damned and betrothed again.

"Carlisle found me in the alley, a few heartbeats from death. Thinking only of his precious boy, he decided to change me. And I became Rosalie Lillian Hale all over again. And I was beautiful and powerful and nothing all at once. Edward took one look at me and turned up his nose. I was no good for him, so it all was for naught. Such cruel turns of events to have my afterlife turn out just as my life had, all for naught. A wasted attempt of perfection, achieved on the outside, but not inside. Carlisle, despite his disappointment, allowed me to stay with them. I agreed only to see the look on Edward's face.

"When I could control myself, I went back for Royce. I told him beforehand in messages, written in the blood of his accomplices that night. Not literally, of course, as I was still too young to tolerate fresh blood. But he knew, regardless. He'd read of their brutal deaths in the paper and despite his ignorance, managed to connect the dots. I have to admit that I was a bit proud to find that he had locked himself in a vault of his own bank. He didn't underestimate my power, for once. But it didn't matter in the end. I tortured him until his weak and pathetic human body could no longer take it. Then I watched him die, watched the life drain from his eyes. And I did not drink a single drop of blood. I have never had human blood.

"I was in my wedding dress when I killed him. It seemed only right to put it to good use, even if I would never use it again. However, I was wrong. I did end up using it. I wore that dress the first time Emmett and I got married. No one understood my reasoning. I didn't understand my own reasoning. But I wore that dress on my wedding day. And it was one of the happiest days of my afterlife.

"But I was still right. This life given to me time and time again is worthless. For, I still cannot bear children. My one and only desire mocks me every time I look at you. Every time I see the life in your eyes, the same eyes that roll when your father calls. Every time I hear your thundering heart which never ceases. Every time I see you, Bella, I'm reminded of what I cannot have. And what you can. Please, don't throw your life away like I did. My death was not my fault, but the happiness I lacked in my final moments was. Enjoy your life; don't throw it away so easily like I did. Rosalie Lillian Hale: wretch that I am."

She had been looking out the window the entire time, watching as the sun tried to set over the vast horizon. Her eyes never blinked, never moved, and it was clear that she had forgotten that I was here until the very end. Tears were pouring down my cheeks but I had kept my composure. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. Rosalie didn't deserve all of that. She was…she was…

"You're the most beautiful person in the world," I said quietly. Rosalie made no response to me but I knew that she heard me. "You deserve so much better. You always did." She still made no response and that only made me sadder. She didn't see it. She didn't understand. I couldn't let her ignore me like she was. Somehow, she had to know. Without another rational thought I lunged towards her, wrapping my arms around her neck. I leaned in then to kiss her cheek, fully intent on making her realize just how special she was. What I hadn't planned on was Rosalie turning her head in surprise.

My lips met hers but before I could pull away, my senses reacted. They told me that these lips were hard and cold. Alice. I pushed harder into them, closing my eyes as Alice engulfed my thoughts. I felt her against me and I could smell that beautiful scent. Alice was with me now and everything was okay. Porcelain hands were on my cheeks and it only took me a moment to realize their size before they pushed me away, ever so gently. And Rosalie was looking back at me. I couldn't read her expression. I swallowed hard and closed my eyes, realizing that I had just ruined everything. Rosalie continued to stare at me. I could feel her eyes burning into me but I couldn't bring myself to look at them.

"I thought you were Alice," I said quietly, facing forward in my seat and daring my eyes open to look at the setting sun.

"I know," Rosalie answered, her voice heavy, "which is exactly why I'm going to pretend that never happened."

I opened my mouth to respond but Rosalie started the car. "It's time to go," she said coldly, putting the car in drive and continuing down the road. I looked down the road, somehow hopeful. Rosalie hadn't killed me. And she had opened up to me. She loved me, and I loved her. And we were on our way to Alice.

"We can do this," I said to Rosalie. She didn't look at me but I watched her hands tighten on the steering wheel.

"We're going to die."


	28. Chapter 28

Sangvine

We'd been driving for ages when Rosalie finally cut the engine. I'd been looking down at my hands for awhile, trying not to fall asleep as it darkened outside. But as soon as the engine was off I shot up, only to see…nothing. I looked to Rosalie, who was still staring straight ahead, and turned my head to the side. "Is something wrong, Rosalie?" I asked. She shook her head and exhaled slowly, reaching into the back of the car for the rest of my clothes.

"We're on the outskirts of Sangvine. We're going to have to walk the rest of the way because the car will draw attention. Put these on." She threw another pair of pants and two undershirts my way. I didn't think I would be able to move with them on but I dfidn't argue. Rosalie didn't seem to be in the mood. When I'd pulled on all of my clothes I was surprised to find that I could still move, but stiffly. Rosalie looked me over and then pulled out a knitted tube looking thing, throwing it over my head. She pulled it off of my face and then back up so it rested just beneath my eyes. Already my breath was hot against the fabric and it caused my lips to sweat but still I didn't say anything. Rosalie's eyes flickered up and down my wardrobe twice more before she nodded, then leaned closer to me.

"It's a bit of a walk, I'm afraid. It will be cold. Colder than you can possibly imagine right now. I want you to try and keep your head as best as you can and hang on to me. We shouldn't see anyone but if we do I need you to stand tall without my support and pay them no mind. This is so very important, Bella. Do you understand?" I nodded, unable to do anything else and Rosalie zipped up her tiny down vest and stepped out of the car. Though the night was clear, the wind was howling. I'd not only heard it in the car but now I could see it as it seemed to try to tear Rosalie's roots from her scalp. However, she looked as if she didn't feel a thing and came around to my side, opening the door.

Wind rushed through me as she helped me down onto the hard snow. It felt like ice underneath me and it probably was but I wasn't going to dare look down. While I had been roasting in the car, I was now freezing. I was certain that the sweat clinging to my body had frozen against me and I kept my head down as the wind fought to bite through. Rosalie's arm was looped through mine and I clung onto for dear life, knowing that I wouldn't have a chance in hell of surviving should I fall behind.

The wind was positively a banshee as it raced through my burning ears and attempted to throw me down several times, screeching all the while. But Rosalie could easily hold her ground and through her I was able to keep walking. After what seemed like an hour I couldn't feel my feet. I tried to tell Rosalie this but didn't have the strength to open my mouth. So I kept up with the motions as best as I could, trying to walk even though I was floating on air.

At one point, when the wind died down I looked up. Tiny little cottages were popping up out of the snow. Lights were on inside of them but no smoke coming from the chimneys. There were a few larger looking buildings and to the very far right of the village that could only be Sangvine there was a massive tower looking building. It hovered over the entire city, covering it shadow and from the top I could see smoke pouring from the roof. It was a strange color. A mixture of black and purple and I didn't like it so I kept my head down again.

Rosalie gave me a gentle tug and I looked up. Suddenly, I was being lifted, objects flying all around me. I thought perhaps I was dying, that hypothermia was taking its toll on me. I tried to remember Rosalie's words of keeping my head, but I didn't know where I'd lost it. And then we were on the ground again, and I was tripping over my feet. Rosalie held me and soon after I was steady, I realized that the wind was no longer howling. Well, it was, but it wasn't affecting me. I looked up at my guardian and noticed that she had crouched down near a pile of wood. The pile of wood just happened to be a cabin. We were standing on the side of it and Rosalie was crouched beneath the window, gently lifting her head to peer through. I assumed she looked and it was too quick for me to see for looked at me and put her finger to her lips. I nodded and she reached for my hand. I had to crawl beneath the window, not nearly as flexible as Rosalie and followed her as we rounded the house. Rosalie took a deep breath, looked down at me, and then opened the door.

The light from the cottage shone in my eyes and I put my hand up to shield the glare as I stepped in. The first thing that I noticed was that it was still cold. In fact, the only difference between the inside of this cabin and outside was the light and perhaps a little less wind. We were in the living room and I could see a fireplace, a couch and a table and chairs. My eyes finally adjusted to the light and I lowered my hand, focusing on the vampires that stood before me. The image of them hit me hard and I almost doubled over at the site of Carlisle and Esme. They looked to be just as surprised. Edward was standing in the corner with a look of horror on his face. But it wasn't directed at me, it was directed to my right. I followed his eyes and found Rosalie snuggly in the arms of Emmett, who swung her from side to side, though he kept his eyes on me.

"Bella, you're alive?" Carlisle gasped in utter disbelief. Rosalie and I looked to each other and then I looked back to Carlisle and his black eyes.

Black eyes.

I gulped and looked around the room again. All of them, even Carlisle had blackened eyes. Rosalie had warned me of this but I still hadn't thought that it would be this severe. Carlisle still looked very composed but I noticed that his arm was gripping Esme's shoulder. And Esme was gripping the chair, not breathing. Edward was still horrorstruck and breathing and Rosalie must have noticed Emmett's condition for she pushed him back to the far wall and held him there. He made no attempt to fight her but kept his eyes locked with mine. Carlisle turned to Rosalie and spoke. It was so quick that I heard nothing but a distant mumble. And yet within a moment I was swept up by Rosalie and held by her as blurred visions filled the room, then disappeared. When time finally slowed down, Carlisle was at the door, closing it quietly behind him. He went over to the table where their light source was, a lamp, and turned it off, looking out the window as he did so. Then he looked to me and Rosalie and gestured us to the table. He tried to smile at me but it didn't work. I couldn't say that I blamed him but I sat down as instructed and rolled the tube under my chin.

"Bella," he said to me, his voice in a whisper, "I'm sorry about that. But the others are not strong enough to handle your blood right now. We haven't fed for weeks, you see. It's very difficult here. Now, explain to me how you're alive."

"I…don't know what you mean, Carlisle," I answered slowly. Carlisle looked at me for a moment but then nodded.

"Alice had a vision. She saw you in Victoria's grasp. And then she could see no more. We all thought that you had died."

"No, no Jacob Black came to save me. Him and the werewolves managed to get me away from Victoria. They chased her away again but didn't catch her." Carlisle's eyebrows rose at this and he looked to Rosalie for clarification. She nodded and then spoke too quickly for me again. Carlisle nodded slowly at her and then turned back to face me.

"Werewolves…that would explain so much. If only Alice hadn't of sprinted off so quickly. But there was no stopping her or Edward. If only they hadn't brought us here." Carlisle swept his arm around the cabin and held his face in his hands. I'd never seen the good doctor lose it like this before. Perhaps it was the lack of food as well as everything. I didn't know.

"So why are you here?" I asked back just as quietly. Carlisle's eyes darted to Rosalie's and she shook her head. He then sighed and looked my way.

"Alice wanted to come here. She was willing to go alone but we would have none of that. This is no place to be without protection."

"Why did Alice want to come here?"

"Bella, I assume you know about Alice's vision?" Carlisle asked. I shook my head and he furrowed his brow. He then looked to Rosalie, rather frustrated. "I was informed that she had told Bella."

"Well, apparently she didn't. If she was supposed to do it in the woods I never heard it. Then again, Edward was there as well. Who knows what he made her think," Rosalie hissed, resulting in a growl from Carlisle. My eyes widened as I sat back in the chair. Carlisle never growled. And now, he was snarling at Rosalie, his daughter, with his hand threatening to crack the wood of the table. Rosalie appeared not to be worried, however, as she gestured to me slowly. Carlisle looked my way and stopped growling, relaxing back in the chair.

"Bella, I'm so very sorry for that. Not feeding makes us irritable. It's not excuse, but I'm sorry."

"It's okay. What about this vision?"

Carlisle sighed and leaned forward on the table clasping his hands. "When Alice first started interacting with you, she had a vision. It was a vision of you, as a vampire. Now, this frightened Alice to no end because while she could see you as a vampire, she couldn't see the cause. I don't know if you know this or not, Bella, but transforming into one of us is the worst pain imaginable. No one should ever have to go through it." Rosalie made a noise and Carlisle stiffened then, but continued on.

"Alice wanted to know the cause of your transformation. If you were changed willingly or by an enemy. But her visions would tell her nothing. She even allowed Edward into her mind to see if she was missing something, but there was nothing. Nothing to show how you became one of us. And when we had that scare in the woods, it was the last straw for Alice."

"You mean Edward," Rosalie said quickly, crossing her arms. Carlisle looked over at her and Rosalie shook her head. "Don't you tell one side of this story to spare your son, Carlisle. He knows what he did, and Bella should too." She gestured to me with her hands and I gulped, looking to Carlisle. He glared at Rosalie for a moment, but Rosalie always won those wars, so he looked back at me, defeated.

"Edward spoke with Alice. He convinced her that you didn't want to be one of us, and there was no sense in prolonging the inevitable…breakup of you two. For Alice had seen that as well. But Alice would not listen to Edward. She wanted to stay with you for as long as possible and get the truth from you when you were ready. It wasn't until the attack on the field that she realized just how dangerous we all were to each other.

"However, Edward reminded her of the Sangvinicheski. They are the governing power over the vampires. They all have certain powers, some more prominent than others. At the head of the Regentoi is Kirill. Kirill has no ability as far as anyone knows but he is the oldest vampire to date. By his side is his brother, Taras, who can erase one's memory with a single touch. By their sides they have a bodyguard, Yuri, who can evoke trances to stop potential enemies. But the one Edward mentioned… his name is Leonid, Kirill's son, so to speak. He has the ability to see the future. Not like Alice, however. For Leonid's visions are concrete. He sees what will happen after all decisions have been made. No subjectivity.

"The Regentoi have wisely recognized the potency of this power and as a result, Leonid is kept away from others. Leonid has also been forced to only answer when he is asked a specific question. For if he told the Regentoi everything, they wouldn't be able to keep up with it all. His power is too strong to be used lightly, however the Regentoi know that a power such as that could one day lead them to greatness. Leonid has told them so. And Leonid will tell you exactly what will happen in the future, if you pay a hefty price. Alice was planning on seeing him." Both of the vampire's eyes darkened and I could see Rosalie glowering to my left.

"What's the price?"

Carlisle looked up and he and Rosalie exchanged glances before they both shook their heads. "It doesn't matter now. Alice didn't go."

"Why was she going to go to him in the first place?"

"Alice had to know the truth of what was happening to you. She had to know the causes of your transformation. And she was willing to go Leonid to find out. Fortunately, Alice saw the vision of you before she left to see him."

I glared at him then. "Fortunately? It's fortunate that Alice saw me die? That's terrible, Carlisle! Where is she? I've got to speak to her now!" I stood, only to feel Rosalie's hand on my arm. She practically threw me back in the chair and cast her infamous glare my way.

"You will stay and listen to everything he has to say," she said quietly. "Too much has happened on misconceptions already." I opened my mouth to argue with her, only to find that she was right. So I sighed, and looked back at Carlisle, who looked positively ragged.

"Why is better for Alice to have seen me die then to go to Leonid?" I asked politely.

"The Regentoi, as I've said, are the leaders of the vampires. They have a set of rules. And those rules are enforced. The only penalty for breaking these rules is death. The main rule, and the one that pertains to our situation, is to keep ourselves secret from humans unless of course we're feeding. Thankfully, the Regentoi don't care much with what happens in the states…for now. But, if Alice were to go Leonid and they were to find out about you, Bella, she would be murdered on the spot. We would all be murdered on the spot. For you." He looked at me then and while his eyes were kind I felt tears welling in my eyes.

I didn't want them to have to go through all of this. I couldn't imagine any of them dying on me. I'd already lost them once, losing them again would be too much to take. "You shouldn't be here," I murmured. "I'm not worth all of this, all of your lives. I'm sorry," I said, closing my eyes to try to stop from crying. I felt a hand on my shoulder and opened my eyes to see Carlisle reaching across the table to me.

"You're family, Bella. And you are worth it. Don't forget that. But, it was very rash for you to be brought here," he said, his eyes darting to Rosalie. She opened her mouth to speak but I beat her to it.

"I wanted to come, Carlisle. Rosalie told me about Alice's catatonia. I might be the only person to wake her up."

"Be that as it may, this is very, very dangerous. A lot of lives are at stake simply so you can play hero. I just hope you know what you're doing." He looked to Rosalie again and sighed. "Alice isn't here. She's retreated herself to another unoccupied cabin a few miles behind this one. She wants to be alone. I'm not even sure if she's still there."

Carlisle's words certainly didn't help the tears in my eyes and I wiped them furiously as I stood up, pulling the tube back over my mouth. "Rosalie, let's go," I said quickly, motioning to the door. I'd had enough of this bullshit. Well, it wasn't bullshit but I was tired of being so close and yet so far to Alice. She had suffered enough. We both had. And it was time to make amends. Rosalie stood obediently and proceeded to have a quick conversation with Carlisle that I didn't catch. Then she nodded to me and I opened the door. Rosalie stepped out first, looking around, and I followed.

The Cullen cabin was apparently on the outskirts of town for once we turned our backs to it, there seemed to be nothing ahead of us. I clung to Rosalie as I had so many times before, hoping that she knew her way. Rosalie had gotten me this far, and I knew that she would take care of me again. There was the sound of someone running, and Rosalie growled, and before I knew it, I was on the ground. "How are you alive?" Edward shouted as he sat on top of me, shaking my shoulders. I felt as if my head was going to be popped off he was shaking me so hard. I tried to keep steady and looked deeply into his coal black eyes, waiting for when Rosalie came to my rescue.

And she did, not a second later, colliding with Edward and knocking him off me. I scrambled to my feet and backed away, watching as the two blurs fought on the ground. Rosalie was shouting something and as the blurs came into focus, I saw her on top of his chest, her knees on his elbows and her perfect hands around his neck. "You are not an animal," she said through clenched teeth, watching as he nodded beneath her. Slowly, she removed her hands from his neck and stood, stepping off of him and watching as he stood. The next thing I knew, Rosalie was by my side, standing slightly in front of me and watching Edward with hard eyes as he came near. He stopped a few feet away and glared at me, taking deep breaths.

"You should not be alive. Alice saw you dead," he said coldly.

"Well, she, and you were wrong," I returned.

"Do you know what you're doing to me? Do you know what you're causing this family? Everything was wonderful before you! Everything!" He was sounding like an insolent child now and I half expected him to stamp his foot. But he didn't. He merely stared at me, waiting for me to say something. I didn't know what to say. Then he huffed and looked at me condescendingly. It made me angry, and thus came the words.

"Everything was wonderful for me before you took Alice away! You fed her lies, Edward! And she trusted you! How dare you act like you care for her when you only think of yourself!" My throat was raw and my lips chapped from the cold but it felt so good. It felt so good for him to hear the truth. He took another step forward and Rosalie growled, stopping him in his tracks.

"It's not right. It's not right for a vampire and human to be in love," he said quietly.

"Keep telling yourself that," I answered, stepping towards him. "Edward, I'm sorry that you don't like me. But it's not your decision. Alice and I are in love. And we should be able to lie in our own beds, not the one you made for us." Edward looked up at me as if he was about to say something, then shut his mouth. He lowered his head and turned away, waving us on as he did so. Rosalie had a hold of my arm again and soon we were on our way.

We were on our way to Alice.


	29. Chapter 29

Sleeping Beauty

I didn't think it was possible for the temperature to actually get colder, but that was happening. I was stinging everywhere. My body was literally screaming at me as I clutched to Rosalie, hoping that she would provide some warmth. That was moronic, of course, but I couldn't help it. Thankfully though, the wind had died down and I could actually hear myself think. Not so thankfully, I could tell that Rosalie was growing annoyed with my chattering teeth. But I couldn't help it, and she knew that so she stayed quiet about it. As we walked I kept hearing Edward's words in my ear, seeing his actions…trying to read his expressions. What was he getting at? Surely he didn't want me dead. I mean, how many people actually wish death on someone. It's just not right. There had to be something there. Cautiously I looked to Rosalie and opened my mouth in an attempt to keep my teeth from chattering.

"W-w-what's Edward's d-deal?" I asked, trying desperately to keep from stuttering but failing entirely. Rosalie looked down at me and for a moment it looked as if she was proud. But that didn't seem to make any sense at all.

"Edward is very old fashioned. He believes in chivalry and kissing a girl only on the cheek until they're wed. He's also a very determined rule follower. As we've all said many times, vampires are not to consort with humans unless they're feeding. Imagine his surprise to find that his dear sister was not only attracted to a human, but a female human at that." Rosalie smirked to herself, then nodded thoughtfully.

"This is not to say that vampires aren't attracted to humans. Because we are, very much. Lust feeds on our thirst as well. It sounds terrible to say but most vampires were beautiful and in shape before they were turned. We were once human after all." She grimaced again and I pursed my lips together, trying desperately not to think about the story she'd told me, her story.

"But before you came along, it was ridiculous to fall in love with a human and keep them human. But here you are." She looked down at me and I thought for a moment that she was almost smiling. I returned what I thought I saw and Rosalie brought her arm, and subsequently me, closer to her.

"But I don't get it. It's none of his business."

"Oh but it is, Bella, just as it is mine. We are a coven, a family. It's our job to protect each other, to keep us strong enough to carry on all of these years. One slip of the tongue, sun or a pesky heartbeat can easily ruin what has been decades in the making. I don't blame him."

"Really? Then why did you come to my aid?"

"I already told you. I consider you family. If Alice wants you in the family, there's nothing much I can do but accept it."

"Oh, so you're only going along with it because of Alice?" I asked slowly. Rosalie stopped walking and I looked down to the hardened ground. At first it didn't seem plausible. I mean, Rosalie had gone through so much for me, but maybe she was just a practical person. Maybe I was just some kind of toy she liked to play with and use to piss of her family.

"I used to," Rosalie answered slowly, breaking me from my thoughts. For a moment, I thought she'd read my mind. Then she shrugged and looked down. "But now I guess I could see maybe where Alice is coming from. But that scent of yours is rather distracting."

"So, it would be okay if you changed me? It would be okay with Edward?"

Rosalie sighed, shaking her head. "I'm not going to get into that discussion with you again. Edward is complicated and spoiled and all around not worth your wasted effort."

I smiled up at her. "That's what they said about you." In spite of her best efforts, Rosalie couldn't stop the grin that snuck onto her face. She looked down rather proudly at me again and shrugged.

"I suppose you do have a point there. But don't take any of this too personally."

"Oh, right, of course not," I answered just as sarcastically as we kept walking. It was quiet then for awhile and my body had stopped stinging. In fact, it was just numb. But I kept walking somehow, most likely with Rosalie half carrying me along the way. The sky was still kind of bright despite the late hour and off in the distance it looked like there were trees. I had no idea if they really were trees or not because I had no clue if trees grew this far north. Just when I looked up to ask the question, I saw it.

It was tiny, very tiny. There looked to be one door and one window and at first glance I would have thought it a storage shed instead of a cabin. But that was it. It had to be it. Alice was in that cabin. And it was just a football field or so away. In all of my staring it suddenly became noticeable that I was pulling Rosalie along as I walked. I turned around to look back at her and saw that she was still walking, but her head was looking behind us. After some maneuvering I determined that she was glaring at something behind us. While it worried me a bit, I couldn't help but feel slightly pissed that right now, at this moment when we were so close, she decided to slow down. Suddenly, she was facing me again. I jumped at her rapid change and she smiled at me, gesturing towards the cabin.

"Why don't you get a head start?" she asked kindly. "I'll take my time out here so that you two can sort everything out."

"Are you—?

"Bella, you're wasting time," she chided almost motherly and it made me feel warm and sick at the same time. But she was also right. Alice was right there and I was just standing here. I quickly reached up and embraced her, feeling how she actually hugged me back. Then I let go and started running towards the cabin. I looked back once to see Rosalie still standing in place, watching me as I went. It made me smile and I quickened pace as much as I could as I headed towards the cabin. My movements were slow and hindered by the cold and my clothes but I could see the cabin drawing nearer. By the time I actually reached it, I leaned against the door, catching my breath and feeling the air as it rushed down my raw throat. The lights were off in the cabin and I couldn't see inside the window. But the door was unlocked and I took a deep breath as I pulled it open.

Again, darkness engulfed me. I swallowed and sifted my cell phone from my pocket. I didn't have signal but it provided me with just enough light to find my way around. There was a table with a single chair in the middle of the room and to the right was a bed. My light flashed over it and I jumped in surprise when I saw someone sitting on the bed. Their arms were down at their sides, gripping the sides of the mattress and they leaned forward just a bit, as if they were looking for something. I recognized the pale skin and spiked hair instantly and ran forward, wrapping my arms around her neck.

"Alice," I breathed into the column of her throat, hugging her tightly. She made no response to me, didn't even move in my arms and I sighed, nodding to myself as I pulled away. I shined the light on her face and noted that her eyes were pitch black, glossed over in the catatonia Rosalie had mentioned. She wasn't even breathing. It made my heart ache to see her like this but she was here, and I was here with her, and I wouldn't let her slip away so easily again. I slowly reached out and placed my hand on her cheek, rubbing it up and down.

"Alice, Alice can you hear me? I'm here, Alice. I'm here and I'm alive."

Still no response.

I leaned forward; making sure that my breath was hitting her face, and placed the inside of my wrist to her neck, hoping she'd feel the pulse. My heart was racing, and that could only help the matter. "Come on, Alice," I whispered, growing desperate as she continued to make no progress. When I lost hope in that I leaned forward and kissed her lips, praying that maybe the fairy tales were right. They weren't, and Alice stayed still as stone. I began to cry. I couldn't help it. Here I'd been, through so much for her, so close and yet so far, risking mine and everyone's life, and she wouldn't even wake up.

In a moment of anger, I reached out and grabbed the both of her stone shoulders, shaking them violently. Her marble body barely moved in response to me but I still shook her. Her head lolled back and forth just a bit and I couldn't take it anymore.

I screamed.

I screamed loudly, harshly. It made my throat hurt to scream like I did but I didn't care. I screamed as I shook her, tears running down my face and freezing to my cheeks as I tried desperately not to completely fall apart. And then I noticed something.

I noticed that Alice was no longer moving in response to my shaking. My hands were merely pushing back and forth against her, inflicting no reaction. I had put my phone up earlier but even in the dim light I could see her eyes flickering. I gasped, utterly furious at myself that I couldn't form a coherent thought at the moment. Alice's chest started to rise and fall and she lowered her head and I felt a low, guttural growl enter the room as she woke up. It frightened me, but not near enough as it should have and I stayed exactly where I was with my hands on Alice's shoulders. Suddenly, Alice's head lifted. My eyes widened and I didn't know if she saw that or not. Then, just barely, her voice carried over the silence in the cabin. It was faint, but still sweet and light and beautiful and it made my heart race just to hear it.

"Bella," she called out tentatively, "I heard you scream."

I lunged myself at her, clutching her as tightly as my weak human body would allow. The realization seemed to hit her at the same time for her arms were around me, holding me so very firmly, but not hurting me. I cried into her shoulder for a moment as she rocked us back and forth, then kissed her shoulder. Alice loosened her grip just enough for me to bring myself around. And my lips found hers and this time they were real. They were Alice's. And they fit perfectly. We ended up having to break apart because I was still crying but I didn't care so long that her arms were around me. And they never left, even as I tried to calm myself against her shoulder.

Alice hushed me softly, her own voice wavering in the night as she nuzzled against me. I clawed at her back, longing to hold her tighter and yet knowing that she was barely using any strength with me at all. I kissed at her shoulder, her neck and collarbone and anywhere I could find, loving the feeling of her against me. After awhile I felt Alice shift and we were both lying on the bed. She pulled away from me, much to my disdain but I felt her hand reach into the pocket of my jacket, pulling out my cell phone. She flipped it open and the blue light filtered through the room. Alice placed it in between the two of us and I marveled at her beautiful face. She looked awe stricken at mine as well and she lifted her hand to gently caress my cheek.

"Oh, Bella, you are so beautiful," she whispered, as if she was frightened of her own voice. I laughed but did not blush as I told her the same and she smiled. "What are you doing here?" she asked slowly. I could still see the joy in her eyes, but also the concern.

"Rosalie came back, Alice." It was such a joy just to be able to say her name without my heart aching. "She came back and she told me about what happened. Alice, Edward lied." I watched as my pixie's brow furrowed and I nodded sadly. "I didn't say anything that he told you. I never wanted you to leave. I love you, Alice."

Alice's lips quivered as she formed a faint smile. Then she closed her eyes tightly and shook her head. "I'm such a fool," she mumbled, still shaking her head. I reached over, closing the cell phone as I did, and embraced her again. My lips found hers and I kissed her warmly, pleasantly surprised that she kissed me back. And I pulled away, whispering my love for her against her lips. Alice smiled and held my face in her hands.

"I love you too, Bella. And I will never, ever leave you again," she promised. There was a single nod of her head and I smiled, feeling fresh tears come to my eyes and then freeze. Alice brushed her hands across my face, feeling the ice against them and she furrowed her brow, sitting up and away from me.

"You're freezing," she said sadly as she recoiled. I shook my head and neared her again, glaring when she inched away from me.

"Alice, I've suffered months without you, endured Rosalie's death glare, travelled across the world and entered a village of non-vegetarian vampires just to see you. And now you're not going to let me hug you?"

"I…I don't want you to get too cold."

"Say, Alice, why don't you let me make a decision, okay?" I smiled at her but she knew that my words were serious and she smiled back hesitantly, falling into my arms again. I welcomed her and sighed again, breathing in the scent that never left her. "Besides, you're warm compared to this."

"I am?"

"You are." And she was. It wasn't my love talking, it was my body. And my body was telling me that she was warm, and that I should cling to her. Of course, I was okay with that. We laid there on the bed and talked for I don't know how long. I told her about Jacob and my bouts with Victoria. Alice told me exactly what Edward said, without Rosalie's bias and I was pleasantly surprised that Rosalie hadn't lied at all. For a moment I considered asking Alice about Edward in hopes that she would have some more concrete thoughts on the matter, but I didn't want him to ruin the moment. Edward, at this point, didn't even matter to me. Alice did. And she was here now. I smiled at her after a few minutes and reached out to her again, my thumb caressing the bags under her blackened eyes.

"How are you feeling?" I asked. She shrugged and inhaled deeply.

"I'm desiccated, to be honest. But I've no desire to hunt right now. I don't think we'll have to worry about that ever again."

"I was never worried."

Alice rolled her eyes and snuggled closer to me. If I was shivering or cold, I could hardly care to think about it. Alice hummed softly, whispering into my ear. "You know, when I was that lifeless droid, I didn't see anything. Everything was black around me. And I couldn't hear and didn't really feel the desire to breathe. And I wondered if this was what death was like, except for I would be without thought. I wanted to try it out and so I stopped thinking. And to be honest I thought I'd never come out of that void. Thank god you screamed."

"I wouldn't have let you stay like that," I murmured back to her, feeling her grip on me tighten.

"I know."

I sighed and looked out the window, noting that the sun was starting to rise. Just barely, but there was some light. Alice sat up and I followed suit, stretching. "Rosalie is waiting outside you said?" Alice asked. I nodded and stood from the bed to straighten my jacket. When I turned back around, Alice's eyes had glossed over. A wave of panic washed over me as I watched her. Part of me was convinced that she wouldn't wake up. That everything before was just a dream and I had merely lain with her corpse. But the other, more rational side, knew better, even if my heart rate wasn't showing it.

When her eyes returned to normal not a moment later, she gasped and ran out the door. I didn't even see her as she blurred past me but the minute I saw the open door I was outside, freezing and looking around for any sight of anything. I didn't have to look far and I almost ran into Alice. In fact, if I hadn't stopped in shock at what I saw, I would have run into Alice.

Just a few feet away, Rosalie was a blur on the ground, fighting with another vampire. Now that I was outside and focused I could hear their growls and snarls and the occasional hiss of pain. In the flurry of motion I saw red speckles and I gasped, my hand darting for Alice's. She held it tightly, looking on and leaning forward, then back, deciding if she could intervene. After a moment or two, the blurs stopped, and I could make out the fiery red head of Victoria. She had Rosalie pinned to the ground with her hands around her neck. I screamed and Alice's hand left mine as she darted forward. My scream had thrown Victoria off guard and Rosalie managed to get her knee up and into the redhead's chest, sending her back. The moment she was off of her, Rosalie turned and threw her hand out to Alice, stopping her in her tracks.

"Stop, Alice!" Rosalie shouted in a voice I'd never heard before. It terrified me and apparently struck a chord with Alice too, for she stood there, frozen in mid-step, staring at her sister. All this happened so quickly I was surprised I even noticed it. For the minute Rosalie told Alice to stop, she was gone, a blur again with the red tangled mass. Alice was by my side again and she held me close to her. And with her next to me I didn't feel as scared for myself. But I was aching for Rosalie. I wanted to help, I wanted Alice to help. I wanted the Cullens to come running from nowhere and spare me the agony of watching these blurs. A loud screech of pain was heard and I recognized Rosalie's voice.

"No," Alice whispered next to me and I looked up to see her eyes widening. "No," she said again, leaving my arms and running towards the two vampires. "Rosalie, no!" she shouted, loudly this time and it echoed over the nothingness, ringing in my ears as the blurring suddenly ceased.

Rosalie was on top of Victoria, a strange rusted crimson coating her chest. Victoria was struggling beneath her and I watched as Rosalie smiled the widest I'd ever seen. Even Alice in all over her superhuman speed couldn't reach them in time as Rosalie placed her hands on Victoria's neck, jerked back and tossed what was left of the redhead over her shoulder. Alice stopped short, watching as the head soared over her tiny stature. Then she fell to her knees in front of Rosalie, who looked down pithily at her before standing and examining her blouse. "Alice, do you have something to burn her with?" she asked professionally, pulling the shirt down to examine her damages. I noticed four long, deep slashes down the middle of her chest. They were healing right in front of my eyes, but it still hurt to see.

"Rosalie…Rosalie you shouldn't have done that," Alice whimpered, still looking over what was left of Victoria. "I mean, how did she even get here?"

"You know, I really didn't think to ask." Rosalie's tone was light, surprising for the words she just said and she brushed by me as she went into the cabin, looking me over and placing her hand on my shoulder. I felt its strength and chill and I shivered. Rosalie came back out of the cabin empty handed and looking rather irritated as she made her way over to her sister, who still hadn't moved.

"Do you know what you've done?" Alice asked as Rosalie stepped closer. The blonde did not answer as she took hold of Victoria's arm, pulled it off and tossed it as far as she could. "Are you listening to me? Do you know what you've done?" Alice was hysterical now and she jumped up only to have Rosalie turn around and grasp her by the shoulders.

"No, you listen to me, Alice! I've put up with a lot vexation for the past few months and that woman was on the top of my list! So forgive me, please, for killing her. Because I know you were just dying to have tea with the woman." In her shouting Rosalie had actually picked Alice up and when she finished, she gently set her back down, working on the other arm of Victoria and then her leg. Alice opened her mouth to speak again but was silenced as Rosalie shook her head.

"To answer your question: yes, I know what I've done. I'm prepared to face the consequences. You two should get out of here while you still can." I watched as Alice nodded, and then turned to me. I didn't like the expression on her face so I ran forward, careful not to spill on the sludge that had seeped out of Victoria.

"What's going on? What is she talking about?" I asked out of breath as Rosalie continued to mutilate Victoria beyond recognition. Alice swallowed and closed her eyes, reaching out for my hand, which I gave to her.

"It is against the law to kill a vampire in Sangvine. They're on their way and will be here within moments to take Rosalie and us away. We need to leave. Say goodbye to Rosalie."

"I-I…what?" I didn't understand her words. I didn't want to understand the dual meaning behind Alice's even tone. I didn't…Rosalie.

"They're going to kill me, Bella," Rosalie said evenly, standing and wiping her hands on her jeans. "You and Alice need to go. Now." She glared intently at me and I watched the crease form in her brow as I shook my head.

"No," I said, crossing my arms.

"Bella, this isn't the—

"No, Alice!" I shouted, turning to her. She appeared shocked by my words but I didn't care. "We can't leave Rosalie, Alice. We can't. She didn't leave me. You can go if you want, but I can't."

"Bella, I don't want you to stay," Rosalie countered.

"Well, forgive me, Rosalie, but I don't give a shit," I answered, watching the shock of my language fill her expression. "I started this with Alice and you helped be through the middle. We will see the end out together." I took Rosalie's bloodied hand in mine and turned to Alice, extending my other hand. It took less than a second for her to take my hand and she came forward, kissing me on the cheek. Then she lifted herself on her toes and Rosalie, having done this many times before, knelt down so that Alice could kiss her cheek as well. I smiled when Rosalie copied the action to Alice and squeezed their hands tightly.

"There less than fifteen seconds away," Alice declared, looking out towards where we had come. Rosalie and I followed her eyes to make out crimson blurs coming our way and coming fast. I felt my heartbeat racing and even though I was scared and knew I was going to die, I wouldn't have had it any other way than standing here, arm in arm with my girls.

"I love you both," Alice said as the blurs circled around us.

"Ditto," said Rosalie

"Me too," I said lastly as the blurs finally stopped.

There were four of them. Large, tall, pale men dressed in crimson cloaks. Their hoods were pulled above their heads and shielded their eyes from all of us. One of them stepped around us and examined Victoria. He spoke in Russian to one of his comrades, who went over beside him. The next thing I knew, the body was up in flames. It smelled terrible but I didn't dare make a face. When they were finished the two of them came over to me. In an instant my hood was torn down and my jacket ripped away.

"Chellovyek," he said to me slowly. I watched his red eyes as they searched me. Then he leaned forward and placed his nose on the top of my head, inhaling deeply. Alice stiffened next to me but did nothing else for one of the men was standing right in front of her. Another of the guards had come over and grasped Rosalie's arm. She didn't struggle and seemed impervious to the looks he was giving her. The man over my head finished inhaling and pulled back as if he'd just snorted a drug. His eyes rolled back into his head and he exhaled grandly.

"Otleechna," he said to me, snapping his teeth as he pretended to bite. One of his comrades chuckled, causing him to turn around.

"Nikolai, dolya," he laughed, seemingly amused by all of this.

The man known as Nikolai smirked before he opened his mouth and unleashed a chain of several more things I didn't understand. When he finished he looked me in the eye and I found that any Russian that Rosalie had taught me was long since gone. Thankfully, Alice came to my aid.

"Americanskaya, ne govoreet pa-rooski," she said almost obediently and the man looked me over again. He turned to Alice and started speaking quickly to her and she answered back just as fluently. Then they turned their attentions to Rosalie who also answered their questions. One of them that hadn't spoken grabbed a hold of my arm and another took Alice's as they turned us around to face the pyre that was still burning. Nikolai came around and gestured to the flames. He said something and his face which was once amused, turned into a dark grimace that I didn't like. To my left I saw Alice open her mouth, but Rosalie stopped her from speaking by stepping forward.

"Ya," she said simply before she gestured to the two of us and spoke to him very quickly. Alice tried to intervene several times but neither Rosalie nor the guards would have any of her butting in. She looked terrified and I could only follow suit. When Rosalie finally finished the guard asked her one simple question and she nodded. Alice hung her head and Rosalie looked down sadly at her, then to me. Nikolai nodded and spoke to the guards and before I knew it, I was jerked back around and being led back to Sangvine.


	30. Chapter 30

Focus

One of the guards had taken my jacket and he was holding it down by his side, allowing it to graze the frozen floor. Occasionally he would lift it up to his face and inhale deeply. Then he would turn around and smile me. I hated that smile because there was something behind it. Something I knew I hated. In spite of my hate, though I focused on that man. I focused on his red hood and the way he walked almost lethargically in front me. And I focused on the sounds of everyone's feet, Alice's quiet whimpers and Rosalie's occasional grunts of effort as she fought with the man holding her arm.

I focused on all of these things because if I didn't, I knew I would die. The layers of clothes I wore underneath my jacket were easily penetrated by the Siberian wind, which had started up again shortly after we began our journey. At first I thought I would be okay. I thought that the layers would keep me warm enough to at least make to wherever we were going. But only minutes after we started walking I could feel the sting in my arms. It burned all the way up my shoulders and down my torso and even across the back of my neck where I thought my hair would provide some protection. Thankfully, my legs were fairly comfortable, thanks to the ski pants Rosalie had told me to wear. My legs kept me moving and moving kept hypothermia at bay. Moving and thinking and focusing.

Alice had tried to reason with the guards. I could hear pleading but strange Russian tones as she spoke quickly and just as fluently as Rosalie had. But they paid her no mind and when Alice tried to reach for me, a guard grabbed her arm and twisted it behind her back so forcefully that she doubled over in pain. I'd spent the rest of my time focusing on trying to rid that image from my mind forever. The only person that didn't look absolutely devastated was Rosalie. But she did look pissed off beyond all reason. I watched her out of the corner of my eye as she continued to struggle against the guard that held her. She wasn't really trying hard it seemed, but she was doing enough to annoy the hell out of him and every once in a while he would spit out what I could only assume was Russian vulgarity, and Rosalie would smile just a bit.

Rosalie was a fighter. A fighter and a protector and I'd be lying if I said I didn't love that about her. Alice would smile at her from time to time as well and the look that passed between those two sisters was enviable. I never had a sibling but I imagine the love between one sibling to another as being very strong. Especially now, seeing how Alice and Rosalie could communicate with each other on looks alone. And then Alice would look at me and somehow in all of this she would manage a smile. And it was in those smiles that I realized why Rosalie called Alice a beacon of hope. Because when the girl smiled like that, nothing else really mattered.

My foot caught on something and I was sent tumbling to the ground. No one was holding onto me because I didn't have a chance, so there was no one to catch my fall. I slid on the hard ground and felt an aching in my elbow, but thankfully no blood. And then I realized just how good it felt to be lying down. The ground was warm and down here I could hardly feel the wind as it blistered my skin. I smiled, looking up at Alice who was fighting with her guard to try and get to me. The Regentoi stood over me, seemingly confused and I smiled up at them as well. I was so tired. And so warm. Maybe all that I needed was to sleep and all of this would go away.

Rosalie let out a growl and I lifted my head to see her get one arm free from her guard. She used it to fling it towards me and shouted at the guards in English. "She's dying! She can't survive this weather without that jacket, you idiot! Put it on her or that blood that smells so good to you will freeze!" The guard holding my jacket turned around to face Rosalie, who had since been restrained again. He got right up into her face and looked her over for a moment. Then he lifted his hand, made a fist, and brought it roughly against her perfect cheek. Rosalie let out grunt of pain and her head fell forward. I screamed, jumping from my daze warily and trying to make my way over to her. Someone grabbed a hold of me and even though it was useless I tried to fight his grip. Alice was also fighting and she managed to get her teeth on her guard's hand, resulting in a yelp of pain.

There was a blur and suddenly the guard with my jacket, Nikolai, was standing in front of Alice, his hands placed on either side of her face. "Do…not…struggle," he said with a thick accent. "I will kill you easily."

"You can't kill me," Alice returned. "Not yet." Then she said something in Russian and Nikolai's hands fell from her face. He glared at her for a moment, and then slapped her roughly across the face. My knees went weak but this time someone was holding on to me. Alice's face shot to the left from his force and he grabbed her chin quickly, yanking it back to meet his eyes.

"No, I cannot kill you. But I can hurt you. And I can hurt her," he gestured to Rosalie, "and her," he gestured to me. "And it would be wise if you both behaved so that I can save my energy, da?" Alice made no response but the look in her eyes answered him and he jerked her head away, wiping his hand on his robe as if he'd touched something foul. Then he made his way over to me and looked down at me, cocking his head to the side. He reached out and touched my cheek, leaving his hand there for a moment before he drew back with a nod. Slowly, my jacket was extended out to me. I took it as best as I could with frozen hands and put it on. The zipper provided no help and I felt tears in my eyes as my numbed fingers brushed drunkenly over the device.

Large hands came out and slapped my own away. I looked down lazily as they fastened the zipper and brought it up until it rested underneath my chin. Nikolai smiled at me and then leaned over my head again, inhaling. I shivered underneath him and he pulled away with a grin. "Cannot have you dying on us yet, chellovyek. Keep moving, da?" I felt dizzy and could only nod my head. Nikolai returned the nod and leaned in again. This time he pressed his nose to my neck, right on the pulse point. I heard Alice and Rosalie growl and Nikolai shot up, placing his hands around my neck.

"Do you have something to say?" he asked angrily and I felt his grip tighten ever so slightly on my throat. I looked to Alice and Rosalie and managed to shake my head at them. The both looked deeply into my eyes and said nothing and Nikolai huffed his disapproval before he went back to my neck. He breathed for a long time as I stood and shivered next to him, feeling the guard's grip on my arm. After awhile he started nuzzling and I could feel his lips on my neck, tracing up and down the column. I closed my eyes because I didn't want to see Alice's expression. And I wanted to ignore the tingle that kept rising up my body.

The guard that was holding onto me finally said something and Nikolai jerked back. They argued in Russian for a moment but both points seemed to be made as Nikolai and my guard drew back from each other. Nikolai's eyes were a deep, deep red and I tried not to look at them as he headed over to Rosalie and lifted her head up gently. She glared at him and even from my distance I could hear the growl rumbling through her throat. Nikolai smiled at her and ran his hand over her cheek, the same one that he'd punched.

"Kraceevoi," he said slowly and with an airy tone. "Ochen kraceevoi." His hand travelled up and down her cheek as she closed her eyes. Alice looked away, breathing heavily and I watched as his hand travelled down her neck and across her chest to rest on the zipper of her vest. My eyes widened and I looked up at my guard who paid me no mind, hoping that someone would intervene. Alice began struggling against her guard's grip but it was to no avail and he smiled down at her as if she was toying with him.

Nikolai pulled the zipper of her vest down and it fell open, revealing the entirety of the turtleneck she wore. I shivered and looked away as he brought his hand across her chest, bringing it down slowly until it brushed the hem of her shirt. Rosalie had opened her eyes since then I could see that while she was glaring at Nikolai, her eyes never leaving his, that they were glossed over. I felt tears in my eyes as Nikolai's hand went up her shirt and caressed her stomach in small circles. Rosalie struggled at that, snarling in Nikolai's face and I let one of my sobs escape, causing everyone to look at me.

Nikolai looked over and I could see his eyes as they roamed my face and studied the frozen tears that had collected there. Then he looked to Alice who was still fighting and smiled at her before he turned back to Rosalie. "You are very beautiful. But also, you are a hassle." Nikolai placed one hand on Rosalie's shoulder and brought the other to rest on the back of her head. He smiled sweetly at her, and then lunged his head forward, cracking it against Rosalie's forehead. I screamed again and Rosalie made no sound but her head fell forward and her legs gave. Her eyes were closed but I didn't know if she was unconscious or not. I didn't know if vampires could be unconscious. But I could tell that she was in pain and I shook my head at Nikolai as he lifted Rosalie up and threw her over his shoulder like a sack of trash.

"You're a monster," Alice said, her voice choking on the words as they retched from her mouth. Nikolai turned around and walked over to her, crouching so that he could be eye level with her.

"Nyet, nyet, malenkaya feya," he said, speaking to her as if she was a child. "I am a vampire. You," he smiled and shrugged his shoulder, causing Rosalie to bounce, "you are the monsters here." He gave Alice a look that dared her to continue and she hung her head, her shoulders heaving. Nikolai nodded, both proud and annoyed at the same time and then turned around. He shouted something to the guards and led the way through the monochrome once again.

The rest of the walk was silent and I couldn't seem to tear my eyes from Rosalie as she dangled helplessly over Nikolai's shoulder. Occasionally as we walked he would flip her over and give her a look and every time that I could see, she looked unconscious. Then Nikolai would smile to himself and throw her back over his shoulder, running his hands up and down the backs of her thighs as he walked. It pained me to see Rosalie in such a state and looking back at Alice, it pained her as well. She would not look at me and instead kept her eyes to the floor. I could tell she was thinking deeply about something but the guards would not permit us to talk to one another.

When we reached the city limits of Sangvine, Nikolai called to someone over his shoulder. The guard that was previously holding Rosalie nodded and came over to me, taking one of my arms. Two guards were by my side and now they wouldn't even permit me to look back at Alice.

The buildings were made of a hard material and they stood tall and foreboding over me as I passed. I looked up ahead and noticed the large tower with the ever burning purple-like smoke pouring from the top and shivered. I knew that was where we were headed. The further that we drove into the city the more vampires I saw. And then it was all too clear as to why I had two escorts. The vampires were gaunt, ghostly looking as they passed me. And while they were all very attractive, they looked sickly. I wondered just how often these…people, were allowed to eat. Judging by how closely they came to me, it wasn't enough. I began to shake as my escorts growled and hissed and shoved at anyone who got too close. Alice appeared to helping them from behind but I couldn't turn around and see.

The tower was coming closer now and I could see the bright crimson double doors of it. A crowd had gathered in front of the doors. Hoards of vampires were standing still as stone or rocking back and forth, not even noticing me as I came nearer. Standing in front of them were two guards and their focus was directed on us. One of them waved to Nikolai and shouted something. Nikolai shouted back and instead of heading towards the doors, we started heading left, around the side of the tower. The vampires looked hungrily my way but didn't dare move from their spots. Then I heard the sound of the large doors opening. The crowd of vampires began inching their way towards the opening, a certain humming growl filling the area.

From inside the darkness of the doors a handful of Regentoi guards emerged. They were holding a massive, heavy looking tarp. The vampires continued to inch closer and the guards started swinging the tarp back and forth. "Bella, Bella, don't look!" Alice called from behind me before she was silenced. I knew I shouldn't. I wanted to look away, but I just couldn't. The Regentoi sounded like they were counting now and when they reached three the tarp was released from their hands and thrown into the center of the vampires. I could see it clearly, the blood raining down on the vampires as the tarp landed. Five or six bodies laid on the tarp, their forms emaciated and contorted into violent shapes. Their eyes were hollow and held a fear in them that did not cease in death. And that was all I saw before the vampires attacked, lunging at the bodies in hopes for a few drops of blood.

I should have been shaking, quivering, sobbing…something. I should have been doing something. But I couldn't bring myself to. I just didn't feel like I had been these past few days. Maybe all of this was taking its toll on me. Or maybe I was in shock. Either way, it felt good to not feel for everyone and everything. At least for just a little while.

Nikolai led us around the tower and knocked twice on the hard metal door. A small rectangle of metal was pushed sideways as someone looked through. I could hear them inhaling even from how far back I was and I winced as the door was thrust open, scraping on the ground as it did so. Once we were inside and out of the wind I felt my body attempting to heat itself up and a strange feeling entered my cheeks. However it wasn't much warmer than outside. But I knew that from the beginning even if my body didn't. The hallways were dark, lit only by scattered torches along the walls. There were no pictures or ornate designs. It was just cold and black.

After we turned a second corner, Nikolai veered right with Rosalie still on his shoulder. He shouted something to other guards and we were suddenly taken left. Alice was muttering something behind me and there was a sharp slapping sound, then she was silenced again. I tried to turn around to see where Nikolai was headed with Rosalie, fear pounding in my chest, but the guards would still not let me look around. I wanted to scream and shout for her, for Alice, but my vocal chords simply weren't working. So I walked silently with the guards, somewhat praying that I would wake up soon.

I don't know how long we had been walking but my thoughts were suddenly taken from me as there was another shrill sound of a door opening. I couldn't see inside the room that the guards had opened but I could feel cold air seeping out of it. The guards let me go and shortly after I felt one of them shove my shoulder. It hurt, stung, actually and I winced as I walked slowly into the dark room. I had thought that as soon as I stepped in, the door would shut behind me, but it didn't. So I turned around and in the dim light from the hallway watched as Alice was brought forward. She looked up at me and tried to smile but before she could, the guard heaved her up and threw her into the room.

Even with her grace she still couldn't catch herself and I gasped as I heard the sound of her smacking against the wall. It was like two rocks colliding and I turned to the guards, only to watch as the metal door closed and locked.

And then it was very dark. The only light came from a window about three feet over my head. It was merely a hole in the wall, carved out of whatever this tower was made of. I looked up at it and regarded how small it was. Alice could probably only fit her hand through it.

Alice.

"Alice?" I called, trying to find my way around the dark room. I didn't hear anything at first and I started to panic, heading towards where I thought she'd hit the wall. "Alice?" I called again, more fervently. Then I heard her breathing. And there was the shuffling of feet on the cold stone floor. In the next instant I felt her collide with me, holding me up in her strong arms. I put my arms around her and felt my legs giving. Her scent was still strong and I buried my nose in her hair, inhaling deeply.

And then I couldn't take it anymore. I started crying. I started crying and I couldn't stop. And Alice didn't try to stop me. She merely held me close to her, whispering things that didn't make sense into my ear. I don't know how long I cried but I do know that at some point I ran out of tears. And my chest was heaving and my lungs were burning from the cold air and from my sporadic breathing. Alice held me all the while and when I had calmed down a bit, she pulled away and kissed me tenderly on the cheek.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," she whispered, her lips brushing against my cheek as she spoke. "I'm…I'm so sorry for all of this. All that I've caused…Rosalie…. You shouldn't be here and I'm, god I'm such a fucking idiot." Alice tore away from my arms then and I heard the sound of rocks smashing together again. My eyes were barely adjusted but I could just make out the outline of her slamming her head against the wall. Alice's words about being in an insane asylum came flooding back to me and I tried to push them out of my mind as I went over to her, pulling her into my arms. She tried to fight against me but didn't use all of her strength and I held her as tightly as I could, the both of us sinking to the floor.

"It's okay, Alice," I said softly, looking up at the tiny hole of light. Alice shuffled next to me and I could feel her shaking her head.

"No, it's not. We're all going to die, Bella! Rosalie's…Rosalie's been taken for questioning and who knows what they're going to do to her! I should have never come here. I should have…" She stopped then, her words drifting into a violently quick mumble that I didn't understand. I held her tightly, trying to think of what to say. But I couldn't find the words.

Because a lot of this was Alice's fault. Edward played a big part in it but ultimately, it was her choice. I clenched my teeth together, shaking my head as I bent down and kissed the top of my pixie's head. I was angry at her. I was very angry at her. But I still loved her. And I didn't want to see her like this. After all, just as it had been her choice to come here, it was my choice to follow. And it was my fault that we were in all of this.

"You know what?" I said softly, feeling Alice's head raise in interest. "Who gives a shit about whose fault it is?" Alice looked up and I could just make out the curves of her eyes as she looked into mine, confused. I nodded, making a face at her. "Seriously, we're here. And that's all that we should worry about now, right? Alice, I don't want to be mad at you. I don't want you to be mad at me. I want the two of us to figure out a way out of this mess." I leaned forward and pressed my lips against hers. Rather, to the side of her lips. Alice quickly corrected it and she pulled back, nodding as she did so.

"I don't think we're going to get out of this, Bella," she said softly. "I haven't seen anything. I've just seen Rosalie. She's being questioned…and so far she's made the decision not to tell them anything." Alice fell towards me again and wrapped her arms around me, crying as best as a vampire could muster into my shoulder. I held her tightly and we rocked back and forth. "Bella, she's going to be beaten, tortured. But I can't see anything. Oh god I can't see anything," Alice shouted, the sound making my ears ring. I shook my head, trying desperately not to imagine what was happening to Rosalie, and lifted Alice's head up.

"Why don't you stop looking?" I whispered. Alice didn't answer me but merely looked away, bringing her knees to her chest and resting her chin on them. I tried to open my mouth to say something but there was a sudden uproar of sound. Both Alice and I looked up to the tiny window and watched as the light diminished. Hands were trying to climb through the small hole, fighting and pushing each other for entrance. They were shouting in Russian and I watched as they tried to tear at the wall.

"They can smell you," Alice whispered, taking my arm and dragging me back to the farthest corner of the room. It was pitch black now, thanks to the hands and I held tightly onto Alice as she did to me, listening and watching the hands as they mauled at the wall, which did not give way to them. My cell phone was still in my pocket and I pulled it out, opening the screen to reveal a small blue light. I set it between us and looked up again.

"What are they saying?" I whispered to Alice. She looked up at me and then looked at the wall.

"They're talking in circles. They're…positively rabid for your blood. I can't imagine how malnourished these vampires are." Alice shook her head and I looked over at her, pulling my hair onto one side.

"Alice, Alice, if you changed me, then this will all be over with," I said slowly, inching towards her. Alice looked at me, her eyes going wide and she shook her head, scooting back from me as she did so.

"No, Bella. Transformations take weeks. Weeks of the worst pain imaginable. Followed by a hunger compared to the townsfolk out there. It would solve nothing. They'd just kill you anyway."

"It would solve nothing? Alice, I would get to be with you forever!"

"I know, Bella. I know. It's just…this is a very big decision."

"Yeah, well I'm ready to make it! I want to be a vampire Alice!" I shouted, growing angry. Alice pursed her lips and scooted closer to me. She brought her hand around my head and pulled it closer to hers to where our foreheads were resting together.

"Bella, let's not talk about this now. If we make it through today, I promise you we'll talk about changing you. Okay?"

I frowned, knowing that she was right. Just as I was about to tell her so, she jerked her head to the left and crept in front of me, her arm cast out as if she was protecting me from someone. "People are coming," she whispered, motioning for me to turn my cell phone off. I grabbed it and thrust it into my pocket, feeling my heart race as the metal door screeched open and a slew of vampires were thrown inside.


	31. Chapter 31

The Regentoi

There were the sounds of shuffling and Alice growled. At least, I hoped it was Alice. It was too dark to make out anything but some movement in the darkness. Outside the vampires still roared and clawed at the unrelenting hole. My heart began to race and the room suddenly filled with murmurs. They were too fast for me to hear and yet I still tried to decipher them. One of the vampires stepped forward and I could hear Alice standing up and the murmuring grew angrier from what I could tell. The hands retreated from the hole for just an instant and the light that came through caught on a vampire's goldenly coiffed hair.

"Carlisle?" I gasped, finding my legs and standing up. The murmuring stopped and I could just make out Alice's head turning towards me.

"Yes, Bella, it's us," Carlisle said, taking a step forward. Alice jerked her heafd back around and gently placed her hand on the doctor's shoulder. I pulled out my cell phone and flipped it open, shining the light around the room. A few of the other vampires had cell phones too and they took my lead, pulling them out and opening the small lights. Carlisle, Emmett, Esme and Edward were all standing at the far end of the wall. Well, Carlisle had moved and was now just a few feet away from me. I smiled at him but he did not return it. Instead he looked down to Alice and the hand that she'd placed on his shoulder.

"You haven't fed in a long time, Carlisle. And yes, I'm well aware of who you are, but I just can't take the risk of any of us getting too close," Alice said sadly. I stepped to the side to get a better look at her face and saw just how ashamed she looked at having to do this. It made the blood in my veins all the more prevalent and I cursed it silently as Carlisle sighed, placing his hand on top of Alice's.

"If you think that's best," he replied simply, looking my way. "Though, Bella, I would advise that you keep moving to prevent hypothermia from setting in. If you wouldn't mind pacing back and forth or jumping or something, it would relieve me greatly." I smiled at him and shone the light on the floor, walking to one side of the room and then the other. Carlisle seemed to smile then when I looked up at him and then he looked down to Alice.

"Carlisle, what happened? How did they find you? I thought you would have run," Alice said, looking over to Esme, who smiled.

"We weren't going to leave you all. You should have known that, Alice," Esme said, stepping forward. "We were just a few miles out of town, listening to what was happening as best as we could. And when…well, when Rosalie made her decision, we headed back to town." Alice nodded almost sadly and opened her mouth to speak, but someone beat her to it.

"Bella?" Emmett asked, his voice coming across the room weakly. I looked over at him as I continued walking and saw that he was leaning against the wall, gripping it as if he thought he could bend it. "Bella, where's Rose? Is she okay?" I sighed, looking to Alice who seemed to meet the dejection in my eyes with her own.

"The Regentoi took her somewhere else. Alice said that she was going to be questioned."

There was a tremendous crash, so loud and powerful that even the teeming vampires outside receded momentarily from the hole. The entire room shook and I felt Alice at my side, with her arms around me. I held onto her tightly and looked over to Emmett. He was turned, facing the wall and his hands, which were clenched into fists, rested on the stone wall, which did not give even under his impressive strength. He was breathing deeply and Esme went over to him, putting her arm around his shoulders. She began whispering into his ear and I watched as his hands fell to his side and he fell into his mother's arms, holding her tightly as his chest heaved. It was both beautiful and heartbreaking to see and I turned away, hiding my eyes in Alice's shoulder. We all seemed to stand there for a few minutes, taking precious time to cope with all that was happening. It wasn't until Edward spoke that I lifted my head.

"Alice is right. We should have left when we had the chance," he said coldly, his eyes staring right into mine as he said it. Emmett growled and turned to his brother, his broad shoulders heaving with rage.

"I'm not leaving Rosalie. You could have gone if you wanted to."

"And leave my family?"

"Yeah, well we don't seem all that important to you now. Now that your pretty little hair is at stake," Emmett said, stepping towards Edward. Carlisle stepped to Edward's side and pushed him back as Esme placed her hand on Emmett's shoulder.

"Boys, stop it. There's no time for this," she chided.

"Time? Esme, we've got nothing but time! Let's get all of our rage out before we're sent to our deaths, shall we?" Edward shouted, attempting to lunge at Emmett. Carlisle pushed him back again and slammed his son into the wall. The sound wasn't as loud as Emmett's but still impactful and I gasped as I watched Carlisle in a brand new and dark light.

"Like we're a bunch of caged animals? I raised you better than this, Edward! If there's a problem, we'll talk about it. We will not fight." His voice was a callous grumble and I trembled in Alice's grasp. The entire family seemed to be taken off guard by his actions. Emmett no longer looked like he wanted to fight and he simply watched wide-eyed as Carlisle pinned his son against the wall. Edward struggled against the doctor's hands for a moment before went limp, nodding slowly. Carlisle returned his nod and let Edward slowly fall to the floor. "I'm sorry, son," he said sincerely. "I just…I can't bear to be in this place filled with darkness and see my family succumb to it." He looked away then, his eyes darting up to the small hole in the wall where the vampires still clawed.

I felt Alice pull away from my side and in a moment she was by Carlisle's side. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly. Emmett also came forward and placed his hand on Carlisle's shoulder. Esme just smiled at him and I looked away. It didn't seem like something I should have been witness to. When I heard them pull away I looked back up and noticed Carlisle eyeing Edward again. But Edward wasn't looking at him. Rather, he was staring at Alice, who stood tall in front of him.

"Edward? Alice? What's going on with you too?" Esme asked. But her question went unanswered as they continued to stare each other down. Carlisle looked over at me and I gulped, resuming my walking but keeping my eyes on the far side of the cell. Alice was breathing heavily and her eyes scanned Edward's face intently. He was expressionless with the exception of the brooding glare on his face. I couldn't read his eyes. After a moment he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Edward, is all of that true?" Alice asked, and I realized she was allowing him to read her mind. Edward opened his eyes and looked pleadingly at her.

"Alice, please, you have to understand—

Edward was cut off then as Alice slapped him across the face. Esme gasped and shouted Alice's name in disgust but Alice didn't seem to have heard her. Edward's head turned sharply at the blow and he hissed. When he swung his head back around his eyes were burning and he growled a bit.

"I don't have to understand anything more than you lied to me. You lied to me and ruined…ruined so many things," she whispered sadly. "I trusted you, Edward. I trusted my brother. And I was stupid to do so." Alice shook her head and the room fell silent. I couldn't even hear the sounds of the vampires outside anymore. Maybe they had stopped to listen as well. Edward pursed his lips and ran his hands through his hair.

"Alice, what are you talking about?" Esme asked, the tone of her voice telling the vampire that she had better answer her this time. Alice looked sadly over to her and gestured to Edward.

"Edward lied when he told me about Bella and what she said. Bella never said those things. We're all here because of his lies." Esme gasped and Emmett stood just a bit taller. Carlisle looked his son over and rubbed his face with his hands. Edward looked around the room and shook his head.

"Edward, why would you do such a thing?" Esme asked, stepping towards her son. Edward stepped away from her and she stopped, choosing to look at the floor.

"You just don't understand," he murmured so low that I was surprised I heard it. Alice looked up at him and laughed morosely, her shoulders shaking with the effort.

"Then, please, enlighten me," she said. I could tell that she was mocking him, but I could also tell that there was something else in her voice. Something that wanted to hear him out, wanted to believe him and see that his intentions were good. I couldn't help but smile at Alice then and wish I had her unique aplomb. Edward licked his lips and his eyes darted from me to Alice. The pixie raised her eyebrow at him, signaling him of her impatience and he sighed.

"Alice, I've been alone for so long. And then she came along and I still can't read her thoughts and there was just…something captivating about her. You know what I'm talking about. And I wanted her. I still want her. But I can't. And you can't. This is all wrong. I was just trying to protect you, protect her. This cannot be. The fact that we're here proves that."

"No, the fact that we're here proves that you're a liar! It wasn't your decision, Edward! And now, god, now we're just getting redundant about all of this." Alice laughed almost crazily and threw her hands in the air. "You were talking about being alone, Edward, but what about me? Don't I have a right to happiness? A right to have choices for my happiness? Doesn't Bella? Did you ever think of that?" Edward didn't answer and Alice scoffed, shaking her head. "No, of course you didn't. You only thought of yourself."

"Now let's everyone calm down," Esme tried, her voice wavering over the walls. Her eyes met mine and we must have shared the same expression for she looked like she took some comfort in it. I smiled at her as best as I could allow and she returned it, placing her hand on Alice's head. "Alice, go on over to Bella. Walk with her. We'll keep our distance like you asked. Everyone needs to calm down." Alice opened her mouth to retaliate but I beat her to it, calling her over to me. Alice looked back at me and then looked to Edward before coming back over to me. She took my hand in hers and we paced back and forth, keeping the hypothermia at bay while the rest of the family murmured quietly to themselves.

"I'm sorry," Alice said again after awhile. I looked over at her and her shoulders sank. "I know we're not supposed to be doing the blame game but if I'd just—

I didn't want to hear it. So I silenced her by placing her lips to mine. They were just as frosty as always and made me shiver, but it shut her up and pleased the both of us and Alice nodded when I pulled away, saying no more. We walked in silence again and in the silence my thoughts drifted to my father and mother. I couldn't remember the last time I'd called my mother. I wondered if Phil got drafted and pondered the effects what would have happened if Charlie hadn't found my note. My eyes watered at the thought of him sitting alone at the kitchen table, uneaten pizza in front of him and three cans of finished beer. It hurt me to think about but in this moment, I couldn't think of anything pleasant to take my mind off of it. Alice must have sensed my anguish for she wrapped her arms around me and nuzzled her cheek against mine.

"You might not be able to believe it now, seeing me so balletic all of the time. But when I was a newborn, I fell out of a tree."

Against all of my dreadful thoughts, I managed a laugh. Alice falling in general was funny but falling out of a tree…that was just impossible. Alice giggled in my ear and nodded. "It's true. I fell straight out of a tree and did not land on my feet. Rather, I landed on my back. It actually knocked the air out of me. Thank goodness I didn't really need it. You want to know why I fell out of a tree?" Alice looked to me and then looked to the rest of the family who appeared to have taken an interest in the conversation. Even Emmett was smiling a little, though his eyes were still saddened.

"I fell out of a tree… because I got scared by a bird."

I laughed again and this time I was not alone as a few other chortles and giggles followed. Alice's eyes brightened and she straightened up, looking around at her audience. "There I was, poised and everything on this tiny tree branch, looking out for some game to drink. And I'm standing there and my thoughts start drifting. I got one of those dreadful feelings that everyone gets sometimes and I lost my train of thought. Well, right about that time, a bird lands on the branch right in front of my face. I smell it, of course, and open my eyes. And apparently that scared the little thing for he screamed, or whatever birds do, and fluttered his wings in my face." Alice made the motions of the bird and then her frightened face as she threw herself down on the floor.

"I screamed. I screamed like a little baby and I fell out of that tree and I landed on my back. And once I got my breath back, I just laughed and laughed," Alice said, laughing at the memory. The rest of us were too and as I looked over, even Edward had the tiniest of smirks on his face. It was pleasant. Everyone, despite all that was happening, was still able to laugh. Especially little Alice, holding her sides on the floor of this prison. I fell down near her and she smiled up at me, lifting her head to meet my lips. We kissed deeply as the laughter slowly subsided and just when I was about to forget where I was, Alice pulled away.

She stood up and looked to Edward, who seemed to nod in confirmation. Alice looked to me and helped me up, holding my hand tightly. Then she looked to the rest of the family and gestured towards the door. "They're coming for us," she said in a low voice and I felt my heartbeat speeding up. The family looked at the door and seemed to brace themselves as the grip on my hand tightened. As predicted, footsteps could be heard walking towards us. I swallowed hard and Alice turned around to face me. Kissed me once more, lingering just a bit and managed to smile as she pulled away. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I said, surprised at the confidence in my voice. Alice smiled and said the same to her family who all returned it as the door was pushed open. Light filled the room from outside and while it wasn't particularly bright, it still stung my eyes a bit as the crimson coats glided in. The guards said a few things in Russian and I didn't look for translation from anyone. They didn't seem to matter now. Carlisle responded and I felt Alice's hand leaving mine, a firm grip being bestowed upon my shoulder. I winced in pain, surprised when the hand actually eased, and looked up at the guard. He looked strangely at me, like he didn't know what to do with me and that notion didn't seem so out of the question. More Russian was spoken and I watched as each Cullen was now in the hands of a guard. One by one they led us out of the room. I watched them all go, praying that we were all going to the same place. I didn't want this to be the last time I saw them.

Alice was second to the last to go and she looked back at me as they led her away. Our eyes met and she managed a smile before she was jerked back into facing the front. Then it was my turn to move and I found my legs as I followed Alice down the hall. There were a row of red cloaks in front of me and I sighed in relief at the fact that we were all going to the same place for now. The guards led us up a long flight of stairs and down a few more hallways before it finally seemed like we were getting somewhere. I could hear the murmuring of voices and a series of growls and it made me tremble but somehow I kept walking. Whoever was at the front of the line stopped for a moment and I watched as a large, previously hidden door was pulled open. It was made of the same stone as the tower and was at least 20 feet high. I looked up at it as the line started moving again. The voices grew louder for a moment and then ceased altogether as I passed through the door.

The room was large and vastly empty. It was also the most well lit room I'd yet to see. I looked up and squinted as I came across a large, large window. Rather, it was just another whole in the wall. There wasn't any glass in it and I wondered what these vampires did when a snowstorm came. They probably enjoyed it and I shivered as the cold pelted its way through my coat. At the other end of the room, atop about five steps, were two chairs with two men sitting in them. Judging by the size of the first chair, it was more appropriate to call it a throne. It was large and the same crimson color and appeared to be made out of the same black stone as the tower. Sitting in that chair was a man who looked to be about fifty years old. It must have been Kirill, the leader. He was a good looking man with salt and pepper hair and bright red eyes. As we got closer to him, I realized that there was something off with his skin. It looked papery and almost translucent. I wondered if this was because of his age.

Next to him, in a smaller throne must have been Taras. His skin was just faintly papery and he had dark brown hair that was pulled back into a ponytail. He looked down at me with his uni-brow furrowed and I gulped as I was led nearer. The guards had lined us up in a line in front of the two vampires and as we stood with them towering over us, I watched as their eyes roved us over. Taras inhaled loudly and said something in Russian to Kirill who nodded. I thought I could hear Alice growl next to be but I couldn't be certain. Kirill then silenced whatever noise there was in the room by clapping his hands together. The sound stung my ears but I made no reaction to it and started bending my knees, remembering Carlisle's words to keep moving. Kirill eyed me strangely but then turned his gaze to Carlisle. He said something to him and after a moment's thought, I realized that I knew what it meant. He asked Carlisle what language he would prefer.

"Angleeski," Carlisle answered and Kirill nodded, clasping his hands together.

"Very well," he said in a perfect English accent that I shouldn't have been surprised with. "What is your name?"

"Carlisle Cullen,"

"Where do you currently reside?"

"Here in Sangvine."

Kirill grimaced; a most terrifying expression and I could see from my peripheral as Taras gripped the side of his chair. "You do not reside here," Kirill said slowly, anger seeping from his smooth voice. "Yes, we have noticed your presence. Rather, lack of presence. We noticed that you and your family do not come to feed when there is food to be offered. Do you not like our hospitality?"

"We were still learning the rules. We did not mean any offense, sir."

"Ah, then perhaps you are thirsty, yes? Shall I fetch you something to drink?" Kirill asked. Carlisle opened his mouth to protest but Kirill silenced him with his hand, lifting his finger and pointing it at a guard that stood by the door. The guard gave a single nod and disappeared for a moment, returning with a large parcel. He brought it in and placed it in front of Carlisle and it was only when it hit the ground and moved afterward that I realized what was in the parcel was alive. The Cullens' eyes widened and I watched as they tried to hide their nerves. Kirill stepped down the stairs and smiled at Carlisle before he knelt before the package. He untied the rope that held the wrapping together and when the sides of the package fell, I couldn't help but gasp.

A woman, bound and naked was now writhing on the floor. She was gagged and she looked up at Carlisle with pleading eyes. I looked at the bruises on her body and noticed the blackness of her toes and finger and nose. Frostbite. I suddenly began to feel very nauseous and had to look away as Kirill chuckled. He reached down and stroked the woman's hear and she trembled underneath his touch. He mumbled something in Russian and turned the woman on her back. Tears were streaming down her face and I watched as Kirill lifted his hand, exposing to me for the first time his very long nails. He trailed his hand down the woman's stomach once before he placed his nail on the skin in between her breasts. Slowly and thoughtfully he dragged his nail down, and the blood red line that appeared after his nail made me certain that I was going to vomit.

The woman screamed, but it was muffled due to the gag and Kirill didn't stop cutting her until he had sliced past her bellybutton. Then he lifted his long and grotesque nail and brought it to his mouth, sucking emphatically on it. "Ah, she tastes divine, Carlisle. Please, you and your family dig in. There's no harm done. We are hospitable. We share." Kirill stood and I looked over at Carlisle, who was staring down at the woman. All of the Cullens were, even Alice, and I couldn't think of anything to pull them away from the blood. Emmett was leaning closer and closer and Esme had fallen to her knees. Edward had his head turned away but he was close to losing it. My breathing started to increase and I watched as Kirill stole another glance at me.

Carlisle had taken a step forward now, and I could hear the vampires' chests rumbling with thirst. All of their eyes were pitch black and I looked to Carlisle. He was doing much better than everyone else, but I didn't know how long it would last. Esme had reached the woman in her crawling and she extended her hand out, tracing a single finger over the blood that was pooling over the woman's stomach. My legs were starting to fail me and I let out a whimper of emotion as I fell to the floor. Carlisle's head darted over to mine, as did Alice's. They looked at me and, amazingly, stepped back.

"No," said evenly, bending down to pull his wife away. Esme had the blood on her hand and she was drawing it closer to her mouth, but he put it down and wiped it on the cold stone floor. Alice was by Emmett's side, whispering into his ear and while he still was on the ground, he had stopped progressing. I looked over at them, more than relieved, and then noticed Kirill's eyes on me again. I didn't like the way he was looking at me but it only lasted for a moment as he ordered to one of the guards in Russian. The guard nodded and swooped in to pick up the bleeding woman. He moved past us and I turned around, watching as he headed over to the giant window and tossed her out. The woman's muffled screams were heard and then the sounds of a terrifying crack. I winced and clenched my eyes shut as the roar of the vampires feasting down below filled my ears.

"Most impressive," Kirill said, breaking me from thoughts of the woman. He looked to Carlisle and then to Alice, then to me. "How do you manage this?" He looked to Carlisle but there was no answer. He went down the row of vampires, asking the question with his eyes and when none of them answered his eyes fell upon me. "It's because of her, isn't it? What is so special about this human?"

No one answered again Kirill closed his eyes, looking to his brother, Taras, who nodded. "It would seem that civility has failed you. What has also failed you is your chance of all of you making it out of here alive. You are aware of the rules here in Sangvine, are you not?"

Carlisle nodded slowly and Kirill mimicked it. "Not only have you brought a human into this town, this sacred town, but you have also spilled the blood of your brethren. The punishment for this crime is death. An eye for an eye, a vampire for a vampire, a human for food." He looked to me and rubbed his hands together.

"Now, we have one of yours in our care. We have reason to believe that she is connected with you. She was in the process of being questioned, but it appears that she has a strong will. Perhaps she will tell us what you won't now that there is a bargaining chip, yes?" Kirill again looked to me and clapped his hands and from behind us I heard a door opening. I tried to turn around and see but the guard jerked my head forward. I could hear the sound of footsteps and down the line, Edward grimaced in traumatic empathy.

"Ah, the most beautiful one," Kirill said as the two guards came before us. At first, all I could see were the guards and their red cloaks. But as they rounded around the line, I saw that Rosalie was in their possession. I gasped and instinctively lunged out to her, as did Alice and Esme, but we were easily detained. Emmett roared furiously and began struggling so defiantly that it took two more guards to subdue him and his anger. And he had a right to be angry.

Rosalie stood in front of us, beaten and stripped of her clothes. I could see fresh claw and bite marks littering her bare and once pristine body and it looked as if there was a large crack in her thigh. Her hair was thoroughly messed up and while she was awake, focused and glaring at Kirill, I could tell that she was in pain. Vile thoughts filled my mind as I looked to Kirill. Never have I wanted to kill someone, until now. And judging by the growls that filled the room, I wasn't alone. Kirill snapped his fingers and one of the guards placed his hands on Rosalie's face, threatening to rip her head off, and the room was silenced instantly.

"You will remember your manners," Kirill ordered and Taras smiled behind him. Kirill crossed the room and walked up to Rosalie. He cupped her cheek in his hand and attempted to fix her hair. She stood tall, like she always did, and her eyes stared straight ahead. Kirill's hand then fell to the crack that was slowly healing in her thigh and he stuck a finger in the crack, pulling it just a bit more. Rosalie's leg gave and she gave a scream of pain that brought tears to my eyes. Kirill smiled and removed his hand, kissing Rosalie on the cheek before stepping away.

"You are not so tough," he said smugly. "But, you are guilty. Are you ready for your punishment?" Rosalie didn't answer and Kirill chuckled to himself before he gave a snap of his fingers.


	32. Chapter 32

Dickens

At the sound of Kirill's snapping fingers, the two guards holding Rosalie stepped away and retreated to their posts. Rosalie appeared to stumble a bit without their support but eventually found her footing and stood tall, putting her weight on her good leg. Kirill smiled proudly at her and relaxed back into his chair. He asked Rosalie if she preferred English or Russian and Rosalie answered English.

"What is your name, beautiful one?"

"Rosalie Lillian Hale," she answered, her voice surprisingly calm and just as intimidating.

"Rosalie…very fitting," Kirill said wistfully, his eyes roaming over Rosalie's naked body. "I understand, Rosalie, that you were not very forthcoming with our questions. Therefore you have no one to blame but yourself for those injuries you shall now bear."

"I'm aware of that."

"Why didn't you answer our questions?"

"Because you didn't need to know the answers," Rosalie's eyebrow rose at Kirill and he growled, gripping the side of his chair. Using his vampire speed, he raced down the stairs and slapped Rosalie bitterly across the face. Emmett started to fight against the guards again and Kirill grabbed Rosalie's face.

"Yes, keep fighting them," he urged to Emmett, who had stopped dead in his tracks. "Keep fighting them and she'll be dead and burned before you can even make your way over here." Emmett's muscles flexed angrily and his nostrils flared as he considered the options.

"Emmett," Rosalie's voice travelled over the anger. "Emmett, stop it, please." Emmett's face softened instantly at the sound of Rosalie's voice and he obediently stopped fighting, almost as if someone had shut off a switch in his mind. Kirill nodded slowly at Emmett before turning his expression back to Rosalie.

"As for you, beautiful one, you will learn to hold your tongue from insults. You are lucky that you are still alive. Do not ruin this for yourself with your arrogance. Your pride means nothing to us here." He snarled down at Rosalie and she managed to nod before he let her go. Kirill then travelled slowly back up the steps and sat back down in his chair. He made eyes with me and snapped his fingers. The guard that was holding me suddenly put his arm around my neck and held it there tightly. I could still breathe, but it was enough to make me panic. Alice screamed and tried to help, but she was outmatched against her guard. Rosalie looked over at me and then turned to Kirill, snarling.

"To ensure that you will cooperate this time, any unpleasing answer will result in her death. Do you understand me?" Rosalie nodded quickly and it seemed to surprise Kirill that she gave in so quickly. However he quickly regained his composure and stroked his chin for a moment.

"Tell me, Rosalie, what of the red haired vampire? Did you kill her?"

"Yes,"

"Why?"

"She was threatening myself and my family."

"Why was she threatening them."

"In America, her coven challenged ours. It was met with the death of her mate. She sought out revenge on us."

"So, you have killed more than one vampire?"

"I have killed three to this day. I killed the red head, her mate and their companion."

"All by yourself?"

"Yes, my family knew better and therefore did not lay a hand on them. I killed them all." Alice gasped next to me and opened her mouth but Rosalie turned her around and shot her a look that silenced her instantly. I began to quake with nerves and looked over at Edward. He appeared to be reading Rosalie's mind and I would have given anything to know what her motives were.

Kirill glared down at her and opened his mouth to speak but Taras, speaking for the first time, beat him to it. "Just who do you think you are?" he asked cruelly, standing up. "These are you brethren and yet you slaughter them like cattle!" he was shouting now and his voice was pure but fierce as it rang over my head.

"Better their lives than mine," Rosalie answered simply.

"I think not!" Taras answered. "You are nothing but filth and I am saddened that I cannot kill you for each time you killed one of your own." He rose from his chair and sauntered down the steps until he was face to face with Rosalie's. Once there, he opened his mouth, and spit on her. It landed on her cheek and was quick to wipe it away but did nothing to retaliate. I could feel Emmett fuming and Esme seemed to have become void in her guard's arms.

"Now, now, Taras," Kirill chided, laughing a bit at his brother's actions, "calm yourself. You're no better than her with that temper of yours." Taras headed back to his chair and Kirill smiled at himself, shaking his head before he focused on Rosalie again. "So, Rosalie, you have killed three vampires. Are you also responsible for bringing this human into Sangvine?" Rosalie looked over at me and I felt the guard's grip tighten on my neck just a bit. Despite his grip I managed to nod to her. I didn't want her to die, especially not if it was protecting me. Rosalie sighed and returned my nod before turning back to Kirill.

"Yes, I did."

"Why?"

Rosalie lowered her head for a moment and Kirill raised his hand to snap his fingers and presumably my neck. "No, wait, please!" Rosalie shouted, stopping Kirill in his tracks. "Please, sir, understand that it is not my place to answer that question."

"And whose place is it?"

Rosalie licked her lips and while it was only for a second, Kirill lost his patience. He looked to me and I thought for sure I was going to die, but his eyes over looked mine and darted to a far corner of the room where another vampire was standing. He was not wearing a cloak but a black suit and he stood with his hands behind his back. I wondered if this was Yuri but figured I would get my answer sooner or later. "It seems…that this human's life is not enough to make you answer the questions. But you did mention just how important yours was," he said to Rosalie as he kept his eyes on Yuri. "Perhaps she will change your mind."

Kirill smiled then and threw his arm out to Yuri. "Yuri, please call on Vera."

I and a few others gasped and Rosalie's head shot up and she looked to Kirill before turning her head towards Yuri. Yuri nodded and disappeared behind a door and Rosalie took a few steps that way, her eyes focused the door. I looked to the Cullens and noted the confusion on their face. Vera must have been a new and unknown addition to the Regentoi The silence was agonizing as we waited for Vera. I held my breath, praying that it was just a coincidence, that this was not the Vera that Rosalie knew. Vera was a common Russian name. It couldn't be, it simply couldn't be. One look to the rest of the Cullens told me that they were thinking the same thing and I held my breath again as I heard footsteps coming down the hall.

Kirill smiled as Yuri reappeared from behind the door. Rosalie made a sort of whimper as she waited to see who was following him. The footsteps were light and we all watched as the door was pushed open. I took one look at her and exhaled.

It was not Rosalie's Vera.

The rest of the family seemed to be relieved too and yet Rosalie's expression still hadn't changed. The girl known as Vera was a little girl. In fact, she couldn't have been older than five, though it was unclear as to what her maturity was. She had beautiful bronze hair that was curled into tight ringlets and her dress looked to be too nice for a place like this. She toddled in and flashed a smile to Kirill who returned it and I could tell immediately that she was his favorite. She made her way over to Rosalie and looked up at her, giggling almost innocently.

And Rosalie…Rosalie smiled. She smiled down at this girl and her eyes filled with kindness. I gasped and tried to fight against the guard, but it only worked to my disadvantage. This wasn't right. This wasn't right at all. Rosalie didn't deserve this. I knew it was a trick, whatever it was. And the Regentoi may not have known of Rosalie's past but this child should not be here. Rosalie didn't deserve this. I started screaming. I screamed loudly and no one seemed to pay me any mind, especially Rosalie.

Vera smiled at Rosalie again and motioned for Rosalie come closer. The blonde complied instantly and crouched to her knees, her eyes so tender and motherly as they gazed upon this demon. My screaming must have started annoying my guard for his grip on my neck tightened and though I hated it, I could no longer scream. But I continued to fight against him despite the futility of it. The rest of the Cullens looked like they were in shock, hanging in suspense at what was about to happen.

Vera giggled again, her rosy cheeks almost matching the color of her eyes and I watched as Rosalie returned the smile, sighing with her eyes glazed over as if she was in her own fantasy with this little girl, everything surrounding her gone. Vera reached her tiny hand out and held it in mid air for a moment. Then she smiled to herself, and placed her hand against Rosalie's cheek.

What resulted next literally broke my heart. The instant Vera touched Rosalie, Rosalie cried out in pain and fell to the floor, writhing in agony. Vera followed Rosalie as she fell, making sure to keep contact with her. My blonde protector was making sounds that I never wanted to hear and I started to sob as I fought against my guard. The Cullens had started fighting against theirs as well and Kirill watched us amusedly. Taras was more focused on Rosalie, a perverse grin falling on his face as he watched her suffering.

All of us were shouting as loudly as we could, pleading with them to make her stop but they seemed to be paying no real mind to us. Rosalie was still wailing, her eyes clenched tightly shut as she clawed at the floor, immobile beyond raking her fingers on the stone. I couldn't watch it anymore and I looked away, my eyes meeting Edward's. He was standing tall and watching emotionlessly, but her faced me and I could feel the cold wind against my tears. Edward closed his eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, and then nodded to me. Alice stopped fighting and gasped, looking to Edward.

"I did it!" he shouted over everyone. His voice carried over our shouting and Rosalie's ears and reached Kirill instantly, who held up a hand. Vera's eyes latched onto Kirill's raised hand and she pulled her hand away from Rosalie instantly, who seemed to relax, trying to contain her whimpers as she fought to compose herself. She looked to Kirill for his next command and he waved her away. She looked slightly saddened by this but did as she was told, exiting the room.

"What was that?" Kirill asked, standing. The guard let Edward go and he walked over Rosalie and stood in front of the leader.

"I said that I did it. I did it all. I wanted Rosalie to take the blame for me, but I just can't do it anymore." Esme gasped as Carlisle's brow furrowed. I found that I couldn't reign in my thoughts. I didn't know what Edward was planning or what was going on.

"Explain yourself," Kirill said, clearly losing his patience.

"Those three vampires Rosalie mentioned? I killed them. I was the one that lost my temper with the coven and I was the one that killed the red head here. But I fled the scene and it forced Rosalie to take the blame. I was the one that told Rosalie to bring the human here."

"Why?"

"Because, I love her," Edward said slowly. "I love her and I wanted to be with her."

"So why didn't you change her?"

"I…I couldn't. I couldn't risk losing her in the process. But I couldn't let her alone. I am damned, and prepared to take my punishment."

Kirill seemed to ponder this for a moment but then nodded. "Very well. You are sentenced to death for the murder of three vampires and bringing a human into Sangvine." Edward nodded and Kirill placed his hands on his head.

"Edward!" Esme shouted, fighting against the guards.

"What are you doing, son?" Carlisle shouted. Edward turned around to his father and smiled, his eyes darting over each and every one of us.

"It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done," he quoted, his eyes shining as Alice managed to laugh. We all knew the quote and while I was still tormented, I managed to smile. It was such an Edward thing to do and Esme and Carlisle told him they loved him before Edward turned around. Esme lowered her head and I chose to stare at Alice, who must have had the same thought with me for we both looked at each other as Kirill placed his hands on Edward's face, and ripped his head off.

Esme started sobbing and Kirill summoned his guards who picked up Edward and took him away. I went limp in the guards arms and he didn't seem to noticed. Rosalie was still on the ground, her eyes closed and occasionally she would twitch with ache. But she was alive. She was alive.

Kirill wiped his hands on a guard's cloak and then turned to me. "One crime has been paid for. Now for the other." He proceeded towards me and I panicked as Alice poke up.

"Why? Edward brought her here! He was punished!" She was fighting in the guard's grasp and Kirill laughed as he turned to her.

"The human has a mind, yes? She can make decisions for herself, yes? But she chose to come to Sangvine. Therefore, she will be punished for her insolence."

"No! No please, take me instead!" Alice shouted. I looked at over at her and saw that she was completely serious. I opened my mouth to challenge her but Kirill stopped me.

"What is it with this human? Do you all of live human?" he asked angrily. Alice nodded and I looked over to see the rest of the Cullens nodding as well. Even Esme and Carlisle, who I thought would be inconsolable, were looking Kirill right in the eyes. There was movement behind Kirill and I watched as Rosalie struggled to her feet. The crack in her thigh was healing but she still kept her weight on her good leg. She looked as if she was about to die, but she managed to nod. Kirill looked around the room, seemingly impressed and then turned back to me.

"You are much loved," he whispered, reaching out to touch my hair. "It is a pity that you must die in front of them." Alice started fighting against the guards as did the rest of the Cullens. Kirill came over to me and I felt his hands on my head. I tried to turn to Alice, to tell her that I loved her, but I couldn't. I couldn't believe this was actually happening. That I would be leaving Alice, Rosalie…my family. Tears ran down my cheeks as I shut my eyes, preparing for the pain and hoping it would be quick.

A howl echoed throughout the room and Kirill's hands were gone. I opened my eyes and looked up, watching as Kirill's head lifted slowly upward and above his head. Taras was also looking, as well as the Cullens. The howl had been like nothing I had ever heard before. It sounded vaguely like a vampire but also different, more tormented somehow. Kirill turned to Yuri and mumbled to him in Russian. He nodded and raced out of the room. All was silent as everyone kept their eyes on the ceiling. Even the guards had lifted their eyes and I felt my heartbeat racing.

Yuri returned a few minutes later and the stillness in the room was evident as he crossed the room to Kirill. The leader leaned in as Yuri placed his lips to his ear and mumbled something. Kirill nodded slowly, his face contorting as Yuri continued to tell him what was apparently a very long story. When he finished he pulled away slowly and bowed his head. Kirill took a deep breath and then looked at me. He glared and leaned over, sniffing my hair. Then he breathed in deeply and I closed my eyes. When he pulled away he gave a strange sort of growl and stepped back. He then bent over and held his head in his hands for a moment. When he finally lifted his head he headed over to the guards and motioned to them. Simultaneously they let us go. Alice was by my side in an instant, embracing me tightly.

"Leonid has seen something fascinating. You are all free to go," he said simply, with a wave of his hand. Then he headed over to a guard and ripped the cloak off of him, handing it to Rosalie, who was wrapped tightly in Emmett's arm. She looked like she was about to challenge him, but then thought better of it and took the cloak. Emmett took the cloak from her and wrapped it around her before picking her up in his arms.

"What do you mean we're free to go? What did Leonid say?" Carlisle asked.

Kirill shook his head and there was something about the way he was acting that told even me not to question him. "You do not need to know, for it will not change the outcome. My guards will escort you to the city limits. We found your car. Go to it and leave Sangvine. I trust that we will not again meet here." Kirill smiled then and I wondered why he put such a strange emphasis on the word 'here.'

Carlisle opened his mouth to retaliate but merely shrugged and mumbled an "Okay," his voice almost lifeless as Esme clutched at his side. I looked down at the floor then, remembering Edward and the one good thing I'd ever known him to do. I remembered Rosalie's story of how he was the perfect son and tears came to my eyes. Not for Edward necessarily, but…for the heartache it had all caused. I wondered for a moment if this family would ever heal, if I would ever heal and truly be accepted by them. Alice sighed into my ear and pulled back to kiss me. I kissed her back and though we were just starting anew, I knew that things would be okay. After all, all we had was forever.


	33. Chapter 33

Waiting

As Kirill had said, we were escorted in the cold all the way to the car Rosalie had left. The mood was somber but also paranoid. I kept looking over my shoulder at the guards and everyone seemed to be on edge. I didn't like it, and when we finally made it to the car, I wasn't as excited or relieved as I had hoped to be. The guards spoke in Russian to Carlisle and he gave a simple nod, gesturing for us to get into the car. We did as we were told, Emmett climbing in first as he was still cradling Rosalie in his arms. I could tell that she was feeling better as far as it went and her facial expression hinted to me that she would have preferred walking but the smile on her face was just for Emmett and it was sweet to see.

He talked to her in a hushed voice on the right side of the car as Alice took the middle seat leaving me to the left behind Carlisle, who was driving with Esme in the front passenger. The moment between Rosalie and Emmett was extremely personal and I didn't want to look for too long. But I did stare for a few more moments just to see the look in their eyes as they spoke to one another. I think I realized then for the first time just how much they loved each other. I couldn't tell just how romantic it was, but it didn't matter. Love was love and I was bearing witness to one of the purest forms I'd ever seen.

Alice placed her hand on top of mine and I looked over at her. She looked exhausted but happy. I wished I could join in her happiness but I couldn't. It was too good to believe, no matter how much I wanted to. Carlisle mumbled something to all of us and in a moment all of the windows were being rolled down. I could only assume it had to do with my scent. Alice reached over me and rolled my window down before she zipped up my jacket and sat on my lap. She leaned against the side of the door and with her there she obstructed the cold wind that was flying through the window. I smiled at her and she returned it, leaning over to hug me. I hugged her back and when I pulled away I opened my mouth to ask Alice what was going to happen .But she shook her head, silencing me, and leaned in to kiss me once more.

"Just enjoy it right now. We'll talk later."

"Alice…I miss my dad," I said softly, trying to keep the waiver out of my voice. However, Alice must have heard it for she reached out and wrapped her arms around me, holding me tightly.

"We'll be in cell range soon, Bella. I'm sure one of us has an international phone on them and you can call him. Just a few more hours."

I nodded at her and she rested her head on my shoulder. It was comforting and I loved feeling her against me once again but I couldn't imagine how terrible my father was feeling. I looked down, sighing, and felt something brush against my thigh. Looking up, I noticed Rosalie was staring at me. She'd kicked me with her bare foot and now I was looking into those eyes that seemed to have regained some of their life

"Your dad will understand, Bella," Rosalie said slowly, as if speaking was still hard for her. "He's been fairly decent to you through all of this. And you're a good daughter. Everything will work itself out, won't it, Alice?"

Rosalie looked to the pixie on my lap and kicked her softly. Alice smiled and grabbed Rosalie's foot, rubbing it softly and Emmett nuzzled into Rosalie's neck as she ran her fingers through his hair. I smiled at all of them, knowing that they were right. Besides, there was nothing that could be done about it now. Taking a deep and relieving breath, I pulled Alice closer to me and held her until we reached Norilsk.

0-0-0-0-0

I waited until we were in the United States to call Charlie. I didn't want my mother to get my phone bill and see extra costs listed for Russia. In Norilsk there was a quick stop to grab clothes for Rosalie and from there we had no problems getting on a plane out of there. When we arrived in Moscow we had a massive layover. Thankfully the heat was much more tolerable and the Cullens took that opportunity to leave the airport and find something to satiate themselves. Rosalie was still fairly full so she stayed with me and pretended to sleep on my lap, lying across three seats. I absently watched the people as they passed, stroking Rosalie's hair, which she didn't seem to protest to.

When the Cullens finally returned Rosalie opened her eyes and greeted them civilly, looking much better. Alice's eyes were shining bright when she saw me again and she hugged my tightly, sniffing my neck for reassurance. I kissed her in front of everyone to tell her that I was never worried. Carlisle and Esme both smiled at me but I could see in their eyes that their hearts weren't in it. It was understandable and I smiled back without any hard feelings.

I slept on the flight overseas and even though I slept well, I somehow knew that Alice's arms were always around me, holding me tightly. I turned my phone on the minute that it was allowed and after letting it fire up, I saw that I had double digit missed calls and voicemails. Almost all of them were from Charlie or Renee and even a few were from Angela or Mike. Jacob hadn't called and I had to admit that surprised me a little. I called Charlie first and only managed to smile when Alice grasped my hand and gave it a squeeze. It rang once before Charlie answered, his breathing erratic and hopeful.

"Bella, Bella, is that you?"

"It's me, dad, I'm fine," I said quickly, feeling my heart racing right along with him.

There were a few sputters on the other end of the line. Charlie then asked for me to hang on for a minute and I nodded, hearing the palm of his hand cover the phone. Alice whispered to me that he was crying and then promptly wiped the tear that was running down my cheek. I sniffed once and she gave me a reassuring smile before my father got back on the phone.

"Bells," he said, his voice cracking. He sniffed and I could almost picture him wiping his nose, sitting down flabbergasted at the tiny table in the kitchen. "Bells, where are you? Are you safe? I…I don't…"

"Dad, daddy, I'm fine," I said quickly. "I'll be home real soon. Did you get my note?"

"Well, yeah I got your note but you didn't say hardly anything. I mean, I went and compared your handwriting because it seemed like the vague note a kidnapper would write. Your mom and I have been worried sick."

"I know. I'm sorry, dad. There was just something that I had to do."

"And you couldn't have spared a phone call?"

"…I could have. I'm sorry, dad. Something happened and I just thought that I had to move as fast as I could and—

"What happened? Are you okay? Did…I don't know. I don't know what to think that could have happened that would cause you to do this, Bella. I mean I'm happier than hell to hear from you but just…just so disappointed that you didn't think you could trust your old man."

I sniffed and Alice caught my tears again. From across the terminal I could see the rest of the Cullens sitting and pretending not to be interested in what I was saying. And possibly the only two people whose apathy I could believe were Carlisle's and Esme's. They looked so lifeless sitting there. And they had hardly spoken a word since we left Sangvine. Alice's eyes followed my glance and she sighed as she watched her parents. Giving me one last hopeful look, Alice left me to finish my conversation with my father and went over to Esme, sitting down and taking her mother's hand in her own. I looked away, unable to witness the sadness in Esme's eyes, and replied to my father.

"I do trust you, dad, really. I just…I didn't know how you would take it. And I was scared. I'm sorry, dad."

There was a silence on the phone and then I heard my father sigh. "I can't do this over the phone, Bella. There's too much to say and I've never liked not seeing someone's face when I'm talking to them. When are you and when are you coming home?"

"I'm in Seattle. I'm taking a plane to Port Angeles and it's supposed to arrive at around six."

"I'll be there to pick you up."

"Okay, thanks, dad."

"You're welcome. And Bells?"

"Yeah?"

"Please be there."

I pursed my lips together and nodded. My father must have known that for he then told me that he loved me and I heard the click of the receiver. I closed the phone and sighed. Charlie didn't really deserve all that I done to him. But it was too late for that now. A slender arm wrapped itself around my shoulders and I smiled as I leaned into Alice. She stroked my cheek softly and then kissed it.

"It went well, Bella. Just as Rosalie said: he will understand."

"Have you seen it?"

"I have."

"Thank you," I said softly. My hand reached out and found hers and she laced our fingers together as I shot a glance towards Carlisle and Esme. "How are they doing?"

Alice licked her lips and shrugged, eyeing Rosalie for a moment or two as if they'd both shared the same thought. "They're terribly heartbroken, Bella. I mean, it's understandable, but we're unsure of how all of this is going to turn out."

"What do you mean?"

"They, Carlisle and Esme, might leave us for a bit. They might go off on their own to cope. And it will be…new, to say the least, for me. Rosalie and Emmett often come and go as they like for a few decades but I…I've always been with them." She paused pensively and then turned to smile at me. "But as I said, I will never leave you. Something tells me that despite the sadness that lingers now, this all might turn out for the better some day."

"Well, it can only get better from here. As Edward said, 'It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done.'"

Alice nodded, heaving an almost mischievous sigh. "Yes, he did say that. Though, I see his Dickens and raise him Bard. 'Nothing in his life

Became him like the leaving of it.'"

Alice smiled at me and I was able to return it effortlessly just as we were called to board.

0-0-0-0-0

Alice and I had discussed on the plane that I would go on ahead without them to spare the Cullens any scrutiny. They were willing to take full responsibility for my leaving, but it wasn't the truth. In the end I somehow managed to convince them of that and the rest of the flight carried on in silence. When we landed I was more nervous than ever, but also more determined to set things right with my father. I wanted to set things right with my mother too, but she surprisingly didn't answer my calls. That saddened me a bit, but I decided not to dwell on it for too long. I knew she loved me and was worried.

The Cullens stood by and out of the way as we headed out of the terminal while Alice took a few more steps ahead with me. Just around the corner was the arrivals gate and I knew that Charlie would standing at the very front of the line. Alice smiled and me and gave me a hug, pulling away to kiss me slowly. I blushed because of all the people around but you couldn't have pulled me away with a crane. When Alice pulled away she smiled somberly and gestured to her family.

"We have a lot to talk about tonight. If there's time afterward, I'd like to come and visit you."

"I want you to visit. Come even when I'm sleeping. It hasn't stopped you before."

"No, no it hasn't. Good luck, Bella," Alice answered, kissing me once more before waving me on to through the gate. I nodded and waved to the rest of the Cullens before I turned and rounded that corner.

Just as expected, Charlie was standing at the front of the crowd, clutching his leather jacket tightly. What was unexpected was that my mother and Phil were standing next to him. I stopped in my tracks for a moment and they all seemed to stop breathing as we first laid eyes on each other. Then my heart raced and suddenly I was propelled forward. My family. My family was waiting for me. They seemed to wake up like I did and in an instant I was surrounded by their loving arms. My mother was weeping and someone, either Charlie or Phil, seemed to be crying as well. But I was too, so it really didn't matter in the long run.

When I was finally let go my mother's face appeared before me. She grabbed both of my cheeks in her hands and shook my head gently, tears running down her own cheeks. "Bella, Bella, what happened? Where'd you go? Did something happen? Charlie called us and we had just been so worried. And Phil left the game but, honey, we're so glad you're safe!" She embraced me again and I hugged her back tightly, remembering that strange, alcohol free perfume that she wore. Phil nodded in agreement and Renee's words and gave me nod and it told me that he didn't mind leaving the game one bit.

Charlie stepped forward then, still fumbling with his jacket, his eyes cast downward. His nose had turned a violent red color and his eyes seemed to match. I gave my mother one final squeeze and then tore myself from her grasp, running over to my father and embracing him. My arms just barely reached around his back and I could smell the leather from his jacket and the strange musk of the constant forest rain on him. He stumbled for a moment but then I felt his arms around me and I felt safe. We held onto each for a moment and when he pulled away he coughed almost angrily, eyeing Phil and nodding his head.

"Well, let's, uh, let's get you home, Bells," he said, giving me a short smile.

The rest of us smiled back and we headed over to baggage claim. Everything sort of fell into a strange sense of complacency after that. My luggage was claimed without any trouble and we all walked pleasantly to the car. The drive was also pleasant and mom and I talked about her travels and Phil's games. As it turned out he was doing fairly well. Charlie was still hanging out with Billy Black and while he had mentioned Jacob asking for me, I couldn't say that I believed him. In fact, he talked very strangely about Jacob. It was almost as if he was referencing him just to satisfy me or himself. I didn't like it, but I didn't want to ask questions either.

It wasn't until we pulled up into the driveway that the mood changed. Everyone climbed out rather quickly and scuttled into the house, pushing me along with them. Before I could really understand what was happening, I was sitting on the couch with my family surrounding me. Charlie had taken the chair and mom was sitting next to me while Phil stood behind me, gripping the couch. I licked my lips, feeling the burn and just how dry they were. My mom reached out for me then, grabbing my hand.

"Honey, you know we're here for you, don't you. Anything that's going on with you, we'll all deal with it together, as a family. So, Bella, tell us what happened." My mother squeezed my hand tightly and I could see Phil nodding in my peripheral.

I took a deep breath, feeling my cheeks flush. I wasn't a century old vampire. I didn't know how to lie. Maybe I shouldn't lie. As far as I knew, my mother still didn't even know about Alice. Well, the truth hadn't failed me so far. Of course, I'd still have to edit it a bit. Something told me that right now they wouldn't believe the whole 'vampire' bit, no matter how true it was.

"Well…I, mom, I have a girlfriend. Her name is Alice Cullen." For a moment I paused, waiting for my mother's reaction. Then I reconsidered it and before she could have the chance to answer I started speaking again.

"And, well, she had to…move. She and her family moved and I really think that I love her, mom. So I took her leaving really hard. And because of that I started hanging out with Jacob. Well, Jacob wanted more than friendship. And he didn't take my platonic approach very well. I didn't either and I got even more bothered by it all. And I couldn't take it anymore. I had to go see her. So I did. And that's where I've been, with Alice…my girlfriend…whom I love."

I took a deep breath and squeezed my mother's hand. Her expression hadn't changed since I started the story and that worried me a little. Charlie looked a little skeptical but was definitely handling it better than Phil, who looked to have paled. It was understandable as I'd already, poorly, told Charlie about Alice. But I didn't like the skepticism I saw in his eyes. He was a police officer. He was good at reading people. I could only hope that he would let this one go.

"So, you're gay, honey?" my mom asked, speaking for the first time.

I looked over at her and shrugged, my cheeks blushing. I'd only ever felt like this for Alice, who happened to be a woman. I told my mom this and she nodded in a very motherly way. It was motherly in that I didn't understand what was behind it.

"Well, it looks as if you've just got a bit too much of a romantic in you. Gallivanting off to see your love—significant other." She sighed wistfully and I gave a sigh of relief at her cavalier response. Phil looked to be okay with it as well, as far as it went. Though, truth be told, while he was nice I didn't really care what he thought. Charlie then harrumphed and stood up from his chair, looking down at me in a rather fatherly manner.

"Well, Bella, I'm still disappointed in you. I mean, you kids have computers. You can email, webcam. You sure as hell don't have to go running off to east God knows where just to see her. How did Alice handle all of this?"

"She, um, didn't like me leaving you like I did either. But she's moving back, so there will be no more worries in that department." I gave a hopeful smile but if faded when it wasn't returned. Charlie adjusted his gun belt a bit before finally taking it off and throwing it in the chair.

"You're grounded, Bells. You're grounded from a lot of things for a long time."

"Is Alice one of those things?" I asked, scooting to the edge of my seat. Charlie opened his mouth and my mom made a sound. It drew his attention and from where I was I could see her mouthing something to him but I couldn't tell what it was. Charlie looked at her slowly and appeared to be processing her words. Then he sighed, his broad shoulders falling, and shrugged.

"Hell, you travelled across the country to see her. I suppose a grounding from her isn't gonna do nothing at all. But, I do want to have a talk with her. If you'll let her know." He eyed me and I nodded obediently.

"Yes, sir,"

Charlie smiled a bit at that and I returned it, leaning into my mother for another hug and simultaneously yawning. My mother pulled away from her hug and then smiled down at me. "Why don't you go up and nap for a bit, sweetie? I'll cook dinner for all of us and we can finish talking about this when you've gotten some rest."

I told her that would be a good idea and after a few more minutes of speaking I was finally able to head up the stairs to where my vampire was waiting.


	34. Chapter 34

All We Have

A few days had passed since my return. Mom and Charlie thought it would be best if I waited until Monday to head back to school so I could back in the groove easily. I had only missed a few days but it felt like I would have to repeat the grade or something by the way they spoke. Jacob still had not come by nor had he returned my calls. I wondered if he was dead but Alice had assured me that he wasn't. Yet when I pried for more information, she clammed up, insisting that it wasn't her business. So I had no Jacob again. Though sometimes, at night, I could have sworn that I heard a wolf howling not so far in the distance.

But I didn't mind. Because not heading back to school until Monday meant that I had four days to spend with Alice. However, today was now Sunday and even though Alice would be returning to school with me I still felt weird about the whole thing. Alice was helping with my nerves to the best of her abilities…which were very good to begin with.

We were lying on my bed together. Alice had wrapped one leg over mine and used it to keep us as close as possible. I could hardly mind. I thought I would be used to it, her, by now but it just wasn't the case. I was still surprised to see her every morning, see her beautiful face and try to understand why they lit up so much as she gazed at me. But I wasn't complaining. Alice was back. And she was back with me. My aforementioned pixie then licked her lips and raised her eyebrows.

I knew what that meant. I knew what that meant and I didn't like it. I shook my head and kissed her slowly, hoping she would somehow forget what she had just suggested. Alice wove her fingers through my hair and allowed the kiss for a few more seconds before pulling away. I tried to follow her lips but the hand on my head remained firm and I pulled my own hair when I struggled. The result of this was me groaning in annoyance and Alice laughed as she untangled her hand from my hair.

"I'm going to have to talk to him sooner or later," Alice said to me, her eyebrows working to form an intimidating look. It worked…kind of… but not really.

"Yeah but what if he says something mean. What if he threatens you or something?"

"He's not going to do any of those things. He just wants to talk. I know these things." Alice pointed to her head and I rolled my eyes.

"That doesn't make me feel any better."

"Well it should."

"Well it doesn't."

"Well then,"

"Well then indeed."

Alice laughed again and I found that I couldn't keep the glare on my face. She leaned forward and kissed me again. It was just long enough for me to fall for it and by the time I realized her lips were gone, she was too. I groaned, cursing her in my mind and sitting up. Not three seconds later the doorbell rang and I had to grip onto my bed to keep from racing downstairs to beat my father to the door. Alice was right in that she needed to talk to him. And waiting too long might result in Charlie not responding so well to her. I scoffed at that notion. Yeah…like anyone couldn't respond well to Alice. You'd have to be in a coma…or Russian.

The front door opened and I made my way to my own door, pulling it open as gently as I could. They were talking softly and I could only make out a few words. Taking extra care, I stepped out into the hallway. It creaked a bit, but not loudly enough that Charlie would have heard. I licked my lips and got down on my knees, using my jeans to slide over to the top of the stairs. It seemed soundless to me, though I was sure Alice was smirking to herself downstairs. However, though I wasn't completely discrete, I could definitely hear more clearly.

"You're looking well, Alice. How are your…"

"They're just fine, sir. I made a full recovery. Though, I'm supposed to stay from in between vehicles for future reference."

"Yeah, yeah that'd be a good idea. And first off…I'm very sorry about Edward. He was a good kid, you know?"

There was a silence then and I bit my bottom lip, choosing to play with my nails as I tried to imagine just what Alice was doing. After a few minutes I could hear her heave a great sigh. "Thank you. It's…it's been hard. But we're working through it. Your sympathy is very much appreciated."

"No problem. So, uh, I don't want you to feel like you're in an interrogation or anything, but I'd like to ask you some questions."

"I'll answer to the best of my abilities, Chief Swan."

"Charlie, please. I understand that you guys went up north for awhile?"

"Yes, Carlisle got word of a great therapy center specializing in hip therapy. None of us really had a say in the matter. It was sort of sweet, albeit our quick departure."

"I'd say it was fairly quick. You sure left Bella in one hell of a mess."

"I know and I can't…I really can't stress just how much it still hurts to know what I did. To see it in Bella's eyes and yours and in the mirror every morning. I'm not trying to wax angst, Charlie, but it really wasn't my intention. I would never intentionally hurt Bella."

"I know that, kid. No one would intentionally hurt Bella. And if they did, they'd have me to deal with."

"Is that a threat, sir?"

"You just said you didn't intentionally hurt her."

"So I'm safe from the wrath of Chief Swan?"

"For now," Charlie chuckled and I could hear Alice's tiny giggle as well. "Now, I don't mean to pry here, Alice, but you do only want what's best for Bella, don't you? This isn't some teenage phase you're going through? Because Bella is too damn fond of you for you to—

"I love her, Charlie. And not this teenage faux love, this is real."

"Well…that's…that's good to hear. You be sweet to her."

"With all due respect, when am I not sweet?"

"That's a damn good point, Alice."

There was more laughter and I heard Charlie excuse Alice. Not a moment later she appeared at the base of the stairs, pointing a finger at me. I stayed exactly where I was until she reached me. It was then that I had intended to get up but it appeared that Alice had other plans as she scooped me up in her arms and carried me back into my room.

"You naughty little eavesdropper, you," Alice hummed to me as she closed my door with her foot and proceeded to take me over to the bed. She laid me down and then rested herself on top of me, brushing my hair back. I shrugged as innocently as I could and wrapped my arms around her.

"Can you blame me? Never know when I might have to protect you from my father."

Alice sighed whimsically and shook her head. "He is just the sweetest man."

"I'm sure he thinks the same about you."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Alice kissed me then, slowly and sweetly with her cold hand placed upon my cheek. I felt like crying for some reason but managed not to. She pulled away after a few minutes and I took my bottom lip in my teeth. She laughed at that and brushed my lip with her thumb, pulling it from my teeth. "That's why you're lips get so chapped, you know."

"Right…it's not from constant kissing or anything."

"Of course not. But seriously though, please be careful. I don't want you to accidentally draw blood."

"I am careful," I said earnestly. Alice nodded and I took a deep breath. The look in her eyes told me that she knew what was coming and yet she allowed me to say it anyway. "I don't…want my blood to be a problem anymore."

Alice closed her eyes and shook her head sadly. "It's not your fault, Bella, it's mine. And I'm getting so much better. It's almost easy now."

"But it's still a hindrance. I don't like that you have to be so gentle with me."

"You like it rough?"

"Don't change the subject. This is serious," I said slowly. Alice nodded again and her shoulders fell a bit.

"I know what you want, Bella. But I don't want you to want it because of me. Because it's your life. And the word 'life' has so much meaning now."

"I do want it because of you. I want it because of us, Rosalie, Esme, your entire family. It would solve so many problems. My blood, how gentle you have to be. The Regentoi might even leave us alone."

"I actually think The Regentoi want you changed. I feel that somewhere inside, though I can't see it. I can't yet see what Leonid has." Alice looked sadly at me and I took her hand, rubbing it gently.

"What do you see in our future?"

"It's not what Leonid sees. I know that."

"I don't care about what Leonid sees."

"You should, Bella. You really should."

"What do you see in our future?"

Alice swallowed and then cast me a short grin. She entwined her fingers with mine and played with them a bit. "I see us…happy. I see you changed and we're all happy."

I smiled and kissed her chastely. "That sounds like a good plan."

"But it's not the plan, Bella. Some unknown factor will present itself to become what Leonid has seen."

"So?"

"Do you really not care about your life? Before or after changing is it that meager to you? Because I know that if you died I would really have a problem continuing on." Alice frowned at me and then looked away, though I could feel her hand gently squeezing mine for reassurance. I squeezed it back as hard as I could and nestled closer to her.

"I don't think I'm going to die. No one said anything about me dying. I just…I just want to be with you for as long as I possibly can. And that can be forever if I'm changed. Unless…unless you don't want that." I hadn't really thought about what Alice thought. It had really only been my selfish desires up until now and while I had originally thought that Alice would be all for this…maybe she had other plans. As if she'd heard me, Alice lifted my head to look me in the eyes. Her eyes were golden brown and shining bright as she creased her brow, daring me to look away from just how serious she was.

"I want nothing more than to be with you forever. I just…it might not be forever, you know? The Regentoi might—

"You know, maybe we should not look that much into the future," I said quickly, interrupting her. "If I could have just one minute where you could kiss or touch me with as much strength as you'd like then it would be worth it."

Alice laughed softly and put her hand on my cheek. "You're entirely too selfless…and just a bit strange."

"Strange is good, isn't it?"

"Of course it is. Bella, may I explain something to you?"

Alice looked nervous and that in turn made me nervous but I managed to nod. "Changing into one of us is not pleasant. It's absolutely the worst pain you can imagine. No, you can't even imagine it. You're on fire for days, Bella, sometimes weeks. The body needs to die and be regenerated and that takes time. And you will wake up with fire again. It hurts so badly, Bella. It's like inhaling smoke constantly but ten times worse. You'll want to attack anything and everything that has blood in it and the restraint from that is brutal. It is possible, of course, but not without some practice. None of this will be easy. Are you really sure that you want this?"

I nodded and Alice managed to laugh. "That didn't faze you at all, did it?"

"Nope,"

"That's one of the things I love about you." Alice kissed me again and I sighed happily. She returned it and then licked her lips. "May I ask one thing from you?"

"Of course,"

"Would you…mind waiting until you graduated? We'll be the same age then and it will be easier to formulate a lie to get you away to be changed. If you really can't wait we'll think of something but…"

Alice had drifted because I started shaking my head. She looked sadly up at me and I hated seeing her that way so I was quick to correct her mistake. "I don't mind at all. In fact, I was just going to suggest that."

"Really?" Alice smiled.

"Really," I confirmed with a single nod. "Besides, all we have is forev—

Alice cut me off with a kiss and I was glad that she did.

It was a stupid thing to say anyway.


End file.
